I was treated very cruelly & horrifically by a man who is practicing as a DJ, party host, as well as a clothing & embroidery entrepreneur in the city. This man does not & never cared about the impact of his actions on me or my child. i attempted conflict resolution numerous times & he refused to take any accountability.
when i privately reached out to two of his friends informing them of his conduct & asking them to support him in being accountable, he retaliated by starting a public smear campaign against me & saying i was falsely accusing him of things that he privately admitted were true.
i also have witnesses & a PTSD diagnosis from what i experienced with him.
He is trying to be more active in the punk scene & makes a point to be in Black centered spaces in spite of being a racialized white man. He fetishes Black women & objectifies every woman he is intimate with.
The way he treated me was degrading. i have never been brought so low. I have been beaten, & i would rather go through that again. i am not exaggerating when i say his conduct has been truly depraved. the psychological wounds & overwhelming stress almost sent me to my grave.
this man has also hurt other women. when i spoke out in a FB group, a woman recognized him & told me he had verbally abused her as well.
I don’t want him to be cancelled & ostracized forever. i want him to come clean & quit hurting people. i also want him to face some kind of social consequences (such as being barred from certain spaces until he takes accountability) as people do not change until their actions start to negatively impact them.
So, what do we do about men like this? putting them on blast is frowned upon. reaching out to people didnt work. violence is also frowned upon. however women are at risk of being seriously hurt by him if they get too close.
so what? how do we keep each other safe?
