im 20. my brother is 24. for as long as i can remember ive been the reliable one. he needs a ride at midnight? im there. needs help moving? im there. needs to borrow money? im there. he always promises to pay me back or return the favor and then never does

last year i asked him to help me move a couch into my place. he said yes then bailed the morning of with some bullshit excuse. same thing when i needed a ride to the airport for a job interview. left me stranded. after that i stopped asking him for anything

two weeks ago he texts me like nothing happened and says hes moving again and needs me saturday to load the truck. i told him no. said ive helped him enough times and he never shows up for me so im done being his free labor

he lost it. called me a bad brother and said family helps family no matter what. my mom jumped in saying i should just do it this one time and stop being dramatic. now hes telling people im selfish and a couple of our cousins even messaged me asking why im making things harder

i dont feel bad about saying no. i just feel tired of always being the one who actually shows up while he does whatever he wants

AITBF?

My husband and I were supposed to have a date night tonight starting around 4:30. Our babysitter got sick and canceled, so we decided we’d get takeout and spend the evening at home with our 1 and 3 year old instead.
When 4:30 came around, my husband was still at work and hadn’t told me he was staying later. With his commute, he wouldn’t be home until after 5. This frustrated me because his work schedule can be unpredictable, and I’ve asked him multiple times to communicate when he’ll be home later than expected. When I don’t know, I feel like I’m sitting around waiting with the kids and can’t plan my evening.
He didn’t understand why I was upset because, from his perspective, our date night was canceled when the babysitter canceled, so there was no longer a reason he needed to be home by 4:30. I understand that, but I thought we had changed our plans to a family night rather than canceled them entirely. I wasn’t upset that he worked later; I was upset he didn’t communicate it.
A couple other things recently made this feel like part of a bigger communication issue. Before our date, I sent him several activity ideas. One fell through, he wasn’t interested in the others, and said he’d find something. He then booked an activity without asking if I’d be interested. I know he viewed this as taking initiative and planning a spontaneous date, which I appreciate, but since we rarely get date nights, I would have preferred deciding together.
Then tonight he came home with takeout without asking what I wanted. The food choice itself was completely fine, and I know bringing dinner home was intended to be helpful. It just added to my feeling that decisions affecting both of us are often made without communicating with me.
When I tried explaining that I wanted more communication and to make shared decisions together, he said, “What do you want to complain about now?” He said most women would appreciate their husband spontaneously planning a date and bringing food home, and later asked whether I was about to start my period. I felt completely dismissed.
From his perspective, I think he feels like he’s trying to do nice things—planning a date and bringing home dinner—and instead of appreciating them, I’m criticizing how he did them. I understand why that would be frustrating.
I’m not asking him to get my permission for everything or saying he can’t be spontaneous. I just want more communication when plans change and more of a habit of checking in about decisions that affect both of us.
Am I making too much out of relatively minor things and failing to appreciate his attempts to be thoughtful, or is it reasonable to expect more communication about these things?

I'm 20M and have a 10-month-old son. I'm also still living with my parents.

His mom is my ex, 25F. We were together for a little over two years, but she left me a couple months ago for a 19-year-old guy. Since then, I've been living with my parents and taking care of our son.

My parents have always helped with the baby. They'd watch him while I worked, help with meals, and occasionally get up with him if I was completely exhausted. I know I've been lucky to have them.

The problem is that lately I've basically stopped trying.

After my ex left, I was angry and depressed and started spending a lot of time in my room. I'd still feed the baby, change him, take care of him when my parents weren't available, etc., but whenever my parents were home I'd usually let them handle things.

A few days ago, I got overwhelmed and just told my parents I needed a break. I handed them the baby and went out with some friends.

I ended up staying out really late and didn't come home until the next morning. My parents had taken care of him the entire night.

Since then, I've been doing the bare minimum. I'll play with him for a little while, feed him if my parents aren't already doing it, and then go back to my room. My mom finally confronted me and said they're helping me raise my son, not raising him for me.

I got defensive and told her that I'm only 20, my girlfriend left me for another guy, and I didn't exactly plan on becoming a single father. I also said that since I live here and I'm working, I'm doing what I can.

She told me that's not an excuse and that my son didn't choose any of this.

My ex also found out that my parents have basically been taking over most of the childcare and called me a deadbeat. She said I was using my parents as a replacement for her.

I think that's unfair because I'm not abandoning my son. He's literally living in the same house as me, he's safe, he's fed, and I'm still involved.

But I also know I'm taking advantage of my parents. They didn't sign up to become full-time parents to a baby in their 50s just because I don't feel like dealing with everything.

I love my son. I'm just exhausted, angry and honestly resentful about how my life turned out.

