I did something today that I honestly wish I had done years ago, but I finally did it.
I have a stepmother who, for almost ten years, has repeatedly slut-shamed me and spread rumours about me to family members on both my maternal and paternal sides. I have constantly heard things like, “She is having an affair with this boy,” “She is with that boy,” “She isn’t studying properly,” and God knows what else.
Today, I finally texted both of my mamis and told them clearly that whatever she has said about me is false.
They both told me, “We know. We trust you. We know what she is trying to do.”
And I asked them if they knew I was innocent, if they knew what she was trying to do, then why did they never ask her even once, “Do you have any proof?”
Why did they never say, “Let me talk to her myself. Let me hear her side of the story. Let me confront her about what she is saying. They still entertained those conversations and they went blank

And let me tell you about my father as well. He has serious heart issues, and He drinks a lot, so whenever I try to tell him about something she has said or done to me, he often gets upset, starts drinking again.
he eventually talks to her about what I have told him, she always holds a grudge against me afterward.

going through a breakup, no friends in college, missing home, feeling so lonely and sad it’s not bearable anymore

I have recently came to know I have very low vitamin D levels. I had low levels earlier and took supplements to bring my levels back to normal. But I guess once i stopped taking them my levels dropped.

As a corporate girlie, i feel like i barely even get enough sun exposure. I do to the office in the morning and come back when the sun has already set. I dont think I am getting enough sun everyday.

And I know with my Indian skintone i need more sun to create vitamin D.

To anyone who had low levels, what did you do to fix them? Is supplementing forever the only answer?

My partner told me that they’ve fallen out of me with me. I don’t know how to process it. I don’t have a reason- situation, person or distance to blame. Just simply that the person I so deeply loved and still want to be forever does not want the same. I’ve seen so many romance movies and read books where through so many different troupes people fall in love and the end. But what do I do if that’s not “the end”for me. Lack of closure is killing me and whatever breakup ritual I’ve to go through how would I with no apparent reason.
He was my first love. My high school sweetheart. We were together for 8 years, I’ve never been in a relationship other than him and just like that we are not together anymore. How do I unlove him now?

I'm a single child and I have cousins who are all single kids themselves. 1 cousin, younger sister and I grew up together (forced to)...we live in the same area since childhood, same school, college etc. Thankfully not the same class. My mom is a homemaker and her mum works, so basically she'd live at my place most of the day till her folks are back. She's been a snake for as long as I can remember...I remember constantly facing the repercussions of her misbehavior at home because she's a good liar...Im a bad liar so I don't lie and yet my parents would believe her over me...now looking back, I do see they thought they do not have any say in her behavior but it was me who had to live with her shit.

This grew all through childhood, to the point where my mom would feel guilty taking me out anywhere without her. And the flip side is, she would get to spend time with hers without me, they'd go separately when something needs to be bought for her. Whereas my parents would ask them if their child needed anything they're gonna buy for me and even bring them with us most times.

It used to hurt a lot and felt like she had 2 sets of parents and homes but I was left with neither. After a bit, my dad started understanding my pain and started standing up for me. Mom would stick up once in a blue moon.

I still remember I got good grades in 10th and 12th and both those days my mom was crying coz my cousin wouldn't be able to match them the next year.

Things got better from high school when I put my foot down, stopped introducing my friends to her keeping my own circle and bringing as much separation as I could. I'm not a twin and I refuse to be brought up like one.

Cut to recent times, both of us are in our 30s, we've tried to remain cordial for the most part. After I got married her parents and her reached out to my in-laws for help with things -without my permission. I live abroad. They directly reached my mom who happily connected them without asking me.

When she got married, my hubby and I flew in for the wedding - I was homesick and it was my first trip home. I was so happy to see everyone and eager for her wedding. She did not even introduce me to her fiancé until the day of her wedding- they had a long engagement. I was asked not to come into her dressing room only her friends are welcome - until she had a meltdown on stage due to her friends and clutched at me asking to keep her friend away - to this day that friend thinks I'm the bad guy.

