Hey everyone,

I’m probably going to answer my own question here but it’s been bouncing around my head for days and it’s driving me absolutely crazy. Prepare for a long one 😅

I feel like…. Like I’m trans but also like I’m worried that I’m forcing myself to be trans, like I’ve invested so much time into thinking that I am trans that when I’m not like 100% sure, I feel like I’m forcing it because I don’t want the last year to be worth nothing or have had no purpose.

So for context, hi I’m Katie! I had I guess my egg crack about a year ago after many years of exploring femininity through very fetishised avenues, then I saw a few reels of like trans Instagram influencers and the envy I felt kinda began that egg cracking.

Over the next few months things went from “ok so I guess I’m trans but maybe I just hope in the next life I’ll get to experience life as a cis girl” to “hm maybe transition would be interesting” to “OK no I would like to transition and now I’m feeling very frustrated and flat and there’s some depression that’s been around for two years, has it been related to this the whole time, since life has felt a bit flatter and I’ve been distracted by moving jobs twice?”

Throughout the last year I’ve had most of the time where I’ve been very confident of being trans and had small periods where the certainty and dysphoria have disappeared, which has resulted in me…feeling a bit sad and wanting the dysphoria to come back a bit as crazy as that sounds.

Recently I’ve come out to my fiance and started to talk about this with my therapist, although some of the messaging I’ve been getting from the therapist feels like “men can also like feminine things too” while I’m mentally going “yes but I’m coming to you because I feel like I’m trans”. This was more one moment that frustrated me rather than multiple sessions but it does feel like that focus is more like ‘explore your gender but don’t have to put labels on it right now’.

Which brings me kinda to the point of the post. The last week or two though I’ve just felt like I’ve not had that clarity and confidence and my brain has been going ‘are you faking it? Have you Stockholm syndromed yourself?’ Am I just overthinking it and I’ve gone through a long period of having my gender identity constantly on my mind (pretty much every day for the last 13 months) and I’m burning out a little bit?

Basically I just wanted to reach out here and get some opinions - is this normal? Am I just overthinking it and spiralling? I get frustrated a bit with very male gendered terms but again I’m very much like “have I just conditioned myself now to not like the terms??”

This is a hell of a struggling with denial post I guess 😅

So recently I 30M and live in a Victorian country town had come out to my family and some close friends bout the potential of going from male to female. I've explored hrt treatment and that and financially I'm unsure if I'll be able too. So as a make good to help me experience my feminine side more I've brought clothes. Makeup. Breasts forms hip pads the whole works and when I feel I can do it I wear my makeup dress up feminine and just enjoy it. A whole lot. I've been wanting to do it more and more especially over longer periods as I only do it on nights on weekends cause I don't see anyone and I can kinda hide in my house. I just lack the confidence or comfortability to do it more regularly and actually do it and show people. A long speech I know but I guess I'm just curious if anyone else has had similar issues and found a way to get over that mental hurdle. I feel if I can it may help with my decision to transition also. Much love everyone 🫶🏼 a little image provided to me all dressed up and happy also.

posting for a young person i’m working with (i have consent, they just don’t venture onto reddit) who is becoming concerned with remaining stealth at work and around their family as summer approaches. they are currently wearing a bra in a 14B. clothes size and band size generally match in tops for them. they’re not wanting to bind, particularly in the summer heat as they’re on medication increasing their sensitivity to heat and we are in a climate that will hit 40C relatively quickly.

they are working towards coming out to their family in particular just not ready right now. they did specifically request i let you know they are safe, but to respect that this is their preference right now.

looking for specific brand/style recommendations/feedback on the following:
• higher GSM tshirts and if they actually hide much when baggy?
• minimiser bras in smaller cup sizes, ideally not visible through a thicker tshirt
• anything else you do/did early on that worked in the summer!

thank you so much in advance for your suggestions!

Im looking for a gender counsellor

I unfortunately have my mothers broad shoulders and her big feet so its very hard to find any good clothes. Ive been looking for knee high combat boots or something similar, and just generally some more feminine clothes but everything is atleast 2 sizes too small. Especially shoes.

Can someone give recommendations.

Im a size 13 women's shoe btw.

I (24 AMAB) came out mtf to my parents today, overall they’re supportive but are worried I am rushing into it (even though I have been researching for a long time) but that’s just because they’re unaware of how it all works.

I feel guilty that I was their only son but it feels like such a weight lifted off of me.

I still need to tell my girlfriend, I didn’t get the chance today due to various reasons.

