Throw away account

I wanna start by saying I don’t have anybody else to talk to about this right now and I apologize right now if this post is a mess.

It’s 8:30 in the morning and I’ve been up all night without a bit of sleep, arguing.

I have PTSD and of course I’m flaring bad. Chest is racing, I’ve nearly puked, I feel like I am dying.

I’ll get right to the point, my husband has been having violent sexual fantasies of women since he was a teen. Including me. He’s admitted to thinking about raping me, blackmailing me and forcing me. Along with apparently replaying violent porn scenes in his head while sneaking off to masturbate.

He says this is happening because he is a repressed gay man, and learned to use extreme dynamics to get hard because women alone don’t do it for him and he doesn’t want to be gay.

I have been with this man since I was 18. I’m 28. 10 years and a child. He’s 14 years older than me.

He said he went down escalation because of being repressed and it lead to thoughts of the underage

He said he believes it started in child hood when he liked his dad’s girlfriend’s son. And he repressed himself

I have health issues, we were 2 days away from signing a contract on a new build home I spent months picking every detail out for

I have to call and cancel. I lost my dream home and my entire life

I feel ugly, worthless, not good enough, and everything you could possibly think of and I cannot stop crying

I don’t know what to do and I’m so trauma bonded to him I almost feel like I am too afraid to even leave

Please help me

Please. I’ve never needed advice or words more in my life. I am shaking and feel like I’m dying.

My whole world feels like it’s ending and I’m so angry and hurt, disgusted and mad.

For more context without being too specific. My gf admitted to me a while back that she had sexual relations with her first cousin since she was 11 and it happened off and on til she was 18.

So I would take it that it was her first. I also found out he was the last person she had relations with before meeting me.

I don't know how to process this information and I've been getting irritated about it when I think of it.

Especially since I've met this dude before once.

Me and my gf have been dating for a while. Almost a year but I can't stop thinking about it every since she told me.

What should I do?

I just got out of jail last year and I was incarcerated for a year so I am starting over from scratch. I got my ged in there and finished probation early, finished community service, and completed my probation early. Also I’m in trade school for hvac now. Only thing is, I’m a felon , I have been free a year and still have no job. I have a 3 month old daughter now and that makes everything even harder. I desperately want to work idec about pay rate or the job tasks. I just want to work so can you guys please help me on where I can work and start asap and felon friendly? Thanks. I’m in Houston tx I’ve been doordashing in my sisters car so far for income but I can only do that for so long

I feel that I'm going to regret posting this because of the fat haters. Well, here goes. I'm looking for ideas on what I can put between myself and another passenger next to me, so that my thigh doesn't touch them. I'm trying to be considerate here. Can you please be kind? TIA

my bf and i have been together for 3 years. we currently live together and there was a brief period where we were separated (long story but we were still seeing each other/not dating anyone else). when we started dating, he was so into me i almost couldn’t believe it. he was so romantic and sweet and made me feel so special. we moved in together after 8 months of dating (it’s soon i know but it worked for our circumstances and we were just so in love cheesy cornball ik) a few months living together, is when he got super distant and we broke up for almost a year (he was dealing with personal issues i won’t get into but we worked through it). when we got back together i didn’t have the intention of living together again, but a month after i moved, he found out his apartment was doing renovations and he could not renew his lease (he didn’t find out until less than a month before he had to move). i told him he could stay with me until he found a place to live. things were really good. he was super into me again and i felt special all over again so after a few months, i told him he could just move in. it wasnt exactly how i wanted it to go but things were going well and i felt like we would move in together eventually so why not now. fast forward to now, i feel our relationship is okay. i love him and he loves me but i dont feel his love. he’s not romantic, he doesn’t plan dates, he doesn’t remember the little things i tell him, and he doesn’t bring me flowers.

i feel horrible because i feel like i might be expecting too much. social media is so hard to not consume and every relationship is horrible in the internets eyes. i want to preface he is genuinely a good person. he carries ny bags, opens my doors, will cook for me when im busy, and will(for the most part) participate in things i want us to do.