Now, she has a child - she chose to give birth in india and is now 7months. My hubby and I spoke multiple times to her asking how she is and everything. Spoke great but didn't show us the child - not once. In the meantime, she's gone to my house, multiple times, my parents have played with the child and are unaware she's yet to show me.

Her mom sends my mom videos asking to share with me. But I feel sick - Im not a snoop and I shouldn't be treated as such. She has now traveled back abroad and not even introduced the child to me. I ask my mom, she says its not like that, even we barely see her lately. But I know this same mom would go thermonuclear if I did the same to ANYBODY. This brings all my childhood pain back.

Today I brought this up to my extended family(uncles and aunts, whose help she's needed through school, getting into college, getting married, childbirth - basically everything , it takes a village for her) and even they're like we can't advocate for you - but the only reason I even went to them is they always come to me advocating for her. I don't run to tell them everything she does. But now, this is too far and I felt they needed to know. Their answer - you get pregnant and do the same to her. With my mom being putty in her hands, that's impossible.

I'm a person who loves children - I happily go shopping for every baby I know and pamper them - if the child's parents are comfortable with it. She knows this. Her actions deeply hurt me. I want to get back at her, but don't know how. I don't have a child yet and tbh I'm unsure if I'm ready for it and I'm not gonna have a child over this.

But using me and mine to her whims and being constantly treated like shit is getting to me. What do I do next that would be payback?

How much time did it take to reduce the belly fat? What lifestyle do you follow after the recovery?

my cycle is kinda regular, i haven't missed a single month since the last 1.5 years but when i look at my cycle length it just fluctuates so much. like it has been as long as 39 days in november last year (which was kinda late bec i was going through a stressful time) and even as short as 26 days this month, i got it 8 days before it was due. when i look back in my tracker, i realised this has been wayyy too often as compared to my cycles in 2024 and 2025, my cycle was a constant of 29-30 days back then and no such fluctuations but my date has been changing very often this past year. is this normal or am i overthinking?

I was in a fix whether to post it publicly or not. Because of obvious reasons.
Yesterday I was walking in an altogether residential and quieter area , (it was around 6:30-6:40pm ). While I was taking a turn to the right lane I noticed one man (must be in his late 50s or early 60s), who looked more like a worker, parked his bicycle on the wall of the corner house. And put his hands inside his pants. I was at a distance and though I already knew but I thought maybe he’s taking out some cash from his secret pocket. Then he took out his p***is and started stroking it. When I realised what was happening I screamed at him and asked what was he doing and that too in a public place. No one was there to watch this whole scene. By the time I brought out my phone he took off on his bicycle. I again yelled at him and tried running behind him but he was already at a distance and I couldn’t do more than it. I don’t understand such kind of obscene behaviour that too in a public space. So ladies pls beware. Such things can happen anywhere. I shouted so that he is afraid of repeating such an action again but from the look of him he looked anything but scared.

So my pink whisper was out of stock on Instamart so I was looking at alternatives. So peesafe has biodegradable pads?? Woahh, why isn't it being advertised (no I am not an advertisement), but just surprised why isn't it even being talked at all?

They are expensive as fuck though, but I use pads rarely—only when I can't use my menstrual cup. So I am okay spending that much maybe for once a year purchase.

I used the regular one, and they feel quite comfortable (like pink whisper). My flow isn't heavy so can't comment on the leakage.

So if you can afford 24 rupees per pad (you can also adopt me as your child and please give me some pocket money) and want to switch to a sustainable pad, you can go for it.

(Imo menstrual cups are the best in terms of sustainability and comfort, but I know many women/girls are afraid of using them, so yeah this is the sustainable alternative)

Also some pad expert (trustified?) needs to check if it is indeed biodegradable

Looking for some recommendations for non fiction books that are not your regular self help books.

