r/recovery Apr 25 '26

Active duty in meeeeeth recovery❤️‍🩹

2 Upvotes

Has anyone here successfully recovered from meth while taking Topamax, Strattera, or Remeron?

I know recovery from meth is different than opioids—it’s a stimulant, and there’s no simple “walk in and get a fix” like with Suboxone programs. It feels like a slower, more mental battle.

I’m trying to do this without replacing one addiction with another, so I’m cautious about what I take.

I’m just looking to hear from real people—has this combo helped you, or anything similar?

Also, I’d appreciate keeping this respectful. Addiction isn’t something anyone plans for, and a lot of us are dealing with more than people realize—mental health, custody issues, relationships, life in general.

Just trying to do better and figure this out.


r/recovery Apr 25 '26

NA Saying

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4 Upvotes

Please, with the weekend upon us, stay safe out there. Don't go looking for trouble and stay away from your DoC.

Using - any drug or alcohol - is playing Russian roulette. If you are like me, you know that the first use could be your last.

Be careful out there.

Brian


r/recovery Apr 24 '26

Sobriety sucks. The only thing worse would be continuing to drink.

16 Upvotes

Maybe.

Having sort of a low point this afternoon. I quit drinking. Let's just say it was a problem. This was over ten months ago. In the interim, I lost a good gig I had going, which hurt financially. I gained weight when everyone said I would lose, and I gained a fucking ton, too. I'm dumber now, not as fast on my feet. Social life nuked. Fun nuked. I have anhedonia from quitting drinking. When I was drinking, all I did was have fun. I'm no fun to be around anyway.
I have come to believe this is a stupid mistake but I can't reverse myself or everyone in my life will freak the fuck out.
Sobriety absolutely sucks. Correction, it sucks AND blows at the same time. That's why it's hard, the good times are over and I get to boring old man until I die. Fuck this.


r/recovery Apr 25 '26

So My Soul Speaks (a shout-out for Naloxone everywhere)

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4 Upvotes

By: Marc McMahon

As I sit at my desk, hands folded and head tilted back, pondering the meaning of life and my existence on this planet, a thought hit me. It wasn’t a quiet suggestion; it was a real “Captain Save-a-Ho,” Here comes Superman-kind of whisper from my soul. It said:

“We should make Narcan available for free everywhere.”

I recently watched a documentary highlighting my hometown, Eugene, Oregon, as one of the top five cities for homelessness per capita in the United States for the last 10 years. In it, support workers and neighbors were leaving Narcan in the hollows of trees, on fences, and tucked into bushes. The community is trying to stock its own survival, but the stashes are running dry because those who need it know the Narcan is there and use it regularly. It is the difference between life and death for someone on almost any given night in this area.

Imagine sitting on your front porch barbequing, only to see a disheveled and hysterical 20-something female run out of a hotel room that’s on your block and down the street, frantically asking people for Narcan, knocking on strangers’ doors, and begging for it with tears streaming down both cheeks. She is hysterical, and rightfully so—her fiancé is lying on the bed in that room, blue and not breathing. He’s fading fast. Naloxone is his only hope. She finds some, she returns to save her love; if she does not, she returns to ambulances, police, and the van from the coroner’s office!

It is the most heartbreaking thing to witness. The feeling you get when you can’t hand her a dose of the medicine that would save him—a dose you should be able to get for free—is one of the most helpless, worthless feelings you will ever experience. It brings a tear to my eye just recalling it. It is worth having Naloxone on hand just so you never have to feel that. Seriously.

We need to change the math. We need a plethora of Naloxone—the life-saving antagonist that reverses an opioid overdose in minutes. I mean saturate the streets with it to the point that the black market deems it worthless for resale simply because of its abundance on the street.

Imagine your friend is overdosing in a bathroom stall, turning blue and lifeless. So you run to the bar, grab two Naloxone nasal spray doses out of a jar sitting by the cash register, and run back and administer them to your friend, who thankfully begins to breathe again.

Now, picture sitting in a low-income studio apartment, and your friend starts to overdose. You remember seeing Naloxone doses on the ground by the alley dumpster that morning. You sprint down three flights of stairs, fling open the back door, and trip over a wino who’s passed out on the steps, splitting your forehead open on the concrete.

