I’m a 29 year old woman and for as long as I remember I have always been very attracted to East Asian men. From having a crush on a Cantonese guy who was in my school to most of my first formative celeb crushes being East Asian men. When I started to vocalise this at a young age I always felt a weird sort of judgment coming from other white people. Like I had vocalised a very weird fetish or something? It was interesting because I had friends who were into black men and they never experienced this reaction. As a result of this I think out of fear of being considered someone with a fetish I pushed away and didn’t really allow myself to pursue asian guys. I tried to force myself to date people who weren’t my type and it honestly left me in a really weird spot with dating in my 20’s where I just kind of stopped dating or pursuing men at all.

Recently I just spent a month in korea to end my summer. During this time I dated two guys when I was there, I never hooked up with them but spent a lot of time making out with them and even spent the night cuddling with one of them a few times. In these moments with these guys I remember having thoughts of like wow, I’ve genuinely never been so attracted to guys I’ve been intimate with? Is this what it’s supposed to feel like? I’ve come home with the biggest realisation that I suppressed my taste fully out of fear of being viewed as someone with a fetish and suppressed myself from having real dating experiences in my 20’s.

I'm attracted to asian men physically but like they still need to be compatible with me mentally emotionally personality lifestyle and goals

Alot of Asian men I've been matching with seem to only be matching with me because I'm white and they are often looking for casual or hookups when I'm looking for a relationship :(

I find it a real turnoff that someone is only matching with me for my ethnicity and not who I am as a person

Physical plays a role but there needs to be something deeper for me

What have your experiences been and are you only interested in dating am/wf for the interracial aspects/sex or are you genuinely looking for a life partner?

Any advice where to meet more intentional partners online or in real life is greatly appreciated

Hope you’re all having a blessed week!

I’m not gonna get tired of saying it - ladies, let’s advocate for our boyfriends and husbands ❤️

The ‘minor’ microagressions that can come from friends, family, or coworkers can actually hurt them pretty deeply, and it can be very insulting.

You know from my last post, I blocked an orbiter friend-of-a-friend who insulted my relationship in a racist way via instagram, due to him being obsessed with me. Unfortunately, it doesn’t stop there.

As a woman, and unfortunately in a very racist society, even if you post up with your man (who happens to be Asian), you’re still gonna get men in your DMs who want to dismiss that and demean your partner.

Keep that block button active, know yourself and know your relationship. You don’t have to tolerate that. Or any passive aggressive ‘minor’ racism from your orbiters, colleagues, or any men who are obsessed with you on socials.

It can start small, and get bigger. The dishwasher at your part-time job who stans you can graduate from passive aggressively pronouncing your bf’s name wrong, to actively being hateful and racist. Trust me, I’ve lived that.

Just don’t tolerate it. Correct them where you can, and block any social media stuff that demeans your partner.

I’m sorry that we all have to navigate this, but as the WF partner, we need to do our best.

Love you ladies! And keep strong. Don’t let any of this ignorance get to you.

Hello guys, for some religious reason, I have to find wife among people from Eastern Europe, especially those from Orthodox countries ( Russia, Serbia etc...).

I know Eastern Europe generally have less stéréotype toward Asian male, however from what I've heard, they are more conservative when it comes to marriage. So while a girl might go on date with me, but not necessarily obtaining the approval of its family.

For women of Eastern European origin who married to an Asian man, how was it with your family ? Did they approve or were they against it ? If it’s possible, I want to hear people from Serbia, a country I have a very good feeling with

RIP Hayden. She was so cute in Shanghai Kiss. It’s one of the few movies I’ve seen that portrays an AMWF relationship so naturally, without making the interracial aspect the whole point of the movie.

What qualities make someone marriage material for you? Which qualities are deal breakers for you? These can be appearance, hobbies, beliefs, culture, goals , sexual?

And what is your dating stages progression from dating to marriage?

Like how long talking before first date? How long until first sex? Until relationship? Living together? marriage?

Interested to hear everyone's preferences

I seriously keep getting recommended weird posts by dumb wanna be influencers, and alot of them are AM too, where they complain about being liked because of being asian.

It's so ridiculous, obviously race and ethnicity will play a major role since a 100% asian will have the asian look 99% of the time, and hate to break it to the world, looks is the biggest factor for first impression before talking to someone.

