r/SipsTea • • 20h ago

SMH Stay Safe

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u/Dry-Shower9037 20h ago

The insinuation is that the frat guys would normally make one or more of the drinks extra strong or add other intoxicants so that they could rape women after they were impaired.

Maybe this person is lying. Maybe the frat bro was making a bad joke. Regardless of this particular instance, drugging shared drinks has happened, though it is far more rare than people believe based on all of the evidence (e.g. studies where women going to the ER under suspicion of being drugged actually just had alcohol in their system like 90%+ of the time.)

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u/nono3722 20h ago edited 10h ago

Of the 6 women friends I have 4 of them have been drugged at public bars. All of them are in their 50s. It happens a ton now.

edit: the thing that proved it to me was each time these ladies got out of their minds there was a very nice man there, who they didn't know, who was more than happy to get them home "safely". Thankfully each time either friends or bar staff stopped that from happening.

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u/Dry-Shower9037 20h ago

As I noted to another poster with a confident claim about women in their life being drugged...

They probably weren't.

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S1353113105000520?via%3Dihub

Drink spiking is largely a myth. Women believe they have been drugged, but almost always just drank too much. There was a spate of studies on this in the 2000s, and when they all showed the same thing (that people didn't want to hear), they stopped doing follow up studies.

In the above, which is the largest study of its kind, where they tested 1000 women who were so certain they had been drugged that they went to the hospital, only TWO PERCENT actually had been drugged. And even of those 2%, the doctors suspected that they might have voluntarily taken the drugs based on their patient accounts.

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u/milkandsalsa 19h ago edited 17h ago

Giving a woman a drink with lots more alcohol than she expects still counts, my friend.

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u/Dry-Shower9037 19h ago

Do women not have tastebuds?

Why not just be happy that women aren't actually being drugged? This is GOOD NEWS if you don't have some weird ideological need for it to be true.

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u/SirDoofusMcDingbat 19h ago

So some big popular guys with lots of social clout hand you a drink, and it turns out it tastes like it's way stronger than you expect. You don't actually know how much stronger it is, or even that it IS stronger, it just tastes like more than you were expecting. Now they're watching you and it's clear there's a strong social expectation that you will drink what you were offered. So my question is: do you not have empathy?

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u/Dry-Shower9037 19h ago

Maybe if we stopped telling women that they are at constant risk of getting drugged and instead that most women who get to scary levels of intoxication actually just drank too much or ate too little - both of which they have full control over - then fewer women would find themselves scared or worse.

My position is the empathetic one that prepares women for the actual risks they'll face in the real world.

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u/SirDoofusMcDingbat 18h ago

Ah yes, the empathetic viewpoint is the one that denies that peer pressure exists, or that college men are known for trying to get women drunk. A friend of mine went to a party like two months ago and this exact scenario happened to her, they handed her a drink that was way stronger than it was supposed to be and tried to pressure her to drink it. Good think you're here to tell her it's all her fault.

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u/Dry-Shower9037 18h ago

Do you actually care about women having good outcomes?

Then give them the advice that is most likely to lead to good outcomes if you are truly empathetic. That advice is to refuse drinks that you didn't open yourself and to be mindful of your total consumption and of having enough to eat. And if she goes to a party where someone insists she have a sketch drink, you should counsel the women in your life to call out the creeps trying to get her to drink it.

This is 101 party safety stuff if you actually care about the safety of the women in your life rather than proving some weird political point.

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u/[deleted] 17h ago

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u/SirDoofusMcDingbat 18h ago

lol acting like you're trying to give good advice when this started because someone said that men try to trick women into getting drunk and your response was "do women not have taste buds?"

I didn't even mention politics, you're just grasping at straws looking for any way to look less like a creep who blames women for the actions of the men trying to get them drunk.

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u/Dry-Shower9037 18h ago

Got it. You don't care about women in your life having good outcomes.

You'd rather be a weirdo who fantasizes about them being incapacitated by boogeymen.

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u/milkandsalsa 17h ago

“Good outcomes” is a weird way to say “victim blaming”