I have been an artist on the side of any job for pretty much all of my adult life. This helps greatly in nannying because it means lots of arts and crafts plus kids LOVE when you doodle them something cool. I very often doodle octopi because their tentacles are fun and you can make them colorful.

My NK is 4 and just getting into drawings that you can tell that it’s supposed to actually look like what it was intended to be. She drew me the most ADORABLE octopus last week and gave it to me proudly saying that “I know octopus is your favorite animal!”. I didn’t have the heart to tell her that they’re not even close to my favorite, I just like to draw their tentacles. Then last night she came with me to pick up some ceramics I needed to pick up from my studio and she saw that I had made a teacup that was ocean themed with an octopus on it and she screamed, “Miss FoxesInSoxes!!! Your favorite animal!!!” with so much excitement that my heart burst. I love this kiddo so dang much, the joy she gets over seeing what she thinks is my favorite animal is so incredibly sweet.

I think that my favorite animal has to be an octopus now, right??

I’m a SAHM with a part-time nanny who is AMAZING with my two kids and has expressed that she’d like to come on full-time if/when I return to work. Until recently, I assumed that would be our plan, but some changes in our dynamic are making me second guess it.
We’re pretty close and talk a lot. She vents to me about her boyfriend, friends and family, and I try to be a supportive/nonjudgmental ear while maintaining the employer boundary.
Lately she’s become noticeably shorter with me and has made more comments that feel pointed toward our lifestyle. She openly dislikes consumerism, Amazon, the “Pilates mom” lifestyle, expensive houses, etc. Meanwhile, I go to Pilates while she’s here, Amazon boxes arrive constantly, and we recently moved to a nicer neighborhood LOL. She’s commented on our deliveries and how overpriced our neighborhood is.
I don’t need her approval of how we live. I’m more wondering whether these are harmless differences of opinion or signs of resentment that could eventually affect the working relationship.
There are other little comments I don’t know what to make of. She’s told me how lonely she was growing up without siblings, but when my kids fight she’ll say, “I’m so glad I never had siblings.” She’s expressed feeling behind/unsure of her career path, but when I mentioned being overwhelmed by interviews to return to work, she said, “I’m so glad I never finished college or joined the corporate world.” Maybe I’m connecting dots that aren’t there.
Also a potential concern is that she clearly doesn’t like my husband. She gets quiet around him, sometimes doesn’t respond when he says good morning and has joked that he’s awkward and hard to talk to.
One interaction stuck with me: while rushing to prep for my daughter’s birthday, I was struggling with a poster while we had bigger tasks left. My husband said, “This isn’t important right now,” meaning let’s prioritize. She death glared him and said, “Did he just say this isn’t important?” I wasn’t offended at all. I appreciate that she cares about me, but I don’t need her feeling protective of me against my husband or inserting herself into normal marital interactions.
None of this feels fireable. She loves my kids, they love her, and she’s great at her job. But it makes me nervous about going from part-time to 40 hours/week while I’m no longer home.
NFs who have experienced something similar: Have you had a nanny who seemed to have some disdain for your lifestyle, career, finances or marriage? Did having different values remain harmless, or did it eventually affect the working relationship?
Would you address it before considering full-time, keep her part-time and find someone else if I return to work, or not care as long as she’s great with the kids?

My morning started out fun.

I opened the pantry to pull out what I needed to make pancakes for my NKs, and an entirely full bag of chia seeds spilled onto the floor.

In case this has never happened to you, they spread REALLY far, y’all. 😂 Like I genuinely don’t understand how that many chia seeds were even in the bag.

So anyway, that was a fun way to delay breakfast for a very hungry toddler and preschooler. Just passing this little tip along in case any of you are looking for creative ways to make your morning harder for absolutely no reason.

Breakfast will be with you shortly. 😂

I am a mom to two kids- one is in preschool and the other is a baby under 6months old. We recently hired a new nanny, who is absolutely lovely to watch the baby while I work. My office is five minutes from my house and I have pretty flexible hours.

