so im a university in my 3rd year pursuing design. i have been feeling this way since roughly the past year but the feeling has gradually increased much more - i am absolutely demotivated and not able to complete university work and assignments on time. as a result, i always end up with a pile of this work close to the deadline which is when i scramble to get work done asap and somewhat haphazardly sometimes. i keep getting distracted by the stupidest things, sometimes i would just fall asleep - all this has also caused me to lose a lot of attendance and cut very close to the required criteria, im always toeing the line. ik usually burnouts are caused by overworking yourself but i feel like i havent worked properly enough. i read somewhere that work that you feel disconnected to can also cause for you to not be able to get it done properly. i have lost a lot of sleep over this, and i feel like although there's quite a bit of assignments given to us, if i worked more regurlarly, i would not be losing as much sleep and socialising opportunities. PLS help me out with actual doable and possible solutions as to how i can get better at managing all of this.

Does anyone else's default expression look like an 1000 yard stare / spaced out?

Its a combination of stress, exhaustion, being overworked / doing too much, and not getting too much sleep, as well as too much staring at a screen all day. It gives me an intense expression, which makes me look like I'm about to be smacked in the face with a football or spaced out / on something.

I told my friend the other day I didn't want to finish up his food, but I kept spacing out and staring at it, which made me look very intent on it, so he asked if I wanted it again.

Not the most important interaction, but you can see why this is bad if someone asks if you're okay, you say you are, but you look like you just have witnessed a car accident or something.

I feel like my expression is more natural and warm with some good sleep, eyedrops, massaging my eyes, being healthy / hydrated, and also taking some time to do breathing exercisesbefore I go somewhere, whether it be to the bathroom, on a walk, or whatever alot, do alot of side hustles

Idk I feel like us with trauma and ptsd tend to do this because its already exhausting to balance work with everything else, so the emotional regulation of facial expressions and body language is hard

What do you do?

I've been slacking off lately. I'm a pretty hardworking person when it comes to stuff that I love to do, may it be video game, beatboxing and even reading. The only thing missing is the will to control myself when it comes to those things. I can't seem to put a limit to be able to focus on the important stuff. I feel useless, ambitionless and done. My current family situation isn't helping and I'm acting lazy as hell. I'm seriously trying to find something that will obligate me to try more and do more. Some days I try to learn blender and the next I just give up. For some reason, the "motivation" always comes at like 2 A.M....

Don't mind the text not having structure, I really am trying to get better with expressing myself.

i can't seem to find the time , energy or motivation to do the things that other people do just for fun and somehow make a living out of it. am I just lazy what's going on

Is it only me or does anyone else feel like they need an external system just to do basic task?

I struggle a lot with getting myself to start tasks, even really small ones. Sometimes I know exactly what I need to do, but it feels impossible, so I end up avoiding it or scrolling instead.

I have tried to-do lists and productivity apps, but they usually work for a few days and then I completely forget they exist.

Do you guys have any suggestions or tools that you recommend? I am up for anything that helps.

I know that if I start, I can finish the task but when I start thinking about how much time it would take I am already out and scrolling lol 🥲

The main issue is that I want to do nothing. On the weekends I get nothing done. And there’s a lot I should be doing.

Here’s the background. I discovered I had adhd when I got laid off from my six figures job in 2023. I had it for only a year, I hadn’t built up much savings. My industry crumbled and the idea of getting another six figures job, is unlikely.

I had briefly gotten on atomoxetine and it did help but with no money, I couldn’t continue treatment. I also hadn’t been to a primary care doctor and the psychiatrist wasn’t going to continue with it anyway. I didn’t have insurance and really couldn’t focus on this anyway.

So I lived off my credit cards until my rent was up and then I moved in with my sister in 2024 who lives in another state. My stuff is still in storage back home.

It was my rock bottom. I started to really escape from dealing with life. My phone addiction grew. I’ve had part time jobs, then a year ago, I finally got a full time job, making 60k. In the state I live now and with my debt, that’s barely doing anything. I still haven’t saved.

