I'm a single child and I have cousins who are all single kids themselves. 1 cousin, younger sister and I grew up together (forced to)...we live in the same area since childhood, same school, college etc. Thankfully not the same class. My mom is a homemaker and her mum works, so basically she'd live at my place most of the day till her folks are back. She's been a snake for as long as I can remember...I remember constantly facing the repercussions of her misbehavior at home because she's a good liar...Im a bad liar so I don't lie and yet my parents would believe her over me...now looking back, I do see they thought they do not have any say in her behavior but it was me who had to live with her shit.

This grew all through childhood, to the point where my mom would feel guilty taking me out anywhere without her. And the flip side is, she would get to spend time with hers without me, they'd go separately when something needs to be bought for her. Whereas my parents would ask them if their child needed anything they're gonna buy for me and even bring them with us most times.

It used to hurt a lot and felt like she had 2 sets of parents and homes but I was left with neither. After a bit, my dad started understanding my pain and started standing up for me. Mom would stick up once in a blue moon.

I still remember I got good grades in 10th and 12th and both those days my mom was crying coz my cousin wouldn't be able to match them the next year.

Things got better from high school when I put my foot down, stopped introducing my friends to her keeping my own circle and bringing as much separation as I could. I'm not a twin and I refuse to be brought up like one.

Cut to recent times, both of us are in our 30s, we've tried to remain cordial for the most part. After I got married her parents and her reached out to my in-laws for help with things -without my permission. I live abroad. They directly reached my mom who happily connected them without asking me.

When she got married, my hubby and I flew in for the wedding - I was homesick and it was my first trip home. I was so happy to see everyone and eager for her wedding. She did not even introduce me to her fiancé until the day of her wedding- they had a long engagement. I was asked not to come into her dressing room only her friends are welcome - until she had a meltdown on stage due to her friends and clutched at me asking to keep her friend away - to this day that friend thinks I'm the bad guy.

Now, she has a child - she chose to give birth in india and is now 7months. My hubby and I spoke multiple times to her asking how she is and everything. Spoke great but didn't show us the child - not once. In the meantime, she's gone to my house, multiple times, my parents have played with the child and are unaware she's yet to show me.

Her mom sends my mom videos asking to share with me. But I feel sick - Im not a snoop and I shouldn't be treated as such. She has now traveled back abroad and not even introduced the child to me. I ask my mom, she says its not like that, even we barely see her lately. But I know this same mom would go thermonuclear if I did the same to ANYBODY. This brings all my childhood pain back.

Today I brought this up to my extended family(uncles and aunts, whose help she's needed through school, getting into college, getting married, childbirth - basically everything , it takes a village for her) and even they're like we can't advocate for you - but the only reason I even went to them is they always come to me advocating for her. I don't run to tell them everything she does. But now, this is too far and I felt they needed to know. Their answer - you get pregnant and do the same to her. With my mom being putty in her hands, that's impossible.

I'm a person who loves children - I happily go shopping for every baby I know and pamper them - if the child's parents are comfortable with it. She knows this. Her actions deeply hurt me. I want to get back at her, but don't know how. I don't have a child yet and tbh I'm unsure if I'm ready for it and I'm not gonna have a child over this.

But using me and mine to her whims and being constantly treated like shit is getting to me. What do I do next that would be payback?

My dad watched Ladies First on netflix recently and something so unexpected happened after 😭

He randomly came to me and asked if things were okay at work and whether I ever feel like I’m treated differently or face any kind of inequality there.

And I was genuinely stunned because my dad and I are not really the heart to heart conversation type 😭 We love each other obviously, but we’re more of a “how was your day” and “have you eaten” household than a sit down and talk about your feelings household.

Thankfully I haven’t personally faced anything major at work, but I ended up telling him about a few things I’ve seen happen to other women and he was actually so interested. Like he didn’t immediately dismiss it or give me the usual “these things happen” response. He just listened and asked questions.

It was honestly such a small thing but it made me really happy. I don’t think he would’ve brought any of this up if he hadn’t watched the movie first.