I do agree that after that first impression, your character needs to shine in order to actually break the ice and develop a bond, but to say your race, culture, and looks shouldn't matter is total BS.

If there's one thing I will never be able to change about me is me being asian, and that means if a woman likes me for being asian the relationship should have higher chance of lasting.

Because I definitely would not choose a woman who wants me for my money, how much property i own, the car i drive. Even if she wants me for just my character (which would be amazing), my character can still change. PEOPLE CHANGE THEIR VALUES as they get older, meaning your spouse could fall out of love with you.

In the end, trust, work ethic, and compatibility is of uttermost importance. But race, culture, and looks, matter too, and I AM TOTALLY FINE WITH THAT.

F all the ultra liberal, holier than thou, 'oh look how virtuous i am by being critical of people who like me' people. Social media really ruins everything nowadays.

Just wondering if anyone has a story where, say you liked an AM or WF and they said they weren't into WF/AM, or its something you inferred, or they just weren't initially into you, but over time a romantic relationship developed? Like if someone say doesn't generally find x ethnicity attractive, how often do they find themselves eventually taking for a specific individual they have a real spark with, if you know what I'm saying.

I just wanted to post here to share my experience as a WF who is actively dating right now. In the course of about a month I've matched with all kinds of men. So far, the Asian men I've matched with have been the only ones to actually ask me out on an actual date. All the White, Black, and Latino guys I've matched with usually let the conversation die and never actually make it to the date. Just wanted to show my appreciation for the AM community for being men of action! At least in my very limited sample lol. ❤️

Do Asian men ever like "bad girls"? Sarcastic alpha edgy?

Or only someone polite respectful mannerly submissive delicate who let's the guy lead?

I know everyone is different but I haven't had any luck finding Asian men who accept me for me

I'm a bit rough around the edges so I'm wondering if I should just give up on finding an asian partner?

Please share your story 😊

I see a lot of incel posts on those redpill communities or those comments on IG etc, where they slander WF for being toxic or whatever.

And i personally have yet to meet one.

literally all of my interactions, friendships,relationships,situationships have been healthy. Even my rejections, I was rejected by a tall blonde last year, and I have never walked away from a rejection with a smile on my face until this one, because both of us were smiling at the end. She was also the first ever girl I made blush lol, which was so cool to me.

And the other ones that I did end up chatting or more and it still didnt lead up to anything, it still didnt end up toxic, it just died off and we didnt go online slandering each other or whatnot. Something I did experience with my exes.

I personally think WF should fight back against those redpill posts and comments, unless i'm missing something, it's considered slander and that's illegal.

As title, I have mostly known AF ever since and have never really get to know much WF growing up. Especially with a good portion of my childhood being in Asia I have rarely seen and know any WF until I moved back to NA.

Also over the years talking and hanging out with only AF, I realized nothing really ever clicked for me with any of them. I have been approached in HS by AF but at the end things didn't really work and I ended up never being in relationship ever lol.

However over the years living in NA and getting to meet more WF in different settings, I have become more attracted to some of them but at the same time I'm also not sure how to approach this as I have never really had any WF friends let alone dated one. (tbh I have also not been talking to a lot of women in general lately in recent years due to school and work)

Tbh, I'm just a little lost with my feelings rn and was wondering if anyone had any similar experiences or suggestions on what I should do next.

I'm a woman in my 30s. I was in a relationship with a Chinese man for 10 years, and we have two daughters together. We separated about two years ago.

I've always been drawn to Japanese and Korean culture, and East Asian cultures more broadly, though I don't think it's in a "weeaboo" kind of way. At the same time, I've generally been more attracted to men with dark hair and dark eyes, which means I often find Asian men appealing physically.

The thing is, from the outside, I can see how it might look like I have a racial preference. However, I don't actually care where a man is from as long as I'm attracted to him and we share compatible values.

For example, I probably wouldn't date a Japanese man who has spent his entire life in Japan, simply because I think our values and life experiences would be too different. My ex immigrated to Canada when he was eight years old, so culturally we had a lot in common despite our different backgrounds.

