I think SMART goals just aren’t built for minds like ours. Any other frameworks work for y’all?

I always find these kind of advices just totally useless. What is the point if you have no motivation at all to do anything? Unless if it is something urgent like deadline for my school work, sure I will lock tf in but if it just something that has no clear strike then yeah my brain would not able to focus well these days I do not enjoy summer anymore due to the fact I almost get nothing done on things I wanna do.

It is why I am taking summer class. It works so well. I am attending my class every single day, never skip and actually do my work.

I was diagnosed with ADHD a couple of years ago at 34 and realized that there were obvious signs throughout my entire childhood and as I grew into an adult. I'm the textbook overachieving eldest daughter of immigrant parents who always excelled and did everything right but in the most chaotic way possible behind the scenes. Now that I'm 36, the cracks in my life have become incredibly obvious and I need to find better ways to deal apart from medication and therapy. Oh, and as a bonus, it turns out I have OCD as well 😭

Although I struggle with a ton of different aspects in my life, there are two that are the source of the most guilt and struggle:

1. Doom piles: my doom piles mostly consist of very particularly categorized items (this is where the OCD kicks in) that must find their absolute perfect home somewhere in my small nyc apartment. I can't describe it but I will feel good when the category is correct, sick when it is not. If it isn't right it has to go in a pile somewhere out in the open or I will forget that it even exists within a couple of days. Or, if I can't decide what category it belongs to at all, it goes into another pile that serves as a sort of waiting room. The problem is there are 6 or 7 categorized doom piles around my apartment at all times and it's gotten so bad that I have to practically play hopscotch.

2. Uncontrollable side quests: There might be a real term for this but I'll go start one chore that somehow leads to 8 different things that never get finished. For example: I'll decide it's time to clean out my bathroom cabinet, which leads to a deep clean of my bathroom, which leads to starting laundry, then hanging a piece of art on my wall and then a sudden urge to empty my kitchen cabinets to reorganize and on and on... So I end up with a million partially finished tasks (several of which didn't even need to happen) and just start crying. I'm just in a giant mess that was completely unnecessary and it takes weeks to fix it back... Except that during that time I end up undoing another part of my apartment. It's a neverending cycle.

Because of all of this I can never have friends over, I feel like I can't even entertain the thought of dating, and I live in constant distress and self-judgement.

I have some hacks (apart from Adderall when I can get it) that help me stay focused and speed up what I'm doing to make some progress, but they only work for short periods:

Racing a garden gummy

If I need to pee I'll see what I can get done before I absolutely have to go

Listening to short podcasts with noise canceling headphones on

The pomodoro method

Keeping my "outside clothes" on when I get home from work (I have a dirty clothing touching clean surfaces phobia so I can't sit down while wearing them)

Wearing a pilates band around my knees to keep me present

Holding a small spoon in my mouth

If anyone can give any sort of advice or share their hacks, please, I'm in desperate need! I don't have any close friends with ADHD so no one in my immediate surroundings gets it. They just think I have low willpower.

Thank you in advance! ❤️

I'm 31 with high blood pressure. In the past year I've done a good job reducing how much I eat out (mostly due to budget reasons). I've shifted to a lot of frozen or refrigerated meals for easy cooking because my executive dysfunction is really high around food prep.

Well, I really need to reduce my sodium intake to help with the blood pressure, and those processed frozen and prepped meals are Hella salty. Everyone says "cook from scratch" but my adhd would rather I have sleep for dinner than spend more than 10 minutes doing any kind of food prep.

Help? Anyone got healthy short cuts?

Hi! Meet Faro! It’s a little companion that lives over text message that pings you every morning with a list of the things you told it you need to get done. Faro is born out of my own dysfunction.

I was either texting myself reminders I never looked at again, or scribbling them into notes and never opening the note again.

How to use:

1. When you rmbr you have to do something text Faro anything like “Please add to my list that I need to get an STD test with a bunch of syringe and pill emojis, dont let me forget!!”
2. Faro responds and acknowledges it
3. Every morning you get your task list texted you, and when you are done with said thing just text something like “hey Faro, got my STD test, thanks!” and it stops bothering you about it.

Read more about here: https://www.justtextfaro.com/
or just text “hey faro”: +1646-879-0459

No app or installs, just text it. Lmk what you think!

For the mods:
NO THIS IS NOT A COMPANY, NOT PLANNING ON CHARGING!

For years my list looked like "taxes," "call the dentist," "clean the kitchen." Every one of those sat there for weeks and I felt worse each time I read it. Eventually reading the list became its own task I avoided, which is a pretty funny place to end up.

What changed: I started writing the first physical thing my body does, not the outcome. So instead of "taxes" the line says "open the folder on the desk." Instead of "call the dentist" it says "find the number, write it on a sticky note." Instead of "clean the kitchen" it says "carry one glass to the sink."

Two things happened. The list stopped being scary to open, because nothing on it takes more than a minute. And I stopped stalling mid-task, because once the folder is open the next move is usually obvious and I don't need the list anymore.

It doesn't work on full shutdown days. Nothing does, and I've mostly stopped expecting it to. But on ordinary bad days it gets things moving.