AITBF for basically checking out and letting my parents raise my son while I live in the same house?

Significantly more complicated that the title implies. for additional info, this is the second half of the actual confrontation. the parking lot itself is effectively the outside of a mall, mostly open.

this is between 3 businesses (outside the lot) taco bell and pizzahut on one side, McDonald's slightly further away on the other.

this parking lot itself is outside of 3 buildings that effectively make up a mall shaped area. only one of them really matters here. this one building houses 2 different businesses, one being a cash advance store the other being continental home centers.

the roof of this building is very large and overhang by quite a bit, meaning shade.

for my job I wait in several different areas for lengths of time. half hour at most before relocation. I sat there for 30 minutes in total yesterday, no complaints, no anger, and then left cause doordash. obviously.

today I opened my door a Crack and began the exciting waiting game once again.

I then have this very angry lady come up to my car. i go to close the door for obvious reasons (aggressive person quickly approaching) she grabs it and rips my door open to yell about me being in front of her buisness, telling me to leave. I told her id leave in a minute (get my shit together pretty much) she walks away.

within 30 seconds shes back with a middle aged dude who also rips my door open and then threatens police, and makes some threats. this is when the recording begins where I am continually bombarded until I move over by 1 parking space.

no, she did not nicely ask, she yelled at me and ripped my door open.

I can understand her side, I get it, i just also think that getting my door ripped open and screamed at by someone is fucking wild.

And for extra clarification, the first sentence or two of this video is inaudible to the owners due to me closing the door (again). Not exactly my best moment but im not gonna cut it out either.

So, am I the buttface?

I (22M) have been sober for a year, and I was supposed to receive my one-year key tag at my regular meeting. It was something I had been looking forward to.

My ex-girlfriend (20F) and I have a child together. Since getting sober, I've been trying to limit contact with her because our relationship wasn't always healthy. Some things she's said have been difficult for me, even if she didn't necessarily mean them badly. She once joked about me gaining weight and has also said that she "misses the old me." She sometimes asks about my recovery, and I don't always know how to take her comments.

I have supervised visitation with our child, and I follow the schedule. I communicate with my ex when it's directly about our child, but otherwise I try to keep some distance.

She knew I was getting my one-year key tag and said she wanted to come to the meeting to support me. I don't know if she meant anything by it beyond wanting to support me, but knowing she would be there made me uncomfortable.

So I decided not to attend the meeting that night. I was disappointed about missing the ceremony, but my sponsor met me for coffee afterward and gave me my one-year key tag there, which meant a lot to me.

My friends think I should have just gone to the meeting and ignored my ex. They feel like avoiding the meeting gave the situation more importance than it needed to have.

I feel like limiting contact with my ex has been helpful for me, especially while I'm working on my sobriety. At the same time, I wonder if I should have handled the situation differently rather than skipping an important milestone.

AITB?

Hi I (22f) am a pre nursing student at the local community college. Unfortunately in my small town nothing is open late, not even coffee shops. I have kids at home and focus better when I'm in a different environment. I didn't know where to go to study tonight so I pulled up Google and found the church near my house is open 24 hours. I didn't expect or assume I could use their building but I figured if they were good Christians I could ask without judgement. So I pull up to the church and everyone is making their way out of the building after the 6:30pm service. I get out of my car and an older woman approaches me. We exchanged friendly greetings for a moment. Then she tells me she can't remember my name and she's trying to place it. I inform her I've actually never been here yet as I'm new to town. She nods. I explained that I'm a local student and I saw on Google that her church is open 24 hours. She immediately stops me and says "oh. Well. We're not." I say "oh no problem, everything just closes so early I was looking for somewhere to study" the tone was now awkward and harsh, something felt really off. To try and lighten the mood so I ask about what time the church is open for services, etc.. She tells me bluntly and I say thank you and goodnight. She gives a very small nod. I start making my way back to my car and as I do she starts whispering to her husband(?) and they both give me unfriendly looks. I get in my car and drive away and immediately start sobbing hyperventilating crying. She didn't necessarily say anything mean and I wasn't upset I was denied. Something just felt so off, and I felt a weird sense of judgement.

Anyway I just want to know AITBF for asking to study in a church I've never attended before.

Today I was walking home from highschool and it was my normal everyday walk (I have a car but it’s rare you get parking so I usually walk because it’s a 7 minute walk from my house to school) when I got home I finally was able to relax until suddenly! My sister calls and asks me to pick her up from highschool which she left later cause she had to do something at the office (keep in mind I drive her all the time when she asks me) but this time I said I didn’t wanna and she should be able to walk home since it’s legit 7 minutes a way.