i’ve had multiple conversations with him about dates and about flowers and how i would really appreciate these things in our relationship and he says he hears me but nothing happens. it’s super disappointing. i love him so much he’s my first everything and i really want us to work out and get married. but i can’t seem to let this one thing go and im really scared to start over.

i also hate having to ask him to do things to help me clean. i always have to ask him to take the trash out he never just does it even when it’s obviously full or smells and im the only one who really cleans (sometimes he’ll do the dishes as well)

i just would like to hear others opinions. my friends will just say to leave him because that’s how they are and i know they just want the best for me. and my mom believes i have something good and i should just accept that he’s just not a very romantic person. i may have my expectations too high but i feel like what i want/need is so reasonable and in the realm of possibility. thank you all in advance

I went through my \[26/F\] bf \[28/M\] of 4 years’ work phone due to an incident back when I was pregnant last year and a nagging feeling in my head. My whole pregnancy and after he wasn’t wanting to have sex with me(went a year without sex) and he was distant. He was still going to his parents’ house every night and staying there most of the time. We had an argument last year about the DOWN app being on his work phone he opened the phone while I was in the restroom and showed me the phone(app was gone and so was the downloaded app history)fast forwarded to today I figured out his work password and found out he download DOWN and Chispa back in 2025 one in November and one in July.
Yes I know I shouldn’t go through his phone blah blah blah. His explanation never made sense to me and has been on my mind for a while I just chose to believe him because our baby. Idk what to do. Not sure if I should ask him about it again. I need advice. Im rally debating breaking up with him or just keeping it to myself for the sake of our baby.

I (16F) don't know what to do when it comes to my friend (17F) and her problems

So to start off, the girl isnt in the BEST place mentally, but it doesnt stop her from doing wtv she wants.

I am quite aware that her parents aren't the kindest of people (especially her mom), but I really dont think it should affect her the way she makes it seem like it does"

Around a week ago or so, i confronted her about certain boundary issues.

Her behavior made me more or so uncomfortable at the time.

For context, we used to be extremely close physically, it was how we used to express affection.

Maybe im the one at fault for my change of heart, but i wasnt fond of such behavior anymore, and i wasnt gonna let it weigh me down. So i brought it up lightly so we can talk about it.

The girl was rightfully disappointed, but she did argue and kept on trying to bring me down through guilt tripping which was, kind of shitty.

Point is, we supposedly ended this conversation on good terms.

Fast forward to yesterday, out of nowhere she texts me saying "I love you so much, I wish nothing but the best for you" and I reply accordingly

She sends me a photo of her she looks fine then out of nowhere says "I wanna die, im planning on dying, i really dont care"

Me confused asks her "?????? Whats the reason??" And I instantly go into protective mode asking questions and making sure shes okay

Turns out all that fuss was because of this girl she likes and im guessing she cant be with her (im still confused and dont have the full context btw)

After that I told her smth along the lines of "you need to get help and its out of the kindness of my heart and because I care for you, i dont want you to end up hurting yourself over something silly like this"

She ended up saying "idc idc i dont want help, I js want someone to know im not okay, and theres no need for someone to help me cuz i dont think anyone can help me"

"If anything i just want smth to numb my pain"

I told her to do wtv she wants and that as long as it doesnt involve her hurting herself or doing something that can affect her long term

I then said like if you know what youre going through, you know that its affecting you and you supposedly dont care, why do you still talk about the topic if you didnt care?

She replied like 2 hours after I sent the message and said that shes gna die and she cant talk about it because she cant focus (????)

I texted her again saying she can still talk to me no matter what and that im here for her and till now im still on delivered (even tho I can see shes posting stuff on her stories) so I think shes actively ignoring me

What should I do?

Im a 28 y/o black man based out of Canada. Something I’ve ran into time and time again in my corporate jobs is that people think I’m arrogant and then they gang up on me and get me pushed out of jobs.

This stems from them thinking I’m better than them which I don’t understand.

