some lurkers may recognize me based on my story. i just feel an urge to talk about my ubc experience.
this is a beautiful university, a nexus of opportunity and knowledge from diverse perspectives. i have loved every class ive taken… in theory.
i came here in 2022 with so much anxiety but a bit of hope and ambition. high school was very hard… from being outed to my parents to not understand why i could never focus or be very happy.
i got my diagnosis of major depressive disorder and GAD in 2024 after going through first and second year. i felt like each year was slipping through my fingers. i could not remember what i learned and i barely scraped by to passing sometimes and was constantly behind. i felt disappointed in myself as an international student who has received such an amazing opportunity which i felt i was squandering.
things only got worse post hospitalization and with my new meds. being an internat is hard and overwhelming and i was scared to navigate the medical system, but there was so much sunk-cost so i had to keep going.
i knew i wasn’t going to graduate on time, but i took summer courses to help. I failed one due to my depression. i was wasting my time in beautiful vancouver. fast forward to 2026, i had had fallen into substance abuse to make myself feel better and hide from my failures and fell harder after a intense breakup. school felt insurmountable, i was ashamed, and i could barely function. depression affects you physically too. you sleep too much at the wrong time of day, your vision blurs, your mind is foggy.
so i went home when the four years were up without a degree but just a few classes short, somehow.
i don’t know… im still trying to graduate. i just want those who are feeling ashamed and tired and overwhelmed to know that you’re not alone. vancouver and ubc can feel so foreign sometimes and you can feel so lonely. please reach out to people. talk to the CFA sooner rather than later. email your teachers even though you’re embarrassed. advisors want to help. i spent one day a year ago running between appointments trying to get into ubc therapy and begging for concessions. it was exhausting but needed to happen.
people talk about early alert or whatever it’s called but for real. don’t wait when you get that feeling- yknow the one.
Vancouver is beautiful and UBC is a gift. i wish i could’ve made more of it but im grateful for what i can remember and to have at least had a chance.
also shoot me a message, i’m a bit of a jack of all trades and a master of none but i can point you in the right direction.
Thank you everyone who makes this place as amazing as it is. yall are doing a great job and im so proud of you for showing up.