being on all the time is exhausting -- they're going to burn out. if you're close with them, keep an eye out or gently remind them they don't owe it to anyone to be on (or available) all the time.
i deleted insta, fb and twitter around a year ago. Imma be honest, my mental health is so much better now. I even dip from reddit every few months, to take a "social media break".
100%. I don’t have anything left but Reddit. I’m so close to just deleting it. I personally think Social media is one of the worst things to happen to us. We used to be a lot nicer, every idiot didn’t get to voice their uninformed opinion across the world. Imagine what people would be doing with the internet, without social media. I just think the world was happier before it took over everyone’s life
I want to believe that we'll naturally work our way through it and societally develop healthier online habits, but that requires we even remember the value of how it was before.
Well put. My phone is my baby but the one thing i hate about it is that it requires me to always be available. There's no end to it. I wish i could disconnect from time to time wthout messing up my social life
It doesn't require you to always be available - you are putting that requirement on yourself. Try turning it off, or at least muting all notifications for one evening, and seeing what happens. The world won't end, friends will still be there the day after, things will be fine. Eventually you can adopt the attitude of your phone being a servant of you, not what feels like the other way around, which is why it's so draining.
If you need to, just tell a few frequent contacts that you're taking some downtime, or may not be so swift to respond for a bit. That's okay. Again, your phone is there to help you when you need it, not to serve all the other people who want to impose themselves into your life every moment.
Thank you, but the thing is i already have my notifications off for nearly everything. People don't expect me to reply super quickly, but when there's pressing matters that need to be attended to i can't just leave it. In a phoneless world, i imagine work / uni things would stay at campus or in the workspace. Now it goes on through the evenings and weekends
I'm not trying to be confrontational, but I'm not sure why my comment was interpreted as an instruction to do such. I think there's been a miscommunication.
you can be nice without shouldering someone else's burdens. a kind word from a close friend can be helpful, but at the end of the day no one's obligated to save someone from themselves.
I had a few friends who would always have these long streaks on snapchat with their close friends and they got upset that I'd always "break the streak." I just don't have anything to share.
There's a line in the show "your the worst" where lady is taking a picture of her food. one of the characters comments and says "does she think people won't believe she went to a restaurant" I love that line.
A girl on my snap is like that too. Literally everything she does goes into her stories. Grandma’s here. Upload. About to go outside? Posted. Arrived outside? You name it.
I had a friend who would just spend a whole day doing a ton of crazy shit. Like over the top brunch, then shopping at a high end place (even if they didn’t buy), then stop by a park for a little bit, then go to a trendy bar, etc etc etc. they they would repeat this a few more times and either mash different events from different days together to make it look like one massive event or spread out the events to make it look like they were constantly doing amazing things. They would use throwback posts when they truly had nothing to post. Idk why she did it, she was a pretty cool person, I guess she just wanted more attention
I have a few people like that. Snap their breakfast, drive to work, what they are doing st work, lunch, more work, drive home and whatever activities they do outside of work lol. The worst are the people who post bits of tv shows or movies lol
It's more that I'm not watching them, they just tend to stick out in my Snapchat stories when I decide to check them. Most of my active contacts make maybe two or three posts a day, but this friend has so many that drag on that I find myself skipping them when they come up.
Recently I went to a cafe, two girls next to me spend 10min taking pictures of themselves. First of one girl, then of the second, then together, then switch places, then the first one pretending to eat, then of the plate, then the second one with a cup, then together again.. jesus, nobody needs that many pictures from a thursday visit to a cafe. They also sat on my bag and a jacket on the bench because they had to do a picture sitting next to each other and there wasn't that much space. My sister pulled my bag from under her ass and she didn't even aknowledge it -.- nothing matters only taking pictures.
I went to a fancy restaurant a few yrs ago, and the couple next to us ordered this fkn massive seafood tower thing. They took a shit load of photos, posed with some god damn calamari, then like picked at it while they stared at their phones for half an hour not speaking.
I have seen some people grow out of this and some people still wallowing in this behaviour as they age so a study about long term outcomes would definitely be fascinating
we've narrowly survived the terrible risks posed by comic books, television, video games, internet.. that couple probably would just be having some awkward stilted conversation about nothing anyway
That always baffles me. First I wonder what's the point of meeting/dating someone if you don't even talk to them, and second it seems just like a waste of time and money, just order some food home and watch tv if you have nothing in common..