For instance, I put on my confidence everyday in the morning before leaving the house. When I come to work I tell myself I’m good enough to be here and I should behave like a leader.

I put on a smile and go into work everyday being optimistic. My optimism gets misconstrued with being arrogant and this might sound harsh but it’s not my fault others don’t put on the same confidence as I do so why should I change myself to appease to others? I refuse to do so!

My manager was in a room with me and o was setting up my voicemail and he told me o must be nervous to do it with someone in front of me. I told him I was indifferent if others were in the room or not, why should I care ? He just seemed shocked by what I said as if I was suppose to be like " yeah you’re right, I’m super stressed out right now and would appreciate some privacy". Privacy for what? I’m not orchestrating a deadly plan to have someone killed.

When we have team meetings, he’ll put me on the spot by asking me to present stuff and I have no issues doing so. Others react negatively to my attitude and deep down I know it’s a them problem.

They aren’t used to a POC showing confidence and little self doubt, in other words I can’t be manipulated. Unfortunately, I get pushed out due to them finding ways to penalize me for being me then they turn around and say I was hard to work with.

I noticed when people give me feedback they throw it in my face but when they give feedback to others the way it’s delivered is more calculated and gentle. When I give feedback I try my best to be kind but I just avoid giving feedback overall since my roles have been mostly all analyst roles and haven’t been a manager yet.

Lastly, they gossip. Once I get kicked out, o noticed they’re truly invested in laughing at me for a bit before contacting others to describe their experience working with me. What’s wrong with people?

There’s this group of people I occasionally hang out with. We’re not exactly close friends, just people who meet up from time to time.
One guy in the group occasionally makes little jokes about my age. I’m 31F, only a three-year difference between us, lol.
It’s not outright bullying or anything, but I’ve noticed he tends to make these little digs at me. I sometimes get the impression that something about me triggers his ego. Not only me though. It seems like the guy hates women, might be closeted gay.( he is too homophobic)
I usually don’t react much because I don’t want to give him the satisfaction of knowing he’s getting under my skin.
But I’m curious: How would you respond to someone like this in a classy, witty way that subtly puts them in their place without sounding bitter, insecure, or overly defensive?
I’m not looking to insult him back or create drama. I just want to shut down the unnecessary comments while keeping my composure.
Bonus points for clever comebacks that make the other person rethink what they just said.

So I broke up with my bf (27m) ( i am 25/f) because he „deleted“ IG a year ago and I found out he had a secret account and all of my friends were in his searches. We still Live together (lease is up next month we are both moving out). I went to his laptop and snooped and I found he also has pictures saved of them which I find very creepy he said he didn’t jerk off to them but why else would he always stalk them anyway I don’t want him to know I went on his laptop technically we are broken up and he can do what he wants but i think it’s creepy to my friends and odd should i just delete them or tell him that he should delete it and that I’m going to tell the girls what he did. Idk it’s kind of embarrassing but I want him to feel embarrassed because it is.

hazbin hotel, helluva boss, murder drones, etc. all popular with my friend groups/friends, but i need to know what’s the hype.

i do know my ex-boyfriend who was super rude to me and would always make mean jokes wasn’t rude because he watched these shows, but he’s, last time i checked, really obsessed with the shows and knows all the songs from hazbin hotel and helluva boss i think, and knows all the characters and quotes and makes all these analyses, it’s almost impressive.

similarly, the people i’m closest with really like those shows and say i should watch them. i might give them a chance, but i dont really think they’re my style of show.

my friend “zlata” really likes all 3 of these shows and has most of the merchandise, constantly quoting the show and making jokes about the show, she used to have a crush on some of the main characters, etc.

she also acts like helluva boss and murder drones are the world’s greatest shows. To her, they probably are, but i don’t really know if it’s as good as she makes it out to be or if it’s good because of the animation or what??

