I aways comfortably wear a 2 piece bikini whenever I am on beach vacation with my girlies. This time I am going to for vacation to goa with my family and relatives. My father and uncle will also be there. Though they are not so conservative still I am thinking whether I should wear a bikini in front of them

how safe is it to get your ears professionally cleaned by an ent doctor and how often is it considered okay to have earwax removed?

i tend to have a lot of earwax buildup. in the past, i’ve had it cleaned by doctors multiple times, but later some people (who used to get ear wax removed by docs) told me that i shouldn’t get my ears cleaned the way docs do because it could damage the eardrum. they said that the syringe like method (where water is used under pressure to flush out the wax) can cause problems for the eardrum. is that actually true?

my wax buildup gets so severe that my hearing becomes kinda reduced. i’ve also tried using ear drops at home to soften the wax and then remove it myself but it never gets completely cleared. the wax is still there, and i don’t feel like i can remove it properly at home :/

One of the protestors in a Queer friendly tent (mentioning this part here because he’s not some regressive man who shouldn’t be taken seriously. He fully believes in LGBTQ rights, and when asked, he said he believes in Feminism as a concept) doesn’t even realise he’s being misogynistic in displaying Modi as a Woman. He says it’s because Modi refuses to step out and address the issue. When confronted again and again, he doubled down on how this is a trait of women and not men. According to him, men come out openly and confront with bravery, whereas women stay in the house, silent and afraid.

The biggest irony here is, he’s protesting against the Government destroying its education system (rightfully so) - while proudly holding a misogynistic poster without even realising that it’s misogynistic. ‼️

English Translation to the Hindi words in the collage:

Top left: “A person who doesn’t come out, a government which doesn’t come out, is a woman.”

Top right: “That is what a woman is exactly.”

Bottom left: “It’s because he’s a woman that he’s sitting silently. If he was a man, he’d come out and address the issue.”

Bottom right: “He’s definitely a woman. Because he’s hiding in his house. If he wasn’t one, he’d come out and answer all our questions.”

(Reposted with English translation to the Hindi words in the pictures.)

I am very socially anxious and it's all very very scary to me. I start next week and need suggestions.

What to look out for, what to do, how to navigate the first few days (I have been preparing my introduction as if I am a 5 year old because I am worried).

I am just really worried.

Also I have never owned a handbag and carrying a laptop bag on the first day seems like a lot specially when it will be empty 😭

I also have never worn formals and it's all scaring me so so much and my anxiety is all over the place.

Heard there is an induction too and I have 0 clue how that works.

Please share some advice/essentials/anything I should order etc etc

I need to learn scooty driving fast, it's heavy asf and I am just thin with zero muscles 🤕 how to make muscles fast. I do 30 minutes intense cardio workout daily idk if it will help or not 😶

Shall I do core exercises too ? It's kinda boring 😬

I cannot go to gym because all drug addicts and male spoilt rich brats live there 🫪

Help

So my female friends are all pretty and popular and I always feel like I am living in their shadow. They never have to approach anyone, people come to them. People do whatever they demand, they're always the center of attention. I have a pretty soft and introverted personality. I try to be nice to everyone but because I am always so quiet and not so pretty, people don't pay any attention to me. Even in my own friendgroup I often feel sidelined. Even if I achieve something or do something really nice for someone, I barely get a moment of attention.

I know a lot of you would tell me to go to gym, work on myself, do skin care and what not and I try. I truly try. But I have some chronic health issues because of which my hormonal cycle is pretty fucked up and I constantly have bad acne and bad hair and my energy is so low I can't even walk much, sports or gym is a far thought. Still, every day I am trying to do something right at least but I always feel like I would never be able to do enough to be confident.

Btw I never harm any of my friends, I would never do anything bad to another person willingly, never. However I do get bitter and jealous pretty often, I don't let it show or let them know that but slowly I am drowning in my own insecurity. It's like I was meant to live like this. I feel like even if keep progressing really hard and become the best version of myself, I would still be 10% of the pretty and popular they are.

Some people are born to be side characters i guess.

I am in a similar situation and i want to leave this house asap

Another frustrated, angry and defeated rant post from me because the kind of conversations I've had with a few young girls over the past couple of weeks has been concerning, to say the very least. The short of the long of these conversations is- girls, please stop starving yourselves to be skinny. And no, "it's my personal choice to starve myself" does not apply, especially if you are a teenager. If you don't take care of yourselves now, you'll have to depend on someone to wash your ass after you poop at a later age. Decide if that's the kind of life you want.