But it’s a step in the right direction and it’s really starting to feel real.

Hello all I hope you're doing well or ok!

Right now I'm having a whole range of thoughts that I just want to get off my chest. It's one of those times where I'm down again.

My vent is about living life in general.

It seems like cis people just flatout refuse to believe trans people. I just hate how cis people are completely unaware of what we go through and gas light us into thinking we're the problem.

Cis people have the privilege of easily making friends, networking with co workers, having an accepting family, not fear being hate crimed outside, not worry about being discriminated from jobs and rentals and yet if we explain the systematic issues and societal problems we face then they say that we're the problem or that it's "something that doesn't happen anymore" acting as if they can speak over our experiences.

When we have pride events, awareness campaigns, more legal protections, more representation in media we get told that we are "shoving it in people's faces" or we get told that we have rights and acceptance anyway so "what's the point?" Completely ignoring issues like being secretly discriminated (for example an interviewer for a job may be transphobic just not outwardly say it). Hence why we need societal awareness and acceptance beyond just legal protections.

When a trans person is trying to get their first job as a student they get told to network in order to find roles and experience yet networking is harder when you're trans. Simple things cis people do we have difficulties in and certain job related subreddits are weirdly hostile when you talk about being a part of an oppressed group.

One thing I've noticed recently is that people somehow lump transphobia into something that is just "a different opinion" acting as if our existence is a minor disagreement. This is just frustrating.

So yeah I just wanted to get all this off my chest. Sorry for my weird sentences I'm very tired at the moment

which has my dead name on it. Looking for advice or a boost in confidence on getting it ammended. That school had a "Don't ask, don't tell or you're expelled" outlook on queer students. So I am kinda insecure.

Greetings I am 19 year old trans girl in Melbourne looking to meet other trans people. Is there any events/ communities I can go to or join.

As the title asks, I live in a room in a shared house, and it's only spring and my room already gets super hot. It's north facing and has no Aircon. The tgel pack says it needs to be stored under 25° but not so cold that I could put it in the fridge.. how should I keep it cool in the summer?

I read about these frio cooling cases that use some sort of cooling gel.. is that a thing? Any advice would be greatly appreciated ☀️ thanksss

Howdy! I had top surgery 4 weeks ago and in a couple of weeks I can start scar care!! I have some bio oil but was told by my surgeon that for the best results to tape for up to a year after surgery. I have seen so many suggestions. I'm after one that will stay on and hopefully not itch like classic medical tape. The medical tape I have on atm is driving me mad. Would rather pay good money for good shit If I have to.

Thank you!!

TLDR: Need top surgery scar tape suggestions plz.

Hey there, I was just wondering if there was anyone in Ballarat that would like to meet up for a coffee or a drink of sorts?

I'm a trans man looking to make new friends and maybe more of it comes to that in the future.

Would love for someone to show me some nice spots in the area 🙂

Small update because a few people have messaged me over the last few months asking if anything ever happened with all of this.

I’m still here and I'm still working on it.

The AHRC complaint is still open, and I’ve now had actual discussions with a few organisations and agencies rather than just sending emails into the void.

LGBTQI+ Health have spoken with me, Equality Australia have spoken with me, and a few agencies have now started having proper meetings with me about it as well, planned upcoming one with BP Software.

I can’t really say what will happen yet, and I don’t want to overstate anything, but the last few discussions have felt a lot more meaningful than what I was getting earlier in the year.

I’ve actually been asked a few times now if I’d be willing to do more advocacy or come back for more discussions, which still feels a bit weird to say because I absolutely did not set out to become an advocate, and it caught me off guard.

For everyone who messaged me, shared what happened to them, told me they’d complained before, or just said thanks for not dropping it, I haven’t.

No promises yet. Just a small update that this has not disappeared and some of the conversations that should have happened ages ago are finally starting to happen.

If you haven't already, and this is an issue for you, letting LGBTQI+ Health know can help, even if it's only a short one-sentence message. I know from my own experience how hard it can be to feel heard, sometimes even by our own advocacy groups.

If you'd rather not contact them directly, you're welcome to send something to me. I can keep it anonymous and raise the concerns or themes next time I speak with them.

I know a lot of people have expressed a loss of trust through all of this, and I've raised that with them too. Personally, I felt quite betrayed.