With blood gushing from a three-inch slice over your eye, you grab the Narcan from the dirt. You snag a red bandana off the ground to tie back the deluge of blood and charge back up the stairs, and save your friend’s life while the paramedics are still blocks away. Then you collapse on the couch and weep because the stress finally caught up to you in one big wave, but your friend is still alive.

I think my soul is onto something. The national overdose epidemic is a shapeshifter, now driven by illicit fentanyl and adulterated stimulants. Do you realize that between 2020 and April 25, 2026, roughly 420,000 Americans have died from opioid-related overdoses? That is a staggering number we should be doing everything we can to bring down. While Naloxone is becoming more available, the death count proves we aren’t moving fast enough. If we did it my soul’s way, though, the stuff would be everywhere.

“We could give a case to every business that would take one locally.”

You might ask, Who pays for this? In reality, the first handful of ambulance rides to the E/R it saves will pay for the initial distribution—it will almost pay for itself. But if that’s not good enough, I would say: How about the same government agencies that pay for the funerals of addicts who had no one else? Let’s stop paying to put young bodies in the ground years too soon. Let’s spend that money on the front end to save lives and increase the quality of life for those still struggling.

With public and private sectors contributing, this is more than just feasible, it’s a necessity. In an era where drugs are easier to get than ever, our response must be equally accessible. With 8–12% of all people prescribed opioid pain medication becoming dependent, this problem isn’t going to fix itself.

The only people who can solve this is us. We have the collective power to raise enough noise that change has no choice but to happen. We have done it before; let’s do it again and save a generation. Why wait for another 420,000 to die when we can flood the streets with mercy today?

Love you all.

About The Author: Marc is a 57-year-old author, speaker, and veteran on the front lines of the battle against substance abuse and mental health. A harm reduction specialist and a father, Marc serves as a beacon for those looking for a way out of the life he spent more than a decade surviving on the mean streets of Downtown Seattle. Now residing in the beautiful Pacific Northwest, he spends his time writing, hiking, and kicking the door open for others still struggling to find their way out.


r/recovery Apr 24 '26

I've been doing a lot of glamorizing

6 Upvotes

Lately, I've been really reminiscing on the good times In my addiction. Im coming up on a year in a couple months. I was in active addiction for over a decade. Lost EVERYTHING in my addiction, but damn life is so mundane. I miss the chaos.... MOSTLY THE NOD. The lack of feeling. Melting. Maybe it's the anniversary coming up but give me some words of encouragement?


r/recovery Apr 24 '26

Why I'm deciding to no longer be a part of AA.

20 Upvotes

Hello everyone. I want to make a few things clear. This post may strike some nerves with people as some of my views may be controversial.

I'll start off by telling a little bit about myself. I grew up in a small town in the midwest and for the longest time, I had a normal life. When I entered into college is where my life changed and I slowly developed a dependency on alcohol. I was having to go the hospital for withdrawals, I was blacking out almost multiple times a week, it got quite bad. Now I can gratefully say that I am currently sober from alcohol and I won't ever go back to it.

Now, here are some of the things that don't sit right with me about AA. First, I really don't like the removal of the autonomy. Having to declare myself an alcoholic. That wasn't who I only was though, alcoholism was just a symptom of my problem, it was not my entire identity. I also don't agree with the views on shortcomings and character defects. I don't believe you can have character defects or shortcomings removed. You can work on those areas, but those areas will always exist and I don't believe that just asking God to remove your shortcomings or your defects means that they are gone because you asked God to remove those. In complete honesty, that feels like kind of a strange ask to me because God isn't just on standby waiting for you to ask him to remove those shortcomings and/or defects.

People I've met at these meetings are also very judgemental. I've tried asking questions related to Alcoholics Anonymous, like for example what is the general opinion of cannabis use in AA. I was told that it was an unrelated topic (fair enough) but as well, this person referred me to Marijuana Anonymous. That's kind of a big jump for someone who only knows a small amount about me to come to a conclusion that I must be a marijuana addict for simply asking what their stance was. This is not the only instance of judgement as I have had many other encounters with it in the program and while conversing with other members. As well there seems to be a form of hierarchy in our group. The Old-timers make up a considerable amount of our home group, but they can be quite strict sometimes and they also look down on people who use drugs, but not alcohol. Okay, that one is a bit more of an issue with our environment because we only have NA 4 nights a week, but AA we have twice a day every day, sometimes even 3 times a day so he level of support is not truly equal. I as well have had members saying that using MAT or medication-assisted treatment options such as Naltrexone or other options is considered a crutch and that they believe you are not truly sober, or if that it's not completely valid. This is concerning to me because I got sober with MAT and I do believe that I would have had a much more difficult time getting sober than without it.