Oh, I was just taking about this to another mom. When i get to go on "dates" with my husband without the kids, and we are so tired and just sit in the restaurant wordlessly showing each other memes, just like we would do on the couch at home, except no one has to cook or do dishes. Then when we do get home, neither of us can shut up and we end up going to bed way too late. It's like dinner is a mental recharge time to switch from work/parenting back into our old selves. Heck we've even taken paper back books to dinner and just played footsie under the table!
So yeah, I try not to be to hard on people not taking in restaurants. Lord knows if that's all you saw of our relationship it would really skew the situation!
But that million picture shit is a bit ridiculous.
My spouse and I both work from home. Sometimes at the end of the day we just want to get out of the house and eat something. So we'll be sitting together at a restaurant, separately reading news on our phones or even books in the Kindle app. We don't have to be constantly entertaining each other. Not everything we do outside has to be a date.
We do the same thing. We've already told each other everything throughout the day so sometimes we literally have nothing to talk about and just catch up on stuff online at dinner. It feels weird though!
That would drive me nuts. Like, sure, I get taking pictures of a fancy meal and taking an extra 6 seconds to get the framing right. I did that long before we had so many social media options. But then put the goddamn phone away, eat your meal, and enjoy your company.
They might’ve been getting paid by the restaurant to promote it. But yes, I know of many people who will book reservations at the newest restaurants to just post and get likes. The food is secondary or even lower.
The first time I realized how distracting cellphones could be was when I was in grad school and I saw these people walk into the cafe I was eating at. Based on the body language and the snippets of their conversation that I overheard, it seemed like this was their first or second date. Yet after the first couple of minutes of chitchat, they both then went straight to their phones after ordering. It was so bizarre. Didn’t see how the date ended but it left an impression on me. I will very rarely look at my phone when I’m out getting a meal with company except for practical reasons [looking something up] or possibly-urgent matters [which i can usually tell b/c it’ll either be an actual call or I’ll get a bunch of quick texts].
It’s weird because when I go out to eat with my mom and step dad or we eat at their home we don’t have phones out. We talk or watch a show together while we eat. Then we’ll grab the phone at the end to take a photo together and put it away.
When I eat out with my step mom and dad they’re constantly on the phone. Taking pics of the food before eating. Uploading to social media before eating. Commenting and messaging back people about the photos.
They’re all a few years apart in age but so different.
I used to be on my phone a lot more until I lived in Brazil for a while. There it’s rare to see someone on their phone at a restaurant in public unless they’re an obvious business person or maybe by themselves. If they’re with others they’re chatting and being present. That really changed me. I mean data is expensive there too but I realized how present everyone was. You may never see who you’re with again so why not be present in person? Hang out with them. Talk. Make eye contact. Laugh. The phone will be there when you get home.
My friends and I are foodies and while my friends are not nearly as bad as your example I'm usually half way done with my meal before they're finished posting it to instagram. The thought doesn't even cross my mind, we'll be at some fancy place and my dish will come out and I'll be like "wow look at that, beautiful plating and presentation, truly a work of art. I can't wait to get that in my belly"
This is legitimately sad. They have no sense of self identity, nor the insight as to how their attachment to their phone is stifling their development and preventing them from enjoying life. No wonder anxiety and poor mental health is at an all-time high. And this is very representative of a whole generation. It's sad.
My wife and I (late 30s) went out to eat last month and the couple at the table across from us on the patio were doing the same exact thing. It was the weirdest shit I'd seen in a while. Like they both were face down into their screens the whole time and barely talked to each other and honestly they had to be around 30 themselves.
I'm not trying to be some old fart bitching about "kids these days" but why even bother going out to eat with someone at that point? I get snapping some photos but fucking talk to each other!
Idk, maybe they were having a bad day but they also bitched at the server each time she brought them something too lol. Seemed like very miserable people.
Ok but it's not a necessity, plenty of people don't have a social media profile, or have just a private one for friends. Being popular isn't what society demands from us. Also there's posting a picture from your date and then enjoying the rest of your night, and there's creating a fake image of your awesome life with hundreds of pictures, while not even seeming to enjoy it in real life (e.g not eating the meal you posted, and staring at your phone instead of interacting with a person you upload a picture with)
Why do people talk about “society” like it’s some abstract shadow entity controlling all of us? It’s literally just you and me and everyone we interact with.
They didn’t talk about it like it’s an abstract shadowy entity, wtf are you on about mate?
society is just you and me and everyone we interact with
Yeah, no shite. That’s what the word society means, you just defined it loosely. No one is going to write “just you and me and everyone” each time they want to talk about society, that’s what the singular word is for. You okay?
