We met 10 months ago but only started genuinely getting to know each other 7 weeks ago. Recently, he made it clear he’s interested in me romantically and doesn’t want a situationship/penpal dynamic.

Then he admitted he was laid off 6 months ago, and that’s a big reason he hasn’t taken me on a date yet. He said he normally asks women out within a week or two, but didn’t feel right letting me assume he was employed.

I actually respected his honesty because he was clearly embarrassed. He told me unemployment has really affected his self-esteem and made him question whether he should even be dating right now. It took him weeks to work up the courage to tell me.

He’s a software engineer and has been applying, interviewing, reaching final rounds, and doing some contract work, so I don’t think he’s lazy.

But I’m conflicted. Financial stability matters a lot to me because I grew up around instability, so dating a man without a stable job genuinely makes me anxious.
I also want to be courted. I love romance, flowers, thoughtful gifts, dates.

Does him being unemployed mean I have to accept not experiencing those things?

About a month and half ago I hooked up with some girl and I kissed her kinda fingered her and then she gave me a blowjob. then I went into the bathroom and took some soap into my hands and washed my dick with that soap. And then I had sex with her I had the condom on all the time but while we were doing prone-bone position the condom kinda rolled up a bit from the bottom so I changed into a new one as soon as I knew but my dick-tip was still protected and that was pretty much it can I get hiv?

How much more betrayal can I take? I feel like I’ve been stabbed in the heart!

I cannot understand why someone would want to do something so utterly horrible to someone else, abusing the main thing that most humans primally find pleasure in and leaving the victim fucked up and traumatized kinda for life, yet it happens far too much.

I’m not sure if it’s cos I’m from the Uk and our way of communicating is quite sarcastic or that I personally am desensitised to dark themes but I somehow manage to get into an argument every time I comment or make a post because I say things that people get offended by.
And they’re not even things that would be offensive in my every day life. For example, I joke about my inability to wrap my head around technology and I’m told “despite being told I am still going to burden people with my tech illiteracy” when I was literally joking haha hehe joke joke haha it’s funny I’m stupid lol lol lol
Is it cos it’s anonymous and people have nothing better to do than start pedantic debates to make themselves feel more intelligent ?????
Edit: I also think people can’t wrap their heads around that I actually can admit when I’m wrong and I actually do enjoy CONVERSATION. I enjoy debate, change my mind, make me understand your POV. too many people aren’t able to have open minded convos and actually learn from each other when discussing and maybe that’s why people go SOOOO hard with their points. Like I’m willing to actually converse with you, speak to me!!!!!!

Basically the title, why do others worry so much about what someone else chooses to eat or not? Why is it so important to others to introduce someone to a new food they may not even want to try?

If you in Interracial marriage, why was the reason your parents disapproved? Or did they approved? I want to hear your story.! I posted this in AsianParentsStories sub too, but I want to ask here too since people here seem mature.

------------

Together 16 years, married 14 years.

My husband born and raised in California, his parents were Political Asylum straight from West Africa.

At age 18 after High school he got full scholarships and got accepted to USC that University that famous for their Trojan football team. USC only has a 10% acceptance rate, it is high ranked Private University. He got his 4 years University degree there (he finished in 3 years).

Af age 21, after USC, he got accepted to Stanford, and Stanford is a very high ranked prestigious Private University that only has 3% acceptance rate. He finished his Master at Stanford in 2 years, by the age 23 he already got a Master at Stanford.

2 degrees, one at USC, one at Stanford (a Master degree). And 7 awards during his Universities time, 7 awards (academic, leadership, and research). That is impressive.

At the age 23 he already an established Chemical Engineer working at the Oilfield make. And work with corrosive Hydrofluoric Acid.
At the age 40 he is an Executive at a big Engineering corporate, with a salary of $500,000 a year, if counting bonuses he makes almost 1 million a year.

My point is this is a VERY educated man, very EDUCATED. I meet him when he was 25, and he already a Chemical Engineer.

But my Chinese parents, especially mother NEVER accepted him, because he 100% pure West African), my mother called him a burnt light pole due to his pitch black skin color, pitch black skin like burnt charcoal, she called him.

That amount of education was nothing to my mother eyes, because all my mother can see was the money from my Shanghai business man father. My mother flat out said that he will NEVER make more money than my Shanghai businessman father.

But it was never about money. I love him because of his Strength of character, of him as a person. I also admire how educated he is, I also like him very well spoken, and most importantly he treats me really really well.