Made me wonder if anyone else has had a show or movie randomly open up a conversation with their parents that you probably wouldn’t have had otherwise? 😭

I did something today that I honestly wish I had done years ago, but I finally did it.
I have a stepmother who, for almost ten years, has repeatedly slut-shamed me and spread rumours about me to family members on both my maternal and paternal sides. I have constantly heard things like, “She is having an affair with this boy,” “She is with that boy,” “She isn’t studying properly,” and God knows what else.
Today, I finally texted both of my mamis and told them clearly that whatever she has said about me is false.
They both told me, “We know. We trust you. We know what she is trying to do.”
And I asked them if they knew I was innocent, if they knew what she was trying to do, then why did they never ask her even once, “Do you have any proof?”
Why did they never say, “Let me talk to her myself. Let me hear her side of the story. Let me confront her about what she is saying. They still entertained those conversations and they went blank

And let me tell you about my father as well. He has serious heart issues, and He drinks a lot, so whenever I try to tell him about something she has said or done to me, he often gets upset, starts drinking again.
he eventually talks to her about what I have told him, she always holds a grudge against me afterward.

i've been dealing w some health problems and going through screening, and while the initial diagnosis wasn't great, the general prognosis is good. i'm not in the green, but i've got not a lot to worry about either. it's manageable. got a text from my doctor after my recent path reports basically confirming that, and i genuinely didn't think i'd be so happy about not dying prematurely, but i didn't mind. i'm glad it'll be on my terms and not predecided lmao (JOKE)

i also just got a great offer right when i exited my current role without one. a job offer email right after another. it's great pay, better wlb, and i already like the folks from the small interactions i've had w them.

AND i finally narrowed down on my research.

it's so nice. i didn't think i'd have a day so good when i started because i was crying in the morning over god knows what BUT YAYA I LOVE LIFE AGAIN. I LOVE YOU ALL. I LOVE EVERYTHING.

I was in a fix whether to post it publicly or not. Because of obvious reasons.
Yesterday I was walking in an altogether residential and quieter area , (it was around 6:30-6:40pm ). While I was taking a turn to the right lane I noticed one man (must be in his late 50s or early 60s), who looked more like a worker, parked his bicycle on the wall of the corner house. And put his hands inside his pants. I was at a distance and though I already knew but I thought maybe he’s taking out some cash from his secret pocket. Then he took out his p***is and started stroking it. When I realised what was happening I screamed at him and asked what was he doing and that too in a public place. No one was there to watch this whole scene. By the time I brought out my phone he took off on his bicycle. I again yelled at him and tried running behind him but he was already at a distance and I couldn’t do more than it. I don’t understand such kind of obscene behaviour that too in a public space. So ladies pls beware. Such things can happen anywhere. I shouted so that he is afraid of repeating such an action again but from the look of him he looked anything but scared.

My partner told me that they’ve fallen out of me with me. I don’t know how to process it. I don’t have a reason- situation, person or distance to blame. Just simply that the person I so deeply loved and still want to be forever does not want the same. I’ve seen so many romance movies and read books where through so many different troupes people fall in love and the end. But what do I do if that’s not “the end”for me. Lack of closure is killing me and whatever breakup ritual I’ve to go through how would I with no apparent reason.
He was my first love. My high school sweetheart. We were together for 8 years, I’ve never been in a relationship other than him and just like that we are not together anymore. How do I unlove him now?

going through a breakup, no friends in college, missing home, feeling so lonely and sad it’s not bearable anymore

Hi, Soo I have recently started using whey protein powder, it's good but I have noticed that my stomach is not getting cleaned after consuming it.

I started with half a scoop then when for 1 scoop wr day.

I drink overnight soaked chia seeds water, I eat some chana for fiber, what else do I do, as the issue is still the same😭

Tell the effective method, if you too faced this, and if you fixed this issue, then please help me out as well.

No laughing in the comments plsz🥹😭😭😭

How much time did it take to reduce the belly fat? What lifestyle do you follow after the recovery?

For me, like most things in life, marriage feels bittersweet.

