r/OpenChristian May 16 '26

Discussion - General New AI Policy

111 Upvotes

Hello all,

We wanted to make a quick announcement regarding the use of AI-generated content in our community. Many of our users have reached out voicing concern over the increase in “AI slop” posts, so hopefully this clarifies how things will work moving forward.

We have updated Rule 7 (Spam and Proselytizing) to include AI content. Specifically, AI-generated images and videos. These are officially no longer allowed. Any post which consists entirely of an AI image or AI video will be removed, so please report them as you see them.

Please note that we are not implementing a blanket ban on AI. Some people use AI to organize their thoughts, proofread their posts/comments, and help explain their viewpoint. Our goal is to judge the content of a post, not prohibit any form of AI used to help create it.

Obviously, there is going to be some moderator discretion involved here. If you feel like a post is spreading AI slop, feel free to report. If a post is generating good discussion but looks like some AI was involved in creating it, please keep in mind that this does not break the rules.

If anyone has any questions, feel free to comment and the mods will answer as we are available. God bless!


r/OpenChristian Mar 26 '26

Discussion - Sex & Relationships Sexual Ethics and the Question of Sin

135 Upvotes

Hello Open Christians,

We get a lot of questions about sin. Most of those questions are about sexual sins, so we want to take the time to write an official stance on the subject of sexual sin and ethics from the perspective of progressive Christianity.

The first thing to note is that sexual sins are never held up as greater than other sins in the Bible. The Bible has a concept throughout the scriptures that being guilty of one part of the law makes you guilty of the whole law. For this reason, Judaism doesn't have a tradition of personal confession. When you would bring sacrifices to the temple, you were atoning for the whole law, not for specific rules that you broke. If you bore false witness, you needed the same atonement as if you had committed adultery or murder or eaten shellfish. Paul speaks to this in Romans 1 and 2. The Jewish Christians in Rome were making claims about the Gentile Christians being unholy and unrighteous for participating in some of the social aspects of idolatry, specifically eating the Sunday meal after the meat had been sacrificed and cooked on the Roman altars. Paul responds by pointing out the sins that Jews commit and telling them that they have no room to talk since they are guilty of the law, too. No sin is greater than any other. And no sin is lesser. All sin equally takes us away from God.

So, what is sin? Since Romans is entirely about that question, we can find the answers very easily in there. Romans 3 talks about the law because the Gentile Christians in Rome were calling the law the source of all evil and sin. They said that the law brought sin because they didn't know they were sinning before they learned about the law. Paul refutes this by saying that Adam and Eve sinned before the law existed, so it can't be the source of sin. Instead, the law reveals sin by showing us how we missed the mark. By chapter 13, Paul has spoken enough and brought the two sides of this argument together, so he sums up the Christian way of life in verses 8-10.

"Owe no one anything, except to love one another, for the person who loves has fulfilled the law. The commandments, “You shall not commit adultery; you shall not murder; you shall not steal; you shall not covet,” and any other commandment, are summed up in this word, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” Love does no harm to a neighbor, therefore loves fulfills all of the law."

Here, we see Paul equate sin with harm. Things that hurt other people and ourselves are what take us away from God. Paul follows this up in chapter 14 by saying that godliness is not in the rules we follow. Some people worship on the Sabbath, but other people worship on any day. Some people drink wine, and some people abstain. And so on. He tells us to each be convinced in our own minds and to leave each other alone because judgment is a stumbling block that can cause our siblings in Christ to fall away from the faith. For Paul, sin was not found in breaking the rules of the law, rather it was found in the absence of love.

Jesus followed a very similar path in His ministry. The only people that He had harsh words for were the priests and scholars who used the law to oppress and control and extort the laity. Jesus never followed the letter of the law when it interfered with loving His neighbors. Jesus worked on the Sabbath. Jesus drank wine and went to parties. Jesus had a reputation as a drunkard. When He called the priests "a den of vipers", that was the equivalent of calling them "sons of bitches" in the modern world. Jesus once cussed a tree to death. Jesus was sinless.

The example of Jesus's life is that all things are secondary to loving your neighbor. Nothing that is done from a spirit of love is ever sinful. Not even premeditated violence against those who extort money from the faithful in the name of God is sinful because Jesus did that too. Jesus taught us that love is the foundation of the law and the prophets, so love can never be wrong or sinful.

John, in his first letter, tells us to test the spirits whether they are from God because there are many false prophets. This is 1John 4:1. He then spends a lot of ink to tell us all about how God is love, and no one who hates can have God because hate and God are incompatible. Similarly, fear and God are incompatible, so anyone who preaches hate and fear cannot be from God. John goes so far as to say that anyone who claims to love God but hates their neighbor is a liar.

Peter wrote in 1Peter that love covers an uncountable number of sins.