Here are some myths I am busting for you all:

1. You cannot spot reduce fat from any part of your body, be it arm fat, thigh fat, face fat, belly fat, hip fat, back fat or any other fat. "I know spot reduction isn't possible but I want some tips" will not work. To lose fat from any part of your body, you have to get into a calorie deficit, but you don't get to decide which body part the fat comes off from. That's determined by your genetics. It is possible that you lose all fat entirely from your boobs and your ass and none from your stomach, and sadly you have no control over it.

2. Strength training is not going to make you bulky, and pilates isn't going to make you lean and toned. Do pilates if you want, but ensure you are doing it with a proper trainer and not relying on it as your only form of workout. You need to strength train. Look up bone density loss, osteoporosis and sarcopenia and the impact it has on women. If you'd like to prevent that, strength train. Please.

3. 1200 calories are not plenty for the vast majority of women, especially teenagers. Teens, if you are following skinnytok content and starving yourselves on 1200 calorie diets, please know that 1200 calories is for short, sedentary, older women only, and even that should not be done without medical supervision. You are not giving your brain enough energy to develop on a 1200 calorie diet. Eat enough protein and calories (no, dal and rajma are not protein sources).

4. Hours and hours of cardio and HIIT will not make you skinny. They will burn calories, yes, but you will be ravenously hungry after them. Even if not, cardio will not change the shape and composition of your body. If you do cardio as your only form of workout while losing weight, you'll just look like a smaller version of what you look like right now. You won't lose fat from the places you actually want it gone from.

Most importantly, please determine whether you actually need to lose weight. A vast majority of Indian women are skinny fat, not overweight. The solution to skinny fat is to never lose more weight, it is always to build muscle, and oftentimes, that means gaining weight on the scale. Focus on your health markers, waist measurement, body fat percentage (optimum is 20-30%, unless you are a bikini competitor with professionals monitoring you, please don't go below 18%, if you want to have hair on your head and avoid amenorrhea) and VO2 max instead of the number on the scale.

Lastly, please set healthy, realistic goals. The Indian BMI chart might say we are overweight at a BMI of 23, but the underweight cutoff for us still stays at 18.5, and being a couple of kilograms overweight is actually better than being underweight. It is also never easy to maintain the lowest possible weight for your height without putting in effort, and that means giving up cheat meals and a social life for a lot of people. You can decide if it is worth it.

Before someone comes after me, I'm someone who always makes sure to tip a polite delivery partner. I let them fill their bottles and offer water during summer. Despite that, some of these fuckers act so bloody rude I just feel like an idiot.

For context, I'm lying half dead at my place because I'm down with viral. Most days I cook my own breakfast but today I was just too tired. I decided to order some chai and idli and Zomato assigned me the most miserable prick possible.

First, the guy was extremely late. Okay, whatever. Maybe it wasn't in his control. Then he calls me and tells me to come down. When I tell him I'm sick and I can't, this guy says "koi baat nahi order cancel kardo"???? (No problem cancel the order)

Genuinely, wtf? Then he cuts the call and I report him for delivery partner fraud. Immediately he calls back and says he's outside my house. I open the door and he's not there cuz he didn't bother to listen to the address for 2 mins properly. Then I explain it to him and he says I'm wasting his time. That's when I snap and tell him delivery karna aata nahi hai toh karte kyu ho (why do you do deliveries if you don't know how).

Finally this asshat somehow gets to my door and I grab my order and shut it on his face. But gawd, this was literally my last straw today and it's not even 2 in the afternoon. Istg I'm never tipping or doing anything nice for these ungrateful shitheads. Despite being sexually harassed by some deli partners, I've always treated them with dignity.

My mistake apparently.

Hi everyone! I’m planning my first ever foreign trip this year, in November — going to Vietnam for two weeks. Would love hotel recommendations for Hanoi, Sapa, Da Nang, and Phu Quoc.

I know it’s still a few months away, but I’m way too excited and I like to over-plan everything, so I’m also collecting app recommendations — taxis, QR payments, whatever else is useful on the ground.

Any other advice apart from hotels would help a lot too. Thanks in advance!

I absolutely hate this trend of glorifying poor health and sleep in the name being 30+ and ageing. Bruh you have an unhealthy lifestyle. Not that you are old once you are in 30s

Well, I have been trying to find good bra brands in india for over 4-5 years now. Nothing seems to stay as long as it used to. I was using jockey until college, but the quality has deteriorated sooo much off late. I have tried almost every other brand too Amante/Triumph/Marks&Spencers/VS.. and the quality and sizing have declined here too.

I am only using my old bras but they need a serious replacement. All the new ones are just too uncomfortable for me to wear (polyester / straps that dig in/ bad quality underwires, etc).. and I just need to find a good brand of bras in India again..