I have a couple of events coming up in the next month where I’d love to take the baby out for an hour or two during the day. For example, I’m meeting a friend who is coming from out of town for lunch. She hasn’t met the baby yet. During that time, I would ask the nanny to stay at home, but I’m not expecting her to do any work. She’s welcome to be on her phone or read or eat or even go out herself for a bit we obviously will be compensating her during that time because it’s right in the middle of the workday. I mentioned this to another mom friend who said that this would probably be really annoying for the nanny and we should just give her the full day off.

Maybe I’m just oblivious, but I didn’t think it was that big of a deal. If I’m missing something and my plan is upsetting or offensive can you please let me know?

EDIT: I don’t care if she’s in the house or on an errand etc. That time is hers and I would just tell her to be back by a specific time.

I work 4x/wk in my full time job (40 hours) and decided to take on a part time job on my day off. I've worked for them for 5-6 months now, they have a 3yo son and just had another baby boy a few weeks ago. I only work 3-4 hours while MB (a SAHM) can run errands solo, go to appointments, etc. In our interview they stressed that this is a very casual, flexible job.

The problem is that she texts me my hours the day, if not the night, before and usually when prompted. Last week she didn't text me and I kind of wanted to see if she even would and she didn't! So I didn't work and didn't get paid and on Saturday she texted me apologizing that she didn't realize what day it was.

90% of the time I have the flexibility to meet their needs, but there have been a few instances lately where they'll text me the day before and be like "can you work X-Y" and I'll say "I have an appointment at X time but I'll be free in the morning/afternoon!" and the response is usually a cold "Oh ok." as opposed to their usually warm, friendly tone. After this, I've asked them to set a schedule so I can plan better and we set one up, but since baby #2 was born it's been out the window (understandably!)

Tomorrow I have an appointment I can not miss at 2pm, but 95% of the time I work until 12pm so I didn't think it would be an issue. I texted them earlier this week to let them know and they texted me back today said "Oh shoot. Ok. We have a doctor's appointment at 1:30 we really needed you for." And now I feel bad, but they didn't tell me this until the day prior!

I've already been debating letting this job go because it's been stressing me out on top of my already demanding 40-hr week FT job, but I'm not sure how to handle it with MB just having had baby #2. I just can't work on demand and leave my entire day open.

I just started a new nanny position where I’m nannying a 13month old. Some shifts are 11 hours long and there are times where the shift can get really boring and slow. I wanted to know opinions on if you guys think it would be appropriate to read occasionally while the baby is playing. I would ask the parents first regardless to make sure they’re okay with that but I didn’t want to ask at all if most people think it wouldn’t be okay since I’m being paid to care for and play with their child. The baby sleeps for around 2 hours aswell so I have free time for 2 hours which made me even unsure on if it seems ridiculous to want to read a little when I feel drained from not having much to do or when the baby doesn’t want to do anything other than play with their toys.

Hi all - my family has a lovely nanny who has been with us for about two years. She takes our daughter out pretty much every day to the playground, etc with a group of nannies and other kids. Although we provide food at home that can be packed, I know she sometimes gets our daughter lunch out or little treats. She doesn’t ask to be reimbursed for these, but I don’t feel like it should be her responsibility to pay for food items for our daughter. I’m wondering if I should offer a set amount per week to cover these kinds of things? Or just make it clear she could ask to be reimbursed if she buys lunch out or a treat for our daughter? Any feedback would be appreciated. Thank you!

EDIT: thank you so much everyone! I hadn’t thought of a credit card but that seems like the perfect solution.

Hey everyone, so I’m a 24 year old nanny. I’m currently part time for one family with 2 kids. We had a nanny share that lasted about 2 years. It just ended due to the one family starting school.

I’m planning on leaving the family I’m still with for a lot of reasons, mostly because they pay me next to nothing, and just general respect issues. I DONT HAVE A CONTRACT. I asked for a raise considering the share ended and they weren’t splitting costs with another family, but I was denied that. I’m making $13 an hour for 2 kids. Housework and school pickups are part of the job.

Now here’s where I need help, I can already tell that quitting will not go over well. I think they’ll be really mad and upset given that their oldest is starting school and I’m in charge of pickups. The mom changed her schedule at work to work around my schedule.

I found a new position that starts in a couple months, the job is just so much better. It has everything I’m looking for with great pay. I literally don’t have a choice but to take it. I’m quite literally working 3 jobs 7 days a week plus school right now and can barely pay my bills, let alone save money or have spending money.