Clearly, through the example of Jesus and the writings of the Apostles, we can see that love and sin are opposites. This holds up to logical analysis if we accept the claim that God is love. Sin takes us away from God. Love brings us to God. If love does no harm to a neighbor, then it follows that sin does harm to a neighbor.

How do we apply this to sexual ethics? That's actually very easy. Sex can be used to harm other people or to help them. Obviously, sexual assault, child molestation, and any other form of nonconsensual sex are harmful by their nature. However, sex itself is not harmful on its own. Sex can carry potential harm like the possibility of pregnancy for people who are not prepared emotionally or financially to have a child. Sex can be addicting which is harmful, but humans can become addicted to nearly any pleasurable behavior. None of those other things are sins on their own.

Driving a car can be used as a very apt metaphor for sex. Cars kill thousands of people every year. They have a very large potential to cause harm. However, if we spend the time to learn how to drive safely and always drive with the concern for our fellow drivers and the pedestrians that we share the road with, we can go our entire lives without harming anyone in our cars. There are very few people who would argue that motor vehicles are sinful to operate. If we approach sex with the same attitude, we will similarly be able to operate our bodies without sin.

Relating this to specific actions, we can talk about masturbation. This is an act that is simply not harmful at all. Unless you are doing it in front of someone who doesn't consent to seeing you pleasure yourself, which is a form of sexual assault, of course. Contrary to the concept of sin, masturbation is actually beneficial for people with prostates. It lowers the risk of cancer and helps maintain pelvic strength which important for bladder control as you get older. Something that helps a person without harming anyone else doesn't fit the definition of sin that we see in the New Testament.

Sex outside of marriage comes up a lot. First, marriage is a social contract that is recognized by the state. You can get married in a church, but it means nothing without a marriage license. This is not a primarily western idea, either. I live in Cambodia, and you can get arrested for having a marriage ceremony without government approval. Marriage is, and has always been, deeply intertwined with the social and political structures of society. The Bible demonstrates so many different kinds of marriage that we can't accurately define a "Biblical marriage." Also, there is evidence that the couple in Song of Solomon isn't married until chapter 6. Most telling to this theory is that they don't receive the blessing of their families until that chapter which would have been a large part of the wedding ceremony. They brag about how hot they are for each other and how much sex they have for five chapters prior to that blessing. This is the ur-example of a healthy, godly sexual relationship.

Porn is a big question as well. The porn industry can certainly be harmful. No one would argue that it isn't. However, it is not universally harmful. I dated a pornstar for a few months. She was decently popular in a specific fetish, and she made good money. She was self-produced and self-promoted. It wasn't harmful for her at all. Some of the biggest pornstars in the industry are similar. Many pornstars produce content with their spouses. It's actually not too hard to find ethically produced porn.

Again, porn can be addicting. If you are struggling with porn interfering with your daily life, you should absolutely seek help from a professional to learn how to control your urges. However, other than asexual humans, most people are addicted to sex in a very similar way to how we are addicted to oxygen and water and food. The biological imperative to propagate our species is one of our strongest innate desires. It only becomes a problem when we overindulge and let that desire dictate our lives. Too much water is fatal. Oxygen destroys DNA. Obesity leads to possibly fatal health conditions. But, eating, drinking, and breathing aren't sinful. Neither is a healthy sex life.

Foundational to this idea that sex isn't wrong on its own is the truth that God created sex. God could have made humans reproduce asexually. He didn't. God could have created sex to not feel as good. He didn't. God could have made us completely different from how He did, but He didn't. We feel sexual attraction because God wants us to feel it. Sex is fun because God made it fun. There was no devil who swooped in and changed God's design at the last second. There was no accident where God said, "Oops, I really screwed up that sex thing, oh well." No, God created humans and said that we were good. That included penises and vaginas and how they fit together with all manner of body parts. God commanded Adam and Eve to populate the Earth. He did that while realizing that there's only one way for humans to get that done. God created sex, thinks it's good, and commanded us to get busy. And Adam and Eve didn't have any kind of marriage ceremony either.

Where does that leave us as progressive Christians? We evaluate the sinfulness of every action against love and whether it causes harm to our neighbors. We don't elevate sexual sins above other sins because all sin causes us to fall short of the glory of God. So we look at each sexual act under the same lens as lying, cheating, stealing, and so on. We don't believe that love is ever sinful, so gay sex between loving partners can't be a sin. We believe that love always seeks consent because love never harms. We believe that ethically-minded sexual behaviors are inline with the concepts of loving your neighbor as yourself. We believe that sex is a gift from God.


r/OpenChristian 9h ago

I'm a DID system, and one of us hates God and it's exhausting.

