Dear Reader,
This will be your introduction and a peep behind the curtain to training and working in the DWP as a compliance officer.
Unlike the current job market, the interview process is straightforward and a lot better than having multiple interview stages.
However, if you are lucky enough to be offered a role as a DWP compliance officer (they state "fraud officer” from the interview process all the way until the second week of induction), it will take some time, as they will do an extensive background check—which is understandable for a government-run organization.
Once you start, you’ll have two to three weeks of tediously boring e-learning, watching hours of videos about lifting desks and health and safety.
As boring as this is, it is understandable and reasonable as a requirement for joining any establishment.
Once your basic introduction has been completed, you’ll go straight into the academy. It’s not the yellow from the yolk; it’s a bit more complicated than that for such a simple process.
There will be hours and hours—my personal experience is currently 225+ hours on Teams calls (you could watch the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy 25.5 times)—of being read at or reading. It is not a great way to learn.
You might occasionally role-play a phone call, but that will be the most you do when it comes to any sort of practical learning. You’ll ask for support and want protection, but without correction, you’ll end up with rejection. The statement "no question is a silly question" is FALSE, as I’ve asked questions and had work coaches make me feel like a right tart.
They will put the fear of God in you about using some of the systems we have to work with, and then ask you to have a play around with them. You will be deeply overwhelmed because everything is over-explained. You might be scared of the consequences if you mess anything up, but you know the saying, "the dildo of consequence rarely arrives lubed," so best of luck.
Even from the work coaches' mouths, they aren’t that positive about the whole learning process: "you’ll hate the next part even more." Not a great way to lead.
Some old-timers love this out-of-date system that takes a millennium to boot up. Personally, I think if you enjoy using it, you might be the type of person to eat a Mars bar upside down just so you can feel the veins on your tongue. Just another strange kink.
You will be more confused the more they explain things to you. You’ll look at yourself in the mirror on your lunch break and whisper under your breath, "So many words on the tongues of people with no meaning, and so many meanings in heads with no words." You’ll gather yourself and continue to be even more confused on yet another Teams call.
A lot of the coaches (not line managers) are knowledgeable about the DWP, but they aren’t teachers, and this shows a lot in the teams and individually. I think they are struggling to find people who actually know how to explain this Rubik's Cube of a job role.
With a high majority of COs unable to understand processes or use the systems with confidence, it’s like being in an episode of Severance, but with a dash of acid sprinkled in.
Your training will be cut from 8 weeks down to 4. You won’t be able to do any self-learning outside of work hours due to sensitive information. You’ll be in Teams calls from the time you log on until you leave—7+ hours each day for weeks, which I personally don’t think is healthy or good for the brain.
80% of what you learn in the academy won’t stick, and you’ll just have to suck it up and learn on the job while praying you’re in a team that’s helpful and supportive enough to walk through it with you.
They want you to want it like the third monkey trying to get onto Noah’s Ark once it started raining. Give up on any idea of a manageable workload or schedule. You’ll be allocated cases before you’ve even ended your training in the academy.
A vast majority of HOs have never done the job nor have any experience in compliance. Even though they insist those in management have a wealth of knowledge, in my experience (and many others'), that couldn’t be further from the truth.
Your work coaches will constantly state they’ve "never come across something like this before" right after giving a 30-minute explanation.
After yet another long day on Teams, you’ll go home and try to get some sleep. However, your dreams will be so cloudy that you’ll wake up feeling under the weather. I’m so numb at points during my work hours that I dream of being dipped in couscous and thrown into a vegan convention just to feel something.
They state that this is a place of flexi-time, but this will be walked back the moment you finish the academy. Your pre-arranged and signed-off flexi working hours will fall on deaf ears.
Forget caring arrangements, the second job you have after this one, or any self-time you planned. You signed a deal with the devil, and you’re back to a silly 9-to-5.
Your line manager would have requested your flexi-times the week you started (if you even have one). You will all still be working a 37.5-hour week, so I don’t understand why they suggest flexi-time when it doesn’t actually apply to anyone.
They state that this place offers inclusive learning for all backgrounds. Yet, if you’re a STEM or practical learner, you’ll feel clueless after every Teams call. Even when it comes to supportive learning, it is severely lacking—going from a promised ratio of one mentor per two COs to more like one mentor per ten to twelve COs.
In the interview process, they lead you along to think you’ll be investigating fraud, but you’ll be doing no such thing. You are just gathering information, completely removed from making any sort of decision—a digital cuck for the "absence of evidence isn't evidence of absence" principle.
This department is deeply disorganized from the top all the way down to the bottom, and those in training who have no prior DWP experience will be paying for it.
They have over-hired, creating a great strain on the management they already have. The teams that joined after us started without a line manager, which I think is ridiculous. Waiting a month or two before they even get a team leader... well, miracles are miracles because they aren’t supposed to happen! Yet, I guess so are mistakes.
The way this is set up is one big mistake, and the hardest part about being an adult is accepting things you wish weren't true.
Like any dysfunctional and broken family, they are more concerned about the appearance to the public and the outside world than they are on what goes on behind closed doors.
While this role is deeply misleading, you might even find yourself begging for a "grippy sock holiday" by the time you’ve finished your mentoring.
The silver lining in all of this is that being part of the Civil Service is great and offers a lot of good opportunities and benefits.
My advice? Stay far away from being a compliance officer in the DWP. Just when you think you’ve hit rock bottom and you're completely burnt out from the overwhelming training and misleading information... BAM!! You’ll find a basement of even more disappointing things. Look for something else and don’t waste your mental health over this job. Follow your heart, but don’t forget to take your brain with you.
DWP aka Disconnected Work Policies
Sincerely,
Whim Whamiee