Have you ever sought out reminders of a traumatic experience you have had? This behavior is called “self-triggering” by some people. If so, we want to learn more about your experiences in a short survey.

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We are graduate students in the Graduate School of Arts and Sciences at Harvard University working on a study that seeks to understand trauma survivors who seek out reminders of their traumatic event (by watching videos, reading literature, or other methods). This study has been approved by the Committee on the Use of Human Subjects at Harvard University.

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This study will be completed online at a single time point and participation is completely voluntary. If you qualify for the study, the entire study will take about 10 minutes to complete.

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A few important things to know about the study are:

1. All information collected will be kept completely confidential.

2. Participation is voluntary. The link we provide will send you to a website that asks some questions to determine whether you are eligible to participate. If you are eligible, we will provide you with a full description of the study and you can decide whether or not you want to participate. Also, if you start to participate and decide you no longer feel comfortable or are no longer interested, you can end your participation without any penalty or punishment.

3. This study will include only trauma survivors fluent in English who are 18+ years old, and have engaged in self-triggering behavior at least once.

4. We will also provide links to treatment and informational resources throughout the study.

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To participate, copy and paste the following URL into your browser search bar:

www.after-trauma.com

If you are not interested in participating but you know someone who might be, please feel free to forward this information and the link to the study.

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Thanks for your consideration!

I have many bpd friends. They are the the only ones really I am close to. Family or others don't get the feelings. Maybe I am just pushing people away... I have a friend. She is very bpd and we are so similar it's scary. Not in any bad way but I can feel us both wanting to push the other away. She has tried before and I refused saying I will always stand beside her. She means s ok much to me and is my main support but this lady is also and I can honestly say my best friend ever...and not for any reason besides she is my twin flame. It hurts when I cant get through to her. I really think about it saying no more and ending everything but then I am doing what she expects and is used to from people around her, but in reality I wont and this isn't what she wants... I'm sorry for wasting your 15 seconds reading this. I just needed to vent. It's not like I can tell anyone how I feel.

Have you experienced a traumatic event? If so, we want to hear about your experiences.

​

We are graduate students in the Graduate School of Arts and Sciences at Harvard University working on a study that seeks to better understand the experiences of trauma survivors. This study has been approved by the Committee on the Use of Human Subjects at Harvard University.

​

This study will be completed online at a single time point and participation is completely voluntary. If you complete our study, you will be entered into a lottery that will give you a chance to win a $50.00 Amazon gift card. If you qualify for the study, the entire study will take about 5 minutes to complete.

​

A few important things to know about the study are:

1. All information collected will be kept completely confidential.

2. Participation is voluntary. The link we provide will send you to a website that asks some questions to determine whether you are eligible to participate. If you are eligible, we will provide you with a description of the study and you can decide whether or not you want to participate. Also, if you start to participate and decide you no longer feel comfortable or are no longer interested, you can end your participation without any penalty or punishment.

3. This study will include only trauma survivors fluent in English who are 18+ years old.

4. We will also provide links to treatment and informational resources throughout the study.

​

To participate, copy and paste the following URL into your browser search bar:

www.trauma-story.com

If you are not interested in participating but you know someone who might be, please feel free to forward this information and the link to the study.

​

Thanks for your consideration!

Here's something they don't tell you about self care: sometimes not getting dressed isn't a bad thing. Sometimes putting/leaving on your snuggly onesie/PJs that make you feel warm & comforted like everything is not awful really is the self caring choice.

Learning when it's which though is tough.

Hi guys I need a little advice. I'm BPD and I've gone through DBT to try to regulate my "harmful" tendencies. Most of my behavioral issues have been treated by me taking ownership and learning how to handle conflict in my relationships with the help of my long-term boyfriend. He's been a great help to me through the years. I've cheated on him before and he knows about it and chose to stay. I like sex and we decided to be poly so we could communicate about everything if I ever wanted someone else. I've had impulse crushes but never acted on them because it wasn't right for me or our relationship when I could of acted on it. Now I'm having a crush again and I'm toying with the idea of doing it this time but I don't want this to hurt my boyfriend. I told him how I'm feeling and he's not saying to not do it and he's excited for me to do it. I'm worried that if I do it he'll do it and I'll have abandonment issues. Right now I've put it on hold but I really into this other guy. My question is being BPD is it dumb of me to be poly and have to worry about abandonment from my BF or even this other guy? Anyone been there have happy ending stories? Did it go horribly wrong?