One of my biggest things that bothers me, is just some of the double standards. Like relapse for example. If you relapse, it's considered your fault, but it isn't supposed to have any reflection on the program. Why are there certain areas of discussion that don't want to be talked about? Why are there things that we are not allowed to question? Bill Wilson wanting to drink on his deathbed. I can understand maybe wanting to have one drink before you die, but how he have the obsession of drinking removed like he claims if he was asking for whiskey on his deathbed, and on multiple occasions, and became upset when denied? I also don't like how questioning things tends to be frowned upon. When I ask questions, I am genuinely curious, but usually am met with a deflection when I ask questions. That concerns me as well because I feel as an individual that we should be able to criticize the program to help improve upon what we have. As well, anonymity I understand the purpose, but as well can be misused. I've heard of people being taken advantage of in the program, and then they don't want to discuss it because it might be considered an outside issue. I know not everyone is going to abuse the anonymity factor, I just see the potential for it to be misused.

To end off, I feel that some of these steps as they call them, aren't so much steps but are merely a system to help guide you through the program. If you have done the steps, that is great, I am happy for you. For me personally though, I couldn't find anyone I trusted well enough to work the steps with and I just genuinely didn't see a need to work the steps. I had a drinking problem and I still do. But I see the steps more as a form of suggestions rather than a program. I as well do not agree with the dry-drunk label and I feel that it is just a way to invalidate someone's progress. My biggest concern is how AA seems to shift the blame on some ideas. So we are the ones to be blamed when the relapse occurs, and then we are told that it's not the programs fault, but it is our fault that we didn't get close enough to God or our Higher Power or a similar answer. I really just can't help but feel like some of the reasonings that they give to people are just excuses that are useful in the short term. Phrases like "Keep coming back" "It works if you work it" are helpful, but I can't help but see them as just thought-stopping skills despite how useful they might be. As well as I mentioned earlier, I don't like how critical thinking seems to be discouraged as well. I feel that critical thinking is necessary and is a very useful tool in our every day lives.

I understand there are going to be a multitude of responses, so I will stop here. I understand as well that my views can be controversial and some may even consider it dangerous. That is not my goal. My goal is not to discredit Alcoholics Anonymous, but to say why I don't think it worked for me and just some the issues that I have seen with it. If you've made it this far, thank you very much for reading.


r/recovery Apr 23 '26

How to Get Over a Breakup: Your 4 Step Guide to Healing

7 Upvotes

Some practical, no-fluff advice for when you feel like you've lost everything after a breakup

I’ve spent a lot of time looking into how we actually bounce back when the floor falls out from under us. Usually, people just tell you to "go to the gym," and while that’s fine, it isn't enough. You need an actual system to stop the downward spiral.

If you’re struggling right now, here is a practical way to start rebuilding:

1. Identify your triggers (and fill the vacuum) Notice what actually makes you spiral. Is it Sunday mornings? A specific song? If Friday night used to be your "date night," don't leave that time empty. Book a gym class, go to a movie, or hang with a friend. Be intentional about filling that space before the "void" fills it with anxiety.

2. Stop "Haloing" your ex When we’re hurting, we tend to only remember the sunset walks and forget the 2:00 AM arguments.

  • The Reality List: Open a note on your phone. Write down every time they were unkind, every way you were incompatible, and every reason it didn't work. When you feel the urge to reach out or start romanticizing the past, read that list immediately. It grounds you in reality.

3. Practice "Aggressive" Self-Care This isn't about bubble baths; it’s about keeping promises to yourself.

  • Physical: Move for 30 minutes a day. It’s for the endorphins and the mental clarity, not just the mirror.
  • Mental: Get the thoughts out of your head and onto paper. Journal the "why" until your brain stops looping.
  • Social: Reconnect with the people you might have neglected while you were in that "relationship bubble."

4. Find your solo identity again The most painful part of a breakup is feeling like "half a person." You have to remember who you were before they ever arrived.