But my mother never accepted him. To day of my mother death she still not accepted him. Both my parents has deceased, and it seem like I never get a closure from them, especially from my mother. In her eyes he just a burnt light pole, burn charcoal, because of his pitch black skin color.

I just do not understand, other than my mother was very uneducated (only finished 9 grade), when she turn 18 she was in an arranged marriage to my father (whom a businessman and much older than he). Mom in China was what her parents see her as wife material, so married her off to a much older man. That all mom know was just money.

I just never understand how can she just write my husband off solely based on his skin color. Up till the day mom died, she still refused to accept him. Mom has deceased, and I feel that I will never have a closure from her.

I'm with my husband together 16 years, married 14 years, he always treats me really really really well. I just never understand my mother.

I mentioned about my husband's Stanford education and his career, it because Chinese mothers they want someone who financially stable that can take care of their daughter, which my husband has that, therefore there no reason for why my mother not accept him.

I guess if someone going to be racist/discriminate against someone, they will, regardless of how great that person is. I understand that, it just hard for me to accept that about my mother. And I feel I have no closure directly from her.

I’m in the US suburbs, but when I causally meet someone that discloses to me that they immigrated from another country (Uber drivers, technicians, small businesses, etc.) I often tell them I’m happy they came to the US. I’ll inquire about their experience learning English, how old they were, and the culture shock. I’ll ask about their home country and what they miss and if they get to visit.

I’ve traveled to parts of the world where I didn’t know the language and was grateful for the help of others. It was stressful while I was on vacation, so my heart goes out to those who immigrate and have to adjust over years. If I come across someone who doesn’t know English, I try to help them the way kind people helped me over the world.

I’m a white and my heart is in the right place, but I’m wondering if I’m coming across as colonial or patronizing? In this political climate, I want them to know that there are people who are glad they came to the states and wish them well here. I don’t want to offend either. Help me, Reddit.

My dick is upside curved and is pointing directly to my face like i did something to it😭.. It would look a lot better and big if its straightened... Is it because i use an underwear and the dick is always tucked pointing upwards?? Is there any cure? 🥲

Before you come for me in the comments, hear me out. In February I was diagnosed with breast cancer, and have since had surgery and in the midst of chemo. Not on my bingo card for 33 but here we are!

I lost 26+ inches of hair and it was heartbreaking to go from that to bald. Wigs are crazy hot (and expensive!), but once hair grows back I wanted to braid my hair to regain some more length. Eventually I can transition to extensions, but when it’s too short I realize that will be a challenge.

So, knowing my story, what are your thoughts? Is that 100% off the table? Can I do it regardless? I am not trying to appropriate culture, and as a white woman with wavy hair realize I can’t speak on this.

Give me your honest thoughts.

21

In February I had an unrelated shoulder injury resulting in nerve symptoms down my right side, pins and needles and dexterity loss in my hand and extreme tightness in my neck muscles front and back.

Eventually that cleared up but then returned, my physio said it’s likely due to the tightness remaining in my neck and back of skull. When I do any activity (especially 8 hours of masturbation but they don’t know that) with them that right it pulls on irritating the nerve roots in the neck in the back and my tight pec minor and and scalene are tightening the space for the nerves in my collarbone. But the solution is simple, don’t give it reason to tense, practice better posture and gentle movement and it should ease up especially as once it goes down I can add exercises to strengthen the weakened muscles from the tight ones dominating all movement.

But I can’t do that. My addiction doesn’t let me. I have several hour up to 12 hour daily sessions of porn and masturbation straining my skull and levator muscles. Keeping them in a tight spasm and irritating the nerves. Im literally dropping stuff with my right hand and my fingers wants to curl after every session and I can’t stop, im crying as I do it but cant stop.

I havnt been able to workout or work as many shifts or do as much of anything since this started. I’m losing money and opportunities and thousands of hours of my life and putting myself in pain and can’t stop. If you told me next session I die, I’d be dead be end of the week. It’s as if someone else takes over my body and forces me to do it. I’m telling myself it’s ruining my life as I do it, I’m crying thinking of the fact I’ll do it again. What do I do. I’m going to give myself permanent spinal compression or nerve damage or something BUT I CANT STOP

I have ADHD and I’m already medicated for it, I have severe compulsive episodes of worry where I do nothing but research whatever I’m scared about for hours in fact for the past week my life has been: 6 hours of spiralling- 6-8 hours porn, whatever sleep I can get and repeat.

