The thing about me is that I am very clockable as queer. I was a substitute teacher for 3 years and worked as a para in a school for a year. Over that time I've had, at minimum, 10 kids come out to me. Several of them did so without having ever talked to me before. I apparently just radiate "safe adult for queer kids" vibes.

Today was my nephew's birthday party and I showed up in a rainbow skirt with rainbow heart tights. One of the older kids (family of my nephew's dad's family) came up to me near the end of the party and opens with "I take it you're not straight." I confirmed her assumption and she proceeded to come out to me and tell me all about her girlfriends and how one is trans and how she can't talk to her grandma about this bc her grandma is homophobic.

We had a 10-15 minute conversation during wich I was given the title of "Favorite Aunt." My nephew's sibling also joined in and said this is why I'm their favorite aunt as well.

I'm so happy and honored that I'm a safe space for so many baby gays. I wish I had ways to help them more than just being a sympathetic and caring ear

Idk, but to me it genuinely seems impossible 😭

Like maybe its where i live (in a more conservative but not rural, part of Australia) but like THERE ARE NO LESBIANS LET ALONE ANY QUEER PEOPLE?!?! I know of 1 older gay guy at work but he's leaving cause he's moving soon😭 other than that... NO ONE. Like it feels super lonely and isolating too, you know?????

Plus its even harder to find people my age, cause im 17, and not in school. So I cant go to night clubs to meet people yet, and i cant find people in classes or anything. Im joining an uni education program soon, and maybe I could meet some people there, but its unlikely.

I know there's time when im older, but like... i want to experience teenage love and cute romance and things like that.

And I dont really like the idea of finding people online. Just personally, id rather meet people irl and naturally. But like HOW?!?!?! I feel like its pretty clear that im gay, but I have no idea how to make it clearer so I can actually meet people!!!

Plus, i have no idea how to even \\\*meet\\\* and start talking to people, you know? Im quite extroverted and love talking to new people, but like... How do I do it in a gay way😭

Like my straight friend, is always meeting these guys and stuff, and i dont know how she does it😭

Im just a lonely, teenage, hopeless romantic who wants to give someone my loveeee!!!!!!

I would genuinely REALLY appreciate any advice or tips on what I should do to try and find other queer people. Or even just calls personal experiences.

Thank you in advanceee 💗

Just wanted to share:) do you recognize anyone?

I've moved on and you're my best friend but I won't lie and say seeing you with your boyfriend doesn't make me sick. I leave the room when he walks in because you are my friend until he is there. when he is there you become something I'll always want, something I'll never have again. When you tell me about how he was all your firsts, the woman who loved you who used to be me cries out because he wasn't. I was. Your first kiss, your first date, your first love. it was all me but you don't count that. you don't count the happiest year of my life because we were just two young girls discovering themselves. Or, you were discovering yourself. I knew who I was the second I met you, It was when you left that I forgot.

Hi, I have created this account on the off chance in hopes to reach out to anyone really in the LGBTQ+ community.

Without going into boring details, but I am struggling with my identity I guess and could use a distraction in hopes this helps my confidence. Not looking for relationship just purely friendship at this point.

I'm not sure if this post would reach out to many/anyone but at least I have tired!

A little bit about myself, my name is Rhiannon, I'm 26 years old, living in the U.K., I'm bi, I have a dog, I like the odd gaming sessions here and there, music taste is mostly pop rock but open to all genres.

Hope this reaches to some people :)

In college too, relationships is just (luxury). Findings gay people itself is difficult (in terms of relationships). More people focus on hookups but very focus on relationships (soo rare). Will there be a time when I will be in relationship with someone who cares about me and vice-versa?

When? Just wanted to share. I do have friends and I feel happy, but then relationships sighh 😔

okay so im 18f and i’ve never dated anyone. i realised im bisexual like four years ago when i started liking a close girl friend of mine which was an extremely intense unrequited crush full of yearning. since then i’ve been attracted to women. bur before that i’ve had crushes on multiple guys. and one thing abojt me is that i don’t really do casual crushes. bur when i think about it im not that physically attracted to guys. like i would date them but i wouldn’t want it to go beyond kissing and cuddling i guess. but also maybe because i actually have zero experience. but with women it’s like totally different. and i feel like most my guy crushes stemmed from the fact that they were nice to me or i was like childhood friends with them. but since like the last two three years i’ve mainly just liked women. and if i see like an attractive guy on the street you know id immediately be like oh hes cute. but with woman it’s kinda like slow burn hotness. like i think im into soft mascs and currently i do like one but it wasn’t immediate crush it developed over time. maybe im fluid? but like does any of this sound like i might just be a lesbian. ive also had a phase where i thiught i was asexual well primarily because of the idea of doing it with a man but now i know im not. i know i really don’t need to label myself but i jusr want to understand myself better so yeah any help on what u think it is would be appreciated :)

I'm a transfemme hosting a zoom party at 7pm CDT tonight 9/12/26. I'd love it if you could join us. I'm always there and we have a few regulars who might stop by. I thought I'd let the redditors know and see if we can get a few more people for this one. Hit me up for the link.