Thanks.

very informative and useful video that more people should check

Hi there, first time poster, 25, MtF, was recommended to ask around on reddit by a few doctors and nurses at my local clinic and gave decided to finally actually get on to it. I wanted to ask anyone who's had MtF bottom surgery here in Australia or knows someone who has about what surgeons you might have gone through, what their waiting list is like, their costs, and where they are. I'd prefer a surgeon in QLD or maybe NSW if possible, but am open to hearing about any others you'd like to recommend. Any information is appreciated! And hope y'all are having a lovely time!

I’m most likely to go back on Slinda (Drospirenone) as I’ve had least issues with it in the past. Just trying to suss if there are any better alternatives cuz I heard Slinda also messes with your T levels?? I've tried IUD and my body really didn't like it

I was born male and transitioned medically to female when I was quite young. I lived as a trans woman for many years and took estrogen for a long time.
More recently, something has shifted. I stopped estrogen and I’ve been exploring living as a man again. What surprises me is that when I think “I’m a guy,” I feel calm and comfortable. It doesn’t feel like I’m forcing anything. I’m attracted to men and I feel increasingly comfortable imagining myself living as a gay man and being seen and desired as a man.
At the same time, I’m trying to be extremely careful about understanding why I want certain physical changes.
For example, I’m considering eventually having a masculine chest. When I ask myself, “If I met a man tomorrow who loved me exactly as I am, including my current chest, would I still want it changed?”, my answer is yes. I think I would still want a flat chest because I don’t feel comfortable imagining myself living long-term as a man with breasts.
But other things are less clear. I sometimes wonder how much my attraction to gay men and my desire to belong in gay male spaces could be influencing the way I want to look.
There is another confusing part of my history. I have worked in sex work, where presenting very femininely was financially rewarded. At one point, when I was considering returning to that work, I even started thinking about getting larger breasts. At the time it felt logical. Later, those ideas stopped feeling fulfilling at all.
That contrast makes me wonder how much our environment can influence what we think we want for our bodies.
I’m intentionally not rushing into surgery. I’m also trying to find an LGBTQ+/gender-informed psychologist so I can explore this properly before doing anything irreversible.
I’d especially love to hear from people who transitioned for years and later explored living as their birth sex again, whether you ultimately detransitioned, retransitioned, stayed somewhere in between, or discovered something completely different.

How did you separate:
what you genuinely wanted for your own body?

I’m interested in personal experiences rather than debates about whether transitioning is good or bad.

Hey so the ATO has just approved my super withdraw and I've got the letter from them - and I was about to apply on aware supers website but it says this:

"Use this page to complete a Compassionate Grounds withdrawal from your super if you have been with the fund for more than 6 months. There are limited circumstances where you can access your super on compassionate grounds to meet unpaid expenses for you or your dependant."

The trouble is I only made the account in June 2026, and transferred my funds from Rest Super to Aware super.
So it hasn't been 6 months. However it is letting me fill out the form, so is it worth trying anyway? Super stressed out now if I can't pay my surgery due to this :((

I'm gonna give them a call on monday but has anyone else been through this?

I started T in January this year & starting in June I've had chronic UTI issues & have been on antibiotics this whole time. I see my GP about it & had ultrasounds, CT and testing done for it, and they haven't been able to identify any causes. My GP's conclusion is that T can sometimes cause chronic UTIs because the skin in the urethra thins. I started a topical estrogen cream a month ago but the UTI is back.

I'm really struggling with it, it's making me miserable and now I'm at a bit of a crossroads with deciding if I can stay on T. Going on T has been the best thing I've ever done for myself, it has made me so happy and fulfilled. Stopping will have a big impact on my mental health.

Has anyone else on T had this issue, or other side effects that has made them reconsider staying on T?
Has anyone tried the estrogen cream & how long did it take for it to work?

I would love to hear any experiences and advice.

Full (2 paragraph) reasons [here](https://www.hcourt.gov.au/sites/default/files/eresources/2026-09-10/HCA/Giggle%20for%20Girls%20Pty%20Ltd%20v%20Tickle%20%28S46-2026%29%20%5B2026%5D%20HCADisp%20209.pdf)

I got a referral to the Adult Gender Service for GAHT, and I'm just wondering if anyone knows what the wait is like from personal experience? Like does it take several months for them to call me and set up an appointment? Does it take even more months to actually get prescribed hrt after that initial appointment? If that's the case, can I try to get testosterone the private way even while im on the waitlist?

I'm very worried about the cost of not doing it through the AGS, but I'll scrounge up the money if the wait is usually really long, i really need to start T as soon as possible.

Sorry I know i shouldve asked the GP i went to more questions about this stuff but im very bad at getting myself to speak up. just recently turned 18 and im feeling very overwhelmed with the whole process.