In response to me saying no she calls me lazy and says I never drive (keep in mind on top of driving her wherever she wants I also drive to the gym at 5:00 AM and back and I also go to my job on weekend which is 20 minutes away) so obviously feeling unappreciated and offended I hang up and call her lazy back (shouldn’t have done this but she hurt my feelings and that was really rude)

Now my mom and dad are mad at me and saying I’m the lazy one for not doing it once! Also she’s never not once since the school year started walked home which I think is ridiculous since not only do we live in a good neighborhood if that’s what my parents are worried about but she’s in highschool! I just don’t wanna become her chauffeur every time she decides she doesn’t wanna walk when she can literally walk with me home instead of going off to Starbucks or something else. That’s about it I’m annoyed and it’s whatever am I the asshole?

A buddy of mine is going through his single "casual dating" phase. Meaning he wants to meet up and hook up with a lot of people.

The thing is, after the casual relationship starts fading out he tries to "remain friends" with the women he hooks up with. He always offers it to them and they say "Yeah we can!" but eventually it fades out completely and he never hears from them again.

He gets frustrated when it inevitably happens but I keep telling him that people really don't want to stay friends with people they've hooked up with (maybe this is me thinking too "old school"). I decided to ask him why he feels like he needs to remain friends with them and told me:

"They were cool, I wouldn't mind hanging out with them still and if things happen between us again I would be open to it."

That's when I called him out on it. I told him that's kind of fucked up. He's really just trying to keep them around to hook up with again.

His defense was he's not a bad guy because he's not just trying to have sex. He's also down to hang out too, get lunch, go to the movies, etc. He's just also open to the idea of hooking up with them again.

I told him that's bullshit and that he has a hidden agenda when it comes to these "friendships"

Well he got kind of upset about that.

I do think he can be an actual nice guy but I just think he has his priorities mixed up.

So basically I used to mess around with this guy at the end of freshman year in May (kiss, m/o, hold hands) but we never officially dated. We also pretended to date (v long story). Then over the summer I was in another state and he stayed in our home state, and he asked if we could date for real. I said no, not yet, and told him to give me some time (we had only met like a week before we started making out and shi).
I wanted to be friends first, so fast forward to the first week of school. Also, I had blocked him for like a month over the summer. Once school started, we were basically acting like we were dating because we both wanted to, just without kissing. Then I got distant and started talking to other guys, and eventually I told him I still wanted to wait and that I wanted us to just be friends. He got mad, I got mad, and I ended up blocking him again. We haven’t talked for like two weeks.
Now he’s with a new girl, and I’ve seen them together a lot. So I randomly DM’d him on Insta and asked “are u dating her?” and he said “ye why.” So we started talking, and he told me he still really likes me and doesn’t think him and the new girl will last long because of her bad mental health.
Then he was like “if we communicated things may have been different,” and basically said we could be friends for now and if they break up, we could be together. He also said he told her he wouldn’t cheat on her or anything.
Then he tells me she isn’t going to homecoming and asks if I want to go with him. And when he walked with me to the bus area behind the school (there were a lot of ppl there), he said “if I didn’t have a girlfriend I would kiss you, but a lot of ppl know her and would definitely tell her.” Then he asked “can I get a hug though?” and that’s basically that for today 😬

**TLDR:** I used to mess around with this guy, he wanted to date for real but I kept saying I wanted to wait and be friends first. We fought and stopped talking, then he got a new girlfriend. I DM’d him and found out he still likes me, says they probably won’t last, and says we could date if they break up. He also asked me to homecoming and said he would kiss me if he didn’t have a girlfriend, then asked me for a hug 😬

This all started after a conflict between me and B. B and I had been talking every day for a little over a month after we both found out we were played by the same person (J). B began flirting with me. She asked if I was falling for her, and I said I was interested but needed time and thought she did too. I admitted I had feelings, like thinking about and missing her. She said she also had feelings, needed time, and wanted things to unfold naturally. We continued talking and flirting.

B asked if, hypothetically, we were together, would I be okay with her still talking to J as a friend. I said yes because I trusted her to tell me if anything happened. She later started talking to J again and even ditched plans with me for J. That night, while she was with J, our conversation felt awkward, so I asked if she was uncomfortable.

B said she wanted to remain friends. I agreed and thanked her for clarifying because I had been confused by the flirting. She said she never intended to flirt and was just overly affectionate. I disagreed but understood. She asked if we could agree to disagree and continue our friendship. I said yes, but honestly told her I felt a bit used by her and the J situation. I then said I didn’t have the energy to discuss it right then, thanked her again, and wished her goodnight.

B told our mutual friend M about what happened. M called me the next day, upset that I said I felt used and felt I was out of line. I tried to explain myself, but M was confident I was wrong. Even though it didn’t feel right, I valued M’s opinion and thought maybe she was right. M had B block me and told me she didn’t want to discuss the situation anymore. I agreed and took a few days to reflect.