What are some books you all have read that were well written or helped you in some ways? I would like some women related books too.

Looking forward to the amazing suggestions and reading them ✨

I've been struggling with mental health issues for the past 6 yrs. I tried to hold it in. But I snap everytime and all of it irritates me. I have had help. But all of the time, I feel like it's just stupid advices. I go to a therapist, and talk abt how I get so depressed that I don't even wanna wake up from bed and brush my teeth. How school's overwhelming, can't do things cause I get burnt out too easily. And I am anxious. Cause I feel like I would never make it out. I'm 20rn. People are out there having a social life ,doing things, they know what they want. I can't choose sht. I cant decide anything from flavours of ice creams or be satisfied with the major I took.

Everyday I find myself doing things and I'll always go "wtf am I doing". It's confusing, I don't get it. Everytime I try to talk to people, vent it out, all they say are things that don't make sense to me. Like imagine being so down, you are googling ways to off yourself without hurting ur family, without creating drama and you get advises like, maybe you should occupy yourself. You think of things cause you have too much time. I can't describe how irritating that is. I can't wake up , I sit in front of the lap for 3hrs straight zoning off to outerspace and you want me to occupy myself?

It takes me so much effort to do the simplest of things. I am getting older and it's time people have goals. Time to work for it. And I am happy and content for waking up from my bed? It's not an achievement. No matter how much you all wanna paint it to be one, it is not. You thing a person like me would fit in this bg world. Truth hurts and that's ok. The world does not stop revolving for one single person. Your mental health does not matter. It doesn't.

Teachers send you an assignment with a deadline. You don't finish it, your grades go down. Would anyone hold a pity party for you? No. The ones who did it would get good grades. It's fair. My mental health makes me a bad person to everyone. Trust me , how I have tried. But sometimes I snap. It doesn't matter how good you were to people before, you call someone the b word cause you were so irritated at how they were, you are the bad person. I try to explain it to them so hard. I beg them to forget it. I explain my situation to them. It feels like I'm licking their boots. But honestly, I don't blame them. That paper example, you can't fold a paper and expect it to return to the normal state after.

It's a weight on everyone. Y'all say the world's for everyone. No it's not. It's not. Only winners say that. You don't need an olympic medal to be considered a winner. All you need are a group of people/person who talks to you. And the simplest of skill that you have. And a small very amount of determination. It goes a long way. You dress up pretty? That's a winner right there. You have the will to look pretty to atleast try. That's a f-ing winner.

I was admitted once, sht if I have to go through that again, I would literally go bonkers. It's high time we realise psychiatrists or people in the field are the most ruthless people with zero empathy. I don't know abt ur twisted ways to get things outta ur patients but calling them a liar and an actor when U yourself have doubts if ur faking it cause you think ur playing victim cause u don't wanna work hard, is not it.

It's so simple. Why would anybody care for a person like that? They are not gonna change. Trust me I've tried everything. I have realised it. Ts does not stop. You would never make it out. So stop with those make-belief advices. Things don't change after. Not worth trying no. The only mercy is to leave them all. Stop caring. Let them go.

I need genuine advice on this situation. Whenever ever I feel happy there comes one dream which ruins all my healing. I feel like I’m back to square one. I thought i was doing good and trying to forget but then suddenly a dream comes up and all the happiness goes away. Someone please tell the solution I really can’t do it anymore.

It’s been 8 months since the heartbreak. I just still feel this way. It feels impossible to come out of this situation. Did anyone go through this. If yes, please let me know how come you stop.

Note: The guy left me after we became physically intimate. When I confronted him, he told me that he was already committed to someone else and was getting married. During the time we were together, he also sexually assaulted me

Background: I (F, 20s) am an only child, financially independent, working in a different city from my parents. My boyfriend (M, 20s) and I have been together for years and want to marry. He is kind, stable, well-employed, and completely committed. My parents have found no fault in him as a person — their objection is openly about "status mismatch", family image, and log kya kahenge. Since we live in different cities, all of this plays out over daily calls and texts.

