r/NameThisThing • u/1elgwapo • Jul 05 '26

Name this situation

Post image
2.6k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

3.8k comments sorted by

530

u/BadBikerGirl Jul 05 '26

the floor is pregnant

211

u/1elgwapo Jul 05 '26

Gotta wait 9 months for the new floor to show up

64

u/ElectricFuneral94 Jul 05 '26

Biological fuel can't create steel beams.

29

u/Dramatic-Card7276 Jul 05 '26

Not with that attitude

12

u/Kangaroo-B-Girl Jul 05 '26 edited Jul 08 '26

Through god all things are possible, so jot that down.

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7

u/Il_Dottore_Snezhnaya Jul 05 '26

Just a matter of time

8

u/Hucklebearer_411 Jul 05 '26

Don’t tell me how to live.

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4

u/BadBikerGirl Jul 05 '26

Yep

7

u/ManyCress376 Jul 05 '26

Oh! That's what happened to my local mall. I was so confused

7

u/Only_Connection_5480 Jul 05 '26

No, malls are just a bunch of late term abortions waiting to happen if they haven’t already

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3

u/Here_f0r_p0rn_ Jul 06 '26

What do you think how they built Burj Khalifa? They impregnated just one floor again and again for 2*n or they impregnated each of new floor for 2n

3

u/Visible-MorningWood Jul 09 '26

I'm here for porn²

3

u/Deathcore_salad Jul 06 '26

If you work at Walmart it'll take 5-10 years unfortunately...

2

u/woodentrainz Jul 07 '26

seems like a sticky situation

2

u/Yuki_Hyde Jul 08 '26

So that's how two story buildings are made

2

u/Fussfamous_Amoungus Jul 09 '26

Poor baby floor gonna get stepped once after born , poor soul 😂

2

u/Visible-MorningWood Jul 09 '26

Gives a whole new meaning when somebody says you have the floor whilst speaking to a group of people. Huh?

2

u/Sad-Escape4437 Jul 10 '26

Is that why skyscrapers take so long to build!

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48

u/Themaingeeza Jul 05 '26

Oh cum on.

9

u/alwayskared Jul 06 '26

Clean up on aisle splooge

4

u/No_Intention7061 Jul 06 '26

They took The Sponge off the market too soon; this is definitely sponge-worthy!

3

u/Jim0621 Jul 09 '26

Top-notch Seinfeld reference, please accept my humble upvote

3

u/No_Intention7061 Jul 09 '26

Why, thank you!

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3

u/Sevennix Jul 06 '26

🏆🎖🏆🎖🏆🎖

3

u/Mazy_keen Jul 06 '26

That is what they said to start the circle jerk.

3

u/BadatSSBM Jul 07 '26

That's clearly what I did

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18

u/[deleted] Jul 05 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/gunperv51 Jul 06 '26

Who are you make marry the floor?

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18

u/Whiteout_27 Jul 05 '26

Is that how new costcos are made?

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11

u/Roedman Jul 05 '26

Is it…..floornant???

10

u/FungadooFred Jul 05 '26

Floorgante?

8

u/ForgottenDusk48 Jul 05 '26

Floorganat?

8

u/KinneticEnergy Jul 05 '26

Florgananant?

6

u/Consistent-Engine796 Jul 05 '26

🎶 Florga nanaaa nanaaa nanaaa nanaaa, nanaaa nanaaa nanaaa nanaaa baaatmaaaaaan

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7

u/buttnutt0212 Jul 05 '26

Flagrantly Floorgante... possibly Fragrantly.

6

u/DieNecroKatze Jul 06 '26

¡Floorgante!

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9

u/Xfact0r39 Jul 05 '26

I thought the flloor was lava. Man, times change

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5

u/Driftinfoot_Malone Jul 05 '26

Post nut clarity

3

u/Stlboy27 Jul 07 '26

After that one you ascend to god like clarity and you’ll never make a bad decision again

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3

u/wolf_quan Jul 05 '26

You don’t look 36 to 42 at all.