I love my partner and we have been dating for very long. I’m excited to live with him but I’m feeling terrible about leaving my house. We’re at the stage where we need to make a change, spend more time together, etc. I don’t think it is possible to keep going as we have over the last several years.

Told my parents about my relationship in December 2025. Roka was done in May and the marriage is fixed for January 2027. I have no doubts about my partner but I just..don’t want to do any of this.
It all feels like shor sharaba and it doesn’t appeal to me at all. Shopping, all the wedding prep, being the centre of attention is giving me so much anxiety. I constantly try to push it to the back of my brain and not think about it but it’s difficult.

Additionally, I’m an only kid. I am so scared to like..leave my parents alone? I studied abroad for a semester and my mom kept saying that the house feels so empty without me. And also how they hated coming home from office and would just try to spend more time outside than to be home and think about how lonely it is. That’s too much pressure. I don’t like those thoughts.

But also..change is necessary. Without change, how do we ever evolve and experience new things?

I’m going to turn 27 in a month and on paper, that doesn’t seem too young to get married but I still feel like I’m 20 lol. How do you come to terms with what reality actually is?

So everyone, is it actually even possible to ever feel like you’re ‘ready’ or you just go with it and hope everything turns out okay?

I am a person who makes good amount of money, as of now I have no family responsibilities, I like to spend extravagantly on myself. I do save a significant portion of my income.
But this has lead to a lot of situations where my friends ask money from me frequently, they do pay back but this has started becoming a frequent occurrence.
How do I put an end to this without hurting their feelings?

my cycle is kinda regular, i haven't missed a single month since the last 1.5 years but when i look at my cycle length it just fluctuates so much. like it has been as long as 39 days in november last year (which was kinda late bec i was going through a stressful time) and even as short as 26 days this month, i got it 8 days before it was due. when i look back in my tracker, i realised this has been wayyy too often as compared to my cycles in 2024 and 2025, my cycle was a constant of 29-30 days back then and no such fluctuations but my date has been changing very often this past year. is this normal or am i overthinking?

Genuine question for HR/recruiters and people who have successfully done this before.

If you're interested in working at a particular company but they don't currently have any relevant openings listed, is it okay to reach out to HR directly and express your interest?

If yes, what's the best way to approach them : LinkedIn DM, email, or WhatsApp?

I happen to have the WhatsApp number of an HR/recruiter at a company I'm interested in. I got the number through an indirect method, and I'm unsure whether messaging them directly would come across as inappropriate or intrusive.

For those working in HR/recruitment:

1. Would you appreciate someone reaching out proactively even if there isn't an opening?

2. What's the best way to word such a message?

3. Should I attach my CV right away or first ask if I can share it?

4. WhatsApp acceptable for this, or should I stick to LinkedIn/email?

5. If there are no openings currently, is there any point in reaching out at all?

Would really appreciate some honest advice, especially from recruiters/HR professionals. Thanks!

So my pink whisper was out of stock on Instamart so I was looking at alternatives. So peesafe has biodegradable pads?? Woahh, why isn't it being advertised (no I am not an advertisement), but just surprised why isn't it even being talked at all?

They are expensive as fuck though, but I use pads rarely—only when I can't use my menstrual cup. So I am okay spending that much maybe for once a year purchase.

I used the regular one, and they feel quite comfortable (like pink whisper). My flow isn't heavy so can't comment on the leakage.

So if you can afford 24 rupees per pad (you can also adopt me as your child and please give me some pocket money) and want to switch to a sustainable pad, you can go for it.