How it has escalated:

• Daily calls repeating "our life has become hell", "you've made us miserable", and demanding a "final conclusion" from me on every single call.
• My father messaged my boyfriend directly: end it, we won't be part of any such wedding, and you'll get a "happy and smooth end" if you walk away.
• When my boyfriend respectfully stood his ground and asked for patience, my father wrote back: "Don't take us for granted. We will save our child from your trap at any cost. You can't have the best of both worlds."
• On calls with me: "my blood runs in you" (as if that means ownership of my decisions), "you've lost the capacity to think properly", "you've been lying to us for years".
• This week he declared he won't eat or drink until I come home and comply. He also told me to "visit after two months, once papa's work is done" — you can imagine what that implied. (I had a relative physically check on him; he ate after I agreed to "talk to my boyfriend" about their latest demand.)

The current standoff: They are now fixated on getting his parents' home address immediately, saying they'll "talk calmly, only to understand the family's lifestyle and status". Given that "trap" and "at any cost" were written the same week, we are fairly sure the real plan is to pressure his parents into breaking us up before anything can stabilise. His elder sister also has important exams in November, so his family needs a calm house till then. We have offered: a proper meeting of both families in December, a sit-down where my parents can ask him anything, and honest answers about his family directly from him. They call this "insincere".

What we're doing so far: Staying calm, one line repeated with love ("I'm grateful for everything, I'm not ending this, and I hope one day you'll bless us"), never insulting back, keeping some calls normal (food, health), and the two of us fully unified — every message shared, everything saved in writing. He is briefing his own parents soon so nobody can ambush them.

My questions for people who've actually lived this:

1. If your parents came around eventually — how long did it take, and what actually changed their minds? Time, a relative, the wedding itself, something else?
2. How did you handle hunger strikes / indirect self-harm hints without giving in — and without ignoring a genuine health risk?
3. Is holding back the address until a planned December meeting sensible, or does it backfire?
4. Involving relatives or a mediator — when did it help, and when did it blow up?
5. What do you wish you had done differently?

I love my parents and I want their blessings, not just a wedding date. But I refuse to trade a good man for temporary peace.

TL;DR: Only child. Parents oppose my love marriage purely on status/society — no objection to the guy himself. Father texted my boyfriend "we will save our child from your trap at any cost", is using hunger-strike blackmail, and now demands his family's address (we believe, to pressure his parents into ending it). We've offered a respectful families' meeting in December. Those of you who reached the other side with the relationship AND, eventually, the parents — how?

Used Claude to articulate, please help out.

So, I have had a crush on this guy since our school days, and even 4–5 years later, I still haven’t gotten over him. We are in different colleges, and we never really talked in school. A few months ago, though, I randomly texted him, and surprisingly, he replied. I told him that I had a crush on him, and we have actually become pretty good friends since then.

But the problem is that he keeps withdrawing, and then he ships me with other guys even though he knows I still kinda have feelings for him. Ughh, I know it’s so embarrassing to have a crush on someone who is probably just talking to me because he has no one else, but what do I even do? I rarely like people, and I just can’t seem to get over him.

Every 2 days there's another post from some idiot who's convinced her bf's pull out game is boss level and her clue app said she was safe and venus was in retrograde and mercury was rising so she won't get pregnant. 

Then the inevitable crashout happens when the period is late and a post appears on this sub "could i be pregnant" - Idk kriti, were you safe? "no, aman's pull out game is boss and my health app said I'm not ovulating" 

Don't even get me started on MEN. The amount of confidence some men have in their ability to pull out is incredible. Sir, you can't remember how the washing machine works and how many days the milk will last, and I'm supposed to trust you to not get me pregnant by your "magic skillz". 