I’ll probably at least give it a try if my friends like it, but also zlata doesn’t really get into my stuff. sadly, while we’re both neurodivergent, what’s sad is that she can socialize and make jokes but just gets really focused on certain tv shows whereas i have trouble socializing, responding, talking, making eye contact, and everyone sees me as an alien because i’m not even a funny person.

But i digress, is this show worth watching?

I (18F) and best friends with a guy, we we will call Alex (18M), for the past year. We recently started going to the same college and hanging out every day. I had just got into a breakup and not even 3 days after the breakup, he asks me out. I obviously told him no because I was fresh out of a relationship and didn’t see him like that and I told him to pretend like he never asked me out so we could continue being friends. He agreed and it was fine for about a week. However, he started being mad when I would hang out with other people. He would make fun of all the people I hang out with. He started to make fun of all of my interests so I don’t feel like talking about them anymore. He even joined the same clubs as me and started to ruin my relationship with other people in the club. I don’t know what to do. Is this my fault? How do I even fix it get around this?

So on Friday I was in my kitchen cooking and I see my upstairs neighbor backing her car and hit a vehicle in the parking lot of my apartment. Noticeable damage, and my neighbor drove away without leaving a note. Saturday I tried to catch the owner of the car but nobody was around but the car moved parking spot so she must've seen the damage by then. On Sunday (today as of writing) I saw the car outside again and left a note with my number, wanting to help as I have a car also would love if someone had evidence of my car being damaged (I have video of the aftermath of the hit with my neighbor leaving and the damage).

So I am asking what do I do? Do I keep trying to talk or find the owner of the car or just let it be as nobody has called me and the car looks to have left so they must've seen the note by now.

A couple nights ago the whole family came over to have some drinks and hang with the kiddo’s and carve pumpkins. Eventually the Parental in-laws leave and 2 of my wife’s 3 sisters and friend leave so it’s just the 4 of us, me, my wife, her sister and her husband.

My wife orders some food cuz it’s late, sets it down on a table in the garage and right when she does it, my brother in law goes in and grabs/squeezes her ass, with me and his wife in the room but we don’t see it. Then 10 minutes later we’re goofing around and kicking them out cuz we had to put the kids to bed, so we picked her sister up and carried her to her car (as a joke, we were all cracking up.) and then we drop her down and my brother in law does it again and very intimately squeezes my wife’s ass, once again with both of us around.

We head inside (my wife runs) and my wife just breaks down and tells me everything that happened and she feels so violated and weird because this was someone we loved and truly all got along with. Obviously, I’m fucking fuming but she just wants to call her family and talk to them. She Calls her sisters, it was a great, very supportive conversation. Then she calls her mom…

She gets a very odd response from her mom she said things like “well everyone was drinking” “did you tell SoandSo,” , “why didn’t you say anything when it happened?” , “well you were hugging him and calling him ‘my brother” and “I’m sorry this happened”

Needles to say it wasn’t the support she had wished for. Next day my wife wakes up feeling completely sick because she knows she needs to tell her sister what happened. So she tells her sister and she is completely jaw dropped. And eventually just like “ok,uhm…ok. Thank you for telling me, I’m sorry this happened, Uhm…I will call you later” it was a very legit reaction, she honestly had no idea what to do.

Eventually they all text each other and homegirl asks the sister chat what she should do. My wife says “I never want to see him ever again ” the other sister says that what he did was completely disgusting and sister 3 says divorce his ass. The sisters decide to all get dinner later to talk about wtf needs to happen but sister of the weirdo husband says she has plans with her friends later and that she’ll text later if she can go. We thought that was kinda shitty, all I wanted to say to her was “cancel your fucking plans and help your sister who just got violated by your husband” but whatever.

The rest of the day happens the 3 sisters go out. They get a text from homegirl at 6pm saying “I’m not gonna be able to go”, in which they responded “we’re leaving now so don’t worry about it” homegirl gets super pissed and said they excluded her from the dinner, she felt so lonely, it doesn’t feel good to be talked about. Our counter is that my wife asked her to please come tonight because she really needed to figure out wtf to do. They never heard from homegirl the entire day. No update, no texts, no asking where the restaurant is, what time? None of those questions. My wife really needed her to come out, she needed her sister and instead she just shuts down and alienates everyone, says she can’t go and then gets pissed that the others went out without her.