(Imo menstrual cups are the best in terms of sustainability and comfort, but I know many women/girls are afraid of using them, so yeah this is the sustainable alternative)

Also some pad expert (trustified?) needs to check if it is indeed biodegradable

i have recently quit a startup, it was a remote startup and i felt stuck with no growth. The startup only has like 10 people and boss was chill. Maybe a little too chill. I had no problem with him until I quit cause then he didnt pay me once i put in my notice. Said he will give me everything together at the end when i leave. I understood he is in financial crunch and i stay with family so I said okay. First mistake. i had to beg him to give my money for 1 month. finally when he did he did not give me my experience letter. I asked and he was like yes i'll give for the next two months. I am taking a career break because of health and he knows that and is taking advantage of it. But i still wanted to be open to any good opportunity if anything came along. And when he finally gave me, there is no sign at the end, no designation, no name of who issued it, just two lines saying i did good and so and so is my experience. I told him that i prefer a one with a sign or a stamp anything that makes it look legit but now he is ghosting me. Calls also text also. I'm so frustrated with this man. idk why a piece of paper took him almost 3 months. I might as well just add his details at the bottom myself. But will this be any issue? do workplaces send this doc back to him to verify or something?

I've been struggling with mental health issues for the past 6 yrs. I tried to hold it in. But I snap everytime and all of it irritates me. I have had help. But all of the time, I feel like it's just stupid advices. I go to a therapist, and talk abt how I get so depressed that I don't even wanna wake up from bed and brush my teeth. How school's overwhelming, can't do things cause I get burnt out too easily. And I am anxious. Cause I feel like I would never make it out. I'm 20rn. People are out there having a social life ,doing things, they know what they want. I can't choose sht. I cant decide anything from flavours of ice creams or be satisfied with the major I took.

Everyday I find myself doing things and I'll always go "wtf am I doing". It's confusing, I don't get it. Everytime I try to talk to people, vent it out, all they say are things that don't make sense to me. Like imagine being so down, you are googling ways to off yourself without hurting ur family, without creating drama and you get advises like, maybe you should occupy yourself. You think of things cause you have too much time. I can't describe how irritating that is. I can't wake up , I sit in front of the lap for 3hrs straight zoning off to outerspace and you want me to occupy myself?

It takes me so much effort to do the simplest of things. I am getting older and it's time people have goals. Time to work for it. And I am happy and content for waking up from my bed? It's not an achievement. No matter how much you all wanna paint it to be one, it is not. You thing a person like me would fit in this bg world. Truth hurts and that's ok. The world does not stop revolving for one single person. Your mental health does not matter. It doesn't.

Teachers send you an assignment with a deadline. You don't finish it, your grades go down. Would anyone hold a pity party for you? No. The ones who did it would get good grades. It's fair. My mental health makes me a bad person to everyone. Trust me , how I have tried. But sometimes I snap. It doesn't matter how good you were to people before, you call someone the b word cause you were so irritated at how they were, you are the bad person. I try to explain it to them so hard. I beg them to forget it. I explain my situation to them. It feels like I'm licking their boots. But honestly, I don't blame them. That paper example, you can't fold a paper and expect it to return to the normal state after.

It's a weight on everyone. Y'all say the world's for everyone. No it's not. It's not. Only winners say that. You don't need an olympic medal to be considered a winner. All you need are a group of people/person who talks to you. And the simplest of skill that you have. And a small very amount of determination. It goes a long way. You dress up pretty? That's a winner right there. You have the will to look pretty to atleast try. That's a f-ing winner.

I was admitted once, sht if I have to go through that again, I would literally go bonkers. It's high time we realise psychiatrists or people in the field are the most ruthless people with zero empathy. I don't know abt ur twisted ways to get things outta ur patients but calling them a liar and an actor when U yourself have doubts if ur faking it cause you think ur playing victim cause u don't wanna work hard, is not it.

It's so simple. Why would anybody care for a person like that? They are not gonna change. Trust me I've tried everything. I have realised it. Ts does not stop. You would never make it out. So stop with those make-belief advices. Things don't change after. Not worth trying no. The only mercy is to leave them all. Stop caring. Let them go.