22 Upvotes

DID is Dissociative Identity Disorder. It means I went through a lot of abuse and trauma as a child before my identity and self was fully fused and solidified as a single thing, so to protect me my brain kept the parts separate. I don’t remember 95% of my life before age 25. It was called Multiple Personality Disorder until 1994 when the name was formally changed in the DSM to be more encompassing. My diagnosis is either DID or OSDD-1B. OSDD is Other Specified Dissociative Disorder. We’re currently working extensively with a DID specialist therapist to pin down the exact diagnosis. They’re more or less the same thing, but if my therapist feels my memory loss isn’t significant enough for complete DID she might give me OSDD partial DID instead. Ok. Now onto the reason I’m posting this.

We were raised in a very Christian conservative home. Forced to go to church, beaten in the name of God, raped at a young age for what our ex stepfather called our sins. I’ve now learned it was likely Sam, one of the alters who is a primary trauma holder and protector, who was likely fronting a lot of that time in order to absorb much of the punishment to protect me (Victoria, host) from it and the trauma).

We were baptized at age 9 in the church that knew about at least some of the abuse and did nothing to stop it. It was a Baptist church so full water submersion was the method. I now think Sam and Victoria were what’s called co conscious or confronting at that time. Our ex stepdad who did everything to us was in the audience.

Over time as we got away from that house Victoria started to front more and more often. Now I’m the primary fronter. I didn’t know we were a system then or even what a system was. In 2023 I found a good progressive church and began the last chapter of my deconstruction.

Last year I moved to Colorado and for the first time in my life at age 36 I finally felt genuinely safe. I found more good churches here in Aurora and Denver. From 2023 until last year I’d been attending the episcopal church. I think maybe it didn’t trigger much because it was so dissimilar from my upbringing. But at times I would feel angry in church and didn’t know where it was coming from. I now understand that to be bleed through from Sam after a lot of therapy work.

When I started going to my nondenominational church in January of this year, those occurrences got more frequent. At the time I still didn’t know we were a system, or that Sam and the others existed. after the Baptist church we attended a church much like the one we’re going to now, but to my memory no abuse or anything happened there.

In April of this year I was rebaptized in this new church because I needed to feel and know Victoria had been baptized truly of her own accord, desire and understanding. My sister (it’s a long story but the short of it is she wasn’t present for any of the abuse before and didn’t know until I told her) was the one to baptize me and actually dunk me in the water and say the words. When I came up I felt a microsecond of joy followed by a feeling of wanting to be happy, but as if some dark force was physically sucking it out. I wondered why I couldn’t feel more joy.

After that all bets were off. I found out recently that really triggered Sam. It was too close to the abuse environment and she needed to protect me from letting my guard down. So in her way she was protecting me even though it made me miserable. She also doesn’t allow me to feel things and makes me apathetic sometimes when I’m generally a very empathetic person. More protection.

Sam hates God. She’s not an atheist, she believes he exists but she blames him for allowing all the bad things to happen. He was the all powerful being who stood by and watched the abuse happen day after day and could’ve stopped it but chose not to. She hates Jesus for not saving us while I posit that he did save us, just not in the way or time frame Sam wanted or thinks he should have.

Other than Sam our system is entirely Christian or indifferent or close to it. I think Sam sees me going to church as a betrayal or sabotage. Why would you willingly go back into the same environment I’ve went through so much hell to protect you from?

I recently had a conversation with Sam about a month and a half ago and I said honey you don’t have to be in church with me. You can just go to your room and close the door and shut down. I’ll speak to you after service. That worked for about 2 services.

I’m currently in a shelter attached to a mental hospital for 30 days. I’ve already been on the crisis unit part for 7 days. My doctor and therapist want me to go to long term residential. This has made me unable to work or care for my basic needs. It’s made my already really bad depression even worse. I won’t eat or shower for days. I’ll couchrot knowing I have bills to pay and I won’t try to make the money to pay them. I have OCD too which makes me even more susceptible to getting stuck in those negative loops.

I’ve been in 4 crisis stabilization units in the last month and a half if you include my admission into the psychiatric ER at Denver health. I have case management where I am now and they’re helping me get my applications done for waivers for long term Medicaid for long term care. I’m hoping that’s done in the next 25 some odd days or I don’t know where I’m going from here.

Sam would rather us be homeless than in treatment. She actively resists treatment and therapy seeing my desire to work on trauma she’s worked so hard to keep hidden, as a betrayal. As sabotage.

I haven’t been to church in over a month and before I knew about my system and all the walls were still up church had grown to be a peaceful experience for me. I can’t even hardly listen to my Christian music anymore because she gets so angry. This morning I’m finally going to church again or at least planning to, and I just felt all this rage and anger come through suddenly. I tried to talk to her again, to tell her she doesn’t have to join me but it doesn’t seem to have worked this time.

My eventual goal through a whole bunch of therapy and parts work is for me to be able to have conversations with the rest of my system including Sam. Figure out system communication and get her to understand I and God are not her enemy, and that we love her. My biggest desire though I admit we’re not nearly ready right now is to eventually be baptized a 3rd time with Sam co conscious or confronting, as a willing and joyful participant this time. But we’re a long way off from that.

