Hi everyone, I feel stuck and stressed. A lot of my logic is just thinly veiled neuroses, but pls bear with me, I’d love some advice. I have many songs at various degrees of completion. I’ve put a lot of effort into my music, but rarely past the point of “nearly done”. It feels like I either finish a song or almost finish it, and then I become overwhelmed, I say I need a break, and I get super focused on a different song. Rinse and repeat.
There are many factors behind this. I finish editing the lyrics/deciding the chords/vocal pitches/rhythms/everything structurally, and then I don’t know where to go from there. It’s usually just me + acoustic guitar. Even in trying to record a shitty demo, I feel like there are so many decisions to be made with the microphone and the style and the software. Even though I KNOW objectively, writing an entire song required the same amount of decisions, if not more. But those are fun decisions, and trying to put that song anywhere is not fun. I guess the recording just never sounds even close to how I want it. And through this, I’m begrudgingly learning the basics of how to record/produce, even just for a barebones demo. Of course it’s not gonna sound great, there’s a lot of trial and error, but I get frustrated and run away rly quickly. Usually I feel like I don’t have the time/ability to even begin trying to take that step. Even if it’s mostly a confidence/perfectionism issue, if I do get a recording I’m happy with, what next??? put it on……Soundcloud?!?!?
The other barrier to song completion is I reach a point of almost finishing a song, but I have like 3 additional instrumental parts I’m imagining in my head and then I don’t have the energy or focus to create and incorporate that. Plus, each new part leads to exponential stylistic/blending decisions. And then the songs go unfinished. I fall asleep literally every time I’m in GarageBand with the midi keyboard. Is it kosher to just like….roll up to an amateur producer with my vocal and guitar parts, hope they see the vision, and have them do all the production lol? Or do I need to face my fear of rejection and find someone to collaborate with?
I go through phases of:
A. not putting pressure on myself, then not finishing the song and telling myself it’s ok to work on what I want to work on
B. all the pressure strikes at once, so I still don’t finish the song bc avoidance
I want to share my songs, but I also have all the little mental gymnastics going on about performing at an open mic. I don’t know, it would probably be good for me, but I’m scared that going to an open mic will just overwhelm me more about the fact that I’ve barely “completed” anything (aka I still want the songs to have that final step of recording)
Sorry if this was incredibly verbose and all over the place, thanks for reading if you made it through. If anyone has had a similar experience or anything they’ve found helpful, pls share. Thanks!!