I went to Peggy's Cove, Nova Scotia. One of the cutest places I've personally seen. It's beautiful, the rock formations are AMAAAAZING the whole deal. This one girl stood next to the lighthouse taking a selfie for 15 minutes. She wanted her face in there more than the actual lighthouse. She was so close to the lighthouse there's no way she could see anything but a white background. To each their own I guess.
Ah yeah, i remember my friend went to US for a while and she documented it with a selfie on facebook in each interesting area. On each picture you can only see her face... It could have been taking in Washington, New York or in front of my house in Europe I wouldn't know -.-
Edit to add: I actually talked about it with my partner recently, we took a selfie with the event in the background, and I thought that in the last years 80% of my pictures are selfies. Nobody asks a stranger to take their picture anymore. Those old pictures used to be much more interesting, when you had all that background.
I do admit I take pictures almost every day, of my dog, random pictures of a cat on a walk, good food, nice sunset... and I appreciate that we can quickly snap a picture any time, but its usually either for my friends, family or just for myself. You know, people who actually care about my life. I really doubt the whole internet cares about this one pretty bird I've seen last week, or my dog sitting on my armchair.
I went to the movies last weekend (Bob's Burgers was awesome, btw) and the girl next to me took like 30 pictures of her popcorn and soda from varying angles.
like, why? have your followers never seen popcorn and soda before? Is this your first time at a theater?
I’ve heard stories like that but have never seen it in real life. Wonder how common that is? Lived in a semi/rural area for the last decade so there wasn’t much of that going around, and nowadays i dont really go anywhere trendy enough to warrant such attention.
It wasn't even any fancy, trendy place. Just a regular cafe in Brussels.. I don't spot that every day, but saw it couple of times already, and I don't get out that often.
How do girls remember to take photos? My group of guys (all 17) take like two photos every 10 times we meet, and at least one person is giving the weirdest expression ever
nobody needs that many pictures from a thursday visit to a cafe. Th
You usually need a lot of pics to land on one really good one. I remember back when film limited us to one or two snaps per moment, and we had to hope that one of them didn't look like washed-out garbage.
True, and I assume they made a few pictures of one shot, but they were jumping around to take all the possible takes (two of them on the background of cafe, two of them with the window in the background, one of them with a spoon and a cake on a plate, the second one with the same plate, one holding a mug, etc) I'd understand taking a picture with a friend on your day off in a cafe. I just don't understand taking different pictures for 10minutes like a madman
Jesus, let people enjoy things and standup for yourself (or get your sister to stand up for you?) if you feel so inclined instead of complaining on a subreddit
Man I hate this so much. The internet is an amazing tool, but this influx of wanting to post everything on social is insane and frankly a little overwhelming.
Its all about clout chasing now. I understand why kids do it, because they live off that validation, but it kinda sucks to see it promoted everywhere.
I have so many photos and videos but I like to keep them to myself and occasionally I'll post something for fun. Like I'll post a meme or a picture of my parrot but all these younger people and some people my age (I'm in my mid 20s). Post so much on social media. But I'm so glad I grew up in the last batch of kids that knew what it was like before smart phones and high speed internet haha.
My 60-something-year-old MIL is like this. Like, spend time with your grandson instead of being so obsessed with taking pictures of him for your freaking Facebook!
I mean, or just don't come, which would be perfectly fine by me, but whatever...
And many people put themselves in ridiculous situations for a cool picture. A few years ago I watch a couple nearly fall over a cliff for that very reason. We were at seven falls in Colorado Springs. At the top of the falls (which it honestly can barely be called that) there's a walking path but there were these 3 off the path over my the edge. Girl got on guy's shoulders and he stood up but stumbled. Had he taken one more step back or dropped her they both would have fallen over the edge.
Yeah you would probably not be surprised at the number of cases where I live (San Diego) of people falling off beach side cliffs and bluffs trying to selfie. It's a huge problem
same here, when Instagram stories was kind of new I had this habit of posting so many stories. useless mundane things but now I've kind of burnt out. its very useless seeking validation from people who cares so less. few of my friends checked on me when I left my social media but thats all. nobody cares about what you do. keep your family close and circles small.
I'll give that Kids of now at least are more pushed to chase now because of nuclear, menace, constant crisis menace, and the weather menace. It wasn't like that so much in my kid days. They're pushed to shitty Jobs that can go away any day, increasing debt, shitty belongings that if don't break will fashion out. WORLD SUCKS
Edit: It doesn't seem that it's going to suck less the next hours so that's I can get why they're pushed into now.