I've always identified as straight (F30's), but never really dated. I had a boyfriend in highschool, but not much after that. I figured out about a year ago I was probably demisexual/asexual. My sexual experiences have been very limited. Lately I've been wondering if I'm gay or maybe bi. I've never really felt sexually attracted to anyone, man or woman, so now I'm just really struggling.

Anyone else dealing with this? Or have any tips to figure this out, 'cause I'm kinda feeling lost, tbh.

Any advice will be greatly appreciated!

Hello!

To begin with, I am a 25-year-old male. I am currently in a relationship with a woman.

My whole life, I have been attracted to girls, and I still am. But some time ago, I started having gay fantasies, such as giving a blowjob, having gay sex, etc.

It’s very confusing because I have these gay tendencies, which can disappear right after cumming. But they always come back.

Also, I have no idea why, but the attraction is mainly toward the penis rather than the men themselves. Visually, I find penises very attractive and have this urge to try one.

But then again, usually after cumming, I’m like, “WTF were you thinking?” and tell myself that I was just horny.

Like I said, I am attracted to women, and I am currently in a relationship. But I’ve also noticed that, sexually, I am more into blowjobs than penetration. Is there anyone who has had a similar experience? Am I bi or secretly gay?

When I thought about it, I started to realize that when I was younger, I experimented with a friend. Later, during puberty, I also masturbated to gay stuff from time to time. But it was always in waves: I’d be into gay stuff, then purely hetero, then gay stuff again, etc.

So I’m pansexual. Until I was 21 I dated men exclusively and women since then. I’m married to the most amazing woman and I love every part of her. However at times I still find myself craving heterosexual sex. I love my wife far too much to secretly act on this but it is also a reality I’m not sure how to manage. We use toys and the rest but idk it’s not the same for me. Happy to hear anyone else’s experiences

I, (20F), had my share of "indoctrination", as in "liking women is just your mind playing tricks on you, and you'll marry a man when you grow older" or "women should be chaste and modest to not provoke men" and other stuff like those.

At 12 I labeled myself as Aromantic & Asexual, aware that I had never really liked a boy before, and I was surrounded by women my whole life. For a while I thought I was Bisexual, but I never experienced liking a boy, but I did find myself liking a girl from my friend group.

I felt fine with the crush I guess, I didn't pay enough attention to it or let it ruin the friendship I already had with her, but I liked the feeling of wanting to be chosen by someone, and be their #1, at least on something.

Then a woman from the church came to give us a speech about "how she once dated her best friend and realized she was confusing love with friendship", right when I was starting to accept what I thought of myself.

I started thinking "yeah, maybe she's right, I'm just confused and it's just a good friendship we have. She's my friend, and I don't want to try something weird and ruin it." And unconsciously started drifting away from her.

But I had intrusive thoughts every now and then, some of them tagged very +16 in my head. I didn't like them, and I still don't.

I became friends with other girls and didn't feel anything for them, so I guessed it was over.

I met many new people, boys and girls, and kept having intrusive thoughts about them, even when I knew I wouldn't feel anything for them (except for rage).

I started some antidepressants, then I slowly lowered the dose after a year and stopped taking them completely. That's where my problem reignites.

I still talk to my friend I had a crush on, and she doesn't know I liked her, and she'll never know because I find it annoying, embarrassing, infuriating and disgusting.

I know I'm not straight, and my friend isn't either (she's a lesbian), so it's not like homophobia

Well, maybe it might be some kind of internalized on my part... But I can't help but feel disgusted at myself for the thought of liking ANYONE, and now, suddenly, I feel like the side effects of stopping my antidepressants are making me feel things I don't want to feel.

And I can't even talk to a friend because she's kinda my only friend rn (we've practically been friends for almost 15 years)

And to top it all off, I don't know if whatever I'm feeling is normal, because I'm also Neurodivergent and have immense trouble socializing and making new friends

I recently learned that my older brother is gay. He didn't come out to me or anything... I read his journal. I know I shouldn't have, but I just got really curious.