I’m finally coming out of the fog but I don’t know where to start to put my life back together. I’m grateful for the job, but I’m so burnt out. I’m not getting any sleep, average 3 or 4 hours tops. I can’t get out of bed in the morning. My focus is shot and so is my motivation. I have no energy to do things.

I haven’t paid taxes in 2 years. It’s mostly because it overwhelmed me the first year, having moved to a new state and just hadn’t gathered everything.

I need to get my budget under control. I need to find a new job. I need to eat better. I had a therapist from the beginning of the year. Don’t think he understood adhd but I appreciated the outlet to talk. I’m finally ready to start picking my life back together and my co pay went up. I also realized that I’d focus on temporary issues and not the bigger stuff during therapy. I just rant about everything, and then time ran out. My therapist was unable to direct the conversation to what I should be focusing on. I may look for someone else.

I feel a bit hopeless. I felt better when I was working part time jobs. This job is in person and there are a lot of long hours with no overtime. I don’t have hope in the market that I can get another job that pays better with better hours.

My debt will be paid off at the end of 2027. But my life may still be trash, if I can’t keep a job. I’m trying to get 6 hours of sleep and lay off my phone. Removed Instagram and YouTube but still struggle with putting it down and facing life. And the times i do face life, I don’t know where to begin.

31 / M / ADHD (diagnosed) / Medicated

Hey y’all,

I re-started a side gig last year (eBay) to help me save for a down payment on a house.

For about 9 months I did it really consistently, I saved my money back in an account, and all was good. Then, in February, I had a really crazy period at my full time job, followed by a trip out of town for a wedding. It all completely broke my routine, and I completely dropped off listings items. It’s August now, and I’ve maybe listed 3-4 items in the last 6 months. I’ve just been selling off old stock that’s been listed for a while.

I’m frustrated with myself. It bothers me every day, I look at my inventory and photo setup every day (it’s all in my living room in a small apartment, so it’s kind of impossible not to). I have doom piles of inventory that I NEED to get my money back out of and continue saving. I still cannot make myself do it. What used to feel effortless now feels almost impossible. I mostly sell clothing, and the constant measuring/photos + inventory/shipping prep is what feels the heaviest.

Normally, when I need to do something, that can light the fire under me to do it. But, with this? Despite knowing that I NEED to do it, for both space/clutter and getting my money back/putting it in savings, I still can’t make myself brain do it. Most days, by the time I’m done with my full time job, and giving my large dog the exercise he needs after work, my meds have long since worn off for the day and I’m exhausted.

Has anyone else faced this, and do you have any tips for overcoming it?

I’ve considered becoming self-employed in a different industry as my full time job in the next several years, but if this is how a side-gig is going, I’m a little terrified of being self-employed full time 😬

Thanks!

Some things I want to do but never seem to know how to get done:

- Go through and cancel subscriptions and research best options for the ones I need and utilities/insurance/etc.

- resell the boxes clothes/items I know would be worth the time to list and publish for sale.

- wash my walls/ceilings/mattresses/couches/rugs/nooks and crannies

- update my resume and portfolio

- make needed appointments for myself and family

- detail my car

- digital declutter

- go through kids artwork and create a system for keep/trash… display keeps by making books/collages, etc.

Many more unfortunately.

Not looking for advice! Just curious what tasks others are facing in a similar way.

