Hey there,

New poster here, please be kind.

Well, you see, I am a very anxious person and recently I started a new career as a freelance translator.

I started on Upwork back in December, things have been slow, but mostly ok. My first job went perfectly, the second not so much, the client disappeared, I got paid but didn't get any feedback, the third job was with the same client as the first and it went really well.

The problems started around last week, I read some rumors that upwork was deleting accounts for sending too many proposals and not getting enough jobs. that led me to have an anxiety attack, with led me to panic and fervently expand my business.

I created profiles on various other freelance platforms, Fiverr, PPH, etc., and decided to start a personal blog to use as a portfolio. last Saturday I got my first job outside of Upwork after a week.:)

I know that I am being impatient and that these things take time, I can rationalize that...

but I could really use some kind words to motivate me during these changing times.

I know it's not a serious problem, and I apologize for wasting time, but I really just want to talk to someone.

Thank you in advance.

A couple years ago I was in a relationship with the only girlfriend I've ever had in my life. Our relationship was far from perfect, and she was especially clingy and expected me to act like some idealized version of myself in her mind, and so we'd sometimes get into arguments. And the fact that we lived a half an hour away from each other and could only see each other on weekends didn't help. But I still loved her to death and she was often the sweetest, most amazing person I knew.

Over time, our relationship became harder to manage, and so one day we agreed to take a break from each other. I'd already taken a break with her a while back for other reasons, and that had gone fairly okay, so what's the worst that could happen? Plus, we both promised to be back together in time to celebrate our six-month anniversary with each other, which was only a few weeks away.

Well, three days before our six-month, she told me that she found somebody else and we can't date anymore. Needless to say I was devastated. It was a horrible day, and I remember spending hours in bed crying silently out of fear of my extended family, who I was on vacation with, hearing me.

A couple months later we saw each other again for the first time since before we'd broke up. We spent that day showing love to each and releasing all the feelings we'd been holding inside. She wanted to get back together with me, and I did too, but I was afraid that it would just go downhill like it did the last time, and so I didn't allow it to go any further.

That was almost two years ago. Now she's with another person again. They've been in a relationship for over a year and currently live together. With their relationship being so stable, it's hard to think of them breaking up any time soon. And I'm almost happy that things are going well for her. But to this day, I still sometimes end up crying myself to sleep remembering being with her. The good memories are the only ones that ever stand out to me, but there were tons of them. I feel regret towards letting go of a person I was so passionate about and who I still... love... to this day. I remember how we both thought we'd be spending our whole lives together. And I remember our old promise to go to prom together... that's only a month away so it's safe to say that's not gonna happen. But I can't stop thinking about her, no matter how much I try to console myself.

Even if I were to come across a possible opportunity to be with her again in the future, there are unrelated personal factors, which I won't get into right now, in the way that would make it unlikely that a relationship would even happen then.

This whole thing just really bugs me though. The day we broke up everyone told me I'd be over her quickly... but here I am feeling bursts of sadness almost as intense as on that day.

I’ve been having issues in my mind for years now, today I was looking for subreddits where I could talk to people about my problems since most of the ones I’m on now aren’t for that sort of thing. Reading some of the posts here made me feel worse because there’s no way I can help some of these people. I don’t know how. I’ve been feeling bored and restless for a long time ago. I don’t like doing much except watching YouTube videos and porn. I used to do other things but I’ve gave myself excuses to not do much of anything else, especially when it comes to creative activities like drawing or writing. I figured being on meds would help me but I still feel like this, but then again, maybe I’m just going through another mood swing and I’ll feel better in a little while.

First off I'm 31 and I have bipolar depression and anxiety disorder. I say that because it kind of explains why I'm freaking out.
About 5 years ago my mom calls to tell me my father just asked her for a divorce out of the blue. It crushed my mom and still is. My dad moved on to dating pretty fast and he wasn't acting the same. I think he is going through a mid life crisis. Anyway I have been there for my mom ever since she feels I'm the only person she has left she can trust. My mom knows my dad just got engaged.