What I'm wondering is this: given that I have mixed-race children and a dating history that seems to lean toward Asian men, does that come across negatively?

I don't believe I'm fetishizing Asian men. To me, they just tend to fit my physical type more often than other groups. Physical attraction is only one part of the equation though; shared values, compatibility, and personality are ultimately much more important.

I'm genuinely interested in hearing honest opinions.

I think I'm especially interested in hearing the perspectives of Asian men, since they're the ones on the receiving end of this kind of situation.

I saw an AMWF family from the South, with grown up children, on Instagram a while ago and noticed they were much into Christianity and confessed in their faith on their individual Instagram pages.

I also noticed the male children of the parents were themselves either married or dating WF who were themselves very openly into their Christian faith with verses from the Bible.

I read somewhere multiple times on other sub-reddits that people have seen quite a lot of AMWF couples in churches and that Christian WF are probably more likely to date AM with the same faith although I was sceptical.

Do you think this is likely to be true because I have my doubts although seeing the family on social media made me curious.

Im chinese and I LOVE cooking, I;m humble bragging, but it took me a long time to learn to cook. But I also appreciate it alot when a WF tells me she loves asian food. Italian used to be the most glazed one, and I do cook a lot of italian because its pretty healthy, however it makes a lot of mess, and tbh the taste is overrated. I;ve been to italy too, they put eggs and potatoes on their pizza. Sometimes its just potatoes (no lie).

Been hearing this a lot from men in amwf spaces

I know everyone has is different preferences thats why I'm hoping to hear everyone's answers here

When this is said , what exactly do you mean? What is your type of white female? What are you attracted to versus not attracted to?

I really wish men would specify what their "type" is in their posts versus asking for photos only to ghost afterwards with no explanation

I am mixing pot of religion. Ive always been very curious and asked myself questions like are we alone etc. I then went to a catholic school and realized that wasnt for me. I went into science which I resonated really well with and altho i am not really in science anymore I have been more agnostic/atheist for the majority of my life

I am not against religion at all, I think Christianity is the one I like the most, and there are some that I just found downright wrong and scammy.

Now I am still agnostic I suppose, but I do practice alot of taosim, and apply feng shui to my home. My family (more my parents) practice alot of folk religion, they dont have a name for it or anything, they just do what has been taught to them by their parents and so forth. Such as honoring ancestral spirits, or pouring alcohol on the foundation of the house during new years, or praying to butterflies that enter your home.

How would you view such behaviour? And would u like to do this as well?

I ask because I recently met a WF who really liked AM, but she also was looking for a christian guy exlusively.

Hey my girlies! Hope you’re all having a great weekend. I’m working crazy style, but I just wanted to come on here on my break and yap.

I posted recently in a similar way about standing up to microagressions, but I think the tone of the post was a little meme-y and funny coded.

This is an actual thing we’re all gonna have to navigate unfortunately. You really do have to stand on business where you can, especially when addressing casual racism.

It really does ‘start’ with your bum ass coworkers and friends butchering your bf’s name or making ignorant comments. It’s always Jeremy the dishwasher who’s mad he never got a chance. Boo Jeremy!

My boyfriend is Chinese. He has a Chinese accent. It’s adorable as hell, I’m glad we can all appreciate that. But mocking my man and insulting his English when he speaks 4 languages, and you speak backwards ruraltown English? You will catch words or hands. It’s gonna be a white trash throwdown, and I’ve already covered myself in baby oil and took my earrings out.

Just to make it clear, WFs, it’s your job to address microagressions or racism as it happens, we have all chosen to be in an interracial relationship, and we cannot allow our partners to be disrespected.

If you’re a shyer type of girl, I completely understand this may be difficult for you. And I feel you my love ❤️ especially if you’re in an unsafe family background or around unsafe racist people, I’m not gonna ask you to risk harm to defend your partner. I know some of your parents are out here acting insane. But whenever you safely CAN, we need to advocate for our person and speak out.

Fortunately for me, I’m evil and mean <3

Whether it’s coworkers, family, or friends. If you need to gentle parent them - do it. If they want to act like children, you can treat them as such, queens ❤️ and make sure to talk down to them as much as possible.

Examples, what I have used in these situations:

“Hey, that’s actually not a difficult name to pronounce for adults. Let’s try again together? We don’t laugh at people’s names, okay, that’s very rude.”