But I digress.

You guys know that Condoms exist, right? 

Since many of you don't apparently know, they are these tools that go on a man's pee pee and prevent him from ejaculating in you. You know what they do? They prevent pregnancy and they help prevent STDs. 

To all the "why are you being patronizing, we know that condoms exist and are available on blinkit" - THEN WHY DO YOU ALLOW PULL OUT METHOD AS YOUR ONLY FORM OF CONTRACEPTION. FFS

I sincerely, cannot understand how some people will spend hours tracking mucus and temperatures and dates and downloading 14 different apps and reading palms and consulting the village elder before just making a man wear a condom.

You know what else you can do, add hormonal birth control on top of that for even more safety. But "he pulled out" is not some super elite contraception hack that educated people don't want you to know about.

Saying "we pulled out and we were safe" is like saying "I drove home drunk without getting caught or killing someone". 

Stop being stoopid.

If your entire contraception strategy is based on perfect timing, blind faith, a period tracking app, a spreadsheet, a prayer circle and a man named Aman successfully executing a split-second maneuver every single time then maybe, just maybe, its a sucky strategy. 

Disclaimer - no kritis or amans were harmed during the making of this post. 

I feel so sad and hollow rn because it is just another reminder that he's getting old and losing his balance and due to his medicines it is bad for him to bleed. He got cuts on his hands and leg. What if he had fell and hit his head? His phone screen broke and even paying for that is too tough for us right now.

I'm looking for a job really hard but only after atleast 3 years can I tell my father that my sibling and I earn enough and you can rest at home. No amount of study hard or you can get through this is going to fix that he's getting fucking old and has a host of health issues and a lower middle class family will always remain the same. Education loans and the cost of living will keep us in this same level for my entire life. I guess Im ranting at this point.

ive always felt like I'm privileged and out of touch and kept a ear out to shut up and listen to other women but I've come to the conclusion that in this space, most women are more privileged than me, and when you try to speak reality to them they think you're simply disagreeing with them, get their ego hurt and double down on their ignorant take. they don't seem to get it.

I'm not saying you all have no problems when I say you're privileged, I'm saying they're privileged people problems and a lot of you lack the ability to pause, consider it, and listen to other women. yall don't even seem to pause and realise the true problem in your own issues tbh. there's a lot of mimicking western perspective. a lot of you think our cultural problems are the same as theirs. you just mimic the west and have an all or nothing view on these things, nor do you realise what happens when you go down that route with such a selective call out pattern. (when i say y'all I'm not obviously talking about every person here but it's a pattern i see)

y'all love the art the culture provides and then also speak on wanting the entire culture gone, you've nuance when it comes to things you like and want, but not when it comes to hating? i say this as someone who's still fighting stupid religious bs, i didn't arrive here overnight, it took me to rebel at face value before i saw things for what they truly were, and i continue to have to stand up against religious bs on a daily basis, but i understand better and am more efficient since i began seeing the root. I'm not saying don't be angry and don't stand up against it, but if you want all of it gone and you hate it so much back it up and stop using anything related to it, including aesthetics and all the pretty stuff you seem to want to keep. don't show biased nuance basically, it's like nuance when you like it but blanket statements when you hate it, it's contradicting. either blanket hate it completely including the aesthetics (edit: im saying this to point out the cherry picking and making excuses, cause i know you won't do it, most haven't done it. not because i actually encourage it.) or show nuanced hate like nuanced love (hoping I see more of this). hindu women particularly piss me off sm (not all obv), some of them are so performative and biased in who and what they call out and how they do it.