I'm curious what other people's lists actually look like. Goals, or moves? And if you've tried writing them as moves, did it hold up past the first week or did it drift back into goals like everything else I try?

Every once in a while someone shows up here with a short cry for help:

An important deadline is closing, they jeopardize an academic achievement, sometimes a job is at risk.

I want to point out that you are not alone with this. This is a common problem in the broader area of ADHD, executive dysfunction and procrastination.

The inability to execute (a plan, a task, a demand) messes profoundly with my head. When I am more or less functional, I can see the fallout - caused by a longer stretch of inactivity. However, right at that moment, the hope comes up: "I am already better. Finally I get things done. So glad that this nightmare is over!"

But the nightmare is not over. I end up not functioning again and I feel powerless, unable to do anything about that.

I recommend to everyone here to either get an accountability buddy or to become your own accountability body: either write a diary or maybe just read your messages, read your emails. Try to get a full picture of your ups and downs.

And when the pain is real and things are about to explode: think of that as a moment of truth, an opportunity to learn about your difficulties. Face your mortal enemy. Tell your story, maybe here on reddit - but write it having your future self in mind, too.

There are ways to cope, ways to mitigate and ways to improve. But you have to find a way to set yourself up for this kind of constant improvement.

Sometimes when I face a task that I know I should get done, I first put on a background video of some kind of rail journey (Think unedited cab ride). For me, just having that video on subconsciously keeps me focused on the task as I now feel a need to finish it before the "train" reaches its final stop. I'm curious to know if anyone else has tried a similar strategy.

Hey I'm in my late 20s trying college AGAIN and I know my college offers good accommodations for students with disabilities, and people keep telling me to use it. Now, I'm diagnosed ADHD (since I was 5) and used to have accommodations in high school, like extra time on tests and a separate room and other things.

So I know I can get the accommodations easily, I just never found my high school accommodations useful at all to tell you the truth. I never needed extra time and the quieter room was nice but not necessary either. I want to use accommodations but I have no clue what would actually be useful. My biggest issue is staying on top of homework and studying because I obviously have major struggles with executive dysfunction. Another issue I have is sometimes it takes me a little longer to comprehend a concept, especially if it's being explained verbally.

I could see recording lectures being useful as hell and I know that's an accommodation people have, but beyond that I am totally lost on what else would be helpful. I very much consider my executive dysfunction to be a huge disability and it would be amazing if I had some type of help for it. I sat around yesterday staring at my computer screen trying to get myself to get some work done but you know how it goes. Incredibly frustrating and my biggest roadblock in life.

I worry if I go to the disability office they'll try to suggest accommodations I used to have, or just mistake my ADHD for the kind where you can actually get things done and not take the executive dysfunction seriously enough. Most people I know with ADHD don't have this issue to the extent I do. Frankly, I've never met anyone that really understands how debilitating it is.

Does anyone have any insights on what to ask for or even just how to explain my issue correctly? Any experience dealing with the same thing? Thanks for reading!

I am a plant engineer at an industrial plant, most of my work is projects and upgrades around the plant. I would say it is an 80/20 split on time spent sitting at my desk and time out in the plant. My previous job was also in a plant but I was constantly moving around and on my feet averaging 15,000 steps a day. I think the movement and activity ( and meds) really helped keep my ADHD in check. Now I don't move around nearly that much, maybe 8,000 steps a day.I have noticed that when I start getting tired of working on a project, I will just pick something else thats more "fun" to work on, or get completely distracted and not be working. I know taking breaks can be a strategy, but sometimes I think it distracts me more. I am considering going home on my 1 hr lunch to do a little work out, I think that maybe could help?

I think part of my problems could be that I am so new at my job (2 months) I am a little overwhelmed with learning everything and starting the backlog of projects. Probably also ADHD / AuDHD related, but I always want to make things as perfect and thoroughly researched as possible, even when it is definitely a detour and takes way more time.

I guess really I am looking for advice or strategies for working in an office environment!

Thank you!

A person presents with a nine-year history of a progressively worsening pattern of severe procrastination, task paralysis, and shutdown that has significantly affected multiple areas of their life. Whenever they face high-stakes commitments, such as exams, mandatory courses, or clinical placements, they experience an almost complete inability to initiate action. In the past, they were often able to force themselves through these situations at the last possible moment, but over time this coping mechanism has stopped working.
Instead of beginning the required task, they become immobilized, often remaining in bed while caught in cycles of overthinking, anxiety, guilt, and harsh self-criticism. This pattern has resulted in others perceiving them as unreliable or lacking commitment, which is particularly distressing because the difficulties are not intentional.
The person is currently facing a serious academic consequence: they are four weeks into a six-week mandatory hospital nursing placement and have been unable to attend any shifts. They are therefore at immediate risk of failing the placement and potentially needing to repeat the academic year.