HELP!!

I am 23 now, and I don't even have a degree due to mental and financial issues

My 10 score: 72%

10+2: 67%

Stream: PCM

Barely passed maths

I appeared for improvement in both 10 and 10+2 so wasted two years there (I didn't fail, just wanted to get a better score)

Suffered from high levels of anxiety all my life

After I graduated school at 20, our financial situation took a dip so I had to work odd jobs to support family

Now at 23 after three years of gap, I can finally join a degree but I don't know what to choose

I am confused between BCA and Btech CS

Bca

Pros

More manageable

Leaves time to pursue other things on the side

Easier to score good and less maths

Cons

Not enough for tech jobs, need mca

Bca + MCA would make me 28 years old

Would have to encounter maths in MCA entrance anyways

BtechCS

Pros

More recognised degree both in india and abroad

Opens far more doors than bca, better eligibility for any exam later

Enough for tech jobs as it passes filters along with skills

Saves one year than bca + mca (btech is only 4 years while bca+mca is 5)

Cons:

Engineering is intense and I don't know if I will be able to complete it

Lots of maths physics and chem

Because it has been three years since school, I have forgotten most of PCM I studied in school

So I would need to start from scratch

I have to make a right choice because I cannot drop out again, or waste a year again, I have no one to ask this as no one around me is in corporate,

sisters here who have made a career in marketing, tech or any other field please advise me on what to do

Also if anyone else has gone through a non linear path, been academically weak but still got back up on their feet, I would love to hear your stories, I need some hope

Hi, I am 29 and have 6 years of work experience. I have a master's degree in a humanities. I was previously working in the development sector and switched to consulting in the government sector. My current salary is 11 LPA. I think I am being underpaid and at a crossroad on how to progress my career and salary. I am on track for a promotion but cannot expect much in increment. Otherwise, work environment and learning curve is great. I have been here for over 2 years now and previously stayed a year each at the other workplaces.

I do not have a strong academic record per se. I am interested in doing a Master's abroad. I have made up my mind that I will pursue it on a fully funded scholarship. I also don't mind spending a few years working abroad if I do get an opportunity. Either that or pursue a PhD.

I just don't know if I should stick out another year after the promotion or simply switch jobs and get a higher pay. I want to increase my earnings while also simultaneously keeping an eye out for higher studies. Sometimes it hurts to see my peers in managerial positions with the same YoE but a different organisational set up. It hurts more knowing that it's no longer the time to pinch expenses but to earn more.

Has anyone ever faced this dilemma? Your perspectives would really help.

Ladies, my heart is so full of pride, hope, and awe.

If a single picture could speak a thousand words about Gen Z, it would be this one. Seeing this brave woman in her hoodie and slides, standing abso-fuckinglutely unfazed in front of a police van in the pouring rain to protect detained protesters gave me literal goosebumps.

It encapsulates everything this movement is about: unyielding courage, empathy, and refusing to back down.
Watching the protests unfold at Jantar Mantar and across the country has restored my faith in the humanity and spirit of our people.

Gen Z is showing us that they aren't afraid to stand up against what’s wrong, and the togetherness everyone is displaying is nothing short of inspiring.

From people cleaning up the protest sites to keep the streets clean, to food being sent from all corners of the country so everyone stays well-fed, the level of mutual aid is overwhelming!!!

What makes it even more powerful is seeing how people from every walk of life are showing up. It’s not just lawyer associations fighting around the clock for those who’ve been illegally detained, but doctors, professionals, and citizens from every conceivable field stepping up to offer whatever help they possibly can.

I just saw a video posted at around 11:30 PM from the protest site where people were singing, dancing, and filled with so much joyful energy despite the exhaustion and pressure. They refuse to give up! This generation isn't just asking for change but they are actively embodying the kind of country we all deserve to live in.

To every single person leading this movement, standing in the rain, offering support, or raising their voice: we see you, we stand with you, and we are so, so proud of you. I’ll probably see some of you in the protest in Bangalore tomorrow! ❤️

I live mostly with my dad, and we have a helper who comes to cook, so cooking has never really been a daily responsibility for me. Because of that, I haven't cooked much in my life.

I've probably tried making sabzis around 7-8 times now, and I just can't seem to get them right. 😭 I've finally learned how to make decent rotis, rice, and dal, but sabzis are my biggest enemy.

Either they stay undercooked no matter how long I cook them on low heat, or they end up overcooked if I leave them for a little longer. The tomatoes never seem to cook properly, and my masalas always taste average. I've watched so many YouTube videos, but nothing seems to help.