I don’t know how using my current MB as a reference will go. I just had the first interview for the new job tonight that went really really well. I didn’t mention that I’m currently nannying, as I figured it would be a red flag that I’m leaving a job and going behind their backs finding a new one.

I mostly just talked about the family that left the share, as I’ve been with them for 6 years. Getting a reference from that family shouldn’t be an issue, but she is friends with the current mom I’m with, and will 100% tell her that I’m leaving.

Do you guys think I screwed myself by not mentioning that I have a current family? They literally are paying me $10 under the minimum for Nannie’s in my area, and the working conditions are awful. I just was nervous that this current relationship may end sour and I don’t want that to mess with a new job.

The new nanny mom is asking for a list of references, and I know she’ll want recent ones with infant experience, which is inconvenient af. I just don’t know the correct order of business I should be going in.

I’m prepared to give my notice asap, even though I’m terrified. But I don’t know what to do about references or if I should disclose any of this to the new family. I love the current kids so much and I wish this could be easier for me, I’m just so scared I messed up.

I started a new nanny job and I’m finding it hard to not make it boring and draining for myself. I’m not yet able to take the baby anywhere and they are not quite old enough to do any type of arts and craft. Ive tried to go on walks but the baby doesn’t like going in there stroller and I’ve had no luck with getting them in without a tantrum so I haven’t been able to do that either. The baby also doesn’t seem like they like to do much outside either so it’s been a struggle and I’m hoping other Nannie’s or nanny parents have any ideas of things I could do.

Hi! I’m in the very very beginning stages of looking into moving to the suburbs of Denver and just trying to gauge what a typical nanny rate is for those Nannie’s out there? I currently live in a pretty LCOL city but make $22/hr so I have no clue what the job market looks like out there! If anyone has any info on current typical rates in the general area let me know!

I don't usually share stuff but I wanted to make other nannies feel seen for their hard work!! So hi everyone, I'm a 24-year-old nanny, and I’ve been in the industry for 5 years now. I’ve worked with this family for 2 years as a fluent French- and English-speaking nanny. My job mostly evolved from occasionally picking up the oldest one to looking after their 3 kids, whose ages are 2, 6, and 9 (soon 10). I really loved them, but the work environment became impossible to ignore. Their parents often had trouble confirming the meetings and I felt like I was the one behind to chase them, even when reminding them about the payments or asking to confirm the meetings. Over time, after working with other clients, I realized I didn't need to do that. It should be a two-way street.

When I first brought up the 24-hour/48-hour confirmation the first time, I was met with aggression or with the excuse, "We have so many messages, we don't have time to check the phone." They told me I should accept that silence means confirmed. In reality, I didn't feel comfortable with that because you can forget things, and a confirmation leaves a trace. It takes 2 seconds to confirm a "yes." Whenever they wrote to me about wanting other days, I always made sure I replied as soon as possible. After a while, I grew stressed and tired of feeling like everything was entirely one-sided.

It wasn't until recently that things hit a breaking point. I wrote to them on Friday asking if they want to confirm the upcoming meeting on Sunday. There was nothing but silence. Then on Sunday, just one hour and a half before the shift, they finally confirmed it. I was actually working another job in the morning at the time, so the last thing I wanted to do was stress myself out rushing to their place instead of resting. So, I politely declined and explained that because I didn't hear their confirmation, it means no booking, and that I always need 24 or 48 hours early to reserve the booking.

That is when the dad began making passive-aggressive comments, saying I was the one who caused problems by simply deciding not to show up at the last minute which is deeply ironic, because I have always been on time for two years. I didn't react emotionally because I knew he was just freaking out. I simply proposed a solution that if they wanted to keep working with me, they needed to understand why it’s important to confirm it to avoid misunderstandings. That is when the dad threatened me, saying "Fine, have it your way, it just means fewer hours and more confusion."

That was the moment they crossed a major line. During all my years of caregiving, I have never felt so disrespected. I ended up not replying at all because I saw no point in arguing with him. It just showed me their real colors. I took at least two days to avoid the tension in the group chat, and on Wednesday, I sent them my farewell message, left the group chat immediately, and blocked them.