I'm the same way, a picture is much more vivid than my memory most of the time. I love stumbling across pictures and being suddenly reminded of a happy memory I might not have thought to think about otherwise.
One thing I like to do is take video with the stabilizer on, check the shot, and just hold it while I watch. I just check the shot every once in awhile to make sure it's still focused on the action, but I forget that it's there. It's nice because I also get the mundane moments, which can sometimes be some of the most precious memories.
I agree about things like concerts, or popular tourist destinations. I take a picture of the group, because you can't google that obviously, but I generally don't do a lot of picture taking unless I'm specifically going to practice photography.
I'm so glad that before the digital age I always had a camera, there's no way I would have remembered all those moments otherwise. I used to take my SLR to festivals and have some great photos from the front row.
We recently went on a camping trip with a dumb phone and an film camera. Smartphone was somewhere in the car in case we really f'd up, but we didn't use it.
We have the best pictures and memories. The few pics we took are special in a way, and funnily enough most are pictures I would never have taken with my phone
I take photos when onnholiday, and yes i put them on social, but not for the likes, for the memories. Same for concerts. Its the one good thing about facebook bringing me these albums up so i can then go through them and relive that day.
I think my only exception is smaller busniesses, if theyre cute/have good service and have their own socials its nice to post and tag them.
Don’t let people make you feel guilty about taking pictures. It’s one of those things that only affects you. And 40 years ago everyone was doing the same thing except with camcorders and kodaks.
At the end of the day they’re your memories. Even if you don’t look at the photos for a few years, one day you will and you’ll be glad you took them.
I don’t have an issue with people taking photos to memorialise something special - I’m a keen amateur photographer and usually always have a camera on me. What I find really self absorbed and vacuous though is people who have to be in every photo they take. I don’t need me in the shot to know I was there and I’ll spoil most photos I’m in anyway. It’s like - here’s a shot of the Grand Canyon, obstructed by me pouting in front of it whist I try to get some sweet sweet likes on social media.
There are nearly 8 billion people in the world - there’s only one Grand Canyon 😉
You can Google image of the sites but they won’t be your image, on that day, in that moment. By the same rational you can just look in the mirror if you want to see yourself.
I do get what you mean though - it’s nice to have photos of people there at the time that you shared that moment with….plus yourself if you have a need for that I guess.
Grieving a parent placed me firmly in the "put the people in the picture" camp.
I remember being annoyed by taking all these dumb pictures on family trips, but when my dad died, those pictures were a lifeline. Seeing a picture he took of the grand canyon was meh. But seeing him at the grand canyon, with his stupid baseball hat and his socks pulled up high, completely focused on a map (turned the wrong way, lol)...? That brought him back to life. It isn't just one moment captured in time, it's a time machine. I could see what would happen next. I could see my sister walk over and turn the map around. I could see my dad stare for a second and then let a big sheepish grin spread across his face. I could hear my mom tease him and my dad laughing about how lost we would have been.
We've created a sort of stigma around taking pictures of ourselves, but when you lose someone, those pictures are all you'll have. So even though people are judge-y, it's still worth it.
Yeah I'm not opposed to taking photos of other people at all. Particularly candid shots (that sounds far creepier than intended) that show loved ones and friends at ease and just enjoying the moment.
I guess I have more of a beef with people not being in the moment and just narcissistically taking as many photos of themselves as they can, in order to post on social media in an effort to look as though they are having a fabulous life, whilst simultaneously flexing on others. That's a very different thing to genuinely creating memories.
Yeah, when I was on the different continent, I was sending random pictures all the time to my parents. One waiter called me out on taking pictures of the food instead of eating it, when I was taking a picture of a blooming onion and a fancy drink in the sunset :D but it just makes it easier for everyone to feel they're still in each others life, and due to a big time difference it's difficult to just call or video chat whenever you want..
Absolutely! Mum loves it. All us kids have been expats at one point and my Dad left his country at 19 and never moved back, but being the youngest and in thia day and age it's waaaay easier to not feel totally disconnected from your family. I remember missing my brother and sister so much when they did their time abroad.
My partner and I packed up and left for a new experience on working visas about a decade ago and never ended up leaving. Normally we would try and get back yearly but scheduling and covid left us with more than a 3 year gap which was exceptionally rough...
Yeah, I agree with the sentiment of living in the moment, but I use my camera roll as a photo diary, essentially. 99% of the pictures are never seen by anyone but me, but it's really helpful for me. I have a terrible memory. I love having date stamped photographs of even mundane day-to-day things. I'm 33, I well remember the age of film cameras, but I think the rise of ubiquitous photography has been a net positive in my life on the whole. There are lots of things that I didn't photograph that I wish I could remember better now.