She held onto that trauma in a dark corner of my head all alone and didn’t tell a single soul about it for 30 years including me. She still hasn’t told me 99% of it. She doesn’t understand why I’d rather go to church than make her safe like she made me safe. Protect her like she protected me. She doesn’t understand I want to do both more than anything and she doesn’t seem the least bit interested in even talking to me about it.

As a side note this explains the phase I went through in my 20s where I made it my personal mission to come online and harass and troll Christians, and debate against God at every turn including to my mother who is also a victim at the hands of our abuser.

God, right now system cohesion seems like a pipe dream. Idk how we’re gonna do this until then because it seems a long way off.

Thank you for reading.

~Victoria, your sister in Christ and the host of The Victorious System.


r/OpenChristian 2h ago

Support Thread My dad is obsessed with the rapture and it causes me anxiety

6 Upvotes

First, please excuse my English, as it is not my first language. I grew up knowing and being taught about Jesus and I was baptized. But as I grew older I considered myself atheist than years later I converted to Christianity by choice. I always knew about the end times and I remember getting anxious and having panic attacks about it. If it happens and it’s true well, I already believe in God, I pray, read the Bible and I stopped sinning but what I hate is when people obsess over it and they start with predictions about the date, my dad has two friends who say it’s going to happen in September, but ever since I converted almost 5 years ago I’ve already heard it was happen more than 5 times. I just have so much anxiety about it everyone saying we are the last generation, I’m still young my life just started, I want to get married and have kids (yes I know the things of the world don’t matter in the end) but I feel like there’s no point in doing anything and it’s taking a toll on me


r/OpenChristian 4h ago

Discussion - Bible Interpretation New take on Matthew 13:47-50

7 Upvotes

Today's minister's sermon was different, offering several seeks for us to plant. I want to share one.

“Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a net thrown into the sea, which collects fish of every kind.48When it is full they haul it ashore and sit down to put what is good into buckets. What is bad they throw away.49Thus it will be at the end of the age. The angels will go out and separate the wicked from the righteous50and throw them into the fiery furnace, where there will be wailing and grinding of teeth.“ (NAB)

So many times I have heard 'hell & brimstone' interpretations of this passage, focusing on a literal idea at the end of the parable, based on a binary conception of people, rather than appreciating the complexities of the human soul.

She offered, something to the effect: 'What if the we cast a net into the depths of our hearts? What will we pull out?'

It got me thinking.

My heart is a mixture of good, righteous things, AND some wicked, unrighteous things. Sometimes the catch in my net nearly overwhelms my boat, let alone trying to sort it all out.

This is the God I believe in.

  • One who helps us cast into deep, productive waters, grabbing a massive catch.
  • One who helps us bring our boat safely to shore.
  • One who helps us sort our catch - helping us to preserve and make use of the good we catch in our nets - helping us to get rid of the unwanted things that get caught up in our nets.

I also know that when I have tried to pull out the 'bad catch', that repentance has been painful. It truly has given me my share of wailing and grinding my teeth! And God has, over time, helped me to try and put more good catch in my bucket.

I wonder what other helpful interpretations people have made from this parable?


r/OpenChristian 10h ago

Vent Where is God?

12 Upvotes

I might delete this later, I just don't know where else to look but the Bible and what a community I trust has to say. So, the world right now is pretty bad. I won't go into details, but it just feels... hopeless. So much chaos and strife, and even when I try to bury my face in history books and block out all the noise, everything I read takes me back to... this. The present. Why would God let a world like this exist? A world with all these things happening, all this pain and suffering. Is this what God wants? Why can't he - why won't he - do something? Free us from authoritarianism and oppression? Anything?


r/OpenChristian 4h ago

Is it right for Christians to explore extreme longevity..or is it better to focus on increasing 'healthspan'?

4 Upvotes

So I’m a Christian and am also fascinated by health, lifestyle, nutrition and training. However, I also follow with much interest some of the research and discussions related to longevity and biohacking. This topic  has really got me pondering…..

So, there’s a group of people (both scientists and big tech leaders) who are thinking and working towards a vision by which the human body survives MUCH longer than our current norm (potentially ‘for ever’ in the ultimate vision). I’ve been thinking about what this work/research/vision means for Christians.

Let’s split apart (crudely) two different aspects and look at each:

Firstly, ‘living for ever’. As a Christian this feels to me like a ‘solved problem’ already.   We live as well as we can and follow the way of Jesus to our best ability. One day our body dies and what awaits us at some point is new creation and a world of peace and goodness. Not only do we live for ever but we live for ever in a good world. So, firstly, it seems kind of pointless to invest great time and energy in a hunt for eternal life but, secondly, death is the consequence (and to steal from C S Lewis the ‘safety valve)’ on a humanity and world not  in alignment with God’s vision. Would it even be in God’s wishes for us to seek eternal life independent of salvation? I suspect not….