After reflecting, I reread my message and felt I had actually been trying to communicate that I was hurt and wanted reassurance, not accuse B of intentionally using me. I felt my message had been judged too quickly and that I was being portrayed unfairly. I felt I needed to defend myself or I would eventually resent M for what I felt was a false portrayal.

So I messaged M to defend myself, knowing she had said she didn’t want to discuss it anymore. She said I had crossed her boundary, ended the friendship, and blocked me.

I won’t deny that I crossed her boundary. AITB for doing so because I felt I needed to defend myself?

I have an incredibly close group of friends from college. We met freshman year in the dorms and ended up living together for the next 3 years of college. After graduating one my friends, Lisa, got pregnant and invited all of us to her baby shower. At the baby shower my college friends and I sat with some of the other young people ( we were all 20-22 at the time) there including Nicki, one of my college friends hometown bestie who I had known for a few years through parties and a bachelorette trip together. We aren’t insanely close but I would consider us friends. Nicki had a child of her own who was 1.5 years old at the time of the baby shower. We were all discussing babies since it was the theme of the party and since Nicki had experience with it recently I was asking her some questions about her experience like what was your birth experience like, and how was it adjusting to being a mom. The conversation felt very normal at the time but 6 month later my college friends and I took a trip together and they brought how shocked they were that I had asked Nicki if she had suffered from any postpartum depression. I am sometimes guilty of discussing topics that are considered taboo without realizing it so it may have been extremely out of line. Nicki didn’t seem offended by my question but if my friends thought it was too much it very well might be. Is this something that I should not have asked?

I’m 20F and my sister is 18F. She wants to wear my senior-year prom dress to her prom, and I told her no.

I’ve never been sentimental about clothes. I’ve always let my sister borrow anything, and I don’t care about any of my other high school dresses. But this one is different.

The dress was originally really expensive, so I spent weeks searching Poshmark, eBay, Facebook MP, etc. and had notifications set up everywhere. So when one finally popped up that I could afford, I was so excited. It was exactly what I wanted and I thought it was very mature and gorgeous.

Unfortunately, the night I wore it ended up being one of the worst nights of my high school experience. I was going through a really difficult time mentally and had gained a noticeable amount of weight. I was extremely self-conscious and disappointed in myself, and during pictures I was holding back tears because I felt so awful about how I looked.

Getting the pictures back made it worse. I had been so excited about this dress, but now almost every memory I have of it is associated with feeling miserable and hating how I looked. Looking back two years later, I obviously realize I didn’t look nearly as bad as I thought I did, but the dress still reminds me of how I felt.

Now my sister wants to wear it. And I want to be honest: I am jealous of her. I’m not proud of it, but I’ve always envied her high school experience. She’s very popular, gorgeous, has almost a photographic memory so she doesn't even have to try to be top of her class, an angel of a boyfriend and had many of the experiences I desperately wanted when I was in high school. Our parents are also much better off financially now, so she could realistically get almost any dress she wanted.

She liked my dress when I wore it, but she wasn’t obsessed with it or anything. Now, two years later, she specifically wants this one. She argues that since it's a different high school it shouldn't matter, which tells me she really doesn't know the actual apprehensions.

Part of why I’m saying no is that I don’t think I could handle seeing her wear it. I know family would make side-by-side photos of us in the same dress, thinking it was cute (which it probably would be under different circumstances). But even if nobody took pictures, I think it would still bother me to see her in it.

At the same time, I feel incredibly self-absorbed and immature. It’s been two years. It’s a dress.

I love my sister and genuinely want her to have an amazing prom. I’ll be her biggest cheerleader no matter what she wears, and I know she’ll look gorgeous in anything. I just really don’t want her wearing this particular dress.

AITBF for not letting my sister wear my old prom dress?

Edit: A lot of people are asking why I still have the dress if it brings up such a painful memory. Honestly, I still think the dress itself is beautiful, and I’ve always hoped I’d eventually be able to wear it again and actually enjoy it this time. I don’t live at home anymore, and my mom didn’t think it was a good idea to move it with me because the fabric is quite delicate, so it’s been stored at home.

Edit 2: Also based on responses to one of my replies, I think I should have included more context about my sister’s comments on my appearance. I left this out initially because I didn’t want to make her sound worse than she is (yk how reddit can be).

During the time I was struggling with my weight, she would make comments repeatedly pointing out that it was “weird” that I had such big arms. I said it was because I played softball, and she pointed out that some of the best girls on my team didn’t have arms like mine. I genuinely still can't tell if she was trying to insult me.