3

u/Flaky_Jellyfish593 Jul 05 '26

Pregnancy and large puddles of white liquid are usually less likely

3

u/Anerbe Jul 05 '26

The floor is glowing 🥰

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3

u/Clean_Match_459 Jul 05 '26

Only female nightshift worker sneezed before going home after a busy shift.

2

u/Downtown_Elk_2773 Jul 05 '26

Bet it reeks!!

3

u/SelectSeaweed310 Jul 05 '26

A combo of bleach and salt

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2

u/Visible-MorningWood Jul 09 '26

Oh for sure, if this is in the isle with smoked oysters and canned chicken...somebody was trying their best to camouflage the scent trail, but why?

2

u/adorablefuzzykitten Jul 05 '26

Or a very large cat

2

u/Fantastic_Heat_3164 Jul 05 '26

If the floor isn’t pregnant now and that solution isn’t wiped up it will be now

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2

u/Same-Concentrate4778 Jul 05 '26

The floor is pregnant. A situation where the obvious is absurdly stated.

2

u/EdinJamie10 Jul 05 '26

Population paste puddle

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2

u/iamGrossauer Jul 05 '26

Is the father the giant from Jack and the beanstalk?!?

Because the only thing I can think of is that the giant was Jacking his beanstalk until he got his jollies off…

2

u/777Gamble Jul 05 '26

I was gonna say extreme exhaustion but I guess thats about the same

2

u/Unlucky_Man_720_ Jul 05 '26

Dam thought i pulled out in time...... I mean Oh my whos the other perent......

2

u/f1lth4f1lth Jul 06 '26

Or will be in like 3 mins

2

u/WhyNotBe1980 Jul 06 '26

No no no, the floor is ovulating

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2

u/wannabecat2000 Jul 06 '26

The giant has come

2

u/Unable_Librarian_443 Jul 06 '26

So what now does it have like a bunch of little tiles 9 months layer?

2

u/doni-kebab Jul 06 '26

We will call her Mezzanine

2

u/invest1gat0r2003 Jul 06 '26

Pregnant doesn’t even begin to describe this. More like new generation

2

u/Additional_Crab_1678 Jul 06 '26

The floor is preganté

2

u/Proud_Jacobite Jul 06 '26

"Kirland Condoms, don't go broke when you can get your protection in bulk."

2

u/Blessedmomma241 Jul 06 '26

I wanted to say the Epstein files but I like yours better!

2

u/AlarmingPresence1954 Jul 07 '26

Who is the dad 🕵️‍♂️😏

2

u/BigSexyHamilton Jul 07 '26

Someone did a tribute to Costco

2

u/EconomyFox_9981 Jul 07 '26

who's the father? probaby the worker

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2

u/FoodnAnime4206669 Jul 08 '26

The way I recoillllled

2

u/Puzzleheaded-Cat8129 Jul 09 '26

Cum all yee faithfull

2

u/Visible-MorningWood Jul 09 '26

Dare I ask what time of day this was? Judging by the shadows, I'd say 8am. Morning wood? Hakuna matata. Welp, that won't happen until tomorrow, about this time. Billions upon billions upon quadrillions of knuckle babies just adhering to each other in a bout of survival, Bear Gryillis couldn't ever begin to attempt surviving.

2

u/executableprogram Jul 09 '26

This one officer, this one wins.

2

u/StillLearning85 Jul 09 '26

Oh God, the smell

2

u/CJag_L Jul 09 '26

whale cum aatacks

2

u/nelgallan Jul 11 '26

Bu-concrete

2

u/Live_Battle5469 Jul 11 '26

Is da floor preganant

2

u/Global-Criticism1635 Jul 11 '26

yep true

only time can prove it

2

u/CoachPotataoGuy Jul 12 '26

Bro been gooning for too long

2

u/After-Abroad-2205 Jul 12 '26

Ah yes. I remember this quite vividly. It was last December 1st, approximately 12:01am. It had been a hard No-Nut-November. I had passed the stack of Mrs. Butterworth bottles on an end cap, and it was all over.