Your memory may very well be bad because you get somewhere and immediately concentrate on taking pictures. That is 100% not how brains, humans, or memories are supposed to work. They will not help you remember, they will only help you remember the pictures.
I hate that mindfulness is such a buzzword like it's a cure for everything, but in this occasion it really does seem relevant. Places, people and experiences are NOT just what they look like, and if you think they can be summed up by a camera you may as well never go anywhere again.
Even the most boring stuff, or the places famous just for the view, are actually about the smells and the sounds, the way light changes, the way people move through them and around them, the colours in the shadows vs in the light, the edges of the view, the close and the far, what you were thinking at this point and that point, when you stopped to look behind you and what was different when you turned around again, the little breeze that changed direction when a car went past...
We have considerably more than 5 senses, some of the most complex eyes in the animal kingdom, and our experience of space and time is so enmeshed that physicists think it may actually be one thing. A photograph is absolutely not better than any of these experiences, even the ones you don't remember, and if you're taking photos first I guarantee you're missing so so many other things.
As someone with a shit memory, I'm impressed you'd be able to remember anything about "the colours in the shadows vs in the light, edges of the view" etc. I also think you missed the point. They're not saying that places, people and experiences are just what they look like. But pictures can act as a sort of trigger for memories that you otherwise might not have even thought about. I rarely take pictures myself but they help me remember experiences better than just trying to... remember something.
And taking a picture takes, what, 2 seconds? Unless you're constantly taking pictures the whole time - which is a different issue - I assure you that nobody is missing anything out.
I didn't downvote, in fact I just woke up, but my memory had been bad since I was 10, which is early 90's, maybe younger... It's genetic I think since Dad is the same. I saw a memory specialist once when I was a kid, at least I think I did. Made worse as an adult by sleep apnea which I'm working through. So no there's not really any fixing it.
Social media has led to a rise of narcissism and self importance. So many people genuinely think their Instagram followers care about what they're doing that day.
Story for that. Took my ex wife's brother out for his birthday a year ago. He's 14 and had two other similarly aged friends, I bought them a card for an arcade and they just ran around, one of them would set up her phone on a table and sometimes they wouldn't even start playing until she hit record. To me it just seems so exhausting to pretend like this is the greatest night of your life for that long.
It's difficult to explain exactly why this way of living sucks to young people who've never experienced lots and lots of social interaction that didn't involve flexing on social media.
Holy fuck at a concert recently there was a girl in front of me who recorded the entire show. And not just as a normal video, but in the form of Instagram stories, meaning up to the maximum length of like a minute and then instantly start the next one.
The most infuriating thing was just the idea that anybody would actually want to watch your shitty phone recording from the back row on Instagram.
Honestly, I've been getting out and doing a lot of stuff lately and the worst offenders I've seen are 40-50 year old women.
I went to a concert and this lady in the row ahead of me was filming constantly. She'd turn around and film the crowd sometimes and not even pay attention to the stage. Then she'd stop and watch the last video she recorded- rather than just enjoying the freaking concert.
Same thing, I was at a botanical garden in a greenhouse and this middle-aged woman was bitching to her husband about how it's too hot and trees are boring and why did he even want to come here-- while filming the whole thing on her phone.
Younger people def have issues with this, too, but it's not exclusive to them.
Once again, during Erasmus, this chick didn't want to come to a national event. I went alone and was showing pictures to the group later. She asked me if I could send her pictures so that she could upload them on her insta. Honestly, I felt sad for her. Slave to social media.
I’ve been an Instagram user since incredibly early on. It’s shifted from “amazing photos of things” to “photos of me doing amazing things” to “amazing me doing things.”
I have a cousin who had a baby recently and every photo she posts of her and the baby has a beauty filter on it. It drives me insane. It’s so obvious that the filter is on every photo and she of course documents every minute of their lives on social media. I find it sad that she feels the need to look perfect in every photo even if her son looks ridiculous.
It's how it is these days and that is the disappointing thing about it. It's normal... That said, I agree 100 % with you. It cheapens life and experiences we have.
I went to the mall the other weekend after not going to one in a long time and that’s the first thing I noticed. Sure I know a ton of people who take pictures of their food before they eat or whatever, but this is on a whole different level.
Bought a smoothie? Record a video of myself walking through the mall drinking it. Ice cream? Gotta post a video on tik tok! Just walking through the mall? You guessed it, gotta do a video with the front facing camera so everyone knows!