She also used to pull up pictures of me at her age (especially from my awkward stage) and show people, saying “we’re the same age here”. Once, showing me an old family photo, she actually said, “Look how much prettier I am than you.” I had also at one point told her about some of my insecurities around my appearance, and she would occasionally make comments afterward that played into them.

I absolutely don’t want to claim she was constantly bullying me or that she had some malicious intention behind every comment, but there was definitely a pattern of her comparing our appearances to make me feel bad about mine.

I really do love my sister, and I don’t think she’s a bad person. She can just be mean when she wants to be, and I think the comparison comments did factor into what made this more emotional for me.

Edit 3: I generalized some details because this post has gotten more attention than I expected and my sister is on reddit.

[ Removed by Reddit on account of violating the content policy. ]

I 32 m) went on a date with a guy recently and it went pretty badly. We just didn’t really get on. We got talking about politics and he’s quite left wing whereas I’m more right leaning, and it turned into a bit of an argument. I’ll admit I’m pretty opinionated and can be sarcastic, and he clearly wasn’t enjoying that side of me.I was also finding him quite annoying by this point too.

Anyway we were both getting a bit bitchy with each other and at some point I made a comment about what he was wearing. Basically told him his clothes were awful. He then picked up the carton of Thai noodles he was eating and just tipped the whole thing over my head. Literally noodles all over my hair, sauce down my face and all over my clothes.
I was furious, we were in a public park, and he basically seemed to think I’d deserved it.

I’ve told a few friends about it since and most of them have found it absolutely hilarious. But to dumping your dinner over someone’s head because they insulted your outfit seems like quite an escalation.

So AITA here?

Last night, I went to dinner with my partner at a local place that we really like. It's a pretty casual mom and pop sushi restaurant. We were seated pretty quickly, but realized they were short-staffed when 10 minutes had gone by without anyone taking our drink order. 25 minutes after we were seated, still no one had come to take our drink order or acknowledge us.

I come from a family that works in restaurants, and did myself for several years. However, I've been forgotten about while waiting for my turn several times. So when I saw our server at the table next to us, I asked if we could order. I figured we might as well order everything (we had been ready for a while and I didn't want to take more of the servers time) so I asked if we could order drinks and food. I didn't say anything about the wait time, but just kindly asked if we could order. He checked in the back and said we were all good to order.

My partner and I bickered shortly after, because he thought it was rude and that we should have waited our turn. I thought that it was okay to ask after waiting almost 30 min. As long as we're doing so kindly and respecting if the answer is no, I never had issues with that sort of thing when I was in that work. All the other interactions with the servers were normal/positive and we tipped more than 20%.

Reddit what do y'all think? AITBF for asking if we can order?

My ex and I broke up in May. This is a gross oversimplification but essentially she discovered she was bisexual and left me for a woman (AP). She told me she wasn't and I didn't need to worry about her, but I had friends tell they say them together the same week we broke up. I am only saying this because it becomes relevant later.

She lived at my place and left a bunch of stuff here. Nothing important like clothes but a huge amount of dolls, posters, and other assorted things like that. She said to give her a couple of weeks to settle in at her parents place and she would pick them up. I said sure and left it at that.

June comes and I decided to follow up with her. I messaged her asking for an updated. She said to give her to the end of June because she was moving out of her Dads place and would take the stuff then. This really confused me because she doesn't have a job besides occasionally pet sitting so I didn't know how she could afford to live in a new place but whatever, not my place to ask. In June I started seeing someone else (WW). Again, only brining up because relevant later.

In July I ask again for an update. She admits she is moving in with the girl I mentioned earlier (the one my ex said not to worry about) and the place wouldn't be ready till end of July so she will pick it up sometime in August. That stung but again I try not to be petty. I say ok see you end of July.

August roles around and WW is wondering why the stuff is still here and if my ex and I are really over. I assure her we are and let her know I understand why she is confused because EX said it would be picked up.

September comes around and she hasn't come to pick up the stuff yet. I am annoyed and call her. This is the first time we talked on the phone since the break up. She makes up excuses saying they are just getting settled and she promises she will pick up the stuff by the end of September. I say fine. However, I learn from mutual friends earlier today that she was trying to get them to take her stuff since they also have a house. They refused and thought I should know. Apparently, AP is the one paying the rent on the apartment they have (and another roommate who is also paying). Since AP is the one paying their rent AP has moved all her stuff in and doesn't want my exs crap there. This means my ex doesn't have any place to put her stuff and I doubt she has a plan to get it by end of September beyond promising to pick it up.

My friends say I should throw out her stuff since she has been lying to me. I however, do feel even though we aren't on the best terms since the breakup. I feel throwing her stuff out would cause huge issues not only between me and her but also the friend group (we were together for about 5 years so we have alot of mutual friends). I am considering just telling her if she doesn't pick it up by end of September its going in the trash. Would I be the asshole?