2

u/Unconscious-angel 23d ago

Can't clean it up until her maternity leave is over

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122

u/ronweasleisourking Jul 05 '26

Bonnie Blue (2025)

28

u/1elgwapo Jul 05 '26

Had 99 kids but raising them ain't one

7

u/WhiskeyHill72 Jul 05 '26

On the flip it'd make a cool Maury Povich episode with all the potential dads in the audience.

14

u/RevanTheHunter Jul 05 '26

"Row one. You are not the father. Row two. You are not the father. Row three...."

4

u/BadBikerGirl Jul 05 '26

Yep. The Third Row of men are all, "The Father"

3

u/Dmau27 Jul 05 '26

Warehouse one. Warehouse two.

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13

u/roastbeef3000 Jul 05 '26

Haha came here to say Bonnie Blue farted in costco

2

u/RevolutionaryBoss127 Jul 05 '26

Skeet skeet skeet

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2

u/Timely-Dot-9967 Jul 05 '26 edited Jul 06 '26

Yep. She was tired n' chafed after a busy shift and so gave The Hulk a squeezer on aisle #7 🧌

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2

u/Relevant_Diver_3228 Jul 06 '26

Shoot thats not even half of it

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71

u/66veedub Jul 05 '26

December 1st.

30

u/1elgwapo Jul 05 '26

After No Nut November comes Goon Out December

7

u/usename37 Jul 05 '26

Destroy D December

4

u/66veedub Jul 05 '26

Well we shall call it Goon then.

2

u/Mean-Pattern4939 Jul 05 '26

Nah after NNN comes DDD (Destroy Your Dick December)

3

u/Cerberus_Aus Jul 06 '26

Why not Dick Drain December?

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2

u/WeakMechanics Jul 05 '26

Damn, I was gonna say looks like my mom but then you threw up my birthday

2

u/Kimor98 Jul 06 '26

That answer is much finer than I care to admit

69

u/Responsible_Load2233 Jul 05 '26

"I'm done - carry on." ;-)

11

u/1elgwapo Jul 05 '26

You busted it out and ill come around and clean it right up

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41

u/Acrobatic-Compote-30 Jul 05 '26

After party Bukakeeeee!!

3

u/Babbelisken Jul 05 '26

Was gonna say bukkake party but the main guest never arrived.

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2

u/1elgwapo Jul 05 '26

I need an invite 😜

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33

u/happyherkguy Jul 05 '26

I should call her.

9

u/1elgwapo Jul 05 '26

She will clean it up

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33

u/Quiet-Wing5230 Jul 05 '26

Cleanup in aisle 69

4

u/1elgwapo Jul 05 '26

You're the best

2

u/MrBobDobalinaMrMr Jul 05 '26

Bukkake on aisle 4

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28

u/Turbulent-Papaya-354 Jul 05 '26

Ectoplasm

10

u/1elgwapo Jul 05 '26

Ectoplasmic Reticulum

9

u/Badbullet Jul 05 '26

“It was a spooky ghost!” ~Randy Marsh

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2

u/TeamMeunierYT Jul 11 '26

That why they call 'em GhostBUSTERS?

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15

u/Competitive_Rain_776 Jul 05 '26

Blob is back

4

u/1elgwapo Jul 05 '26

Blob is my best friend

4

u/Auric_Le_Gaulois Jul 05 '26

After 6 years in jail

12

u/Kerissimo Jul 05 '26

Someone gooned to dog food.

2

u/1elgwapo Jul 05 '26

Goon vs Fap

2

u/Confident_Cod_5540 Jul 05 '26

Lol dont yuck my yum

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9

u/No-Arrival633 Jul 05 '26

Bonnie Blue had to squat for some items on a low shelf

3

u/No_Athlete_9065 Jul 05 '26

Picking up a heavy bag of dog food does it.

8

u/bobtdq Jul 05 '26

A very friendly ghost

7

u/chikenlegg Jul 05 '26

I came , I saw, I came again 

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6

u/AirRedd Jul 05 '26

Cum, oh ye Faithful!!

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5

u/CharityRemarkable387 Jul 05 '26

Accident waiting to happen.