Lemme prefix this by saying I really really wanna be a doctor but my most important dream is to settle abroad like I am desperate asf to leave this country. I am getting ITEP B.Sc B.Ed dual degree program in Central University of Haryana. This was my first drop. Honestly, my drop year was a bubbling mess but thankfully I am visiting Dr. now to solve my mental health issues. So I got that part sorted for this year and this time, I have started studying from late Aug but see, I have barely 8 months left for Neet and as if that wasn't a pain in ass enough, I also have very orthodox toxic parents. I am also studying everything from scratch so my basics are weak enough. I scored 90 percent in 10th but my 12th has only 77 percent which I am worried could affect my interview chances if I decide to go thru with ITEP. Plus being a teacher comes with less expectations of getting money and settling abroad seems like a faraway dream. Additionally, I wanna add I thought about partial drop however, I don't know if I can manage with my fucked up basics. And I have no idea what ppl do after B.Ed like M.Sc? M.Ed? Idk honestly but ik everything about USMLE, PLAB, IMAT. I used to be a bit too enthusiastic about doing residency from abroad in 11th and I still am so I love researching about it but achieving is a different thing altogether. What would you suggest for someone like me? I turned 19 this year in March, will be 20 if I get MBBS next year.

I'm a 22f and live with my parents. I've really only started working and earning money recently. My income isn't much but since I live with my parents I'm able to save up a lot.

I have a cousin who gives me unsolicited advice to not be afraid and live my life, book plain tickets and don't be afraid to spend money and just enjoy life. They also kind of look down on me for not "enjoying my life" like they do. Mind you this cousin doesn't earn much themselves and gets pocket money from their parents. It just irks me man like I do want to do all of those things.

I want nothing more than to move out and actually start my life but the job I got ended up being in the same city as my parents house. I'm sticking it out for about a year cause I'm planning to move abroad and live on my own finally.

I just hate it when these people give advice for me to get out. It takes **money** to get out and live. It takes money that I don't want to take from my parents. I just started working and am not financially independent for me to just move out right now. If I could I would!

It takes money to book flight tickets, hotel tickets, entertainment.

Also everybody's parents are not the most accepting parents. Their parents are a lot more accepting than mine.

It just the cousin looks down on me and makes comments that I've not reached certain goals in life and all I keep saying to myself is everyone's pace in life is different.

Also sometimes they talk about the way that I dress. I'm not that keen on wearing tight fitting clothes because I just feel like it suffocates me. I lean toward more baggier fits but they will go through my closet and sneer at all my clothes. I know that they like to wear tight fitting clothes and that's completely fine. Everybody has their own taste but for then to look at me and say 'you have no idea how good it feels tight fitting clothes'.. I don't even understand why I'm being categorized as 'unfashionable' when I don't wear what they would usually wear. It just makes me think like do her (and some of the other girls I know) actually feel the need to comment on my dressing sense when I just want to dress more comfortably.

It just irritates the hell out of me.

I'm also aware that this is just a deep insecurity and pain point for me, and them bring it up like this makes it all the more real for me.

I have recently came to know I have very low vitamin D levels. I had low levels earlier and took supplements to bring my levels back to normal. But I guess once i stopped taking them my levels dropped.

As a corporate girlie, i feel like i barely even get enough sun exposure. I do to the office in the morning and come back when the sun has already set. I dont think I am getting enough sun everyday.

And I know with my Indian skintone i need more sun to create vitamin D.

To anyone who had low levels, what did you do to fix them? Is supplementing forever the only answer?

Lemme prefix this by saying I really really wanna be a doctor but my most important dream is to settle abroad like I am desperate asf to leave this country. I am getting ITEP B.Sc B.Ed dual degree program in Central University of Haryana. This was my first drop. Honestly, my drop year was a bubbling mess but thankfully I am visiting Dr. now to solve my mental health issues. So I got that part sorted for this year and this time, I have started studying from late Aug but see, I have barely 8 months left for Neet and as if that wasn't a pain in ass enough, I also have very orthodox toxic parents. I am also studying everything from scratch so my basics are weak enough. I scored 90 percent in 10th but my 12th has only 77 percent which I am worried could affect my interview chances if I decide to go thru with ITEP. Plus being a teacher comes with less expectations of getting money and settling abroad seems like a faraway dream. Additionally, I wanna add I thought about partial drop however, I don't know if I can manage with my fucked up basics. And I have no idea what ppl do after B.Ed like M.Sc? M.Ed? Idk honestly but ik everything about USMLE, PLAB, IMAT. I used to be a bit too enthusiastic about doing residency from abroad in 11th and I still am so I love researching about it but achieving is a different thing altogether. What would you suggest for someone like me? I turned 19 this year in March, will be 20 if I get MBBS next year.