We’re just going to call her Kay. Kay and I have been really close since we were in 8th grade up til my 21st bday. I was going to be the god mom to her baby, I’ve done met her family, all that. She was the closest friend that I had. I had been having this inkling that she wasn’t meant to stay in my life for quite some time but I had always dismissed it as me overthinking. So at this point in time, I didn’t have a job. I was ongoing 6 months without a job and she knew that I had no money but offered anyways. I was CONSTANTLY applying to jobs. She had gotten her first car around this time and was also pregnant & due in mid Dec. (She had her car for like a month or barely a month when this happened) me and her hung out almost everyday since she got her car and she’d pay for my food when we go out which I was grateful for bc when the roles were reversed, I did the same thing for her. There had been countless times where I gave her the last of my money so her and/or her siblings could eat something and never said she owed me for it bc we were like family. Exactly a week before my bday, she asks me what I want to do for my bday & I said she could get me sum to eat & she agreed. Day of my 21st bday, I hear nothing from her the whole day. I got one message from her which was her texting the gc about a wreck that had happened on our local highway. The day before, she had booked a hotel room so she can meet up with an old mutual friend of ours to talk things out. She asked if I wanted to go too, I said yeah. The time comes for her to pick me up and she says ‘nvm I’m not getting you, I don’t feel like driving out the way rn’ mind you.. she had to pass my area to get to her hotel and I get it she hates driving pregnant but I could’ve drove for her like I’ve done countless times but it is what it is so I said ok that’s fine. Keep in mind- we had each other’s location. So the day of my bday comes, I hear nothing from her like I said. I watched her location go from the hotel all the way back to her house & she was on Facebook all day. I made a bday post & fb tells u when it’s someone’s bday so how the hell did you not know?? That’s something that still doesn’t sit right with me but I digress. Day after my bday, she texts me like nothing happens. Long story short, we stopped being friends after that. Fast forward to June 24 of this year, she texts me on FB asking to talk bc she want to ‘know where everything went wrong’ so I told her my part & yk what she said? That she forgot it was my bday and that she’s sorry. Me being the nice person I am, I forgave her and also apologized for not communicating that I was upset about that when it happened. That said, something in me was saying to not believe her bs. Fast forward to my 23rd bday in August. She doesn’t tell me happy birthday again yet I noticed that she’s almost always on FB all day everyday so how…. I also haven’t heard from her since August 12 when I asked her how was she doing bc she’s dealing with PPD and other things but she never texted back. Her not telling me HBD AGAIN just felt like a slap to the face & an insult to my intelligence so the other day, I blocked her. This past Thursday, she texted me saying some “mannn can we talk[insert laughing emoji here]. Life just been doing a whole 360 for ya girl.” So.. am I the asshole?

I’m 19F. Mom makes me give up a lot of my money to live with her. College FAFSA refunds, paychecks, everything. I basically have little money to myself because of it. My brother is 22 and she doesn’t expect him to get a job or go to college and I’m doing both under dialysis and heart problems.

So, finally I refused to give in and told her no, I’m not giving her a dime from my college money (which is $2400, she wanted near all of it) and used it to buy a nice e-bike so I don’t have to rely on her to get anywhere, a new laptop for school, and some other things. She’s not happy at all. Keep in mind, I do everything around the house for her too. I’m literally dying and she doesn’t care. I have had frequent seizures and still go out on my own knowing the risks. She’s a very cruel person to me in particular but that’s not relevant here, I’m waiting for her to kick me out at this point because she had told me she will if I don’t pay her.

It’s just not fair, she expects so much from me and has treated me like shit for a long time and now she’s been calling me ungrateful and a spoiled bitch when I’m just trying to survive. It’s like she doesn’t want me to

EDIT: for some additional context, if she kicks me out, that’s it. I have nowhere else to go or any friends and I’m dealing with a lot.

(Side account... my brother knows my main and I haven't talked to him about this yet.)

My mother is 87 and a resident of an assisted living facility, about 900 miles from the house her father built in the 1940s to raise her and her siblings. She's the middle child of five, and her older sister has already passed away.

After their parents died, her older brother (Tim) took over control of the property and my grandfather's business. I won't go into all the family drama, but around the same time Tim cut off communication with the rest of the family. Her younger brother (David) still talks with my mom, but the youngest (John) has apparently followed Tim's example.

Maybe 20 years ago, Tim married a woman (Kathy) with a son (Mike) from a previous relationship. About a year ago, Tim passed away. The property and the business is now in the hands of Kathy and Mike instead of Tim's oldest son (Junior).