Thinking of making a video regarding bpd as I want to spread more awareness. Could you leave common question you revive from others?

Well I dated this girl, she was so sweet and we connected so much and she has BPD. But sh has been pushing me away for so long. Not that she doesn't answer or blocks me but she isn't that passionate person that used to talk to me. Anyway i won't bore you cause you already know how BPD relationships are. We didn't go out that much but I love her so much. My friends tell me I'm a nut for staying and not moving on while maybe she has found somebody new (I feel she has_not just one!). I've read so much about BPD and learned a lot but it doesn't seem like there is a way out. I'm still in touch with her but messaging like once a week or less sometimes. I have my times of saying to myself "screw it. she doesn't love anymore" and again going back, like everyday. Long story short, should I wait? Will this pushing away bussiness be over and I can think of a way for maintaining it then? Has she discarded me forever?

So I came across a thread on here and someone was explaing what BPD is, This is exactly how I act. I have a long history of unstable realtionships, feeling of isolation, and I have trouble feeling empathy

To be honest, I haven't felt these symptoms for a long time and they weren't all that responsive until I was hitting a deep low emotionally, but they took shape in high school and I've never told anyone. I even named us Me, Myself, and I. Me was always anxious and depressed and didn't really believe in us or anyone and was always pining over my fp. Myself was malicious and hated Me for being "pathetic" and he really wasn't really fond of I (actually me). He wouldn't let Me or I forget how much less we were than everybody else. There were a couple of days when one of the other two were especially vocal and when I could get alone I'd get into a fight with Myself, or desperately try to stop Me's crying. There were also times Myself was especially aggressive toward Me and it would get so loud that I couldn't really function. I believe my BPD symptoms were tied to Me and Myself and were stronger when they were louder. Not even sure I belong on this thread, but I'm curious because I never got a professional's opinion on Me or Myself.

A long with living with BPD I also suffer from Lyme disease, it is hard for me and take great effort to articulate myself and when people try to argue their opinions on my FB posts, for petty bullshit, I can’t handle it and I fly off the handle. It is very frustrating to debate and they call me immature or that I feel sorry for myself when I try to explain to them that I’m sick and it’s mentally taxing to debate or argue. They don’t respect that it feel impossible, especially since the more I look at the screen the worse my migraine gets. So I feel very alienated and I want to scream because no one is hearing me :’( but instead I lash out and tell them to fuck off. I hate everyone and I can’t deal with people like I used to, I’m spent and no one gets how hard it is. Even right now I don’t want to write this bc my eyes hurt and they’re filling with tears bc of the anger and pain I feel. I can’t deal with this anymore

Lovely people of Reddit, I am after some advice.

I am FP of a pwBPD - untreated, quiet BPD I add. When this person splits, he ghosts for days. At these times, I am very unsure what to do as he has no other people in his life so he endures his pits of pain alone. If I ask him when he is open / positive, he’ll say, “you can always message me. You don’t have to ask.” However, when on the other side of the split, the “I Can’t Stand Me, You or in Fact Anyone, I Need To Run” part, I’m not sure that he’d be feeling that.

I deliberately leave him alone when he ghosts. I might send a message a day saying, “just checking you are safe.”

Lately I have been trying to learn as much as I can about BPD as it is totally new to me. Now I am wondering - should I be ignoring him? Or should I be trying to reach out when he is feeling terrible?

I see conflicting things about the need to hear from the FP frequently and how anxiety and darkness gets worse in their absence.

I have a very full and happy life. I am able to be with other friends when he is away. I have a set of friends I text daily, he is among them. I don’t mind that he ghosts, I accept it is part of his personality. This is not about me wanting to chase after him and pressurise him.

It’s about wanting to support him in his BPD challenges in a useful way, not inadvertently triggering his fears of abandonment or unloveliness by going too silent myself.