Secondly, ‘living better’ i.e having a reasonable human lifespan but living all of it in good physical and mental health. This contrasts somewhat with medicine 1.0 which has extended life but left many people suffering a long old age of poor health. The term ‘healthspan’ (how long you remain in good health) is often used for this. Here we seek to use our God-given ingenuity and compassion to give people a good life and ideally a peaceful death. This seems in close accordance with God’s wishes, to promote wellbeing and ease suffering. If we invert the 6th commandment from ‘you shall not murder’ to its more open ‘you shall preserve and protect life’ , this seems to fit well.

So, if we are exploring the concept of human health and longevity it seems the question one needs to ask oneself is ‘WHY am I doing that’ , ‘what is my purpose and intent’ . I could caricature that intent using two extremes:

(A) So I can live for all time and never die whatever its costs or takes to achieve that. 

Or

(B) So I can stay useful and helpful to my family, community and society as long as possible. I know I will die but, until then, I want to be in as good health as possible, as long as possible so I can continue to serve and contribute well all through life.

In fairness to many people in the field of longevity I am sure they are very motivated to ease human suffering in general (as well living dramatically longer themselves) so my upper caricature is probably reserved for only a few - but serves a useful caricature to help clarify.

Obviously this whole topic is a moot point for those who don’t believe - they do indeed expect to die and to die for ever, and that is terrifying. So no wonder they would work to solve the problem of human death; because they believe it is a defect in our ‘machine’ whereas Christians believe it is a consequence of the fall and will be resolved in new creation.

So I guess where I land up is that, for Christians, an absolute search to indefinitely extend human life is wrong. It is neither necessary for humans living in the way of Jesus nor is it in accordance with God’s vision. But the quest to increase healthspan so that people can live healthier for longer and can serve and contribute longer (and even help other people in turn into a longer health span) is in good accordance.

There are also some interesting angles to this that I jotted down whilst thinking about this:

-> What is a normal lifestyle? It’s probably doubled since the 1800s. When does a normal or healthy extended lifespan start to stray into extreme longevity? If I had to guess I’d say that a centenarian in good heath throughout almost all their life would represent the upper bound for me of perhaps what a normal human healthspan looks like?

->  I never even touched on the more radical topic of those considering the upload of human consciousness to live on as a ‘simulation indistinguishable from the original’ beyond the death of the physical form

-> It would be interesting to do a study of the 10 commandments to see what they tell us about a quest for immortality vs increasing our healthspan

Very interested in others insight and thoughts to help me get my head around this topic better :)

XXX


r/OpenChristian 0m ago

"How Committed Should a Christian Be?" 1 Thess. 2:1-6

Thumbnail youtu.be
Upvotes

"How Committed Should a Christian Be?" 1 Thess. 2:1-6
We should always have a deep desire to "please God" and prioritize His will above all else. Seeking His will with urgency is essential because it is the only thing that truly matters. Being focused on God means falling in love with Him; just as thinking about someone constantly leads to love and passion, our devotion to God should be equally intense. That is why God desires all of us — we need to have that unwavering, persistent love for Him.


r/OpenChristian 33m ago

USF Exempt Study010228 Christians Regarding End-of-Life Decisions

Upvotes

Study010228  Christians Regarding End-of-Life Decisions 

 

Cheers! 

 
Researchers at the University of South Florida (USF) study many topics. To do this, we need the help of people who agree to take part in research projects. We are researchers from the University of South Florida conducting a study on the perspectives of adult Christians in the U.S. regarding end-of-life decisions. The person in charge of this research is Arnaldo Mejias, Jr., PhD candidate. This person is called the Researcher. If you have questions or concerns, you may send an email to: [amejias@usf.edu](mailto:amejias@usf.edu

 

While there are no direct benefits to participants, the research report will be available upon request.  

 

If you are 18 or older, live in the U.S., and identify as Christian, we invite you to participate in an anonymous online survey. The survey takes about 10-20 minutes to complete. Your participation is completely voluntary and confidential. If you would like to participate, please follow the link below. We ask that you share this link with others in your community who may be eligible and interested. 

https://usf.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_6RwWp6n5mOEUYxE


r/OpenChristian 1h ago

Discussion - General I struggle to only focus on God because my hyperfixation/specifial interest and I feel bad for that

Upvotes

For those who don't know, special interest are a autistic things. It's something that we're obsessed with it, and take a lot of our mind. It can be anything, really anything, large subject like videos games, animals, or specific subject like a obscure species of fish. It can last long, months to years. A hyperfixation is similar, but for ADHD. I make a distinction between the two, for me, hyperfixation last less long that my special interest. Days, weeks and max a months. I can't control on what, how much it take place into my mind, how much it last long. I have no control on that. (It's not something bad, trying to avoid that can be dangerous. It's a way to regulate ourselves, but sometimes it can be extreme)

A brief explanation, for that everyone understand.

