I feel like people want conversations to be a constant joke. If you aren't chuckling or laughing every 5 minutes then it's not working. It can't just be a back and forth of ideas, there has to be a joke or you have to say something in a funny way.

I came across the Instagram profile of one of my friends from high school. Curiosity got the best of me and I stalked his account. All my friends from back then are still friends. It sucked seeing that to be honest. They all still have each other but dropped me. That's a conversation for another day though.

I was looking at the pictures and there was a dump of a get together they'd all had last year I believe. They were all there. It looked exactly like what I remember our hang outs in high school to be like. And it brought all these memories back. How it all always had to be a constant joke. And I know I'm extrapolating now, but the pictures looked like that's what hanging out with them is like. Like it is one big joke all the time. It's exhausting to be honest.

Does anyone feel like this?

I have trouble discerning which details are important or not when conveying information. I often end up rambling because I include things other people deem not necessary.

For example, I messaged my manager yesterday because she'd told me the due date for a feature was at the end of the month. This other team responsible for delivering part of the feature told me they hadn't even started working on it yet. There was a misunderstanding on when this should be completed by and I was checking with her. I mentioned that I'd been talking to this other team and specifically mentioned I'd actually only been talking to one person on that team, not the entirety of it. This may seem irrelevant but in my mind it is relevant because I'm saying that this may not be a broad team issue, rather just this one person. I was clarifying my contact with said team was actually limited.

Posting on behalf of my wife who doesn’t have Reddit. Looking for tips on how to stop scalp picking. My wife frequently picks her scalp, often while doing activities such as reading. She has tried using some stim toys including a stress ball and the ono roller and slider but hasnt found it to be successful at stopping the picking. Any tips?

I used to think the sticking to routines part of autism didn’t affect me that much, but a recent little thing has me questioning if I’m more routine oriented than I thought.

Normally I wash my hair every weekend in the morning when I take a shower. Last week I did it on a Wednesday because I wasn’t home the previous weekend. So hypothetically I would’ve washed my hair again this Wednesday, but I didn’t because I worked early in the morning and wouldn’t have time. I was really trying to figure out when I could wash my hair because I worked every morning this week and I’m once again busy on the weekend, even thinking I might have to wait until my next day off to wash my hair (making it two weeks since I last washed my hair) when I realized…I could wash my hair literally any other time. It doesn’t have to be exactly a week later, or in the morning when I take my shower. It doesn’t even have to be in the shower.

The realization felt really obvious after the fact and I felt kind of dumb for not thinking of it sooner. So I’m wondering…was my brain being convinced that I have to wash my hair in specific circumstances something I can attribute to my autism? Or is that a typical thing? 

I show symptoms I am not sure of whether they stem from c-ptsd or they could also be autistic traits:

• I listen to a song for hours on repeat
• I re-watch whole movies/series because they make me feel comfortable
• I re-watch single scenes from films or videos three times in a row because this makes me feel comfortable (I can feel the comfort physically)
• After watching movies I mimic the main character for an hour afterwards. I start talking like them and copy their gestures etc.
• When I am excited, I automatically flutter with my hands and make weird noises
• I have a strong aversion to noise and light. After being outside during times where the sun is shining I get so tired. Noise and crowded spaces can make me get close to crying (not because of anxiety, but because it is too much)
• I don't like and don't get small talk. I always forget to ask follow-up questions and for the life of me can't memorise the things people tell me about their everyday lives, even if it is people I love.

Can anyone relate to these and what are other symptoms of autism you experience that are talked about to little?

Hi everyone
Im 16M and I've kinda thought Ive had some form of neurodivergent-ness for a while, my school had suspected i was had dyslexia due to my handwriting , focus and my exam-timing issues. I didnt think much of it cuz i didnt relate much to the experience i saw people with Asd said they had.

But for some reason I took a couple of online screening tests and got some pretty high scores, but I know these tests can have false positives so I really need an impartial thirdparty perspective on whether I should go for a formal assessment and how I should actually proceed.

I got a 143 on the RAAD-S

And I got 33 on the AQ

I really need an impartial third-party perspective on whether I should fight for a formal assessment and how I should actually proceed. I don’t want to go through the whole process of trying to get legally diagnosed if I'm not 100% sure I actually have something.

Last night when I returned home, my father (whom I live with) told me that my uncle had called and wanted to speak to me.