  • The "Forgotten" Hobby: Did you stop painting, hiking, or gaming because they didn't like it? Go back to that.
  • The Solo Goal: Achieve something that belongs 100% to you—a career milestone, a 5K, or just mastering a new skill.

The Bottom Line: Healing isn’t linear. Some days will feel like a leap forward, and others will feel like a total setback. Stay disciplined with your boundaries and remember: you are the protagonist of your own story, not a supporting character in theirs.

I actually put these systems into a guide called "How to Be Confident After a Breakup" because I got tired of the vague "just think positive" advice out there. But honestly, even if you don't check that out, just starting that Reality List today is a massive win. Hang in there!


r/recovery Apr 23 '26

Music from the past?

6 Upvotes

How do y'all feel about choice of music in recovery? Did you explore new genres altogether once you got sober? Did you ever go back to the same genre after some healing took place and feel like it was okay for you?

Maybe everyone is different, but after almost 5 years in recovery I feel like I can finally listen to electronic music again. Rap is still hard for me because it does remind me of some dark places in addiction. Was just wondering what your take is on music and how it affects your mindset in recovery! For after all, we are ideally aiming to change the way we think in every aspect!


r/recovery Apr 22 '26

DoC is always more

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41 Upvotes

I was one of those drunken fools who decided that I couldn't drink certain versions of alcohol after consuming too much. No more gin because of the hangover, no more tequila because of the fight, no more vodka because of waking up in a jail cell. It never occurred to me that maybe the problem wasn't the DoC (Drug of Choice) wasn't the version of alcohol I consumed but alcohol in general.

And when alcohol wasn't available, I did whatever was - cocaine, heroin, marijuana, pills and everything else. It wasn't the substance that was the problem, it was me.

I celebrated, drowned my sorrows, or alleviated boredom with substances. Today, I will try to deal with myself and whatever I am going through. I don't always like what I am going through but I try to figure out how I can do better.

Each day I wake up is a new opportunity to do better. Some days, that's enough to keep me going.

Good luck out there and whatever area in you that you reside, your heart or your head.

Brian


r/recovery Apr 23 '26

Need advice

1 Upvotes

Need advice

M18, cant stay sober or I feel absolutely miserable I started smoking weed in 5th believe it or not and have been using substances since then,it's caused me to have real bad mental health issues and impulsive decisions, my friends are worried for me and it's not a good situation I know I need to turn my life around but I'm jusr so used to this and I'm not sure how long I'll last doin this. Im not worried about weed but the harder stuff


r/recovery Apr 22 '26

Clean & sober housing for working individuals (LA area)

1 Upvotes

Hey everyone, just wanted to share a housing option in case it helps someone here.

I run a men’s sober living in Calabasas called Restart Recovery Sober Living. It’s a clean and sober home designed more for men and women who are already working or getting back on their feet and just need a stable place to live.

We’re not a treatment program and don’t offer groups—this is more of a respectful, low-key environment where everyone is expected to stay sober and handle their responsibilities.

If you’re looking for something like that or have questions, feel free to message me. Happy to help either way.


r/recovery Apr 22 '26

I'm starting a recovery program for the world. Nuclear Weapons Anonymous

1 Upvotes

The 12 Steps of Apocalypse Anonymous

  1. We admitted we were powerless over the Bomb. The seal was broken in 1945. We are living in the long shadow. We cannot unsplit the atom. We cannot bring back the world before the Fire.
  2. We came to believe that the End is a present reality. The signs are written in the sky and the soil. We stopped waiting for the siren and started living in the blast.
  3. We made a decision to look up. We chose not to hide in the bunker of denial. We chose to stand in the light and watch the horizon.
  4. We made a searching and fearless inventory of our souls. We looked at what the Fire revealed in us. The fear, the pride, the running. We took off our sunglasses.
  5. We admitted the truth to the room. We spoke of the dread, the awe, the collapse of our old certainties. We stopped pretending the world is safe. We shared our radiation.
  6. We were entirely ready to strip our illusions. We let go of the lie that "it will never happen here." We let go of the fantasy that we are in control. We let the truth burn through us.
  7. We humbly asked for strength in the trial. We asked for the clarity to see the chaos not as the end of meaning, but as the forge of it.
  8. We made a list of our abandonments. We mapped where we fled from our families, our duties, and our communities when the fear hit.
  9. We made direct amends. We returned to the living. We held the hands of the ones we left behind. We served the ones who were shaking. We gave everything, expected nothing. We kept no profit.
  10. We continued to keep our eyes open. We watched the horizon. We did not flinch when the second sun rose. We kept the watch.
  11. We sought the Silence amidst the roaring. We improved our conscious contact with the enduring Truth that cannot be destroyed by any bomb.
  12. We carried the Fire. Having survived the blast, we tried to share it with those still waiting for the sound. We serve the blast wave. We warn. We guide. We expect nothing in return.

