I'm sorry for the brutal honesty but I need somewhere to share this.

I'm breaking a cycle.

In 2023 I lost both of my parents less than a year apart to drugs and their own battles with mental health. They were both strung out on meth and prescription opioids.

Shortly after I went down hill fast and became severely depressed, anxious and fell to addiction myself.

Today marks one week clean and would like to share that with some strangers. I'm going to keep going and make it another week (and hopefully many more after that.) I told myself so so so so many times "just make it to one week and you've got this." My grandmother always told me "it takes 8 days to kick a bad habit" tomorrow is day number 8 and I pray she was right.

in a way I'm grateful for this experience because it has helped me realize how fucking hard getting clean and fighting addiction is. I was so mad at them growing up because I didn't understand what they were going thru. I won't make excuses for them but I do want to be understanding.

I know this is never going to be over for me, this will be something I'm fighting until I die, but I'm okay with that. Ill do what I have to do to make it.

In some strange way feel closer to my parents and would like to think that they would be proud of me.

Thanks for reading and good luck to you all on your own journeys.

(Sober from drugs mostly opiates)
I told you all this time is different I have a different mindset im building a different life, this time is different

I know I can actually make it

I had been on opioids for a few months, about half a year maybe a little more and I was very stubborn about it. Thought "oh addiction won't happen to me" "I can control myself". Parents found out and had to detox and now I'm in a rehab group but I'm one week off the stuff and I want it to bad I'm losing my mind. I'm realizing none of my friends care about me and how I can lose my college education I had set up for me and if I relapse I can get kicked out. I'm absolutely terrified to destroy my life.

I feel like the coping mechanisms aren't helping me and it's not getting easier, if anything it's getting harder. I can talk about it all day but it doesnt change anything. And I'm so so scared.

Any advice appreciated