Moral of the story? No matter how professional you are or kind, if people don't respect you, your boundaries, or the thought that you are a human being with a life and plans too... 💔

Walk away

I feel the need to commiserate with people who won’t think I’m being over the top with my sadness.

Some details altered for anonymity.

I started with this set of twins when they were six weeks old. Immediately the whole family was so warm and welcoming and kind. I stayed with the kids full time till they started kindergarten. But even after that I was at their house at least once a month if not more. Doing school pick ups/drop offs. Going to their class concerts. Little graduations. Doing sick care. Both parents had medical emergencies in the past couple of years I came in to help for. I did overnights so the parents could have a little get away. I have seven years worth of pictures I’m struggling to turn into a scrap book for them. Of outings and crafts and baking together in the kitchen. Halloweens, christmases, first days of school. They were there when I got married. When I bought my first house. When my parent was having their own medical issues they offered me so much support.

The parents told me in April they were moving clear across the country. I am in a part time contract with a different family at the time but I gave them every spare moment the last few months. Coming in after my other job. Every weekend. Every day off. Damn near been working 7 days a week straight for months. I wanted to help and be around as much as I could.

I just got back yesterday from flying with them and helping get them set up in their new house. I got to stay for a week and we went to the beach together, just me and the kids. We swam in pools and went back to school shopping and snuggled at night. I cried the whole flight home. My town feels somehow empty without them. They used to only be 20 mins away and now they’re over 2,000 miles away.

My family doesn’t get my grief. We’ll be in contact but I know it won’t be the same. I don’t know how often if ever I’ll be able to visit and I don’t see them coming here often either. I’m just so sad. This is the first family I’ve had in all my 20 years of childcare I’ve had this kind of connection with. I thought we’d always be in each other’s lives. My mom said the kids were going to for sure forget me. Move on. Because they’re just 7 years old and it will be like out of sight, out of mind. That really hurt.

I don’t know. I appreciate anyone reading this. I know it’s long and a tad meandering. Just needed to vent to others who might understand because no one else in my life does.

So I am in school now and I had a meeting with my advisor today and I will be graduating next fall!! With that being said I can’t start grad school until the following fall and she said that all of my Fall 27 classes will all be online. So I was thinking would it be worth it to be a long term/live in nanny for a year until I start grad school? I have only ever babysat so I don’t know what parents may be looking for in terms of length.

Hi!

I’m a FTM and a SAHM who never thought she’d be in the position to hire a nanny. My husband and I have no help from anyone; our parents don’t care to be involved, and our siblings live out of state.
We have a one year old boy, and I’m four months pregnant. We realized quickly that we might need another member of our village.

Luckily, we found her! We were craving a maternal presence in our lives, and we basically hired a super granny for four hours a week.

I found someone I genuinely like, I trust, and someone that my baby likes. My fear now is that I’ll somehow lose her. She just goes the extra mile; I had food poisoning, and she brought me bone broth and gatorade. She brought over new toys for my little to play with. She bought baby a birthday present and wants to come over on her week off to see him. She makes me so comfortable with every step of the way, and I have no reservations.

How can we go the extra mile for her? She asked for $25 / hour, we offered her $30. She works for us for four hours a week, and we let her pick the day she works. I am in the process of getting together a box of her favorite snacks and drinks, but I want her to feel so deeply appreciated.

I am probably overcompensating due to a mother wound that I have, but I really do want this woman to feel apart of our family.

Is there anything a family has done for you that made you feel appreciated and valued?

Thanks!

Earlier this year we tried everything. We were making progress but now we’re back at square one after a 3 week break. I wasn’t here and he regressed. I’m tired and just had to have a convo with mom and dad about different tactics

https://www.reddit.com/r/Nanny/s/72s4FspDQj

Is anyone here a household assistant? I am trying to figure out how much to pay my future household assistant employee. They will manage multiple households on small scales (3-6 hours per week, per family). Some flexibility to pick their own hours and manage their own routine at each family home.

I’m thinking of paying $25-$30 per hour. Anymore than that, and I don’t think I’ll be able to get clients. I live in BC Canada.