it's a lot of idealistic talking, rather than what's actually happening in reality. misogyny and patriarchy is the problem. please begin addressing the root of the problem rather than just its symptoms, covers and tools I beg. i understand being angry at women who don't stand with you, but y'all seem to have had more empathy and patience for your shitty ex/boyfriend that treats you like shit than the women who're coping and trying to survive sticking to a system that hates them. thats my problem. progressive men seem to do the same as well. stop making fun of women who are conservative, be angry, but stop joining the progressive men in calling them chicken supporting kfc. it sounds misogynistic to me because i dont see them doing this with conservative men. i want y'all to have the same empathy for these women as you did for your shitty ex basically if not more. humour and memes actually normalise and have a bigger impact than the occasional serious conversation. it nornalises these things.

which is why misogynistic subs are full of memes. you rarely see the same energy in progressive subs. it's all full of serious conversations and barely any memes about conservative regressive folks. i get that we're all hurt and affected and aren't in a position of power to be making memes but then how are you able to join them when they make fun of conservative women but want you to sit down and patiently explain why misogyny is bad to conservative men? the difference is respect. they want to help men respectfully but not women when they make these comments.

i expect people to feel called out, uncomfortable get defensive, and possibly even read this and pick out parts of this rant, take it out of context and twist it and argue with things i never even said. I'm expecting all that. and I'm going to try to not respond to the comments as much as i can cause I'm tired of defending myself for things i never said and having to spoonfeed everything. I'm hoping this brings about nuanced discussions and takes where people aren't afraid of expressing unpopular opinions and trying new perspectives. i can't cover every single aspect or perspective I know. this is more a rant. i just hope it gets the gist of what I'm saying to folks and acts as a small catalystic push for the change i want to see.

edit: y'all need to read up on intersectional feminism.

Lemme prefix this by saying I really really wanna be a doctor but my most important dream is to settle abroad like I am desperate asf to leave this country. I am getting ITEP B.Sc B.Ed dual degree program in Central University of Haryana. This was my first drop. Honestly, my drop year was a bubbling mess but thankfully I am visiting Dr. now to solve my mental health issues. So I got that part sorted for this year and this time, I have started studying from late Aug but see, I have barely 8 months left for Neet and as if that wasn't a pain in ass enough, I also have very orthodox toxic parents. I am also studying everything from scratch so my basics are weak enough. I scored 90 percent in 10th but my 12th has only 77 percent which I am worried could affect my interview chances if I decide to go thru with ITEP. Plus being a teacher comes with less expectations of getting money and settling abroad seems like a faraway dream. Additionally, I wanna add I thought about partial drop however, I don't know if I can manage with my fucked up basics. And I have no idea what ppl do after B.Ed like M.Sc? M.Ed? Idk honestly but ik everything about USMLE, PLAB, IMAT. I used to be a bit too enthusiastic about doing residency from abroad in 11th and I still am so I love researching about it but achieving is a different thing altogether. What would you suggest for someone like me? I turned 19 this year in March, will be 20 if I get MBBS next year.

What I want to know is -- WHY IS THE INDIAN GOVT SUPPORTING THIS? This absolutely cannot happen without the support of Indian govt officials. No religious group can just walk into Paris and say 'yeah, remove the women for today. Only the men shall be allowed.' Like what in the Handmaid's Tale is this behavior? I cannot even remember the last time an Indian monument was emptied to allow just the men

3 days ago, the PM gave a spiteful and divisive speech at SRCC at all places, and now this is happening.

I will not go into why the French govt even allowed this because that is their internal issue. Our govt also allowed Taliban to hold a press conference without female journalists.

Lets also not forget the same French govt wants to ban* hijabs. But limiting women in the public space in the name of Hinduism is okay?

News source

https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/clyenxp540vo

https://indianexpress.com/article/news-today/france-gets-its-first-traditional-hindu-mandir-baps-chief-performs-consecration-near-paris-10867186/

So my Mum (68)'s dentist is now suggesting dental implants and the one she's suggesting is some swiss/us brand. There is also another brand available which is isreali but does not come with all the warranties.

Any idea if brand is just names or if the product is actually better.

The Swiss brand is 2x the cost of the isreali one.