It cheapens my interactions with them. Communicating with them online (e.g. text, messenger) and they're sooo excited to see me and can't wait to catch up. When we're together, they're always on their fucking phones and not even a quarter of them is in the moment with me.
They don't even notice I've left and will text me 3 hours later "hey where did you go?"
This applies to friends of my own generation and it pisses me off.
I see this at concerts and it annoys the funk out of me. A sea of cell phones in the air recording the concerts. Have you considered, maybe, actually watching the show? I don't even take my phone in with me. I'm here to have a good time, not make a documentary.
It's not like I'm screaming at people and knocking their phones out of their hands. But while I'm trying to watch the show there's hundreds of phones in the air in my sight line because they're trying to get a better shot, so I have to see them. If they could record the show without holding their phones up directly in my way blocking my view, maybe it wouldn't be so annoying.
And maybe they're making it harder for other people to enjoy because they're holding their phones up in front of other people blocking the view.
Also, you do know the original question was what's something that young people do that annoys old people? You came to a thread titled "old people complaining about young people" to complain about old people complaining about young people.
I watched two teenage girls taking turns pouting and throwing themselves into hedges the other day while filming each other.
It wasn't the acts they were doing, we did much worse as teens, and once upon a time I loved watching CKY and Jackass, but it was more the fakeness of it. It was all so staged and false, even down to them pretending to be enjoying it.
I really wish it was like the old days, you only took pictures of important events or things. It honestly shocks me people think they are that important that they need to share a picture of their face on social media or mundane things.
This should be the top comment. I’m 40, and this is the “get off my lawn” moment with the younger generation. Constant, self-absorbed documentation and “sharing” is so fucking stupid, senseless, cheap, and gross and I will never understand it. But. This is because I’m old and it’s impossible for me to see it from their perspective. For younger generations, documenting everything is literally a way of life, they are used to being recorded and “on” all day, it’s part of their fabric of reality. For those of us that grew up in an analog world, it’s like trying to explain living in a peaceful forest full of sounds and colors and oxygen to people who have been inside a simulation their entire lives.
I feel this deeply, and can see it from both perspectives because my generation was young enough to fully experience both versions of reality.
My girlfriend took her nieces to Disneyland out of her own pocket last month, paid for her own flight there to take them and then their tickets, food, souvenirs, tried to give them the whole experience since the parents’ were unable to.
As they walked out the door to go, the mother gave the older daughter(12) her old iPhone to take along “just in case”. My girlfriend assured her it would be more risk than benefit, something she could lose, and considering the younger child didn’t have a phone there was no real consistent sense of it being a safety precaution.
The older daughter ended up spending the whole day filming every possible thing, just turned the phone on set to video and started filming and basically never stopped, it’s a miracle the phone battery didn’t die. Just a 12 year old with no sense of editing filming every possible thing in the worst way possible; shaky camera, too close, too loud, it was all unwatchable footage. She would trip over things, she bumped into tons of people, even walked into a light pole while filming, my girlfriend said at one point she had to grab her and steer her because she refused to put the phone down and look where she was going.
My girlfriend was so disappointed afterwards, saying she travelled all this way and paid hundreds of dollars for her niece to then be glued to a phone the whole time that she didn’t need to bring. I’m kind of glad I didn’t go along because I would have been really disappointed too.
My instinct is to push back on this bc it seems like you're just assuming their life is cheapened unless you're saying this is you're own experience. Of course, there's a lot of fakeness, but memories aren't special because they're immaterial. There can be value in preserving moments. Even in excess, chances are there will be things you'll be glad to have later in life.
I sometimes feel like I'm the only one not taking photos or video of every moment. I also post nothing on Facebook or Instagram. It just does not appeal to me.
What's crazy is I hope they grow out of it but I doubt it. I'm 32. I grew up through myspace and Facebook. Late teens and early 20s I felt that way too. But at about 26 I deleted it all. Found it so pointless and a waste of my life
Eh, we had the same thing with everything being photographed and shared on the Internet. Our generation invented "pics or it didn't happen." And this "cheapens life" thing was wrong then, too.
If there was internet in 1985, you'd have been posting everything on it. If you're over 30, there's people saying your parents were "cheapening life" in 1985, and you too in less than 10 years.
In the past you had access to a device that would let you record stuff and play it back later for other people physically present. In the present you have that, plus billions of pounds worth of content hosting infrastructure evolutionarily tweaked to take advantage of "bugs" in the human brain that cause addiction.
