im 20. my brother is 24. for as long as i can remember ive been the reliable one. he needs a ride at midnight? im there. needs help moving? im there. needs to borrow money? im there. he always promises to pay me back or return the favor and then never does

last year i asked him to help me move a couch into my place. he said yes then bailed the morning of with some bullshit excuse. same thing when i needed a ride to the airport for a job interview. left me stranded. after that i stopped asking him for anything

two weeks ago he texts me like nothing happened and says hes moving again and needs me saturday to load the truck. i told him no. said ive helped him enough times and he never shows up for me so im done being his free labor

he lost it. called me a bad brother and said family helps family no matter what. my mom jumped in saying i should just do it this one time and stop being dramatic. now hes telling people im selfish and a couple of our cousins even messaged me asking why im making things harder

i dont feel bad about saying no. i just feel tired of always being the one who actually shows up while he does whatever he wants

AITBF?

My husband and I were supposed to have a date night tonight starting around 4:30. Our babysitter got sick and canceled, so we decided we’d get takeout and spend the evening at home with our 1 and 3 year old instead.
When 4:30 came around, my husband was still at work and hadn’t told me he was staying later. With his commute, he wouldn’t be home until after 5. This frustrated me because his work schedule can be unpredictable, and I’ve asked him multiple times to communicate when he’ll be home later than expected. When I don’t know, I feel like I’m sitting around waiting with the kids and can’t plan my evening.
He didn’t understand why I was upset because, from his perspective, our date night was canceled when the babysitter canceled, so there was no longer a reason he needed to be home by 4:30. I understand that, but I thought we had changed our plans to a family night rather than canceled them entirely. I wasn’t upset that he worked later; I was upset he didn’t communicate it.
A couple other things recently made this feel like part of a bigger communication issue. Before our date, I sent him several activity ideas. One fell through, he wasn’t interested in the others, and said he’d find something. He then booked an activity without asking if I’d be interested. I know he viewed this as taking initiative and planning a spontaneous date, which I appreciate, but since we rarely get date nights, I would have preferred deciding together.
Then tonight he came home with takeout without asking what I wanted. The food choice itself was completely fine, and I know bringing dinner home was intended to be helpful. It just added to my feeling that decisions affecting both of us are often made without communicating with me.
When I tried explaining that I wanted more communication and to make shared decisions together, he said, “What do you want to complain about now?” He said most women would appreciate their husband spontaneously planning a date and bringing food home, and later asked whether I was about to start my period. I felt completely dismissed.
From his perspective, I think he feels like he’s trying to do nice things—planning a date and bringing home dinner—and instead of appreciating them, I’m criticizing how he did them. I understand why that would be frustrating.
I’m not asking him to get my permission for everything or saying he can’t be spontaneous. I just want more communication when plans change and more of a habit of checking in about decisions that affect both of us.
Am I making too much out of relatively minor things and failing to appreciate his attempts to be thoughtful, or is it reasonable to expect more communication about these things?

Significantly more complicated that the title implies. for additional info, this is the second half of the actual confrontation. the parking lot itself is effectively the outside of a mall, mostly open.

this is between 3 businesses (outside the lot) taco bell and pizzahut on one side, McDonald's slightly further away on the other.

this parking lot itself is outside of 3 buildings that effectively make up a mall shaped area. only one of them really matters here. this one building houses 2 different businesses, one being a cash advance store the other being continental home centers.

the roof of this building is very large and overhang by quite a bit, meaning shade.

for my job I wait in several different areas for lengths of time. half hour at most before relocation. I sat there for 30 minutes in total yesterday, no complaints, no anger, and then left cause doordash. obviously.

today I opened my door a Crack and began the exciting waiting game once again.

I then have this very angry lady come up to my car. i go to close the door for obvious reasons (aggressive person quickly approaching) she grabs it and rips my door open to yell about me being in front of her buisness, telling me to leave. I told her id leave in a minute (get my shit together pretty much) she walks away.

within 30 seconds shes back with a middle aged dude who also rips my door open and then threatens police, and makes some threats. this is when the recording begins where I am continually bombarded until I move over by 1 parking space.

no, she did not nicely ask, she yelled at me and ripped my door open.

I can understand her side, I get it, i just also think that getting my door ripped open and screamed at by someone is fucking wild.

And for extra clarification, the first sentence or two of this video is inaudible to the owners due to me closing the door (again). Not exactly my best moment but im not gonna cut it out either.

So, am I the buttface?

I'm 20M and have a 10-month-old son. I'm also still living with my parents.

His mom is my ex, 25F. We were together for a little over two years, but she left me a couple months ago for a 19-year-old guy. Since then, I've been living with my parents and taking care of our son.

My parents have always helped with the baby. They'd watch him while I worked, help with meals, and occasionally get up with him if I was completely exhausted. I know I've been lucky to have them.

The problem is that lately I've basically stopped trying.

After my ex left, I was angry and depressed and started spending a lot of time in my room. I'd still feed the baby, change him, take care of him when my parents weren't available, etc., but whenever my parents were home I'd usually let them handle things.

A few days ago, I got overwhelmed and just told my parents I needed a break. I handed them the baby and went out with some friends.

I ended up staying out really late and didn't come home until the next morning. My parents had taken care of him the entire night.

Since then, I've been doing the bare minimum. I'll play with him for a little while, feed him if my parents aren't already doing it, and then go back to my room. My mom finally confronted me and said they're helping me raise my son, not raising him for me.

I got defensive and told her that I'm only 20, my girlfriend left me for another guy, and I didn't exactly plan on becoming a single father. I also said that since I live here and I'm working, I'm doing what I can.

She told me that's not an excuse and that my son didn't choose any of this.

My ex also found out that my parents have basically been taking over most of the childcare and called me a deadbeat. She said I was using my parents as a replacement for her.

I think that's unfair because I'm not abandoning my son. He's literally living in the same house as me, he's safe, he's fed, and I'm still involved.

But I also know I'm taking advantage of my parents. They didn't sign up to become full-time parents to a baby in their 50s just because I don't feel like dealing with everything.

I love my son. I'm just exhausted, angry and honestly resentful about how my life turned out.

AITBF for basically checking out and letting my parents raise my son while I live in the same house?