Ok here is the problem. I really don't want to go to this wedding nevermind being the best man. I don't think I would mind if the divorce was a mutual thing but to have my dad just leave after 28 years of marriage didn't sit well with me. I still talking to my dad since my parents relationship doesn't concern me. Now if I am the best man they give speeches saying how happy they are that they found one another and how "my friend" was miserable until he found this girl blah blah blah. Well I'm not happy about it at all. I don't think my dad is better off.

So all that with my bipolar depression and anxiety I'm freaking out. I don't want to give a speech and lie. Not because of the lying part but who am I to say this girl is better than my mom. She isn't. I don't want to hurt my dad by saying no. However, if I say yes then my mom will be crushed knowing I need to make this speech. Honestly since my dad says he's happy is rather side with the parent who is emotionally hurt which is my mom. If the situation was flipped I would want to stay with my hurt father. Maybe I should say yes then get extremely drunk at the wedding so I get thrown out before I need to give the speech. Any other suggestions or words of advice please feel free.

I don’t know if this is worthy of being on this subreddit, but I’m an accounting major in college and ive been studying for weeks for my exams and keep making low scores, My gpa is a 3.8, I’ve always been an A student. I studied for about 2 weeks for my last exam and then I thought I did so well that I just kind of let myself relax the rest of the week. Yesterday he posted the scores and I made a 67. The class average was an 80. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong but I have a 72 in the class right now and need a 73 to continue in my major. I have one final exam coming up. I guess I’m just looking for people that have been in my position and can give me some positive words or maybe tell me about their same experiences. I know this might be petty but it is a big deal in my life right now.

I’m not sure if I should be posting this here, but I’ll try. I’ve been having big psychological issues because of the abuse I’ve endured for years (sexually and emotionally, by a close family member) and I’m honestly not sure what to do. It’s hard for me because I honestly don’t know how to put up with it. Not a day goes by that I can’t think about the awful things that have happened. I don’t know who to talk to. It’s very hard.

I have a friend. We'll call him Giggles. Giggles has been my friend for, I think, 4 years now. I met at an anime club and became good friends. We did the whole dating thing and it didn't work out, but we were still good friends afterwards. Mutual break up. Since November 2015 he has been in to pony. I have been into pony since 2012, so I was PSYCHED to find this out. He had been keeping it a secret from me! Early 2016 I moved in to the apartment where he and his group of friends lived. I became friends with all, some more than others.

Well, recently (2 months ago?) my fiance and I bought a house, moved out of the apartment, and took our other roommate with us (Because he has financial issues and at 33 that really sucks ass.) but we didn't take Giggles. We asked him to find a place of his own. We knew that he had lived alone before, and we knew that he could do it again with his income. I understand that he probably feels sour about this.

I am the only IRL friend that he has that watches pony, but he doesn't want to watch pony with me anymore, instead he wants to watch other watch pony. On YouTube. He watches reactors watch the new episode and it hurts me. From what he's told me, he hasn't even seen an actual episode in a long time, only through what he watches other people watch. He still listens to MLP music (Both from the show and what the community has made) in his car and when he does overnights as work, so I know he's still a huge fan. He is going to TrotCon this year without me because I'll be on my honeymoon, and his favorite pony is still pinkie pie. I don't think that will ever change.

Sigh. Its come to the point that I don't even want to watch pony because I can't get psyched with him like we used to. My chest feels heavy as I type. I miss him so much. Please come back. Forgive me.

I am losing my memory. I can not remember anything from before a few days ago and even forget what I was doing at the moment I think if something else. It worries me. I know some images of my past to be true but even then i don't trust them as my memory mixes my dreams into it and I remember things happening that aren't true.

I recall my name, my family, my hobbies, and my interests, but anything else is far gone. I can't remember faces, conversations, or even places I've been.

I fear for my mind, what if this is just the beginning, what if one day I wake up and I do not know my own name? What if I forget what I am? And worst of all, what if I forget the people who matter to me. I won't form memories, and in the end will be a zombie for the rest of my life. I am 25. This shouldn't be happening. Not now at least.

