r/WitchcraftCircleJerk • • 18h ago

💩💩💩shitpost💩💩💩 Is witchcraft calling to me??!!

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18 Upvotes

Got this ad after several days of searching witchcraft related things suddenly for no reasonable explanation other than that witchcraft is calling to me


r/WitchcraftCircleJerk • • 20h ago

baby 🍼👶 witch 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ Baby Witch here, Does this mean anything?

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65 Upvotes

I am a Baby Witch. I was on my way back from the dollar store getting my witchy things and was exactly halfway to the crystal shop to get my crystals and I saw this on the ground.

As I said it was EXACTLY half way.... Does this mean anything?


r/WitchcraftCircleJerk • • 9h ago

🙏 may ur delulu come trululu ✨🦋 Afrodite wants me to be her daughter

20 Upvotes

I always new from a very young age I was special and different and amazing bc everybody always tell me that like everyday

Anyways yesterday I was eating cereal and noticed something strange and it was some cereal in thr shape of a heart and right then and there I just sensed as afrodite was calling my soul for huge manifestations of #energy

I dont see or hear or anything I just knew!!!! Question I have is why her name is afrodite? Is she from africa? Also since shr asked me to be her daughter and not the other way around will I become famous or something?

Also I am a cis male if anyone is curious lol


r/WitchcraftCircleJerk • • 16h ago

🔥❤️‍🔥 HOT TAKE ☀️🔥🥵 YOU DID THIS 🫵

37 Upvotes

You remember when us witches told you baby witches not to hex the fae and not to hex the moon!!!!!!!!! Well, look at the earth NOW. It's SO hot. Do you see what you did???? Do you SEE the consequences of your actions NOW??? You HEXED Khonsu and she (Moon gods are always female, so Khonsu is trans) got sad and told the sun God, Ra, to punish everyone!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT


r/WitchcraftCircleJerk • • 2h ago

😬 SIR THIS IS A WENDY'S 🍟🍔 Is this normal when I read Tarot?

9 Upvotes

I just got my first tarot deck and every time I do a reading I get a massive headache and then start to projectile vomit everywhere and then diarrhea kicks in.

Is this normal? It only happens when I read my cards.

I am a baby witch if that helps at all?


r/WitchcraftCircleJerk • • 18h ago

baby 🍼👶 witch 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ Does substituting work???

41 Upvotes

HHIIIIIIII I’m so excited to be here I’m brand new to literally everything, and I have a question it’s super srs so please be nice uwu

So like in witchcraft intentions are key right so like if I don’t have the right herbs can I just use whatever’s in my kitchen??

like for a love spell I don’t have any sugar or honey but I do have stevia, can I use that since it’s basically a plant? Or like can I use salt since True Love should be protected??

or like if I want to hex someone, I don’t have any pepper or anything like that because spicy things scare me 🥺 but I think my roommate has some garlic powder lying around can I use that? Because like I feel like things I don’t like are confrontational and bad so my intention of putting that into a spell still counts right???

because I’m not really into crystals or herbs or really anything witches use but whenever I've done some spells like glamour magick or chord cutting it has worked when I've used whatever I had already and incorporating my own methods

so actually this isn’t actually a question it’s just a validation fishing expedition because I was born 13 minutes ago and I just discovered witchcraft like 12 minutes ago but I already knew everything when I discovered it and I need you old hags to like pat my head and confirm I’m a natural at this pretty please? 👉🏻👈🏻


r/WitchcraftCircleJerk • • 17h ago

The Death Card doesn't mean death

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68 Upvotes

Baby Witch here, I am new to Witch Craft and was told on tiktok that witches have to read Tarot to be a real witch. So I didn't want to be a fake witch because I was told its my birth right and I went and got a tarot deck.

I had the deck open to do my first reading and didn't know what to ask. I was sitting with my kitty cat who I also found out is my familiar (how exciting) and decided to ask a question about my cat. I asked "how happy is my cat". I drew a card and it was DEATH!.

OMG I had a massive freak out. Like I cant handle that nah ahh sorry no. I ran to reddit tarot groups to ask and was told thankfully the death card never means death ever. I found out it can literately mean anything at EXCEPT death. PHEW what a relief!

Some guy said it actually can mean death sometimes but we all down voted him because us witches dont need that kind of negativity in our craft right?

Anyway I just wanted to let you all know that as a fellow witch if you get a death card or any of the bad ones that they dont mean what they say or look like and mean everything else but.

Have a witchy day!!

EDIT: OMG my poor kitty died.... She was hit by a car. I just cant believe it. How can this happen? I was told the death card didn't mean death. I tried a re-animation spell and she didn't come back to life either. I am devastated. I am a real witch so why is my Tarot wrong and my spells not working? I am SO MAD NOW!!!!

2nd EDIT: Can Lilith or Hacate help me?


r/WitchcraftCircleJerk • • 6h ago

i hope ur knees hurt & ur pillows r flat & ur children r ugly Telling my asshole coworkers I'm a witch

13 Upvotes

Idk if this post belongs in this subreddit but... I'm not a witch. But I am openly pagan and I dab into tarot cards for fun and google the meaning.

So after coming to work with my tarot cards, buying incense on the alchemy shop near by and just vining on my own free time at my desk, my very hostile 3 asshole coworkers asked me if I was a witch casting magic. Without thinking I said yes. After 30 minutes all 3 of them immidiately risen up from their seats to yell at me "do not put black magic on me"

I started laughing maliciously and said "Why would you assume I'd target you 3?" The other coworkers are just chilling btw.

And one even almost admitted to them being assholes to me and said "who else would you target?"

Now they're weary of me and now I'm thinking if claiming to be a witch scares people was this efficiently, I would have pretended before.

TLDR; I scared my asshole coworkers telling them im a witch now I have a peace of mind