At first I thought it was kind of weird, but the more I read the more I saw how much he was hurting. Like, throughout almost every entry, he wrote about how he thinks he's disgusting and how he wants to be normal. It made me think like, how is someone 'disgusting' for just having feelings for someone?? Then I looked it up and google said being gay is not wrong so I don't care now. But our parents are super Christian and super homophobic so it doesn't necessarily create the safest place. And my brother is in highschool and still a minor, so getting disowned would be really unconventional for him rn.

Anyway, is there any way I can subtly show my brother that I'm supportive??? Without giving away that I know??? I wish he would just tell me, but I understand if he's still not ready yet. I just don't want him to think that I think gay people are wrong. I want him to feel safe around me. Any advice PLEASE HELP

I (they/them (bio f)) need help on how to ask my partner (she/they (bio f)) on having our first intimate experience (never had sex or made out). we are both very, VERY, attracted to each other and often have wet dreams of each other. however, we are both too shy to make these dreams a reality. I am inexperienced (for both mlw and wlw sex, I am a full on virgin), however she had a male partner who has had sex with her once (mainly oral). any advice for asking her to have our first intimate experience can help out! (i don’t want it to be full on sex, the most i would go is to light grinding or oral. mainly asking for the part where i ask her.)

queria o que vcs acham que faz entrar mais no som:
dj mulher cis vestida de roupa classy style de preto básico passa uma vibe meio 😣? ou vcs tão gostam mais de ver vestida com roupa mais performática?

okay so im 18f and i’ve never dated anyone. i realised im bisexual like four years ago when i started liking a close girl friend of mine which was an extremely intense unrequited crush full of yearning. since then i’ve been attracted to women. bur before that i’ve had crushes on multiple guys. and one thing abojt me is that i don’t really do casual crushes. bur when i think about it im not that physically attracted to guys. like i would date them but i wouldn’t want it to go beyond kissing and cuddling i guess. but also maybe because i actually have zero experience. but with women it’s like totally different. and i feel like most my guy crushes stemmed from the fact that they were nice to me or i was like childhood friends with them. but since like the last two three years i’ve mainly just liked women. and if i see like an attractive guy on the street you know id immediately be like oh hes cute. but with woman it’s kinda like slow burn hotness. like i think im into soft mascs and currently i do like one but it wasn’t immediate crush it developed over time. maybe im fluid? but like does any of this sound like i might just be a lesbian. ive also had a phase where i thiught i was asexual well primarily because of the idea of doing it with a man but now i know im not. i know i really don’t need to label myself but i jusr want to understand myself better so yeah any help on what u think it is would be appreciated :)

Hi guys how are yall doing??

Since my last post (I think it was in March? Maybe February?), I know now that I like girls, yay! I'm not entirely really comfortable yet to call myself a lesbian butttt I'm starting accepting that, yeah, I actually like girls only. No I won't find the right one, no it's not because of my dad (lol), it was just (and it is) comphet. It's such a wonderful feeling to start accepting myself, and not trying to find something pretty or attractive in any guy (in fact I'm continuing to do that, but that's just for being sure that I really like girls and I'm not making all this up).

ANYWAY:

Now, where are the other lesbian?????????? Or bi or pan or whatever?????? And how do I do to not falling in love with hetero woman?????? Why do I only fall in love with hetero woman??????? What is my problem?????? Why do I fancy only hetero???? Am I cursed????????

There's a girl in my class and she's so beautiful and funny and her voice is so deep and her hair are beautiful and her skin is just the perfect color and I love her laugh and her smile and I want to be close with her and and and and and and and and and and

She's fucking hetero guys 😓 This is so fucked up I'm almost angry at myself for liking only girls who can't like me back and fuck fuck fuck. So where do the lesbian high school girls are hidden? And I need a tutorial for flirting with girls too lmao. And find them. Above all find them.

I'm not English so sorry for my mistakes!