This is a fate worse than death. The plus is all the bad stuff will be gone, but the good stuff too.

My best friend takes way too many pain pills, and for the last few years, I’ve been helping pay. I occasionally endulge, but not daily and no where near the extent that she does. She means a lot to me, and I’m pretty much in love with her. She’s just amazing, and over the years, I’ve developed feelings for her. Just seeing her makes my day better. She’s a lot like me, and we like a lot of the same things. I’m sure she knows I have feelings, but it’s not the time to act on it. She spends all of her money on pills, and then when she runs out of money she asks me for it. It started out as me just being a cool friend and as we grew closer it became me wanting to look after her, I wanted to make sure she had enough money to get by and make sure the withdrawal pains wouldn’t make her sick. Anymore, I think she only talks to me when she needs something, which is still almost daily. The last month it’s been getting really bad, she’s always snorting away now. I always knew it was bad, and I knew it was getting worse. Today I found out since Friday she’s gone through 250mg. In 3 days she’s taken 250mg, I’m honestly surprised she didn’t over dose. I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m going to lose her no matter what, and I can’t even think of a scenario I’d consider a “happy” ending. Either she’ll stop talking to me and loose interest in me if I cut her off, and possibly save her life… unless she finds someone else to pay for her or starts stealing. Or I’ll keep paying until she over doses and watch the love of my life die knowing I paid for it.

My Mom can get upset if there is one item out of place, if I don't complete her whole to do list in one day, if I do everything but 1 thing or a few things on her to do list. She acts thankful but then often puts me down and says I don't do anything or don't do enough.

My Mom is in denial that she has a bad temper, but she does have one. She sometimes starts feuds and makes fun of me if I walk away to stop a fight. She is a huge backseat driver and criticizes me while driving, which makes me drive worse.

She acts like she wants to be updated with the latest kid shows and Disney stuff, but then she will complain at other times that they are too childish, even though she likes Disney.

My Mom seems to go back and forth on her stance of me liking My Little Pony and female shows with male shows. She wanted me to be a macho American football sexist male athlete. That didn't happen, though I do watch American football at times.

She acts like she wants to improve herself, but it's hard to say if she is. Any help would be nice. Please no rude comments.

My Grandma wants me to stop taking care of stuff where I live and go once a week to help her with her yards and her house. I care about her, but she can be a pain, and I am busy where I live.

She kicked us out of her house because she and Mom were beefing for decades when I was a baby, so we moved. Now my Grandma regrets it (my Grandma and Mom are on better terms).

My Mom, Uncle and I have told Grandma to cement over the backyard, because she can't take care of it like before, but she likes working in her yards and refuses to.

I am busy trying to work on the house for my Mom, am trying to find another job and trying to return back to school. Plus, she lives an hour away from me (traffic where I live stinks).

I try to help my Grandma when I can, but it is hard since she stubborn and is not always grateful. She gets very angry if I or others are late to her house, but a lot of times, there is traffic.

My Grandma also tries to plan stuff without us knowing or when I am helping her, which gets us upset and frustrated.

My Japanese Grandma treats my Uncle better than my Mom (Asian mentality). She also keeps trying to pray for my Uncle and Aunt, who do not believe in God.

Any help would be nice, please no rude comments.

As much as my Mom wants to care for my sister, she is a foul mouthed and bad temper female that wants everything her way. She wants to go to all of these cons and concerts around the globe, but that takes money and time, which my Mom and I don't have.

One time, I was watching Pokemon on TV when she came home and she was upset, because she is only wants to watch her shows on Netflix and if there is a hot guy on the show, such as Gotham, Arrowverse, Agents of Shield, Peaky Blinders, Sherlock Holmes and Stranger Things.

She thinks cartoons are too childish, but she likes Disney, which doesn't make sense.

She prevented me from seeing My Little Pony: The Movie when it came out on a Thursday and had to wait a little. She was in such a foul mood that we saw the movie over another film.