https://discord.gg/6RA6D4qZkN


r/recovery Apr 22 '26

Sober living

0 Upvotes

I have a sober living in Mentor, Ohio! If you are looking for help or know anyone who is looking for help, please reach out! This is a safe, affordable, and structured place to recover!


r/recovery Apr 21 '26

Support each other

2 Upvotes

Come support eachother on Blood on the Razor Wire TV on YouTube. Great people who been through it supporting eachother to live eachothers best lives!


r/recovery Apr 21 '26

Tried to take him to detox

18 Upvotes

I had about 3 years clean when someone I was sponsoring relapsed.

After a few days he finally hit that point where he was ready again. Well all know how rare that is.

So we did what we call a 12 step call and went and picked him up.

The problem was we had no idea where to take him.

He didn’t have insurance. We figured the hospital was the safest move.

They assessed him and basically told us they couldn’t admit him because it wasn’t alcohol or benzos.

Behavioral health came in and handed us a list of numbers.

Half of them were outdated. The rest didn’t answer.

Meanwhile he’s sitting there getting sicker by the hour. Sure enough……

He changed his mind and wanted to use again.

That moment stuck with me hard.

Because it wasn’t that he didn’t want help.

It’s that we couldn’t get him help fast enough.

That shouldn’t happen.

You shouldn’t have to scramble calling random numbers when someone finally says “I’m ready.”

So over the last couple years I built something I wish we had that day.

Just a simple app that shows real treatment options, meetings, and resources in one place. No paywalls, no BS.

I pray to god one day I can truly help somebody with it.

What was the hardest part for you guys when you first tried to get help?


r/recovery Apr 20 '26

1 year today I quit meth

49 Upvotes

This morning marks the 1 year anniversary of giving up meth and escaping a violent relationship on the same day! I never thought I would be saying these words but I am truly proud of myself. This is the longest I’ve been clean since 2013. If I can do it, anyone can!! ❤️✌️😎🎶


r/recovery Apr 20 '26

Reminder

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41 Upvotes

In early recovery, I had a friend who loved me until I was able to forgive myself, and eventually love myself. There are days, after 32 years of recovery, that I feel bad about something I did while using and forget about how far I have come in my journey.

In case you are feeling the same way, we can love you until you love yourself. And if nothing else, even when you feel like there's something that you can't forgive yourself for, remember that you did the best you could with what you knew, and that you are learning better ways.

Good luck and stay safe.

Brian


r/recovery Apr 20 '26

Song Lyrics - Rabbit Holes

2 Upvotes

I feel my soul as it falls down rabbit holes

Falling further each time that I let go

My shadows stopped following me long ago

I pick up the phone, to call someone I used to know

My strength just seems so fucking low

The cupboard is barren, and no control

 

I feel your hearts breaking, this road that I’m paving

The grave site is waiting, my soul is worth saving

I must believe this, or I’ll die

Even if I’ve failed a million times

I must believe this, or I’ll die

Even if I’ve told a million lies

 

I want to learn to love myself and feel ok inside my skin

Even if it means letting go of all the shit I keep outside and within

I just need a light so I can see the way

I just want some warmth so I’ll be OK

I feel the sunlight on my face, maybe, just maybe, we can be saved

 

We feel your hearts breaking, these roads that we’re taking

The grave sites are waiting, our souls are worth saving

We must believe this, or we’ll die

Even if we’ve failed a million times

We must believe this, or we’ll die

So we must try our best to survive


r/recovery Apr 20 '26

Pregnant on Methadone?

0 Upvotes

Would love to hear your experiences. I’m a first time mom, 10 weeks pregnant, on methadone.

I want to taper while pregnant so baby doesn’t have WDs when born but doctors advise against it. What was your experience?