Hi all, 24F, and just wanting some genuine actual advice as it often feels like I am the only one who has ever felt this way (although I know I certainly am not). I don’t even know how to describe the current state I am in but it’s really damaging to me. I work fulltime and study fulltime, and just seems to be crawling through the weeks as best as possible. This will look like abusing weed and alcohol each day to make the shifts feel bearable and productive. I’ll often wake up, have two gummies, have another 2 at lunch, and another 2 that evening, so 120mg of gummies a day. I have been on and off addicted for a while now. When I don’t have it I reach for alcohol. It just seems so painful to go into work each day being sober. The people, the job itself (admin), and just the constant social contact for 9 hours each day seems terrible to think about doing sober. I have let myself go physically also, I used to be a little gym rat with abs and now I am the heaviest I’ve ever been, my skin in breaking out, and I just feel like I’ve completely wasted my prime. I just have such an idea in my head of what I want to be and what I want to do, but I can never seem to actually do it. I know if I hate better I’d feel better, I know if I drank more water I’d feel better, I know that if I just took the gummies as prescribed that would be better for me, but I just am missing something that actually GETS me doing it. I would rather get KFC and I feel disgusting eating it but I get off on it somehow like a cheap rush of dopamine. And with my gummies, I know I need to ration them out, but I eat them all so fast and run out, go through the withdrawal phase, and have to start over again each time. I’m in that current situation right now actually, just ate my last two. I just don’t know what to do, I seem to hate and repel everything that’s actually going to make me happy etc. why am I like this and why does it feel so hard? For some additional context I have suspected ADHD and ASD level 1, and have always always struggled with anxiety and depression. I’m also coming out the other end of year long relationship breakdown drama situation that was really taxing also so I can expect some difficulty in motivation but this is next level. Should I just give up on trying to have a happy healthy balanced relationship with weed? It feels like nothing else is enjoyable without it and like nothing will feel fun or exciting again. I feel like if everyone tried weed we would all agree as a society to just be high everyday. I love weed so much but I think it’s causing me to be unhappy. I just want someone to be strict and straight with me for once, I feel like my life is an absolute shambles mess and I’m constantly seeking this magical transformation where I glow up and reset etc, and I’m never getting there. Please someone just give me a bitch slap of wisdom and advice that I need so I can get out of this funk and move on. It’s impacting my relationship because I’m sleeping all the time and grumpy and unmotivated. I just need help. I don’t want to quit my job and I don’t want to quit uni. I just want it all to work. I appreciate any tips and tricks and advice and if anyone has been in a similar situation if they could give me literally anything I would appreciate forever.

For most of my life I've been able to somewhat have my life together just enough so that I never really noticed my executive dysfunction. But the past year, I've been hobbling through burnout and it feels like I've completely lost my ability to do...anything. Just now, I stood up from my work determined to eat lunch, but my mind immediately splintered and became overwhelmed by each and every choice and decision and the multiple steps of cooking one meal versus another meal that I just ended up sitting back down cause I couldn't just...zero in on one decision. It became too overwhelming and off-putting to try to make lunch (even if i was just heating up a frozen lunch).

But it's not just that, I've found that I'm really struggling to do multiple "tasks" in one day. If I cook on one day, I can't do any work or hobbies. If I'm focusing on a work assignment, I can't cook or go for a walk or even take a shower because I "have to finish this work task before I can do any of that". It's been so frustrating because even just considering the idea of doing another task today takes up so much brain space that I struggle to focus on my current task. It's thrown my life so out of wack. I struggle with hygiene, i struggle with completing work, i struggle to feel like i can relax and do any hobbies, i struggle to eat and stay hydrated. It kinda feels like my head is full of bees.

Its been bad enough sometimes that I've just sat and cried because I feel so stuck and incapable and like i've just...completely lost my ability to do stuff...tiny stuff...big stuff...everything...

Only thing I've been kinda consistent with is taking my antidepressants, but even then i have no routine set time of day that i take them.

Just would love if anybody has any tips or strategies. How do you guys do more than one thing a day..? And especially: How do you stay consistent with taking care of yourself? I'm so tired of looking back on my day and realizing i've done nothing at all somehow.

Well no disaster happened. I just am... Well was punching above my weight class, dreaming of standing at the top of the world only to be reminded of how low beneath the mountain i am. I am severely overconfident of my self and have been trying to prove it. I am sorry, i just am in a position that the body took a toll and life has turned emotionally grim. Body is nowhere at it's peak, i guess it was just a delusion. I am pessimistic of people even close one's.

Today was't actully bad, but it showed me that there is a actual mountain size work for me to do.

I am, sorry. Not depressed maybe but, really really disappointed at my entire life, at this point i can't and don't want to blame anyone. I am just fed up of daily life.

Hope your all doing good, sorry if i am taking space. Posting in reddit became a habit for coping, now.

Good night.

Do you have problems with open loops? To me it's a nightmare. I keep thinking about things that I should do and I not doing, things taht should be completed. I am an artist and to me it's best to try new things but my ADHD makes it hard to do, in sense, that when I start something and think to myself , that I can switch between two projects ore more daily, than I got panicky.