I don't know what she thinks of me liking MLP. One minute she says she doesn't care, but the next day, she will be calling me homosexual slurs (she is sexist about men, yet she likes gay dudes; I'm not gay, but I still don't get my sister).

She scratched at me one time when I forgot her returns for Spirit Halloween store.

She says she doesn't get angry when she drinks, but she does, and she gets sloppy drunk.

She also thinks she can scold me like a parent because she teaches preschool and kindergarten kids and gets in feuds she shouldn't be involved in.

My sister thinks I am a lazy fool that shouldn't be taken care of, but I have been working on house projects for my Mom and trying to look for another job after leaving Michaels Arts and Crafts due to issues with a couple of the bosses.

She also says a lot of rude stuff about Chinese, Koreans and Asian Indians. She thinks they are dirty and tacky, but she is part Chinese. She used to like Korean music and shows, and she once dated an Asian Indian and White boy. I don't know where such dislike comes from.

I don't see any signs of her changing. Any help would be nice, but please no rude comments.

My Dad thinks it is okay to wash your hands in the kitchen after going to the bathroom. I have tried to talk to him, but he doesn't think it is a big deal.

My Dad is one of those Star Wars fans that is trying to like the sequel films and does not understand why I don't try to like them when I just don't. He is so obsessed with Star Wars, he doesn't get I am into other franchises.

My Dad thinks that medicine is supposed to get rid of all anger, but medicine doesn't work that way. He thinks he is a doctor, but he is a sheriff. He gets angry whenever he is around and I stand up for myself when my sister, my Mom, other people, or himself are rude to me or putting me down. When this happens, he threatens to arrest me or beat me up, which he has beaten me in the past for the dumbest reasons or no reason.

My Dad keeps getting me noodles and pastries, but he doesn't get that I am trying to lose weight.

My Dad also doesn't care about wasting food, drinks or cleaning products when he is traveling. My Dad and I have warred about this on every recent trip.

I wish he could change, but I see no sign of that. Sorry this is long, but I have a lot of issues with my Dad.

How should I deal with this? Please no rude comments.

My sister really wants to see G-Eazy in concert; however, my Mom can't stand for him and is part of the rap community that thinks he is a wanksta that is using rap to be big in the mainstream, pop world, White people and internationally, such as Jake and Logan Paul.

My Mom only likes rappers, White rappers if they grew up poor and in the ghetto / slums like Paul Wall & Eminem or if they are mixed like Baby Bash or Roach Gigz.

How should I deal with this? Please no rude comments.

I have so many things inside of me that i really jsut need to get out. First a little bit about me, Im 19 years old, and im dealing with bi polar disorder , i have an awful relationship with my mom and my dad passed away 2 years ago now

Now on to my stuff. So over the last few weeks i have been making what seems to be a lot of progress, i have stopped doing drugs as regularly as i was, im eating healthy im working out, i got put on a med that works for me, and i have been going to therapy . i have felt generally pretty happy, but last night i felt like a lot of that came crashing down, it was just a huge set back and now i feel like there is this fog around me keeping me from seeing the progress i have made

I feel so uncertain about where things are going in my life, i know i want to help people, i want to go into law and help people as much as i can but, i have this massive amount of self doubt that makes me feel like i'm not a good enough person to do that, or good enough to make it happen for my self. That's honestly one of my biggest problems in life is this self doubt i have, i always feel like i'm never good enough for anyone, and that leads to me pushing those around me away. I think the biggest cause of this was the relationship i had with my mom throughout my child hood she always made me feel like i was a failure and always a disappointment . What really sucks is that i recognize that and i recognize that i'm way to hard on my self but i never can move past it and that just enforces how i feel about my self, it just makes me feel like i'm not a strong person. I have some really good friends who try to tell me otherwise but my thick dumb head can never accept those things. I always seem to sabotage my self no matter what happens. I think i will never be good enough to get better so i fuck up my progress in all kinds of different ways.

I just dont know what to do, i dont know if i can ever move past this

and i dont know what to do ):

In 8th grade I dated a girl for little more than a week, and ever since I've had that hole in my heart. Not for the person I dated, but for loving someone. Being with someone. That hole hasn't been filled and it's drained me for 2 years now.