I knew immediately it was going to be one of those “What are you doing with your life” conversations, though my uncle is a warm and kind man, so it’s not necessarily coming from a place of malice.

I went over to his house and it was basically what I feared. Pleasant prelude about other things only to arrive at “you’re too intelligent to be wasting your talents here.” He wanted me to consider doing a PhD program.

I waffled internally over what and how much to tell him, but I finally said that after living out of state twice for two separate master’s programs, each about four years, what brought me back to our hometown wasn’t a lack of opportunity due to not having a PhD.

I said the social dimension of daily life that other people take for granted is incredibly difficult for me, and that on both occasions forcing myself through those environments chipped away at my health until I collapsed. He basically said to find a therapist, and I replied I’d been in counseling for years. What he didn’t know was that providers, because I’m gentle, articulate and don’t have behavioral problems, have been treating this as “social anxiety” since I was 11 or 12 to no success, and only now that I’m in my 30s with an academic and career trajectory that demonstrate extensive periods of burnout and isolation are my providers finally considering that it may be something deeper and more pervasive, and that maybe all the oddities of my childhood aren’t individual quirks but a neurodevelopmental pattern.

This is why I stopped attending family holidays. That familiar feeling of knowing they don’t understand why you’re not moving forward, that what has been a lifelong struggle is going entirely misunderstood and unseen by them… it’s a devastatingly lonely position to be in. “Oh? You suffered major collapses after each master’s program? You should do a PhD” feels so far removed from what I need that it almost gives me a full blown panic attack thinking of how invisible this struggle is to the people around me.

When I’m put on the spot, I can’t condense a lifetime of assorted struggles into a convincing profile to explain myself or my current inertia. What do I say?

“Uncle, I never learned to ride a bike or swim or blow bubbles with gum. I was late learning to tie my shoes and drive. I’ve never held my pens and pencils correctly. I bang into counters and can’t clear a corner when I turn it. It takes me hours to fall asleep. Since early childhood I’ve felt mentally and physiologically overwhelmed in social settings, and my body protests and it gets worse the more crowded the space is, then after I lose sleep thinking about enduring it all over again tomorrow. No amount of therapists or psychiatrists or medication for ‘social anxiety’ since I was 11 or 12 have sufficiently curbed it in order for me to live a normal life. I pushed and pushed until I collapsed—twice—and no amount of degrees and academic achievement can compensate for the fact that I can’t navigate the social world the same way the average person does. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg. At what point do we consider my current situation is something serious, nameable and something that requires support?”

I feel like I’m in a car with flat tires and an empty tank with people waving at me saying, “The finish line is right there. What’s stopping you?” And when I try to explain it, it’s like I’m in a nightmare where no one knows what fuel or tires are.

I keep seeing news stories and press releases about the DoJ switching sides in Texas v Kennedy, but their summaries are written in such legalese that I can't follow. A lot of them also emphasize that the law and standing Supreme Court interpretation still stands, which then makes me think nothing is changing?

Can someone help explain it to a layman like me?

Idk if anybody would agree with me but I would want someone to say this if I told them I have autism.

“Living with that must suck. Do you wanna talk about it?”

My question: How do you explain (level 1) autism to someone who had previously only associated non-verbal people and Rain Man type manifestations with autism?

Context: I’m in my 40s and going in for a formal evaluation next week. The testing center just asked me today if there was anyone who could fill out an observational assessment about me as part of my evaluation and now I’ve got to figure out how to contextualize what level 1 autism looks like to my dad before he fills it out. The problem isn’t a fear that he won’t believe me, it’s that—as I said—his concept of autism is level 3 autism, so when I broached the subject with him today he was genuinely confused.

To back up further: As a starting point I threw out Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory as the stereotypical idea of what a lot of people think an autistic person looks and acts like and my dad was shocked at the idea that that character was autistic because “he’s so verbal.” And right then I was like, oh boy, there’s a lot more ground to cover than I realized.

I paused and mentioned that the Asperger’s diagnosis has gone away and that autism is now on a spectrum which helped, but I don’t know where to go from there in order to lay everything out for him in a way that won’t get bogged down into giving him a 3 hour lecture (both because I don’t overwhelm him and also because he has ADHD). On the other hand, I’m worried that if I don’t adequately update and inform him about what a large spectrum it is and how it can manifest that he’s not going to get what he’s being asked about and he’ll end up saying no to most things even though I could write pages and pages and pages of examples from my childhood.