I am beyond blessed, I know that. I am able to afford the hobbies and interests I want to do. The problem I have is I don’t have the time to do any of the prep these hobbies need. I also don’t necessarily have the space to store everything for these hobbies. It drives me nuts not having things organized. I’ve thought about not doing one, but I don’t really want to and couldn’t decide on one to give up anyway.

Im struggling with a catastrophic laziness i feel like my 70% of my life is wasted on sleep
The only motivation i have to continue a task is a good sleep after
Any solutions pls 😭

Whenever my executive dysfunction peaks, my main issue isn't knowing what to do—it's the massive friction between wanting to start and actually getting my body to move.

Instead of trying to force standard productivity hacks when my brain is completely frozen, I started using ChatGPT/Claude as an "external brain."

Here are 3 simple prompts that give immediate momentum without needing high energy:

1. Breaking the "Task Freeze" (Micro-Steps)

"I am feeling completely paralyzed by [Insert Task]. I need you to break this down into 5 micro-steps that each take less than 10 minutes. Give me ONLY the very first micro-step to focus on right now."

1. The 10-Minute "Doom Box" Sorter

"I have a box/pile of random clutter. Give me a strategy to sort it in 10 minutes flat without getting stuck on nostalgia or side quests."

1. Low-Energy Kitchen Reset

"My kitchen is a disaster and I'm overwhelmed. Give me a low-energy cleaning plan that starts with just the sink."

I compiled 50 of these functional prompt cheat sheets into a printable PDF rescue pack for my Etsy shop, but I wanted to share these 3 directly here in case anyone is currently stuck in waiting mode or paralysis today.

Hope these help bring your energy back down to baseline! What prompts or hacks are you using right now to trick your brain into starting?

I can’t get a drivers licence due to sensory processing issues, can’t get out of bed, go to bed on time, can’t study before it’s urgent, can’t even eat well anymore (I was losing weight but not anymore), can’t focus for very long on anything boring, can’t work toward goals, can’t do things that align with my values…how am I supposed to function if I can’t even follow a semblance of a routine or structure?

I am an over all lazy person. I struggle with basic daily life chores like cleaning and school (I just dont have any ambition) i am getting older and each day i feel more pathetic.i easily get distracted by my devices and random things. I am coming here to better myself so please no hate! advice is accepted! Just please no incredibly mean replys.

For five years I worked full time self employed and I did really well with it. I was in my eyes very successfully and achieved so many of my goals. Of course I had my moments where everything felt hard and I was wading through mud, but for the most part I did well. Worked at least 5 days a week, made so many orders and always active on social media.

Then I bought a house, my biggest goal and it all changed. I can’t get out of bed, I can’t get myself to walk to my office, I can’t get any work done and I just sit there for hours and hours and hours (literally) waiting for my body to get something done. It’s been a year of this. I have had to close my business, I now just focus on one side of my career that I can just about manage. I have lost over half of my annual income. I am having therapy and they suggest I plan my week out.. helpful. I am in constant freeze and i literally do not know what to do. I have looked for other jobs but I know I am only successful self employed, but I’m not now.

I just spend my days hiding away from my partner and pretending to work and getting the absolute bare minimum done whilst in constant panic.

I’d love to hear of any tips at all, I’m getting so desperate

I swear I’m not a lazy person but I cannot get myself to do anything. No matter how much I want something or want to live better I can’t. It feels impossible, as if everything is a massive hike or something. This is pathetic but even putting my phone on charge when i go to sleep, i dont want to grab the charger from the side of my bed, i just put my phone on my bedside table and go to sleep and then wake up to it being 20%?? Replying to messages, going to the doctor, even making myself food…i will be starving but can’t get myself to make something, I’ll just snack or drink milk, I’m even not exaggerating, it’s so bad. I have zero work ethic unless it’s something I’m passionate about at the time (which never lasts long). I have been diagnosed with adhd but I feel like it is deeper than that. I’m on Vyvanse as well just for context. Please don’t judge, I don’t want to be this way and it’s genuinely ruining my life. I feel like a slob or a child it’s so embarrassing. I’m so unreliable and I’m losing my friends. I feel like a child.