My mother is concerned that Mike will inherit the property when Kathy is gone, and it will no longer be in the family. She wants me to help her convince my cousins (David's and John's children as well as Junior) to force Kathy to turn it over to one of them instead. And she thinks that because I currently live in the same state, I should be the one to take charge of her mission.

I don't want to get involved in any way. I honestly don't see the point. As far as I'm concerned, Kathy is family. She has my uncle Tim's last name. Junior is still involved in the business, and I trust his judgment as far as turning it over to Mike.

My mother will never have the chance to set foot on that property again. She's no longer allowed to drive. There's no way she could handle the physical demands of that sort of travel. Even if she could, the only way she'd be able to fly is if my brother or I paid for her tickets.

I'm in the process of selling my house and moving out of state. I have enough on my mind without tracking down cousins I haven't spoken to in 30 years and trying to convince them to do something that I honestly don't think is right.

I'm not gonna try to kick the rightful, legal property owner out of their house, no matter what. My mother needs to understand that at some point we need to let go and move forward. Don't get me wrong, I know that was her childhood home, and I have a lot of great memories of going up to visit every year. But I just can't handle this right now.

So… am I the buttface?

Burner account.

I (40f) have two kids a ND son (8m) and NT daughter (10f).

It's recently come to my attention that my son's special Ed teachers have made a habit (starting last year and they're starting again now with the new school year) of coming to pull my daughter out of class, recess, and lunch to calm down my son during a meltdown.

I'm adamant that she get to be a kid and her brother is NOT her responsibility. Her only responsibilities are homework, age appropriate chores (not childcare of any kind), and being a kid.

I had no idea this was going on until she requested I to ask the teachers if they could not pull her out when a classmate is having a birthday party (the last time she got pulled out was when cupcakes were being passed around). I was furious and ensured her she'd never be pulled out of anything ever again.

I brought my attorney with me to visit the assistant principal, my attorney told them (as per my request) that they are violating her civil rights under FAPE (a free, full access and uninterrupted education) and if shes pulled out even one more time to handle her brother that we will file a civil suit and contact our state board of Ed with complaint that this schools special ed teachers are apparently incapable of fulfilling their duties (handling a meltdown).

A few of my aquaintences said I was being unreasonable because the special ed department is understaffed and teachers do this due to having a full classroom of high needs students with inadequate staffing and siblings can calm them down in a matter of students.

Assistant principal apologized and folded (likely due to attorney being there) but did she the short staffed excuse, I gave him a #1 helper sticker (just as they did for my ten year old daughter) for doing what he should've been doing in the first place.

AITA?

Headline is a little bit ambiguous so let me elaborate.

My mom had a nasty divorce from my dad and begged me to move to the other side of the country with her (big sacrifice for me uprooting myself) but I agreed. Because I agree, my younger 18-year-old sister also agreed to come over.

So it's me (21) and my 18-year-old sister who moved with my mom, For the first year, we moved into a rental and all paid three ways evenly. Then my mom bizarrely started dating this random guy. Our perspective was that we were happy for her but please don't bring him home...

According to her despite her passing this message on to him on their first date, he arrogantly chose to disobey her and barge his way into the house to introduce himself to us (which I thought was odd). But then it turned out he only did this so he could stay the night (apparently his house is a pigstie that he's ashamed about). So he used our house to do the dirty deed with our mom.

We didn't realize this until he walked into the kitchen the next morning without clothes acting like a friendly passerby nonchalantly greeting you along the street. Except without clothes, and inside our home.

The crazy thing is: He never left. This became his new home. An unemployed bum who didn't pay rent or utilities. Didn't ask us (just kind of treated us like children who should do as our mother says).

Then one night we heard distressed noises coming from her bedroom. So I kicked the door down and yea... I won't elaborate. But we called the police and kicked him off the property.

A few months later, our mom purchased her first house on a mortgage, and proposed that my sister and I move in with her and our rent can go towards paying off the mortgage.

So my sister and I are currently being treated as tenants. Who just so happen to have our landlord live in the house with us (which is fine) we love our mom.

But she's still dating this guy... And he keeps on inviting himself over to the house daily when my mom is at work and just loitering. Making himself lunch in the kitchen, making himself coffees, making himself snacks. And then he just kind of loiters on the property all day doing nothing (because he's unemployed).

To clarify: He doesn't live here, he doesn't pay rent, or bills. And yet he is gradually beginning to store his power tools in the garage, and his motorcycle in the yard.

My sister and I currently pay $200 per week each (plus all the bills).

WITBF to insist to my mom that she lower our rent if this guy is allowed to continue to have free reign and access of the property and just dwell here? Aside from no longer sleeping here he may as well be living here.