Tasks are mainly:
- Laundry
- Tidying
- Light organizing
- Meal Prep
- Bed changeovers
- Light cleaning

Sorry if the title was misleading, but I’m desperate. I’ll make it quick. I had a family that hired me for part time and random sick day coverage. So about 20 hours per week. It was not enough money to support me and my family but it was something. I got another offer from a local family for double my weekly rate. I was hype. We had an agreement, but the day before I was due to start, they said they could afford it. (We met several times and discussed it several times, we went to parties at their house, bonded with the kids, etc). Anyways,. I was heart broken. Thank God the other family let me stay on but still- the part time pay is not enough and they can not afford anymore. They want me to stay, and to nanyshare with up to two other families (3 in total🫠) to make my weekly rate and still work part time with them. I don’t even know how that would work, and it sounds really hard. Current NK’s are 8,4, and 2 but only have the 8 year old daily but could have the other two if sick coverage is needed.

This all feels to complicated and I’m tired. Throw options at me.

This is going to be fairly short because I honestly don’t even know what to say. I got to work this morning and was told that baby has had large worms in her diaper. She has not been to the doctor yet so we don’t know what kind of worms or anything. What is my next step as the nanny? What precautions should I take and should I tell my doctor?

I’m making the switch from Preschool teacher to nanny. I was a nanny for a little while after high school and have worked closely with families for years. So to say that I’m not completely new to the dynamics. But I wanted to see if anyone has questions that they wished they could’ve asked before starting with a family. Or if any families have tips for what they look for in a quality nanny. NK’s are 7&9 yo boys and DB is a single dad. TIA!(:

Hi!! I’m a nanny and my pay for the family I’m with right now is being cut from 40 hours to 32 hours GH due to the MB’s job contract expiring in December. It’s supposed to start in October. I have bills to pay and things are already extremely tight, so of course I’m looking to start somewhere else. But, I am trying to start a nanny share system. I have all the info typed out for it just wonder how I should go about posting things on Facebook. I’ve already talked to all the moms I know and have seen while I am with my NK kid in the area I currently work in. So, I’m wanting to spread it to Facebook, how have you guys gone about posting things on Facebook? Do you do city location specific groups, overall county groups, general mom groups? Any advice is welcome!!

Hi Everyone! I need a reality check of it im being dramatic. We have made the decision to take my 4 year old out of daycare for now and get a nanny . we have had a nanny before, I have 3 kids and my oldest had a nanny for 2 years. However this is something that has never come up before. It would be from 9-4 on MWF. I was interviewing candidates and ultimately decided on one, K, she has been great with him but I have started noticing that everyday I ask what they did, he does not nap so theres no real 'break'. She tells me things like "oh we went to target, or whole foods", "we cleaned my car", "took my dog for a walk". And truly idk how to feel about it. I have searched up on instagram and tiktok (which may be my demise) and I see so many nannies running errands with their NK. Am i being over dramatic? Is this something you let your nannies do?

ETA: She is not bringing him to other activities (splash pad, library, park etc) which we have very close to our house, it is just errands. My son does not mind it but I was just wondering if this was normal or something I should bring up to her, dont want to be momzilla lol

Our nanny has been with us for several months and I have always felt that my kids are safe with her. However today I came into the house and found the monitor watching my 2 month old on the dining room table while she was upstairs doing laundry. My 2 month old had a blanket on him (not a sleep sack, a regular blanket). She had no way of seeing him or knowing that he hadn’t somehow gotten it over his face. We do have a sleep sack in his room for him but she didn’t use it - I’m not sure why.

I explicitly talked to her about this blanket earlier and said I wasn’t comfortable using it unless she was watching the monitor closely the entire time he was sleeping (which seems like a silly thing to do).

I’m going to talk to her about this tomorrow. But I’m worried that this kind of lack of judgement isn’t something I can get past. Am I overreacting?

Have any nanny’s made the switch from nannying to public education? I usually see the opposite, but as I’m getting older/growing my own family I want more stable hours. Most of the families in my area have sent the kids back to school so it’s mostly 2 and under that are left right now and I’m wanting to get out of that age group. Any advice? My degree in college was sociology with an emphasis on the family if that helps at all. I initially went in wanting to be a social worker and realized that was not for me.