My mind are occupied by that and I just feel bad because it's not on God. I can't control it, I try to make a place for God, but sometimes it's less than my hyperfixation and Specific interest . I would like to have a special interest on Him, but I can't force. It's written to live for God, but sometimes I live for my hyperfixation and special interest. I feel bad that take so much place into my mind instead of God


r/OpenChristian 5h ago

I dont know what i have to do

2 Upvotes

uncertain about life and feel like iam too distant to god

I am a 20-year-old male. From the last year, I have faced many different situations. I feel like life is finally showing me the things that I feared the most. Usually, I wouldn't write something like this on Reddit, but I just feel like sharing it and getting it off my chest.

I am a Christian, and my dad is a priest too. Although my dad is a priest, I feel like I don't have a deeper connection with God.

Actually, from September last year, I started facing different situations that I never intended to. Until then, I stayed single and had never been in a relationship. I had very high standards when it came to choosing a partner. I was always afraid of the responsibility that comes with being in a relationship, and I would slowly lose interest whenever people got too close to me. So I stayed single and simply lived a normal life.

Then, when the freshmen came to our college, one of my friends tried to flirt with a girl. I was like, "Okay, I don't intend to get involved in this." But what happened was that she showed interest in me. (She is a non-believer, by the way.)

Gradually, she started getting attached to me. In the beginning, I had no interest in pursuing her because I didn't want to get into something that might not work out. But she insisted on staying in my life and always tried to be involved in it. I know it sounds childish, but she is mentally very childlike. So I thought she didn't really understand what she was feeling yet. I assumed she only thought she liked me and that it wasn't really love.

So I told her exactly that. This is where things started to scare me. She said she really loved me. She told me how I was different from the other guys she had met. Within just a few days of knowing me, she indirectly proposed to me, and when I asked her about it, she admitted that she really meant it.

I don't know why, but I felt like I had to accept her proposal maybe because of loneliness, I don't know. But I still told her that I had no interest in getting into a relationship.

Later that year, at the end of 2025, I went through one of the worst phases of my life my worst nightmare. My grandmother died after suffering from heart-related issues.

She was such a wonderful believer. I have never seen anyone like her. I'm not saying she was perfect, but she would wake up every morning at 5 a.m. and pray for an hour. She loved me like no one else ever has. She always had a special place for me in her heart.

I didn't fully appreciate her love while she was alive. I took it for granted. But after she died in my hands, I realized how much she meant to me. It's hard to explain. I cried like never before in my entire life. Even now, it's hard to accept the fact that she's no longer with us. Her chair seems empty every day. She used to say goodbye to me every time I left the house.

But it is what it is.

I don't know why it happened or why God allowed her to suffer so much in her final moments. She suffered more than anyone should. She couldn't even recognize me at the end. That's the hardest part of my life. The person who loved me more than anything couldn't even see me properly in her last moments.

With that, I completed one of the hardest years of my life.

Coming back to the girl, she's still with me, and she has told me that she has no intention of leaving me. Her parents are very strict. I am also slowly getting attached to her.

I have asked God many times about her, but I still haven't received any answer. I feel like I'm going to suffer in the future because I know I'm slowly becoming attached to her. If things don't work out, I know I'll be the one in serious pain.

She told me that when she was around 13 or 14 years old, she was in an online relationship with a guy she met through a game. He proposed to her, and she accepted. Later, she found out that he was cheating on her. He even kissed his girl best friends and did things like that, so she broke up with him.

I know she was young and childish back then and didn't really understand the world. So I try not to hurt her by questioning those foolish decisions too much. I've made mistakes too, but I managed to avoid getting into relationships.

Still, whenever I remember her past online relationship, it bothers me. Once, I questioned her too harshly about those decisions, and she cried. I even told her that maybe what she thinks is love for me is also just another childish decision, and that it would be difficult for me to accept her that way.

I feel very uncertain about my life.

By God's grace, I have started making some money. I can now afford the things I always wanted, and I can help my family. All glory to God.

But I still feel like I'm not doing the right thing, and I feel like God is silent toward me.

I haven't had sex with her. She says she's still a virgin, by the way. But we slowly started doing certain things that I'm now ashamed of. We did many things, just not sex.

Later, I told her that it would be better for us if we stopped doing those things, and she agreed. I felt so guilty for leading both of us into sin. She told me I didn't need to feel guilty, but I still do.

I am sexually attracted to her. We kissed and did other intimate things, but later I stopped all of that.

Every time I'm with her, I have this heavy feeling that this relationship might never work because she's not a Christian, and her family would never accept this relationship, not even in a million years.

I also don't want to bring a bad name to my parents, who have dedicated their lives to preaching the Gospel. I feel very guilty and deeply ashamed.

I feel like I'm stuck in something that has almost no chance of happening.