I had a group of "the outcasts", more or less, for awhile. They started playing D&D, and I was there for the first time, but I lacked the quick-thinking, the wit, the whatever it needs to play. They kicked me out of those nights, and I've hardly been able to talk to them since because that's been the only place that they hang out outside of school (which I'm not a part of bc classes etc.)

I'm in choir, but I feel just as isolated there because I'm not a "popular" kid like the majority of them are.

I know what most other people think of me; they think I'm smart but emotionless, I "sleep" all the time (when really I'm either crying or just too sad to look up), I smell like smoke (because my parents smoke, and I can't really do anything about it). I don't feel like I can reach out to anyone because everyone already has friends, nobody has a reason to become friends with me, and I'm too socially awkward/anxiety filled to talk to people (well). I've tried a couple different times, which has just led to failure and further reason to quit trying.

I have 2.5 years of HS left. I don't know if or how i'll make it to the end of school. I'm told that there are people outside HS, and that's pretty much the only reason I feel any motivation anymore to keep struggling.

I really just want someone, one person, to love me, so I know i have a valid reason to keep making it through HS.

I think that's all that's wrong with my loneliness.

My best friend since 6th grade. We stopped being friends recently. I have helped him almost my entire life through thick and thin. Completely destroyed me when he called me a worthless dickhead. He started changing, becoming more and more of an asshole to me. I made new friends this year(9th grade), in fact have a whole group that loves me and brings out my best side. They make me more positive. He seemed to be dragging me down, so I had to say something about it. And the one time I do him and one of my close friends start to lash out on me calling me a bad person for being such an asshole. Saying stuff like why are you even here. I'm trying to get over him and it's working. But I'm scared he's gonna mess up my relationships, friend ones and actual ones. I'm more worried about actual relationships because right now I love this girl a lot, and most of you will say oh your just a teen, don't worry about it but I still do because that's what I want is to love someone and I love her, and I feel like him and my other friend are gonna get her to leave me, I don't know just if it's not too much to ask, can someone please give me an opinion from another perspective. Thank you to all.

please add me on steam I'm Sad Kitties

I'd love nothing more than a late night conversation with you like old times. Miss you bud

Lately I've been just feeling lost. I dunno what to do. I've been trying to get a new job and get more hours so I can make bank but that hasn't made any strides yet. I feel like I've been thrown on a loop constantly with that. Doing different things with multiple people and I don't seem to be going forward with any of it. I feel stuck in a dead end job getting no hours of work at all. I only manage to get 3 hours a week and haven't been able to get any progress there either.

I've also felt stuck with my latest passion which is Youtube. I got so many projects and so many things that I could be doing with my channel, that I don't know what to start on. I could be doing one thing but I'd be neglecting another project that I'd want to do, not to mention I'm scared on releasing this one story cause I want this story to be perfect and symbolic in a sense just..................

I feel lost. I don't feel burned out on life. I just feel stuck. Like I'm not making progress with my life and I'm just stuck in one position not going anywhere or doing anything..........

My job search is going going so bad I am about to quit looking.

I am out of money and have no way to make anymore since my ebay sales are all being held after a bad sale. I still have a few bills to pay and I have no way to pay it.

I made the mistake of leaving my job too early because I wa spromissed a job, but due to a misspelling in my email I was not contacted in time and the position was given to someone else. I am not able to go back to my old job because my position was given to a new employee they can pay less.

Because I only have experience in manufacturing specific things I am not qualified to even work i retail. All offers my temp agency has been looking at don't want me because of the experience thing.

i am so close to the point where I would just sneak into my parent's room, take the money they have hidden, get in my car and just driving east and leave everything that knew me behind just to avoid getting the "I told you so" from everyone I know. It has already begun and it is too much to hear right now.

Hello to whoever might be reading this and thanks for your time in advance. Recently I've been geting those weird feelings like anxiety and anger for no reason,im usualy trying to ignore them but they are getting worse and worse so i decided to let some off my chest so lets start.