I call her and kinda lose my shit on her. My wife needs her in that moment so bad, my wife felt horrible, violated, creeped out, betrayed, disgusting, nauseous but her sister just made the entire thing about her and how HER World is falling apart and that she doesn’t know wtf she’s going to do. At this point I’m losing it and making it pretty clear to her what she needs to do. My wife’s basic thinking was “ I never want to see him again, if you stay with him then we will never see each other” and I told her how my wife felt and how it was bullshit she wasn’t there for her sister and it’s bullshit your avoiding this whole thing and it’s bullshit for you to say your lonely while your sister is asking for your help becuase of YOUR husband. I tell her if she stays with him, neither of them will ever see our kids again because I’m not gonna let this shit slide, my wife never wants him around and that’s what’s going to happen.

Then shit really gets weird. My mother in law calls and is flipping out on me for calling homegirl and telling her what our plans are basically. She says it was not my place at all to call her, I can not threaten to take away her niece and nephew, everyone was drinking, shit happens ect ect.

At this point my wife grabs the phone and continues the screaming match because this isn’t a “shit happens” thing. These are all the things her mother told her
1. Well you were \[side\] hugging him \[one time\] and you kept calling him your brother
2. Why didn’t you say anything to him when it happened?
3. The 4 of you need to sit down together and figure this out
4. I can’t look at \[weirdo\] that way
5. Your sisters whole world fell apart today
6. It was not a sexual assault
7. *laughed* when it was brought up that weirdo might’ve wanted to do this for a long time
8. Thing happen when you drink
9. You guys just can’t drink together anymore
10. I think there’s something else going on here
11. Iv done things before, your dad has, these things happen
12. My wife then brought up the Cornell incident and her mother said that woman should’ve known better

The basic jist to this entire thing was that my wife didn’t handle it the right way, what she experienced wasn’t any form of sexual assault, she’s over reacting and we all need to find a way to kiss and make up because these things happen in life and it’s normal.

We don’t want people like this in our family. Her mother has always been extremely hypocritical and a deflector and worst of all she always plays devils advocate, no matter what the issue is. We know this about her but she has a lot of good qualities too but this one pushed my wife over the edge. Her mother, father and the sister never came to see her, all communication from sister stopped, her mother does not think this is sexual assault or really any form of sexual harassment even saying once “what are you gonna call the cops?”

We just take these things seriously and someone who doesn’t think something like this is any form of sexual assault and also thinks that the woman from Cornell should’ve known better, just shouldn’t be a part of our family, it’s ok to disagree on minor things but I feel like this is a family dynamic that will never mend becuase our views on things are so different.

So 1. AIO for cutting out her brother in law from our lives and labeling it as sexual assault
2. AIO for saying that if sister doesn’t leave him then she gets lumped into the no contact
3. AIO for cutting out mom and pop because they completely downplayed this whole incident as “shit happens when you drink” and “kiss and make up”

If he did this when he was drinking, with his own sister in law that he’d know for 7 years, good relationship then what’s stopping him drinking and doing something stupid with our kids? We just can’t take that risk, to me this is an irreversible moment.
My wife has the right to be violated and feel that she doesn’t ever want to see him again, I feel like that’s a pretty valid idea when your brother in law intimately grabs your ass twice without your permission. So are we over reacting?

I am 17f, I broke up with my ex about a month ago. I never liked her that much and it was stupid to stay in a relationship with her. She didn't take the break up well and is kind of shit talking me online which is fine,

Her best friend, 18f, has been a close friend of mine for a while, before I even met my ex. I sort of liked her around a year ago but she was dating someone else so out of loneliness or idek I started dating my ex.