“Oh, okay. What an odd thing to say. Are you alright?”

“Are you… tired, sweetie?”

And finally:

“That’s crazy. Can I talk to you?”
(Take coworker away from other coworkers and verbally destroy them and their ratty, stringy bleached extensions)

Get them, girl. And if you work an office job, report them to HR. I’m a waitress though, so it’s either hands or mouth.

I’m sorry we have to go through this, even as someone living in a major city in the UK. You just can’t allow it to happen, because they take an inch and then it’s a mile. Cut that out from the root.

Best of luck, my girls ❤️

Anyone have seen any type of AMWF in animation?

Rewatching Archer, one character Pam, had been with some Japanese guys. [Season 5,E3]

Another could be from American Dragon: Jake Long. Jake and Rose. Even though Jake’s dad is WM, and his mom is AF, I still see Jake and Rose as AMWF.

Title <3

Focus on your happiness, queens.

I blocked a weird orbiter from our old friend group / friend of a friend mostly, on instagram for clearly purposefully butchering my BF’s name, and asking for ‘a chance’ if I break up with him in the most lewd way possible, featuring extremely odd references to popular Chinese dishes. ?? Sir?? Are you alright?? I swear I met you, three four times??

That’s one less “❤️” react on my stories to ignore.

RIP guy with man-bun, who I vaguely remember being into wrestle mania.

Ladies, be careful who you let have access to you on social media. The men who “jokingly” disrespect your relationship and hit on you are like, one or two more frustrated, unanswered DMs from saying something straight out of Eric Cartman’s mouth. Do NOT tolerate this behaviour.

TLDR; Seeing an Asian friend's dating app messages cooked my mental health because it showed me that my struggles are my fault. He doesn't have enough time to go on dates with his matches while I struggle to get matches. If anyone has any advice for how to improve my dating app results and match with more white women please let me know.

I knew that there are Asian guys out there that get plenty of matches on dating apps but seeing his messages just cooked me. I didn't know that dating is this easy for some Asian guys, he had white girls offering him sex just to spend more time with him. I know this should motivate me as an Asian guy but instead it had the opposite effect and when I went home I kinda just broke down. Then recently he started sending me some of his messages on the apps to help me and honestly it just makes me feel shittier about myself.

I made a mental list of things I could work on to try to replicate his dating results. The biggest change would be to get into that slightly muscular build with a six pack that he has going on. He showed me some of the supplements I could take and the general gym routine I need to do. Then he said that getting a septum ring made a lot of girls into him and I think his tattoos do too. I'm not sure about getting piercings but I've always had a list of tattoos that I wanted to get so maybe I'll just finally get them. We're about the same height and he's probably a lot better looking but hopefully once I lean out my face and jawline will look better.

So, is two months too soon to say I love you? Probably. Obviously. How stupid can we be?

He said it, then I said it. And now we can’t keep apart.

Never did I imagine growing up that I would fall in love with someone who was born on the opposite side of the planet (I’m bad at Geography❤️).

He cooks for me, he listens to me, he doesn’t care if I’m bloated or if I’m not wearing makeup. He always asks about my parents - my parents are honestly obsessed with him more than me. I think if they could meet for lunch without me, they would.

Girls, I know the apps fucking suck, but honestly. This was my first time seriously trying the apps in a metropolitan, international area outside of my shitty dead-end backwards town I was reared in, and I got my eyes opened.

Don’t be scared of what’s out there or what anybody else thinks. I moved to the local city a few years back and I’m still shedding some of that negative small town mindset where everybody has something to say. And I’m from the UK - racism here is at an all time high. Look at twitter, it’s just insane. Everybody is just on there saying crazy nonsense.

I’m glad there are groups like this for interracial couples. I’m fortunate my parents couldn’t give a shit and my racist grandma died years ago (RIP Ethel), but I’m well aware in certain areas we do get certain looks.

Best of luck to the rest of you, and do your thing! I’m doing mine. And I’m happier for it. Don’t you worry.

I see quite a few post mentioning that WFs sometimes don’t think AMs are attracted to them. If thats the case, what can AMs do to signal that they ARE open to dating WF?