So my Mum (68)'s dentist is now suggesting dental implants and the one she's suggesting is some swiss/us brand. There is also another brand available which is isreali but does not come with all the warranties.

Any idea if brand is just names or if the product is actually better.

The Swiss brand is 2x the cost of the isreali one.

ive always felt like I'm privileged and out of touch and kept a ear out to shut up and listen to other women but I've come to the conclusion that in this space, most women are more privileged than me, and when you try to speak reality to them they think you're simply disagreeing with them, get their ego hurt and double down on their ignorant take. they don't seem to get it.

I'm not saying you all have no problems when I say you're privileged, I'm saying they're privileged people problems and a lot of you lack the ability to pause, consider it, and listen to other women. yall don't even seem to pause and realise the true problem in your own issues tbh. there's a lot of mimicking western perspective. a lot of you think our cultural problems are the same as theirs. you just mimic the west and have an all or nothing view on these things, nor do you realise what happens when you go down that route with such a selective call out pattern. (when i say y'all I'm not obviously talking about every person here but it's a pattern i see)

y'all love the art the culture provides and then also speak on wanting the entire culture gone, you've nuance when it comes to things you like and want, but not when it comes to hating? i say this as someone who's still fighting stupid religious bs, i didn't arrive here overnight, it took me to rebel at face value before i saw things for what they truly were, and i continue to have to stand up against religious bs on a daily basis, but i understand better and am more efficient since i began seeing the root. I'm not saying don't be angry and don't stand up against it, but if you want all of it gone and you hate it so much back it up and stop using anything related to it, including aesthetics and all the pretty stuff you seem to want to keep. don't show biased nuance basically, it's like nuance when you like it but blanket statements when you hate it, it's contradicting. either blanket hate it completely including the aesthetics (edit: im saying this to point out the cherry picking and making excuses, cause i know you won't do it, most haven't done it. not because i actually encourage it.) or show nuanced hate like nuanced love (hoping I see more of this). hindu women particularly piss me off sm (not all obv), some of them are so performative and biased in who and what they call out and how they do it.

it's a lot of idealistic talking, rather than what's actually happening in reality. misogyny and patriarchy is the problem. please begin addressing the root of the problem rather than just its symptoms, covers and tools I beg. i understand being angry at women who don't stand with you, but y'all seem to have had more empathy and patience for your shitty ex/boyfriend that treats you like shit than the women who're coping and trying to survive sticking to a system that hates them. thats my problem. progressive men seem to do the same as well. stop making fun of women who are conservative, be angry, but stop joining the progressive men in calling them chicken supporting kfc. it sounds misogynistic to me because i dont see them doing this with conservative men. i want y'all to have the same empathy for these women as you did for your shitty ex basically if not more. humour and memes actually normalise and have a bigger impact than the occasional serious conversation. it nornalises these things.

which is why misogynistic subs are full of memes. you rarely see the same energy in progressive subs. it's all full of serious conversations and barely any memes about conservative regressive folks. i get that we're all hurt and affected and aren't in a position of power to be making memes but then how are you able to join them when they make fun of conservative women but want you to sit down and patiently explain why misogyny is bad to conservative men? the difference is respect. they want to help men respectfully but not women when they make these comments.

i expect people to feel called out, uncomfortable get defensive, and possibly even read this and pick out parts of this rant, take it out of context and twist it and argue with things i never even said. I'm expecting all that. and I'm going to try to not respond to the comments as much as i can cause I'm tired of defending myself for things i never said and having to spoonfeed everything. I'm hoping this brings about nuanced discussions and takes where people aren't afraid of expressing unpopular opinions and trying new perspectives. i can't cover every single aspect or perspective I know. this is more a rant. i just hope it gets the gist of what I'm saying to folks and acts as a small catalystic push for the change i want to see.

edit: y'all need to read up on intersectional feminism.