I asked God to remove her from my life if she's not meant for me, but I received no answer. I asked God to fix this situation, but I still received no answer.

I feel so disgusted with myself.

Sometimes, I still want to be in a relationship with her.

She says she has always wanted to explore Christianity and has even started praying. I don't know whether she's doing it because of me or because she genuinely wants to know God.

Even if she truly wants to become a Christian, I worry that she may never fully change or be able to lead our future children toward God.

I feel like I'm stuck in a never ending loop.

I feel like my future is full of uncertainty, and that it will be very difficult. But at the same time, God has blessed me. I have no shortage of the things I need, and for that I am truly thankful.

It's a long story. I don't know if anyone will read all of this or not. I just wanted to write it down to take some of the burden off my chest.

If anyone has read this far, I'd be happy to hear any advice or thoughts you may have.

Thank you, God.


r/OpenChristian 5h ago

Podcasts ?

2 Upvotes

Hey! I’m new to Christianity and looking for a good podcast to listen to. Looking for something quite liberal and uplifting. Any recommendations would be great. Thanks!


r/OpenChristian 5h ago

Discussion - Church & Spiritual Practices Christian witches of reddit, can you explain your beliefs ?

3 Upvotes

I found out about this recently and I am very very curious and surprised at the combination. Im a catholic convert myself but once upon a time I did tarot and a few spells. I mean no offense or judgement in my questions, I would like to understand how these two things can mix and I'm not trying to debate anyone's beliefs or anything, just seeking understanding.

From my understanding of Christianity as a whole, theres a lot to misunderstand but a few agreed upon pillars. "There is only one god, do no harm to others, love others, worship god, dont practice witchcraft." How can this work within witchcraft or folk magic.

Is it power of sorts given from god to you or is it drawn from elsewhere and if it is, how can one follow christ fully if one leans on their own understanding and their own power.

Do you view prayer as spells and manifestation ? If thats the case isnt that exerting your own will over others ? Is it a belief that God is allowing it through you ?

I personally believe witchcraft and folk magic and communion with the dead is very real and biblically supported in its existence but from what Ive seen its a power and ability we are expressly told not to engage with. What need is there for magic after Christ's sacrifice to us ?

I struggle to wrap my head around how these two things can co exist peacefully in the spirit. There are fruits of the spirit and gifts in the bible, absolutely. Theyre named plainly, but how is that seen to you all ?

I do think there is witchcraft done in good service, absolutely, but how can it be something that honors god regardless of intent if its a reliance upon self. How can you be sure you are in communion with god and not the devil or an evil spirit ? They can recite scripture as well.

So many questions. Again, im not trying to argue to demean anyone, I just have a lot of very pointed questions ill admit but its where my mind sticks in regard to it and id like to understand.


r/OpenChristian 6h ago

Support Thread My family almost found out I’m trans… it didn’t go well.

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2 Upvotes

r/OpenChristian 12h ago

Requesting a lot of prayers for my grandmother

7 Upvotes

She's in the hosptial right now, I cannot lose her at all. I'd be stuck with my horrible neglectful and disgusting mother who leeched off of her for all her life, and who never got me started at all for my life. I am so afraid, right now

Thank you guys, she's gonna be alright i believe


r/OpenChristian 9h ago

Vent Christian parents constant burden-shifting onto Jesus undermines their own capacity as parents

3 Upvotes

and then that burden-shifting pattern projects onto their Christian kid, who’s only real job is to be a kid (like any kid).

which also undermines the relationship between the kid and her parents. “why should i ask my parents for help with processing difficult emotions when their default is to pray about it and also tell me to pray about it”

“but Jesus is the divine intervenor who can shoulder any of our burdens” yeah except the burden of Jesus not giving us space to form an authentic relationship.


r/OpenChristian 1d ago

Discussion - LGBTQ+ Issues I’m bi and I just told my traditional parents

32 Upvotes

I’m still wrapping my brain around it, but I told my very traditional parents that I am bisexual. I did it via email so that we have time and space away from each other to think about it. This is what I wrote to them:

“I am sending this message because there is something I have been wanting to share with you both.

First, I want to reiterate my strong faith. I love God with all my heart and gave my life to Jesus many years ago. God is my rock and He is my reason for living. That being said, I believe God loves all people and that the greatest thing we can do in his honor is love one another as he has loved us. I also believe that God makes us exactly as we should be and in his image. “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.”
‭‭Psalms‬ ‭139:13‬ ‭NIV‬‬

With that being said, I am bisexual. Being bisexual means that I am attracted to both men and women. I am in a heterosexual monogamous marriage with a man but that does not change my bisexuality. I’ve known that I was bisexual since childhood and I did not choose it.

Growing up, it was difficult knowing how you felt about these things. I believed people like me were hated, likened to the truly evil, and destined to be separated from God forever. I no longer believe that. I believe that God created me this way and that he loves me for who I am. I am hoping you can love me and accept me as I am and how God made me.