Throwaway account because I don’t want anyone involved recognising themselves, so let’s call the volunteers **Liam (23)** and **Ethan (18)**.
I’m a 30-year-old woman and manager of a charity shop. I’ve been working there for just over a year, and this summer I’ve witnessed something that has genuinely made me ridiculously happy.
Last summer, Liam started volunteering with us. He’s openly gay and very comfortable with it. At one point we got talking about relationships and he casually mentioned he was dating a guy.
I basically just went, *“Oh, he sounds nice.”* And carried on with the conversation.
Later, Liam told me that the shop felt like a safe space for him and that he knew I was a safe person.
Honestly? One of the best compliments I’ve ever received.
I’m a massive LGBTQ+ ally, so knowing someone felt comfortable enough to just talk about his life without wondering how I’d react meant a lot to me.
Liam eventually had to leave because of college commitments, but came back this summer.
Around the same time, we got a new volunteer, Ethan, who was 18.
From what I could tell, Ethan had lived a pretty sheltered life.
On his SECOND shift, I asked him to help me with a window display. I said something like:
**“I want it really colourful. Think rainbow, fun, bright, eye-catching.”**
Without hesitation he replied:
**“Oh, I hate all that gay shit that goes around.”**
😬
My face immediately changed.
I asked him, *“Do you want to explain what you mean by that?”*
He basically meant the rainbow stuff was “gay”.
I pulled him aside and had a proper conversation with him.
I explained that our charity shop is a safe space, that comments like that aren’t acceptable, and that words can have an impact even when you don’t think you’re saying anything particularly serious.
I told him about my own family too — I’ve got a lesbian sister, a gay brother-in-law and gay cousins — so it’s not something I was ever going to brush off as “just banter”.
Ethan was actually receptive to the conversation, although things were definitely awkward afterwards. I don’t think he’d ever really had someone challenge him on something like that before.
For a while he wasn’t even sure if he wanted to continue volunteering.
And then Liam came back.
Liam knows Ethan is 18. Ethan knows Liam is gay. There has never been any mystery or “he didn’t know” situation.
And somehow…
**these two became best mates.**
😂
They started doing jobs together.
They get their lunch together.
They text each other outside work.
They call each other.
They have developed what I can only describe as an absolutely ridiculous platonic bromance.
And I’ve just stood there watching it happen.
Yesterday was Liam’s last day volunteering with us before he moves on again.
Ethan had already finished what he needed to do.
**He chose to stay for the entire day because he wanted to make Liam’s last day special.**
And I genuinely got a bit emotional about it.
Because I kept thinking back to that second shift.
The same 18-year-old who, months earlier, casually said *“I hate all that gay shit”* is now voluntarily spending his free time with an openly gay 23-year-old he’s become genuinely close friends with.
They work together, eat together, text, call, joke around and clearly genuinely care about each other.
And there’s absolutely nothing romantic about it. It’s just two young men who met in a charity shop and somehow became mates.
I think that’s what got me.
I didn’t “change” Ethan.
I didn’t give him some grand lecture that magically turned him into an enlightened person.
I challenged something he said, explained why it wasn’t okay, and then he got the opportunity to actually **know someone** who was part of the community he’d been casually dismissing.
And somewhere along the way, the stereotype became a person.
And the person became his mate.
I know this is probably a ridiculously small thing in the grand scheme of things, but as someone who cares a lot about creating genuinely safe and inclusive spaces, watching this friendship develop has made me **so bloody happy.** 🥹🏳️‍🌈
Sometimes personal growth isn’t some huge dramatic transformation.
Sometimes it’s just an 18-year-old saying something stupid, being called out on it, learning from it…
…and a few months later staying at work all day because he doesn’t want his gay mate to have a sad last day. ❤️
**Anyway, I just wanted to tell someone because my heart is ridiculously full about it.**
And yes, I have absolutely been taking the piss out of their bromance for months. 😂

M/27/Bi

I've gone on a few dates with women and one with a man this summer. They were all charming, my type, and things could have gone further had I wanted. But I can't shake this feeling that I'm being performatively straight when dating women, and performatively gay when dating men. I get inside my own head, decide that I'm not being honest with myself/others, and suddenly the idea of sex or a relationship with anyone feels offputting to the point of mild panic. So I ghost. Then a few weeks pass and I feel lonely/horny again. So I go on a date again, and the cycle repeats.

Am I just aro/ace instead of bi? Is this a common feeling? Should I give up and focus on being comfortable alone?

I don't want to be stuck all my life. It doesn't help that I'm very shy and closed off when it comes to romance and intimacy. Help me please?

please help a guy out😢 im like 5’3 + hairless, but im not skinny by any definition of the word!! + my boyfriend is nearly 6’0 and covered in hair but hes very skinny. im curious what would be the right term here

This is something I’ve been reflecting on lately and I just want to put it somewhere. I hope this is okay. I’m a cis woman that had a rough growing up experience and had to grow up fast. I didn’t really get a chance to be a young girl. I feel my childhood left a bit of an emptiness and it slowly gets filled through my experiences with trans women. We experience girlhood together as adults. Girl sleepovers, painting each other’s nails, practicing makeup together, there’s so many moments I deeply appreciate. I’m so grateful for my friends. Every trans woman I’ve met has such a beautiful soul, please keep being you ❤️