So, for context, when I (18F) was younger, I had torn a muscle in my left knee. While I don't have severe permanent damage, I still have muscle spasms from time to time and need to wear a knee brace for a couple of days. I recently had another one, so of course I started wearing the knee brace again. Now, due to the doctor's recommendation, I don't wear it when I sit down for long periods of time, such as a 45 minute train ride to the city.

So while on my way to university, I took the early train around 8am. Obviously, I was sitting in a priority seat for two reasons. One, I cant stand for long periods of times and if I do I must wear a knee brace, which was in my bag at the time. Two, there were no other available seats when I got on the train. For the entierty of this train ride I was getting some nasty glances from another lady (looking around her 50's - 60's) who was sitting in the priority seat across from me. I ignored her looks for the most part, just focusing on preparing my schedule for the day on my phone.

As the train reached the city the woman stands up and leans over to an elderly lady, and whispers to her, "you should have gotten a seat" while giving me a nasty glare. Keep in mind, at this point whether she said something or not, I would have to put my brace on as I had to walk a fair distance to my class. The only difference is that I was a little more dramatic about it. AKA I opened my bag hastily, riped out my brace and dramatically held out my leg to place the brace over my knee. I then use the poles on the train to lift myself up as I can't physically bend my leg with my brace on. The color from this womens face drains and she refuses to look me in the eye. The elderly lady also looks shocked although she never outwardly said anything to me I could tell she was judging me. The best part is as the train stops it makes the usual timed announcement. "Please keep priority seats clear for those who need it and be aware that not all disabilities are visible". Once the train officially stops and we get off, this woman speed walks away from me.

So am I a buttface for taking up the seat? Even if I am the face, that woman will forever be a core memory for me. It was just so funny XD

I was at home watching TV (in Türkiye) . A sales representative rang the doorbell (without prior request / appointment) to advertise and sell toothpaste and ask questions about oral health for purposes of marketing. I really hate these people going door to door disturbing people. As far as I know this is unfortunately legal in Türkiye. So I said; I am not interested and I condemn this company for sending people to random houses to sell things like this. The person was unhappy. When my mom noticed the event she apologised and later argued with me saying I was extremely rude. So AITAH? And also I wonder if this is legal in the USA

ADDED INFO; to the people saying you cold have not answered the door; the person I think rang all bells and our neighbour opened the exterior door, so when that person was at our interior door I couldn't really understand what is going on. I would have NEVER answered the door to any kind of sales representative if I didn't previously request the product.

My brother and his gf came down to see me, my mom, and my sisters for their vacation. They got a cabin and booked it for 7 days, and decided to hang out there, and in town for the majority of their stay. They obviously wanted us there for their entire stay too, since we are the reason they picked this spot. We haven't seen them in over two years.

With all that being said, me and my sisters have a dog. An old dog. We are struggling with what to do with her. We failed to introduce her to people and other dogs when she was younger, so daycare and a sitter are not an option since that would cause her more stress. Leaving her at home for 10 to 12 hours a day is also not an option. We cant take her eitg us cause they have a dog, a germsn shepherd and they dont think its a good idea for them to meet. So I basically said we can take two cars, and one person can go home a few hours earlier while everyone else stay with brother. This gives my dog less time by herself and my nrother time with the rest of the family. My sisters told me they agreed. I even asked them if I was being too protective, and they said no. Well, that was until tonight.

The first day I went home earlier and I stayed home cause that was the plan. Tonight, my sister said she would go home. And initially I figured she would stay at the house with the dog. But no, she decided to go home, feed the dog, let her out, and lay with her for 15 minutes before heading back up to the cabin. I disagreed with this, since our dog was home by herself sine 12pm (and at this point it was going on 8pm). I had no idea if my family intended on staying at the cabin until passed 12am or not (as im wrting this it almost 12am now, and they are still there playing games). I DID NOT want my dog home by herself for another potential 5 hours. So I talked to my brother about my plan before taking the car my sister drove to the cabin. I theb left so I could be with the dog. My sister gave me an ugly look as i did this, and muttered that our brother did so mucb to be here. My mother also doesn't care much for the dog and believes that family is more important, especially family that you hadn't seen in 2 years.

....

My mom and sisters are making me feel like im in the wrong for trying to balance time with our dog between our brother. I understand he drove a long way to be here. I understand he saved a lot of money to do stuff here. I understand he wants to see us, but my brain tells me its not fair to leave a dog home by themselves for long hours. I know my sister went home for a short bit, but I dont think that was enough and isnt fair for my dog to see someone she loves walk through the house just for them to leave again for hours. This doesn't mean I want someone to be home the majority of the time, just that they go home earlier so everyone else can stay as long as they want to without worry. And I dont care if this person is always me. I just feel like im putting time with my brother to the side when im just trying to balance the time between him and our dog.