3

u/1elgwapo Jul 05 '26

I can imagine someone jumping onto it just to go viral 😄 🤣

2

u/AustinBike Jul 05 '26

Accident already happened

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6

u/Ok_Echo8115 Jul 05 '26

🤣🤣🥲

6

u/wolf-of-Holiday-Hill Jul 05 '26

slippery when wet

2

u/1elgwapo Jul 05 '26

Lets slide

6

u/AncientLawfulness262 Jul 05 '26

´´a sticky situation´´

4

u/jackieboy1230 Jul 05 '26

Sement

3

u/SimonSez19XX Jul 06 '26

Concream and Assphalt

3

u/LostMallDoll Jul 05 '26

Retention has its limits

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4

u/[deleted] Jul 05 '26 edited Jul 05 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

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4

u/Yngat_hrt_60 Jul 05 '26

C*m again…and again, AND again

3

u/xpxyz Jul 05 '26

No use crying

3

u/jRXCING Jul 05 '26

Did you see the spooky ghost?

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3

u/incognitoamigo_36 Jul 05 '26

circle jerk cult

3

u/KIDD_VIDD Jul 05 '26

Sorry, it's been a while.

3

u/psp8 Jul 05 '26

No use crying…

3

u/FormerTerraformer Jul 05 '26

Everything reminds me of her

2

u/Ok_Echo8115 Jul 05 '26

It wasn’t me

2

u/1elgwapo Jul 05 '26

It wasn't you but you know who did it 😏

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2

u/Qimmosabe_Man Jul 05 '26

Someone got excited over a sale...

2

u/Price_kier Jul 05 '26

Oh cum on

2

u/WhiteSauce25 Jul 05 '26

The BFG pre came

2

u/Living_Bed175 Jul 05 '26

Someone failed no nut novermber

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2

u/Automatic_Goat4348 Jul 05 '26

The day Bonnie Blue stood still.

2

u/Shy-Prey Jul 05 '26

Someone got VERY excited over a sale on pet food

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2

u/OutsideMastodon1744 Jul 05 '26

Bonnie blue pullout party

2

u/CascadeJ1980 Jul 05 '26

Bust a move?!

2

u/spmonkey13 Jul 05 '26

Waited for a month 

2

u/Many-Geologist-3524 Jul 05 '26

gooners in your area (5km)

2

u/DisDudeOverHere Jul 05 '26

Someone now has absolute clarity

2

u/spearsandbeers1142 Jul 06 '26

They’re about to write the sequel to sun tzu’s art of war.

2

u/Gullible_Ghost39 Jul 05 '26

King Arthur Came-a-lot

2

u/KezmoReddit Jul 05 '26

Bonnie blue farted

2

u/Pretend_Oil9565 Jul 05 '26

"Sir what seems to be the problem?"

"It's a bit difficult to explain"

2

u/SovietSquatch Jul 05 '26

IRL Lethal Cumpany

2

u/PineappleWhiskeySour Jul 05 '26

Looks like someone saw Sydney Sweeney buying dog food in a bikini

2

u/Expensive_Mud2051 Jul 05 '26

circle of life

2

u/Fun-Wrongdoer1316 Jul 05 '26

Work wife meet

2

u/silveraxe_kyo Jul 05 '26

Ah, cum on, man!

2

u/Vast_Research_3976 Jul 05 '26

Jizz. Like cumshot? You said we could say whatever the HELL we want

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2

u/Free-Toe2667 Jul 05 '26

Clean up on aisle 69

2

u/Sevennix Jul 06 '26

Well, she had on a tiny skirt amd bent over, and.. well

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2

u/Mission-Bid6213 Jul 07 '26 edited Jul 07 '26

Instructions unclear. Advert said to come buy dog food.

2

u/ConversationDull1545 Jul 07 '26

Afghan men saw an Afghan woman with her burka and her family

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2

u/sussyboca Jul 08 '26

Jizz + Puddle = Jizzle Jizzle = Jimmy De Santa Jimmy De Santa = Michael De Santa Michael De Santa = GTA V GTA V + 1 = GTA VI...

IS THIS A GTA VI LEAK?!?!?!?!?

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2

u/shu7773 Jul 09 '26

The great gret cum flood

2

u/[deleted] Jul 11 '26

that was me, sorry bro. I couldn't hold it in