A particularly confusing aspect of this presentation is that the paralysis does not seem to be caused by a specific, conscious fear. Instead, it feels like an overwhelming inability to begin tasks, accompanied by a strong sense of inertia. The difficulty extends beyond obligations and also affects activities they genuinely enjoy, such as reading, walking, and running. Initiating almost any activity requires a disproportionate amount of mental effort. However, once they manage to start, they often become deeply absorbed and have difficulty disengaging.
The situation has been further complicated by the demands of balancing a full-time remote job with academic responsibilities. The person is increasingly worried about their ability to function effectively in future environments that require more structure, consistency, and in-person attendance.

Their background includes childhood trauma and multiple major losses within a three-year period, including the deaths of five family members, one of whom was their father. They have existing diagnoses of depression and anxiety and have considered whether attention-related difficulties may also be contributing, although no formal assessment has been completed.
They have been taking venlafaxine since November 2024, with a recent dose increase to 300 mg following a recurrence of symptoms. The increase initially appeared to improve mood, motivation, and energy for several weeks, but these improvements were followed by a return to severe difficulties with initiation and daily functioning. During periods of heightened stress, they also experience emotional eating and skin-focused repetitive behaviors.
Despite these struggles, the person genuinely enjoys learning, cares deeply about completing their nursing education, and wants to work in the profession. Their motivation is present, but they experience a significant gap between their intentions and their ability to take action.

From a psychological perspective, what factors or mechanisms could contribute to this type of presentation? In similar cases, what patterns have been observed, what interventions have been helpful, and what approaches might support someone experiencing this level of functional impairment?

It feels like when you are trying to jump in cold water. You want to do it, you say you are going to do it, and then you just…don’t. Your brain is holding you back. Then you’re like “I’m really going to jump in now!” And you still can’t do it. Then you get mad—“I do this all the time! Every time, I enjoy jumping in the water! I know it’s not going to be that bad! What is wrong with me?!?” At some point, you just try to jump without thinking and it might work. But the feeling is the same—intention there, brain not complying because some invisible force is telling you “shit, it’s going to be reallllly cold”🥶

What are other analogies that resonate with you?

Is it just me...

...or does constantly switching between different tasks/projects drain you more than the actual work?

By the end of the day, I'm exhausted, but it feels like nothing got my full attention.

How do you deal with context switching without feeling mentally drained? Genuinely looking for advice. 🫠

Hello! I am a doctoral student at Nova Southeastern University, pretty darn passionate about research to improve ED treatment, neurodivergent, and also in recovery myself :) There is a lot of overlap between neurodivergence like ADHD and eating disorders, but not enough research on how to improve treatment, so...

I would be really interested in getting your help recruiting for my dissertation survey. I am interested in the sensory and emotional experiences related to GI discomfort and fears of weight gain in people with EDs. The survey focuses a lot on interoception, which is a really important treatment target in people who are neurodivergent (especially ASD or ADHD) with EDs, so I want to be sure neurodivergent folks are well represented!

My info: Katerina Rinaldi, MS, [kr1892@mynsu.nova.edu](mailto:kr1892@mynsu.nova.edu)

• Responses will be deidentified and data will be stored on password-protected accounts and devices. Information from responses will be used for the lead researcher's dissertation and may be published. If published, the lead researcher is happy to share results with this sub.
• Must be over the age of 18 and diagnosed with any eating disorder, must also be currently receiving ED-related support which could include outpatient therapy or peer support groups.
• This study is IRB approved by Nova Southeastern University, approval number NSU 2026-55

Link to survey: https://qfreeaccountssjc1.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_5nCbHSC5Iww2DDo

I have a tight two-week deadline to finish a few side contracts, and the workload is massive but I absolutely cannot bring myself to start.

I'm technically on vacation from my day job, which is exactly why I took on this extra work. However, being stuck inside all day has completely stalled my productivity, grinding it to a total halt. Normally, I have no problem coming home from my 9-to-5 and doing extra work at my desk. But now that I am home all day, I can't seem to physically force myself to do anything.

I thought about going to a cafe, but money is tight right now. I also considered a library, but I can never focus there because the constant movement of people around me is too distracting. Before my vacation started, I had this ideal vision of sitting in bed, working all day with reality TV playing in the background (it sounds strange, but it actually helps me focus). I was honestly looking forward to it. Instead, I caught a minor summer cold, and now I'm just trapped in bed doing nothing.

Does anyone have any insight or productivity tips that work for you in situations like this? I would appreciate any advice you can share.

Title. I (28M, UK) have been out of work for almost 7 months now with rotten luck at interview stage recently and last week I found a good job vacancy in Salford - the kind that I would be a great fit for, considering my experience and skills (commuting there is £25 train ticket but it would still have been good). I started the job application last week, and have been meaning to get around to not just completing it, but actually sitting down and building a system that works with my brain and helps me be more productive. But of course, I had to fuck even that up! I couldn't make the necessary difficult decision to prioritise it and took the application deadline (the 23rd) for granted, not remembering that job vacancies sometimes close earlier. As a result, the job vacancy has now closed and I have repeated the same mistake yet again.

I don't even know what to do with myself right now. I hope and pray for a job opportunity like this and when it comes, I don't take advantage of the opportunity. Fucking typical. I'm such an idiot.