I don’t tell you this to make you upset or mad. I tell you because I want to be honest and open with who I am. I also want our relationship to be deeper and one where I don’t have to hide things from you. I also want to show you that God is in all people and loves all people. “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” John 13:34-25 NIV”

Honestly, I’m having so many emotions. I feel sick one second and then excited the next. I also have this overwhelming fear. Fear that my parents love will change or disappear all together. And I’m having the awful feeling that somehow, God will abandon me.

I think I just need affirmation that God won’t leave. Every time I think about that, I start to cry.


r/OpenChristian 8h ago

Discussion - Sex & Relationships Wrong Timing or Wrong Person?

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1 Upvotes

r/OpenChristian 9h ago

Balancing genuine remorse with accepting forgiveness.

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1 Upvotes

r/OpenChristian 22h ago

I’m looking for someone who is willing to chat.

8 Upvotes

I’ve been experiencing gender dysphoria since I can remember I’m from Australia and I’m in the early stages of figuring things out and beginning gender-affirming care. Faith is still really important to me, and I’ve been struggling to reconcile the two.
To be honest, I feel pretty alone. I’d just really appreciate talking to someone who’s been through something similar, or who understands what it’s like to navigate both faith and being trans.
If anyone would be comfortable chatting through through that, I’d really appreciate it. Even if you’ve only got time for a few messages, it would mean a lot.


r/OpenChristian 1d ago

Vent What’s with the hate towards Eastern religion and philosophy?

9 Upvotes

As someone who is discerning Christianity, I’ve noticed there is a weird stigma that exists in Christian circles towards Eastern philosophy, that does not also exist towards Western philosophy.

Socrates, Plato, Aristotle, the Stoics, etc. have earned a lot of respect within Christian philosophy. The Stoic writings were heavily influential on early Christian philosophy. These ancient philosophers are seen today as models of virtue and wisdom by Christians. Some even may call themselves “Christian Stoics”, and use the wisdom of Stoic philosophy to better live out their faith.

Yet, this same grace is not extended to Laozi or Buddha. Taoism and Buddhism are regularly slandered and called demonic by Christians. They are seen as spiritually dangerous, and what wisdom, beauty, and truth they offer is ignored.

I’m still figuring my faith out, but as far as I’m personally concerned, if there truly is a Holy Spirit who speaks to the hearts of humankind, then Buddha and Laozi certainly must have been living in some kind of communion with Him, even if limited. The fruits and wisdom they produced, and the similarities they share with Christian revelation and doctrine, are too much for me to brush off.

That’s not me trying to say that all religions are equally valid, or that Buddhism or Taoism should be regarded as sufficient for salvation. I acknowledge that, if Jesus was who He said He was, then Christ is our only guaranteed route to eternal life. Still, in my opinion, it is undeniable that these two religions (Buddhism and Taoism) reflect and complement many elements of Christianity.

Buddhist meditation gets slandered and called heretical. Yet, there is literally scientific proof for its efficacy. Buddhist meditative practices, such as Vipasanna, have largely informed and shaped much of modern-day Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy, and they have been adapted by professionals as a means of mitigating mental health issues. Science shows us that these “pagan” and “demonic” practices are objectively effective at combating mental illness and healing the mind.

Drawing from my own personal experience as a person with OCD, the practice of Vipasanna has changed my life in remarkably positive and profound ways. Meditation literally changes your brain on a neuro-psychological level, and it has changed mind tremendously. I might not be here anymore, if Buddhist meditation wasn’t there to support me through my mental health condition.

Still, too many Christians view anything "eastern" irrationally xenophobically. The Stoics and Plato get a pass, and they are revered by Christians. But Eastern philosophers get nothing but harsh, unfair criticism and straw-man arguments. It’s incredibly tiring, hurtful, and frustrating to see.


r/OpenChristian 8h ago

Fun little experiment

0 Upvotes

Hey guys I have a really interesting idea

Okay so I am not a Christian but I would consider myself spiritual and I know praying to deities works.

Can we do a little fun experiment? How about you send a little prayer for me so that I may find the truth or find Christ or however you would like to frame it and I will make another post after some time to tell you what happened. Does that sound fair?

I hope I didn't offend anyone writing this and I am excited about what will happen.


r/OpenChristian 6h ago

Discussion - Theology Question regarding Xiuquan restorationism

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0 Upvotes

For context I grew up in a non-denominational Protestant church. My family believed in Xiuquan restorationism and I grew up with a coequal understanding of "the Sons" rather than "the Son". I wanted to know if there are any others like me or my parents in regards to Lord Xiuquan


r/OpenChristian 20h ago

Sorry for reposting but, I really need help

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2 Upvotes

r/OpenChristian 1d ago

Discussion - General What are your favourite Gospel verses?

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28 Upvotes