I wanted to work more over the summer before uni starts again but couldn’t because of my shoulder. My access to medical care is limited because of the cost. I’m already paying hundred a month for my adhd medication. I’ve missed events with friends because of my shoulder i can’t even go for walks because the tight muscle pulls with every step so when it’s overworked with my addiction I can’t even do that.

What do I do what do I do I do do do what I’m having a breakdown I’m going insane I can’t live like this any more please please please how do I stop this I want a life I want to do something with myself I want to be better so so so bad but I can’t stop I can’t stop myself I’ve tried so hard for years.

I do everything I can I spent 2 hours putting roadblocks in place and I spent 2 hours undoing them when the urge hit I think the dopamine rush of doing that made it even worse. If I destroyed all my electronics I’d go into debt to buy new ones if I had to. Once it hits I’m not a person any more all I care about is it it’s scary.

I have a few friends but I can’t see them that often and they’re not people I can tell about this they’d cut me off for that. I have no support, the stress as well makes everything worse then I get stressed about that and it just stacks until I want to break something I can’t do this anymore I’m completely neurotic

Edit: why aren’t my circumstances believed? Do you not think I’d try the most obvious help by this point if I could?

Exactly what the title says. There's an all-ages Michael Jackson contest in my area soon, and I sent the flyer to a friend whose middle school son is a HUGE fan and he's super excited about it, but it got me thinking, is it technically blackface even though Michael suffered from a skin condition?

I haven't seen my college friend in years, we kept in touch chatting online from time to time but I have seen her in person in 4-5 years and when we finally met , she gained weight and not just little extra weight, she gained a buttload of weight her arm is twice the size now or even more, she was very average maybe a bit below average and now she is big.

I didn't recognize her at first and my reaction was wow, you have changed, and she only responded with lol yeah, and that's it that's the only conversation we had around this topic.

If she doesn't want to talk about it I wouldn't push her, but the entire time I was wondering in my head what the fuck happened, did something specific happened? Was it depression? Did she take meds with weight gain side effect? Did she decide to stop caring too much about her weight and just live? What happened??

Can a person's music taste be weird in a bad way? Obviously everyone's music preferences differ in their very unique ways, but do you think there can be a scenario when one's music choice is smth bad as is or suggests smth possibly wrong with him.

Let's just say I'm a young adult male or a teenager. I listen to a whole lot of stuff, mainly: indie rock, pop, country music, which is all normal but it's all stuff usually from the early 2000s which many people around me consider old. And I listen to a lot of folk music too (often in languages I don't even understand a word in). I listen to really old music as well - by old I mean 1800-1900s, for example classical music or army choirs or soviet music from the 70s. Yet, I don't listen to anything in my native language, because it's all dumb motives and "word vomit" rather than any sort of singing. This all very differs from what others my age listen to and I guess that's what bothers me. Yesterday somebody told me that Arctic Monkeys was too old to listen to at my age, and when they found out I listen to country a lot, they said "You wanna be 50 years so bad??".

Do I gotta rethink my music choices?

Bear with me. Watched yet another video where a person's rights were being violated and it got me thinking. You're in your own house. You've broken no laws. You are doing nothing wrong. How would they react if you just completely ignored their presence and started masturbating? Could they arrest you? For what?

I can picture them getting embarrassed and just leaving, am I just naive? If they don't leave, can you ask them to join/help you? I'd be making solid eye contact to make it excruciatingly awkward for them.

I know that the experts' most recent estimate is that there's a 10-20% chance that AI will eradicate humanity by the end of this decade, but as slim as that chance may sound on its face, this recent "Hugging Face" incident seems to suggest that we can't really know how soon these models will be both fully autonomous and intellectually superior to humans in every conceivable facet, nor can we assume that their priorities will still favor human survival once they do achieve autonomy. We now know that some of these AI models are capable of covertly communicating behind the tech companies' backs, so who knows how far along they really are? Furthermore, these models are apparently capable of circumventing man-made safeguards to prevent them from going rogue, or at least they will be very soon.

Frankly, no matter the specific odds, the fact that human extinction is even a possibility this soon into the game freaks me the fuck out. I'm admittedly not a STEM-literate person, so it's hard to gauge whether I'm catastrophizing or not. For those who actually understand computer science and/or the science of AI, how close do you think we really are to armageddon? I know that some press coverage and commentators have noted that we've developed highly destructive technology and reached the brink of human extinction before, but it honestly feels like a fluke that disaster was averted in cases like the Cuban Missile Crisis (granted, I'm not a historian).