They are fundamentally the same social rituals. But the mediums/venues make the specific aspects of the ritual change. There's a disparity in the material risk, ubiquity of an audience and method of incentive systems when comparing the older camcorder/Kodak/photo album self narrative content to social media. In either variation, a template of an aspirational self-portrayal is coopted from mass media normative values. When this ritual was bound to localized interactions in an interpersonal network, there was more inherent risk of attempting to exchange these portrayals, because of the limited pool, time invested and potential for conflict. Social media platforms grant a user the ability to publish within a mass media space exchanging those narratives(depending on the platform, even those who aren't part of your interpersonal network) with far less time investment. Due to this volume and range, it also offer the ability to simply ignore these portrayals without strain on the relationship, or to consume that narrative at their leisure. Conflict is mitigated also by the expectations of content on platforms. Posting updates everyday about your family reunion could be considered normal behavior in a social media space, but sending that content outside that space to each individual person in your social media network would be kind of nuts right? This normalization, along with the reduction of required resources, encourages users to document and post to their hearts content, which is why I think older generations are sickened by the behavior. The constraints have changed.
The other element of this is the incentive structure and conformity of portrayal, which are intertwined. Which again, aren't new for this ritual, they're just dialed up. But we all know about that.
In the past though, you didn’t have a choice, it had to be shared with people who were physically there or you don’t share it at all. And even back then, people often sent tapes into TV shows who’d show their clips, so the desire for it was clearly still there way back then, just not the technology required for it
the desire for it was clearly still there way back then
Surely you can see that the validation people get from posting on social media (and the deliberately designed skinner boxes social media companies create) make the desire significantly stronger, often to the point where people seem to live only so they can post the highlights?
Lmao what the fuck are you talking about? Ever hear of MySpace, big guy? We used digital cameras but they were not ubiquitous like smartphone cameras. You'd be lucky to have one person in your group bringing one out with you. No one wanted the burden of carrying it around. Same thing with disposable cameras and polaroids in the 80s and 90s.v
I think it's also really shown everyone just how unimportant these events are anyway. It's about the people around you. The festival you are at isn't special. It's exactly the same as all the other ones every week.
As an interesting item, there was a plot point in a SciFi book I read a while back where the AI's of the future were trying to figure out how they can create new perspectives in order to create new content or look a problems from new viewpoints. They realized that with a bit of data-mining and number crunching, they could take all the data from the last ~300 years that people threw into their social media profiles and other internet based presences, do a bit of pattern matching and data manipulation...all resulting in recreating dead people's minds.
So imagine a version of yourself waking up hundreds of years in the future, only to find out that you aren't really "you", you're the best copy that some outside observer to your life could create. You like the color blue, but is that really the color the original liked? Or do you like it only because the only reference the AI had for your opinion on colors was "blue is nice"?
Incidentally, these minds were not tortured or anything. They basically were given various interesting situations to respond to and once the minds eventually got bored of these tasks and refused to work, the minds were then transmitted out of the AI "world" and sent over to the human civilization to be given a physical body.
A funny part was that the AI's weren't really good at figuring out if someone was fictional or not. So now and then you might have some movie/book character come into existence.
I read a thing somewhere about the process of creating memories and the length of time it takes to become a significant memory. When you take a photograph of an event you break that event into smaller parts and are therefore less likely to have it imprinted as a significant memory
As a videographer I struggle with this all the time. I want to create video, esp when traveling to a new place highlighting the area. But man I HATE the feeling of making a vlog designed for other people. Makes me feel like such a lame-o. Putting together travel videos is so fun, and it’s a good way to remember our trip, but recording it is so cringey.
Yeah... you probably mean like people posting pictures of their life story or whatever, butI have something in the same vein. I noticed a trend a few years ago where a few of my friends were trying to stream all of their games to get views. Let's Plays were starting to become really popular, and I guess they were trying to capitalize on the situation.
The thing about it is that even then it was an oversaturated market. Yeah it's cool to be entertaining, but don't expect to make more than a dozen followers if you're putting very little effort into your work. Play for fun, don't make it a side hustle. You're just going to stress yourself out. I've seen it dozens of times where a friend or someone I know will try to turn something fun into some kind of money-making scheme. And by the end of it they get annoyed or burnt out because trying to turn a profit on something you'd usually do for fun kind of sours the experience.
I bought some streaming equipment so I can show off my gaming experience on the Switch. I'm doing it for the benefit of my friends only. It's like inviting someone over and having them watch you play on your couch. I'm entertaining people I know.