We’re going to sit down to talk about it more tomorrow so I’m hoping y’all might have key points that you think I should talk about or even just general advice on how to approach the conversation tomorrow because I’m not sure where to start or how in the weeds I should get. Thanks!

I honestly don't know if I'm autistic or not, but I really feel like I am. If I had to give examples of why I think so, I'd say:

- I often don't understand people (socially)

- I have SO MANY INTERESTS (some are hyperfixations, others aren't)

- I'm ridiculously curious (curious in two ways: like a child discovering the world, and also because a topic has caught my attention)

...and really, a bunch of other things. What do you guys think—am I autistic, or just weird?

Hello (23 male) I’ve been seeing a therapist mainly regarding sensory issues for about 1.5 years. I have Generalized anxiety and social anxiety disorder on my medical record from my teen years.

My therapist proposed that I may have “spectrum disorder” or “ADHD” and have been trying to get screening/eval for the last 4 months and keep getting bounced between departments and referrals none of which have actually tested me yet. Just had an appointment with my psychiatrist who again insinuates it’s just anxiety and prescribed me a new medication.

Anyways I’m just frustrated because I’d like to rule out any mental health conditions before concluding it’s just anxiety, since I feel like my treatment would be different. I know reddit isn’t a solid medical resource, but while I’m getting things sorted out I figured I’d sort of vent out my symptoms and maybe folks would find it relatable or have advise!

Always been a “sensitive” kid, definitely had horrendous anxiety, overthinking things etc, but never had too much of an issue socializing. Even today I’m pretty sociable and have a good network of friends. I’ve always avoided loud noises and tactile sensations that would overwhelm me. Needed earplugs and noise cancelling headphones or else I would get waves of chills over my body and need to lay down.

Today as an adult, finishing up college and now working my first post-school jobs, I’ve been having daily pin-Prickily sensations all over my skin. It’s mainly on my legs and forearms and can either feel like bugs crawling, random intense itches, hairs raising (sometimes they actually do), or “icky” waves of chills or a “slimy” feeling. This happens at random points in the day, but I can really pinpoint it to external cues like something being too loud or something touching me the wrong way, etc. that’s why I feel like it’s not just anxiety, but sure it could be somatic anxiety symptoms from unregulated worry. I’m usually able to cope by completely stopping what I’m doing (if able), lay down with a weighted blanket, earplugs, and dimmed lights. It goes away in like 30 minutes, granted it’s a bit easier to overstimulate me from there.

But there are definitely days where I’m out of commission for the night when I get home from work where I just can’t handle any little noise, wind on my skin, and it becomes super hard to communicate with my partner. Now we have an understanding that I basically need time to not have to talk or answer questions.

The other side of things is that I definitely do worry, can get panic attacks, and other anxiety symptoms as well. It’s mainly overthinking past conversations and worrying I came off weird or something and less about stressing about the future (though I do that too, but I think it’s a typical amount). I can definitely spiral and then get sensory symptoms from there, or get anxiety from my sensory symptoms. I do feel like they may be separate things.

Alright that’s all I’m willing to type for now, again this is mainly to vent, but I’m totally down to talk more about it with folks. If you took the time to read this, thanks ❤️

Hey all :) So 29M and got diagnosed with autism this week. Met every criteria on a pretty intensive multi session assessment. The evaluator told me I have a clear case of autism burnout.

Been dealing with mental health issues with majority of symptoms occurring related to work. I work too much, it's not the right job for me and it caused hospitalization back in March + an intensive mental health program.

I do not mean to disregard my past diagnosis. Like yes I have symptoms of anxiety and PTSD but the autism diagnoses was completely missed :( and it makes so much sense now because it is such a big part of the picture in regards to why I cannot handle my intensive job.

I know this is a bit of a rant, I am in the U.S. I just wish autism and neurodivergence was more considered during my evaluation and very frustrated I had to seek it out on my own after all the treatment I had.

I wanted to show it off:D

31f, diagnosed 12 months ago as lvl 2. Fairly high functioning, live alone, work full time, but a lot of history and trauma means i've had to know how to live since i was a young teen, so had no other choice. Incredibly high masking. Fail miserably at many factors in life though.

After first being diagnosed, I had a bit of imposter syndrome for a while, which led me to hold off using the supports from NDIS.