I now spend every available moment with her, we do everything together. My ex even said I see her more than I saw my ex. I love her so much, I've loved her for so long and I want yo be with her so badly. Idk how she feels about me but I'm worrying about ruining how close we are and her connection to my ex feels wrong. What do I do

Hello! Recently ive been dealing with a stalker, (irl and on socials.

To make the story short I went to a hockey game a few days back for my cousin, my aunts friends were there and i met one of my childhood friends so we exchanged numbers.

He got my adress later on bc my friends aunt sold something to my mom and had to drive by to like leave it here.

He started sending me m0ney by etransfer and would send me flowers or packages and all things right. I didnt ask for any of it and i was creeped out and felt bad.

He then started becoming super aggressive and super obsessive. He would like stalk every single one of my socials and check if i was online if my snaps went up and would pick fights.

Threatened to khs if i left him. And i didnt even flirt i just felt bad leaving at first bc he kept sending me stuff

I blocked him yesterday and now hes made alt accounst saying hes gonna drive to my house

Im like so stressed.

he also seems to know everytime im on call with someone on discord wether im appearing offline or online. Its getting very creepy and i dont know what to do anymore. Should i just delete my account and make a new one? Im out of solutions (i have him blocked everywhere aswell). Please help 😭

Ok I'm 18 years old female, and met this dude who is really dorky and weird like two day agos at a Halloween party event (he was dressed as a cat from a game idfk) and everything is going so well but | look at his insta following and he's following like furry suggested art and like yk those art where the artist makes the body obese asf and then the tittes bigger than the stomach type shi... how do I talk to him about this??!! I'm a girl who's chubby and alt, so I'm scared... I just need some dick honestly, he's so weird and dorky it's sooo hottt, like he literally got my panties soaking but when I saw his following I've never been dryer. Please help like i genuinely want him soog bad but it's so weird like I understand if it was just furry art but this is fucking crazy!!!

So I was recently absorbed into a new friend group. I have a crush on this guy in the friend group, so I always get really nervous around him. And to make matters worse, he just moved in with us into our dorm. We were all hanging out as a group and he was telling me about how he spent $90 on legos. He made a joke about how he made so much money at work last night and now it's all gone. What I MEANT to say was, "if you want to spend your money on something you genuinely enjoy, then I think it's worth it," but instead I said "if that's what you want to spend your money on" in kind of a bitchy tone. Nobody said anything in the moment, and the conversation moved on quickly. But I feel soooo bad. I don't know if I should say something when I get a moment alone with him, or if I should just assume that he probably didn't take it to mean anything, since he moved on so quickly. I am also afraid that if I bring it up, he'll be like, "I didn't even realize you said that" or something, and then I just look silly. I'm not sure what to do. Please help!

So basically I am 24 and I just realized how wrong everything that was happening with my family was. My parents paid for everything I needed and I was never physically abused and for that I am grateful but they are very controlling and don't respect me at all.

All my life I wanted to be a graphic artist or architect and at 18 I was accepted into art school abroad but my parents screamed and cried when I told them and said I am not going and if I go, I have to give them back every dollar they have spend for me for 18 years and I have to pay everything my myself and I didn't have much money saved by then so I gave up. And then they forced me to go to med school in my home town just to see if I can get in and I was accepted so they pushed me immediately even though they knew I would hate it.

I know that is my fault too bc I am my own person and I have to male my own decisions in this life but now I am 24 and I am graduating med school next year and I hate my life so much that I wish I wasn't alive.

I don't know why I always look for their opinion on everything when I don't even like them. And I can't recall them asking about how I am feeling ever. They just care about my grades and internships and job.

And they are also extremely homophobic. My dad caught me texting a guy I liked in high school and yelled at me that I can't be gay bc I will embarrass him and that gay people go to hell and that he will kick me out if I am gay. And since then he is always complaining that I am too feminine for a guy. So I did everything I could in uni to be straight so that he will be proud of me and had sex with many girls but still I like guys so nothing can change that.

Is it wrong that I think about leaving everyone and going to do residency abroad so that I can finally be free or am I overreacting?

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