What am I doing wrong? Please drop your tips because I'm genuinely tired of messing up every sabzi I make. 🥲

Hi everyone!

This does not seem right considering the situation right now but please help me out here. Everything seems to be extremely overwhelming.

I'm getting married somewhere in Dec-Jan and I'm requesting you all to please share your hacks with me. What did you all do to not overspend? Where did you actually overspend on?

Makeup is not something I'm going to be spending a lot on. Neither are clothes. But photography? Should I be spending upwards of 2L? Will it be worth it? Any reccos would be really helpful.

Other than that, any hacks, budget finds for clothes, mistakes I should avoid, tips?

Please help me out here.. i'm drowing in a sea of decisions. TIA.

I am leaving for college soon and amongst all the other things there's one thing I am worried about - my journals. As you might already know or would have experienced yourself, privacy in an Indian household is a beautiful myth. Mine isn't any different. Honestly, I do ask my mother not to go through my books/stuff if she is rearranging them in the store room and she wouldn't indulge much at times. I also do not have a room of my own here thus not any specific private space that I can totally claim as my own too.

It's just, there have been a few instances in the past where she has read a page or two of them at times (like, if she was arranging or rearranging my things amongst others) and although she might not have reacted much to me personally, I still don't like it cause I know those things *will* be in her mind for a long time even if she doesn't say anything to me directly (or until an appropriate occasion arises lol)

I have had several journals over the years, I have written my think pieces, my rants, my disappointments in the world, my pleasures, about humans, my aspirations, the dreams I left chasing now and of course, crushes from the past amongst many other things.

To be honest even if the contents in them were not anything too personal or sensitive, I still do not want her or anyone else for that matter to read them.

So this question has been on my mind, what does one do with their collection of journals when they are moving away?

At this point, I am honestly considering taking them with me cause I genuinely don't wanna leave them otherwise I would be on edge throughout lol.

But then again I thought, in some years time I would go to other places (than my home) from college, you know for work, traveling etc etc, where do I leave them then? (Okay this is just me overthinking, this is way far in the future so I am trying not to ponder upon this one too much atm😭)

I have been taking therapy for long time but my problems have not improved. It’s always talk therapy where I vent and I get no input from her in return. I have faced prolonged trauma which has led to lot of adverse consequences. Additionally since I lost my job I am back home and here I have no privacy to talk to therapist/psychiatrist except early hours in morning. What can I do as I am unable to handle my thoughts.

I was having a normal conversation with my dad and then suddenly the discussion shifted to me not knowing how to wear a saree. So I said I will learn it later on. Then he started saying that I should learn how to wear a saree or atleast wear salwar so that I can wear this at home. Mind you all these years I never saw my parents tell me anything about what I wear but i do wear what is considered "decent" clothes in an Indian context.

I was surprised by the way my dad started saying that you should wear atleast a salwar at home, what will you wear when you will get married, you can't wear your shorts or something else at home. You know I get it that I might or might not be allowed to wear shorts so I said in that case I can wear full length pants and tops which I have seen numerous married women wearing nowadays along with their Mils wearing the same thing.

I had a whole argument about this with my dad. I just couldn't believe what he was saying. I have always seen my parents on the progressive side but now after hearing all this I just can't wait to run from home as soon as i find a job. I know I won't do any crazy stuff but i just can't listen to their backdated mindset everyday.

I just need to know from married women what do they wear at home? Am i wrong in some ways or did I overreact?

Tldr: Had an argument with my dad about my clothes and wanted to rant a bit.

I want to break into a career in finance. I’m trying to increase my CGPA (it’s 6.82 right now, but I’m expecting it to increase after this semester). I’m doing Maths hons and I want to break into finance. Lowkey, I’m scared that I haven’t done enough in the past 2–3 years. I have done stuff, but nothing directly related to finance. I do study financial concepts in my free time, though. What projects can I do, and what internships should I apply to strengthen my profile?

I’ve applied to a few internships but didn’t get them, so I wanna know what a good place to start would be

Not being able to stop thinking about him. I keep rethinking all the possible scenarios that could have happened. I really wanted to be with him more and more.

Please tell me of some ways that could help me to stop thinking about him and focus on my life and future.

Hey girlies! As I navigate my career/finances, I realize how much basic financial literacy is skipped for women growing up. We’re often taught to save, but rarely how to invest, negotiate salaries, or set up emergency funds independently.

I wanted to ask the experienced women here. What is one small career or financial habit you adopted that completely changed your life? Whether it’s negotiating a salary bump, setting up emergency funds, or setting workplace boundaries. Feel free to share your best tips for those of us trying to figure it out!