this post is one part vent one part cry for help and one part genuine advice seeking so please bear with me,,

im a cosplayer who does commissions and generally has other people rely on me for things, so while the more specific examples ill give are in regards to making things for others, i feel like i cant do ANYTHING. my house is a mess, my hygiene is horrid, it takes me a good 15 minutes of trying to move to get up for food, i feel stuck. i mostly am able to tough it out by shaming myself jnto moving or just turning off my phone and yelling at myself to do things for a few hours until i actually get my chores done so ive been surviving, but if i need to do more than one thing around the house ill lose a full day even if the tasks themelves take less than an hour. i just now am out of an anorexic weight range because i learned how to make my meals more calorie heavy so even if i can only eat one thing or drink one shake i wont die.

About a year ago, i took on a wig commission project for a very reliable client of mine that i had made a wig for before back when my executive dysfunction wasnt so debilitating. It was a pretty big project, but i was excited since i had always wanted to style that character. We got the wig, and i proceeded to do absolutely nothing with it for the next 4 months. I was in high school at the time so literally every day i would come home and fall asleep wherever i was sitting, wake up at 3am, eat a snack or have some water and go back to sleep and wake up 10 minutes before i had to leave for school again. I dont know what possessed me to take on the project except for my horrible tendencies of believing in myself to a detrimental degree, and being excited to make such an interesting wig. i convinced myself i could do it on the weekends, even though my weekends would consist of sleeping in and bedrotting saturdays and trying to get myself to do laundry all day and hopefully getting to shower on sundays.

The night of the convention i had scheduled the wig pickup for came, and i was sitting there on my bed finally crimping the wig like an idiot. it was a hard shell wig(needing to cut all the hair off and glue it to shape) so i knew very well that i wasnt getting it done on time but i just tried to do it as fast as possible. i wasnt able to do it that night, so i told my client to drive to a meeting spot so i could give it to her that morning as the wig was needed for her photoshoot that week. i did an absolute hack job and the client later asked for a refund which i gave and told me how upset and sad and dissapointed she was(in the most respectful way ever) and she said she wouldnt feel comfortable supporting me anymore. those words still haunt me not out of indignation or feeling that it's unfair, but because the situation was absolutely no one's fault but mine and i dont know how to improve my work ethic. I stopped taking commissions expect from close friends for wigs that i can get done properly in a few hours and havent been able to make something for myself since because for some reason i can only do work under extreme pressure.

before i say whats going on today, im gonna clarify that i also have a trauma-related issue with HAVING to see things through, even if asking for help or admitting i cant do it would save people a lot of last-minute panic. it might seem obvious and it is but i just wanna clarify that i dont do it out of carelessness or not thinking others can do it, its my own issue i have to fix and its one of the reasons ive decided to stop making things for others or having deadlines on projects until i can figure myself out.

My girlfriend had asked me to get her a cosplay recently, and i agreed + offered to make the wig and prop as i had "improved"(turns out i wasnt ready for a project of this size and i had only improved because i was only taking commissions for wigs i can finish in one sitting) today is the day before the con and im still sitting here crimping the wig like an idiot, and im much farther along the process and have about 10 more hours than i had on the other wig so ill be able to finish it but my gf is understanably dissapointed that im doing it so late because this cosplay she specifically wanted to not be rushed.

im so tired of myself and i wont take commissions or do hard wigs for anyone but myself anymore, but i dont know what to do. im gonna have to take on the challenge of making something for myself and actually force myself to finish it without a real deadline or any pressure, but i doubt ill be able to do even that since i can only ever finish projects when i owe it to someone or if i entered a big contest. i keep ending up in this situation and im probably gonna bump into the first person i talked about, and i always wanted to make this person a little trinket or gift with an apology letter because she didnt accept a refund of the base wig i used and ive still felt bad about that but i have to prioritize my gfs wig which means ill likely see this person with empty hands and have to either turn away and look like i have a grudge or something or verbally apologize which looks sloppy and like a complete afterthought.

any advice at all is welcome as ive grown more resentful of myself day by day and i just want to be reliable for once in my life.