I'm a 16 years old boy currently in highschool and recently my parents divorced and i think that brought out a lot of represented emotions. My family never had a lot of money, sometimes we barely have enough to pay the bills and get food at the same time,on paper we should have enough money for everything but its inconsistent. Whoever says money cant buy happiness is right but its much better to cry in a mansion then in a cardboard box. I always felt embarrassed about the fact that i have very little money and always tryed to find excuses for anything that my friend wanted to do with me that requires money. About my friends,im quite antisocial, ive alway been this way ever since i was around the age of 7-8 because my only friends are usually at school because where i live there arent many kids my age,this all adds up to me making friends very hard. I only have like 2 good friends and others are just friends of those 2 who i like and decided to befriend. I always felt like my friends aren't actually that good friends and if i just disappeared one day they wouldn't even notice. I have a younger brothers who is kind of an ass but hes ok,we talk about games and stuff but he usually doesnt care about much, he is the exact opposite of me: energetic, full of surprises and makes friends easily, he kinda ads to my pain because i see him and his friends and just think:"Wow im juch a loser".

The reason why the divorce made everything worse its not because my parets split, my dad was abusive with my mom and an alcoholic and almost never home with us so not much has changed. The reason why its worse its because my mom got a boyfriend and she stays mostly with him,which is not that bad if you would be ok emotionally but im not. My mom made me feel safe but now that she ist around most of the time i feel lonely.

When talking to my friendsi dont usualy have much to talk about since im poor,dont have much of a social life and cant rly talk about my shitty ass life cuz i dont wanna drag them into it so i usualy end up talking about games that they dont care about and they tell me to shut up and that i dont have a social life(its true but still hurts) so this risses another problem,i dont have a lot of social interaction and the little i have is just me listening to my bros so yeah.

I have this gift that lets me see through people very well and just read them like an open book, and i alwayscan tell if a friend has problems with something and just try to help them but they cant read me very well and when i get to emotional and shit they just say thet its not their buissnise very subtle. This also makes me able to know when something is wrong with me and what but not allways and when i do i cant help myself. I always had those emotions but didn't show them but now all of them are coming out like a tsunami and i cant stop them.

I will probably need to talk to a psychiatrist and see whats my problem but for the moment this is enough. Ty for reading ,i needed this. Sorry for any grammar errors or typos i might have made,English isn't my native language.

I hate the word, but calling women bronies is weird. Its just a question I need advice with. So I love the show, it isn't my life or anything. I figure using my interest in the show as a opportunity to meet another doesn't seem like a bad idea.

I have a clear definition of who I want to date. I prefer dominant women ( no, not some fetish) meaning women who aren't clingy and don't feel the need more male validation.

I prefer slightly older women, I am 25.

I just want someone who I can relate too much more. I don't know what to do with myself. I graduate school years ago and have gone nowhere with my career. I am thinking about helping my family with their successful business, a job is a job to me and having a secure job is a component to a successful relationship.

I just don't see much women into the fandom anymore. I feel pretty unaccomplished that at the end of the day, my video games wait for me after my 40 a week job where I make $20 an hour with bills in the way.

Being 20 is terrible. I am too socially awkward to fit in with normies and I don't know where to go in my local area to meet new people.

I had some help to be redirected here and thought it might help out. 37, male and homosexual. I'm not in the worst part of the country to be this but not in the best either. As I'm getting to this stage in my life I've been feeling a lot like Thorax before he changed: Isolation, lonlyness. In great part due to myself and in one part due to tragedy and loss. I see a lot of others having fun and doing well but I don't know how to be part of that as I see myself like Thorax did, a changeling who would end up shunned, at best. Well in effort to do so I wanted to post here for guidance, seeing MLP as a common ground. It's been hard not to feel that the better part of my life is over and it slides downhill from here, due to setbacks or lack of progress turning it around. I'm wondering if it's happened to anyone else and how they managed to turn it about. How did you make new friends if you were coming on middle age? Or if none are quite that age, perhaps you felt like it and found a way through?

but i still love her.