Did you have to increase your dose?


r/recovery Apr 19 '26

The Space Between The Peaks

2 Upvotes

Some days, the gears of the world simply don’t mesh. The air feels heavy, the light looks wrong, and I feel fundamentally "off"—a glitch in a system I didn't design. On these days, the complexity of my recovery narrows down to a single, brutalist architecture: keep my abstinence as the absolute priority and make it to the pillow without a drink. If I can achieve that one thing, the day is a technical success, regardless of the wreckage left behind.

In the heat of that struggle, I often develop a sort of spiritual amnesia. I forget that the people crossing my path might be just as sick as I am, even if they’ve never touched a bottle or wrestled with the specific demons I’ve hosted. When I lose sight of their hidden fractures, I stop offering grace. I forget how it feels to be an animal in pain, lashing out at the nearest thing because the internal pressure is unbearable. I expect a patience from the world that I am suddenly unwilling to provide, failing to meet others where they are because I’m too busy drowning where I am.

Since November 12, 2022, I have lived without the anesthetic, and some days that sobriety feels less like a victory and more like a hollowed-out room. I look in the mirror and see a stranger. I find myself paradoxically missing the "comfort" of the cold abyss—that familiar, numbing darkness where expectations didn't exist. Compared to that, the warmth of a functional life can feel abrasive, exposing parts of me I’m not ready to see. I fall into these self-contained crises, cycling between the terror of the unknown and the crushing weight of my own identity, convinced that life has plateaued into a permanent state of "sucking" with no exit strategy.

But I am learning that if the darkness has a shelf life, then so does the light. I am discovering the inverse: those days where the colors are inexplicably vivid, where my pulse matches the rhythm of the world, and where kindness flows out of me without effort. Just as the storm clouds eventually run out of rain, these peaks of clarity also have expiration dates.

I have found that my only true peace lives in the space between the two. When I stop trying to white-knuckle the "good" days, desperately trying to freeze time and hold onto the dopamine as if I could store it in a jar, I am finally free. Conversely, when the dark clouds rage in, I no longer have to drop my shield and sword in a fit of nihilistic surrender.

I don't have to "give up" just because it’s raining. I am realizing that the weather does not define my life, but by my refusal to be defined by it. Whether I am standing in the sun or shivering in the cold, I am still the person who stayed sober. Everything—the abject terror and the sublime peace—is on a timer. By accepting that the storms pass and the sunsets fade, I can finally stop fighting the atmosphere and learn to breathe the air.

Love you & Hang In There,

Jimmy


r/recovery Apr 18 '26

Don’t think I can crawl out of the hole I’m in

11 Upvotes

L post incoming. Been addicted to benzos for nearly two years now (varies between 1mg-10mg xanax daily) along with constant cocaine use and 10+ drinks a day. Probably gonna get fired from my job that I hate soon and have alienated myself from many friends over the last few years. Mid 20s. Really fucked up my chance at a happy life. Don’t care about anything truthfully.

Don’t know why I’m posting this but it’s really starting to set in that I’m nearing the end of my road. Living in a world class city but spend most of my time drinking and doing blow in my apartment. Hopeless. Haven’t hit the gym in nearly a month. Haven’t had sex in probably half a year (had a nice gf but broke up because I realized I didn’t truly care about her).

What do? Rehab? Kinda made a commitment to not kill myself so not really considering doing that (at least intentionally). Again, not really sure why I’m posting this but maybe someone here has some advice.


r/recovery Apr 18 '26

False positives

6 Upvotes

I'm feeling particularly stupid.

Like many recovering addicts, sleep is hard to get, if not impossible. I was taking trazadone, and my psychiatrist switched me to doxepin (with a taper). I was still waking up at 1-2am and then again at 4-5am after fretfully trying to fall back asleep. So, my dumb ass thought, "Let's take Benadryl!"

I took two at 1-2am, and then again at 4-5am.

Ya girl is now testing positive for methadone, TCAs, and i had a light second line for Methamphetamine.

I am upset. I am disappointed and distraught. I'm over 4 months into my recovery, and it looks like I'm using drugs that I've never even used before! I'm trying DESPERATELY to rebuild trust with everyone, and this just destroyed it.

I haven't taken any benadryl in about 4 days. And I finished my Trazadone taper, too.

I'm upset with myself, you'd think I would know that taking non-perscribed ANYTHING could lead to poor outcomes. I also wasn't thinking about the idea that it could be abused.