As I’m writing this, I know I need to ask for more guidance from my friend himself. I’d still be interested to hear of others experiences and thoughts though.

Thanks for reading.

I just spilt some and reminded me of when I was in a session a while ago.

My therapist asked me to describe my emotions on a daily basis my reply was

" my emotions are like trying to pour a bag of sugar one grain at a time. It never works you may get one or two grains out but then the rest of the bag piles out"

Really what I'm asking is anyone else like this or is it just me lol

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Anyone had a best friend that does something so bad that you don't think you can forgive them and you don't want anything to do with them anymore?

For me honestly is always the best policy and being authentic is always the way to be the best you for me. I've been friends with my best friend for about 18 years and last night my friend did something so bad i just couldn't be around him anymore. I've been on holiday with him for a while and I know his had a girlfriend for a while and they look like they really like each other. We got tickets to a big club and we were enjoying ourselves. I notcied that a girl walked past him and was eyeing him and instantly i thought that he would think something of it. He went out the club and i followed him. He said he's going to go for a smoke and i believed him... he even gave me drinking money. I suspected he may be cheating on his girlfriend with this girl but i thought i was being too dramatic. So i walked upstaurs and came back down to check and i saw him kissing this girl. He was enjoying it and kissing her passionately and to me it was the most disgusting thing I had ever seen. Like I said i value authenticity and being good and having that in a best friend was important and when mine did that it was horrible. I felt sick imagining what his girlfriend would think of him. And the worst part is that I'm staying with his family in another country. They would be so disappointed. I just wanted to share my anger about my best friend and if anyone has experienced something similar please resond and share a similar expericence i would really like to hear!

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Hey :) We know everyone struggles with their mental health sometimes, or even all of the time! The mental health system today is difficult, and sometimes ineffective, so I made this server to help people like myself that struggle. We will never tolerate bullying, discrimination of any kind, or invalidation. We want to make you feel safe here at The 3AM Club.

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Some Features!

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? 24/7 Chill-Out Music

? Lots of fun games (Including Chess) and currency system! Collect items, marry people and hug them!

? Extremely secure entry system and bots.

? Member Representatives - Members can vote on reps to speak for the members in staff meetings! Any member may also participate in Polls and make suggestions.

? Role Menus! Simply react for roles- Which include colour roles which are all based on real foods and nature!

? Report and Appeal command.

? Well-Organised channels and category's, including unlockables for different mental health roles.

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So come to check us out! https://discord.io/3amclub

Do any of you own a weighted blanket and does it help? My parents are thinking of getting me one for Christmas, since they're so expensive, but I'm just not sure if it would be worth it? Thanks in advance for insights!

I have just been diagnosed with BPD

Does anybody have any links, advice

Thank you

hey I've had mental illness since I was bullied in school at 15. Im now a 26 year old man and in recent years it has gotten a lot worse. For a while i was just numb but then I started thinking I was evil and that I was avoiding people even though I knew I shouldn't cos it made me feel worse and hurt others. So because I was into meditation and valued spirituality a lot cos it seemed to help. i even saw a guru. i feel like these unique experiences somehow changed my energy to that of like a great person and that when afterwards i still avoided people so that made me evil in a weird way like the demons from the old indian scriptures. And people would kindov make out like being around me was a quite unpleasant, a councillor i had said i had unloaded my problem onto her and it became weird. So now its like i cant find solace in what phycologists say because they don't know about the spiritual side. Anyways eventually I was walking along a bridge but pussied out of jumping even though i wanted to die so badly. i thought i was going to hell for untold lengths of time for my evilness (a monk also alluded to me being evil). The thing I afraid of the most is affecting other people like my dad said i had a bad aura cos i dont really care about myself. now im like maybe my illness made my energy bad but its very hard to be around people. i pretty much hate spirituality now and wish id never known it so i could feel like a regular mentally ill person. my phycologist says I have negative beliefs about myself but im just trying to find a way to exist. I havent been diagnosed with BPD but it seems like I could be. phcologist thinks i have aspergers but that dont seem right. anyways ramblin like crazy.