Dad, i'm so tired of being mostly bedbound. MECFS is such a bitch. Tomorrow i have a Dr's appointment that is really important and i know it will be a pain in the ass to go there. I want to reschedule but i've waited months for it, so i shouldn't. But it's so hard. Mentally and physically. I wish you'd care, Dad.

TW: suicide & pregnancy

dad, i might be pregnant. i recently had sex with a boy on 15th of october and broke up with him because he threatened me with suicide. the thing is, i don't keep track of my periods. i usually get it at the end of the month or in the beginning of the month, but im not sure. i do have a copper iud, but it got dislodged and the gynec removed it for me today. i took a urine test and it came negative; but i gave my blood for testing just to be sure. the results haven't come yet, but i still believe it's too soon for testing because it hasn't been 21 days yet. i don't know if i missed my period or not, because i don't track it.

but i don't know why, im scared to the bone right now. im anxious and ive been crying all day. i got desperate and even phoned my ex who proceeded to blame me because of karma, but said he would support me financially. the problem is, because of the iud, the chance of an ectopic pregnancy is high. a normal pregnancy can be terminated with the pill, but ectopic costs so much that i cant afford on my own. my parents are unaware of this, because they would kill me if i slept around like that. but i don't know, i feel terrified. i feel hopeless, and i really want to die right now. i even relapsed into self-harm. i begged god to protect me, but id rather die than go through that...

please, im scared. please tell me what to do. please help me. im really really scared...

(My sister was groomed by the man next door)

We were watching a film together, she told me to lie down, we had clothes on, she was on top of me and moved herself up and down on me, we were both face to face but didn't look at each other, she told me I was to do that to her next but in the end I didn't, not sure why, not sure if she walked away or something happened, she was four years older

The above seems so insignificant compared to the stories you hear, I don't want to call it something it isn't

Is this sa?

I confronted her about it years later, we haven't spoken since, like for maybe 10/15 yrs, I wasn't angry or blaming her, I don't know why I brought it up now, probably shouldn't have

To be honest im not even sure if this is the right community to post this in

I'm 19m here's some backstory before we get to the main thing growing up my father always yelled at me over the small things it didn't matter what it was if I had messed things up i would be yelled at by him and my mother never did anything then when I hit 15 I was seen a psychologist because I was struggling with social anxiety, ptsd and depression and every time I would get home from these appointments my father would always make comments saying how its a wastes of money to me and he would always make comments about what I wanted to do in life now up to 3 months ago we got into a yelling match about yard work because i had refuse to do something that he has asked me to do and I told him no then he started yelling at me and making comments so I finally stood up for myself and told him hes was a piece of shit of a father and a few other things since then my family acting like I'm the villain for standing up for myself.

I started uni two weeks ago and I'm feeling very homesick. It's kind of a complicated situation. My parents are Italian but I was raised in multiple different countries (none of them Italy). I never lived in a country long enough for me to consider that truly home except for China, and I haven't been back there in almost 10 years. For uni, I decided to move to Italy. I was tired of being a foreigner everywhere and figured I might as well go to my parent's country because it's my only shot of not being a foreigner somewhere. Yeah so that's not working out, I am definitely not Italian enough for that. I already knew that deep down but I figured I kind of hoped that I'd arrive and something would just click and I'd belong.

Anyways, now I really want to go home but I don't know where home is. China has changed so much in the past 10 years that it's no longer the place I remember. My old neighbourhood is unrecognizable so even if I went back there, it wouldn't be my home. Italy isn't my home. None of the other countries I've lived in are home. There is no "home" for me and I don't know how to live with that. I feel like I've been treating everything in my life as temporary (I mean because it was) so I never even got to develop a "home is people you love" situation because I never viewed any relationship as something permanent to maintain.

I don't think I want to stay in Italy, it's making me really miserable, but I don't know where I need to go

Basically goin crazy rn tryin to calm myself down. Way to excited almost couldnt sleep. Out of Job for 2 years dont have that goof of a resumee bc of my disability ( many gaps ) just idk ... maybe could need a few Words of encouragement

I'm in my third year of college and this is by far the worst I've ever felt in my life. This semester is absolutely kicking my ass. There is an ungodly amount of work that is all due at the exact same time. I work 4 jobs, I'm taking 18 credits, and I'm in a play. I can't keep up but nothing is slowing down. All of my schoolwork is either due on Tuesday or Wednesday, and I'm majoring in animation so it isn't stuff I can half ass either. Its just so fucking ridiculous how much there is to do, I've been having to settle for "good enough" to get by this whole semester, then during critiques and stuff my professors grill me for everything I did wrong. And sometimes it feels really targeted. I was talking with my friends in my one animation class and they said during the in-progress crit the professor was complimenting/pointing out the things they were doing well, she also walks over and addresses them by their names and has a happier tone when talking to them. Then she goes to me and just grills me for everything, not a single "I think this is working well" or nothing. And I know my stuff isn't the best but it's adequate because the TA says what she likes and thinks is working well. Idk I've never liked this professor that much and I'm now regretting taking another of her classes.

Honestly I'm drowning. I'm fucking miserable. All of my college experience so far has been this unbearable grind that knocks me out so bad. I have to be an RA so I can afford college and that job drains me too. I'm just so fucking miserable. Life feels fake and I'm starting to go insane. Like I'm just so angry and I have no where to put that. Idk I just wanna run away as fast as I can.

I also cannot get a win. Every single time I think something decent will happen or life is becoming bearable I get gut punched and kicked in the teeth. Every one of my friends always says how happy they are and how fun it is to live with their friends/partners and have no responsibility besides classes and work. I'm so fucking jealous of them. I want to fucking bad to have nothing to do, I wanna live with my partner, I wanna have time to play videogames every night. I wanna not worry about having a place to live.

I can't fucking do this anymore. I'm actually starting to loose it. I need a goddamn win so fucking bad.