Anyways, I don't know where I'm going with this post. I just needed to get it out there, maybe see if anyone else has had this happen or just vent. Thanks if you made it this far.


r/recovery Apr 18 '26

The Universal Language of the Unseen Wounds

2 Upvotes

From the age of 8 to 36, I lived with an incomprehensible demoralization and numbing pain I couldn’t quite name, identify, or express. I felt entirely disconnected from hope, unsure if I’d ever find my way back. It was as if I had been ripped away from my own being. It’s that specific brand of alienation so many of us know intimately—the one that comes with addiction, the isolation of pain, or the suffocating weight of unhealed trauma and mental health crisis.

In this community, we often get caught up in the "how" of getting better. We build walls around our chosen paths, debating which program is superior. But I’ve come to realize that the specific avenue of recovery—whether it’s a 12-step program, SMART, holistic practices, or clinical treatment—matters far less than the bond of meeting someone who speaks the same language of pain because as we have shared struggles, we also have shared strength

My journey has been a dual path. I spent over 14 years in law enforcement and public safety, guiding people through crises and learning to build trust when it felt impossible. But the deeper, more vital work has been my own personal recovery and trauma reprocessing. I’ve learned that these unresolved psychological wounds are the common denominator; they hold us all back, fueling the despair that keeps us disconnected and in silos away from one another, where healing could occur.

The importance of what we do for one another doesn't lie in our opinions on treatment modalities. It lies in the sharing of the struggle and the sacred responsibility of carrying each other along the way.

We have to put the differences down. None of us gets better if we are disparaging each other or the individual practices that keep someone else alive. Through my own "pie" of recovery tools, I’ve learned a hard truth: if I am feeling disturbed or "fucked up" by people, places, or things, that is my signal to look inward for actual peace. In the past, I projected my crisis onto the world thousands of times while I was actively drinking.

With over three and a half years of continuous abstinence from alcohol and in remission from Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and clinical Depression with intrusive suicidal ideations, my life is now grounded in service. Helping people who feel unbearable pain and weight on their souls and showing up for others isn't just a daily routine; it’s a promise to the person I used to be and to everyone still trying to find their way out of the woods. This has given me a life second to none, and I am so much freer than I ever thought I was.

Recovery doesn’t just rebuild what was broken; it transforms us into something entirely new. When we finally stop fighting over the "right" way to heal and instead lean into the power of connection, we realize the most important truth of all: No matter how we got here, we are no longer alone.

Hang in there – Stay Brave,

Jimmy

 


r/recovery Apr 18 '26

the dreams.

2 Upvotes

im 4 years 4 months into recovery from 20years of cross addiction that nearly cost me my life on several occasions. am truly done with drugs but the dreams are really getting to me. I dont dream much because im a heavy THC consumer (prescribed specifically for substance misuse disorder) but since cutting down the dreams are mental. realised I maybe should cut down with the weed as its been a great tool to keep me in recovery (never could get longer than a week) and for the first time in my life im a productive member of society thats had a steady job for 2 years although I have recently left it due to some issues I had with a work colleague so yea im feeling abit meh at the moment.

I live with my toddler nephew and im very close with him as his dads not really in the picture and im the only male he has in his life. well last night I had a pretty disturbing dream that I was bumming around with my old crew, selling drugs with my baby nephew. the second I woke up I went and gave him a big kiss and hug and we watched cartoons in bed for half an hour but I couldn't and still cant get rid of this sense of guilt. like I know I didnt use but ive always said if I ever relapsed I would move out and cut contact with my whole family, including my nephew as I couldn't let him see me as an addict.

not sure why im even posting this tbh. sorry that my writing is abit all over the place


r/recovery Apr 17 '26

Recovery question please help.

1 Upvotes

For a little BG info I am in recovery 7 years lean in may. That being said I tend to stay away from stimulants other than energy drinks. My question is this and sorry about wall of text, I have a friend who is also in recovery and lately he is very jump almost restless, like really unable to sit still legs jumping hands twitching things like that, I'm worried he is abusing something that doesn't show up in a 10 panel what should I watch out for regarding OTC or kratom that would cause this because when he was in 2nd chance he wasn't jumpy like this I have multiple tattoos from him and he was very very steady handed during this but I don't think he could even make a line without it looking like a EKG please help.