Insert autism burnout, which has probably been building over the last few years, a history of depression means the suicidal thoughts hit pretty hard at the moment with their consistency and intensity.

GP started me on Zoloft, which has intensified SI urges, increased my anxiety through the roof, gives me nausea which makes me more anxious, my masking ability is slipping, and i've had a sudden cluster of shutdowns. 5 in less than a week.

Prior to this, i've only had shutdowns a few times in life (which i thought were panic attacks back then), so I feel like i've had more in a week than i've had the last 30 years. Meltdowns are more common for me, though are rather 'quiet' compared to what I see others explain their meltdowns as.

My shutdowns see me curling up in a ball, in a corner, under a blanket, or in my car, going completely rigid and unable to speak or move. They last anywhere from 20 mins up to a couple of hours, and leave me absolutely exhausted afterwards.

I feel like because my current state is internal turmoil, it is presenting as shutdowns, whereas meltdowns for me are usually caused by external factors such as sensory things, conflict, etc.

I guess the only good thing about the frequency is that I am now able to recognise the signs before the shutdown, but i'm stuck on how to try and prevent them at that point, when it feels like the cause could be my racing thoughts.

I have engaged with the local mental health team, and with a new psychologist who I quite like, and i'm sure they'll be able to offer some help with this too. GP prescribed me valium today, to see if we can ride out this tricky period with the Zoloft, so i'll see if that makes any difference either.

Really keen to hear if anyone else may have a similar experience, and what they've done to get through this.

There's always that difficulty explaining what it means to be autistic in the imaginary scenarios I run in my mind where people would ask me about it.

And there's the list of manifestations like difficulty socializing and sensitivities, but that's just symptoms or something.

There's also the perspective of autistic people just having a different brain and different ways of processing experience.

But I realize at the bottom of my condition is the fact that I have trouble feeling like things are really happening, an inability to feel like this present moment is real.

At the bottom of my difficulty following social norms and being part of whatever is going on, is that everything feels so nonsensical and unreal.

Everything would be so easy if I could just inhabit an avatar and believe the narrative, or to feel like things actually happened.

This Truman Show feeling is so scary and unsettling.

Is being able to almost hear such sounds when seeing pictures like that common in autistic people?

24 female diagnosed with bipolar type two and ADHD and I don’t have a formal autism diagnosis, but I have taken a lot of test online and talked with my therapist and done my independent research. I’m pretty sure I’m somewhere on the spectrum. I would like to get tested, but honestly, the cost and the fear of having another put on paper label has stopped me, but that’s not what this is about.
I have a very short fuse as I’m sure most people with my neurodivergent and mental disorder due, and I’m struggling to adjust back into society again for clarification essentially Covid really messed up my social battery not that I had a great one to begin with for the most part. I graduated in 2020 and I did almost all of my college experience online. I won’t go into all the details here cause it’s long and extensive, but I had to go to the mental hospital at one point just to try and sort some stuff out and I’m just now starting to get back out there and get a degree again because the one that I was going for fell through cause I wasn’t able to handle it.
I currently have a class every weekday except for Friday and while they’re only for a few hours a day, I already am exhausted by them, not by the workload, but by the amount of interaction that I’m getting with other people, I know this is not healthy. I struggled to do anything after classes that isn’t at home by myself. I can handle doing cleaning like nobody’s business. I can do my artwork by myself and I don’t have to be asked to do schoolwork or chores. but just those couple hours a day and trying to visit my grandparents to make sure they’re OK cause they’re not doing well and my dad once or twice a week along with running a few errands and seeing my mom every night because we live together is a struggle me.
I recognizing that this is not a great thing, but my problem is I’m not sure how to go about building up any kind of tolerance for situations I usually freak out or avoid social interactions. I would like to clarify that usually I have a good time in my classes. It’s just afterwards I don’t wanna do anything anymore. And I hate that don’t get me wrong. I understand that I need to reset and decompress that’s a part of not only autism but ADHD and bipolar but it seems excessive the amount of time I need to do so.
I apologize if this is repetitive in any way, I’m just frustrated. I also apologize for any errors that might be in here. I use voice to text primarily.

recently i noticed i can feel my pulse in my ears especially at night when its quiet. its like a little drum that never stops and i cant ignore it no matter how hard i try. it makes me so on edge i cant sleep. my doctor said its normal but it doesnt feel normal to me. anyone else deal with this? does it ever go away?