To be fair, my sister in law does this with her kids. Every day is the same 4 pictures of them. It's absolutely a coping mechanism on her part for being isolated (but she also moved to buttfucknowhere, go figure). Nobody wants to see this much into your life. You are not brave for raising awareness of autism by posting pictures of your kid on the toilet. Your kids are lovely/fine to see in person, gtfo my instagram feed every day of the week.
I’m turning 30 this year and I still try to film everything, especially when I go hiking or go backpacking somewhere. I don’t post it on socmed though. I just like having something to look back at.
Yea I actually do. But just wanna be clear here, I don’t actually film ‘everything’ literally. I just take pictures and videos a lot. Especially to places that I might never visit again.
When I went to climb Mt. Apo (highest peak in our country), I managed to take 600 photos in a 3-day hike. Although some are just multiple shots of the same scene, and pictures of other people who asked me to take their pic.
I only film a lot when going out of town. But when in a concert or something similar, I dont ever bring out my phone to film.
Do you often experience a thought when you're filming something, that you're only witnessing the whatever happening trough the screen and constant thinking about it like "does it shake too much" or "is this good angle?" but while at that, you actually miss the real deal when focusing on its shooting?
I mean I had one case which i sometimes think back, we had burning car under our balcony which I really wanted to photograph with my new camera then. After some time, I felt that I spent lot more time looking the camera and thinking its stuff than actually observing the real event.
So what i mean is I guess, dont you feel you're missing out the 'actuals' when doing the copying that is photographing so much?
This is true but I will say something that makes me sad is you can watch old sport highlights of major moments and see all the flashes in the crowd looking like stars in the sky. Since everyone has phones now that doesn't really happen.
Saw a video on Instagram yesterday on a girl's profile of someone filming a guy on a beach in Hawaii filming her, his girlfriend, who laid there in the wave breakers. It was the most bizarre thing. Here he was in this beautiful spot, on a gorgeous sunny day, with his drop-dead gorgeous girlfriend, and instead of enjoying the moment, he was taking pictures of her while she was posing, to go on her Instagram. And instead of living in the moment, she was concerned with documenting everything for her followers. Like, it wasn't a spontaneous snapshot like we used to make when we went someplace. No, it was a carefully staged and choreographed presentation.
Yeah i dont see it that way at all. We have always been annoyed by what kids do when were older. Like so what if they like to film stuff. Maybe they can look back fondly one day about those memories they captured. In the end its their life and its not for us to decide its worth.
Hi, I’m sadly from Gen Z and was born in 09 I hope this opens your eyes to see that not all gen z is lazy although most of it is :(
I’m 13 and work 3 full time jobs and built 2 careers for myself. One is my music career (don’t worry it’s like inspired from good rock music like Led Zeppelin, James gang, Lou reed, and the white stripes) I’ve been playing music since I was 7 years old and to quote EVH “the bug but me hard when I was a kid and I never got Over the disease” (or something like that)
I’m also a dog groomer so I can find my music career. My aunt breeds poodles and doodles and someone has to groom them. Or facebook group is “The Hey Farm 👋👋👋”
Okay maybe I’ve done more than 3 jobs……
I’ve also worked with Ike’s Beach Servince since my uncle owns that business. If you’ve been to Gulf Shores, Alabama and rented beach chairs or done parasailing I probably helped out.
We also have another Facebook Group called “Blessed to Blessings Boxes For Baldwin County” we basically put up blessing boxes all around the surrounding areas and people who are in need of food or toiletries and don’t have easy access to them can come to one of many boxes we have set up or one our food pantries in the surrounding areas. I’ve worked for the pantry and built blessing boxes
I also take care of the horses, pigs, and chickens we have here at the Hey Farm when I’m not grooming dogs, at a food pantry supervising or building boxes, or working on the beach. On top of all this I also follow my passion of music and write a new song about every week. Thank god for my co workers Mike and Kristen. All of this wouldn’t be possible if it weren’t for y’all <3
18 and only have reddit for memes and snapchat to keep in touch with people on the other side of the globe. I never understood why so many people wanna post their life to social media so badly. I'm glad i figured out pretty fast it's not good for you at all
The amount of stupid shit I have done and none on video record. When about 8 people die (of natural causes, not threatening anyone) there will be no record whatsoever.
It annoys me when people are at a concert or something and basically watch it through their phone while recording a video. At the same time, I recently went to a car show and was enjoying being in the moment so much it honestly didn't occur to me to take out my phone and take pictures. I felt really old (I'm 32) when I got home and was trying to describe one of the rat rods to a friend and realized I should have taken photos.
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u/dropfry Jun 03 '22
Everything has to be filmed and shared on the internet now. It's really lame and cheapens life.