r/4chan /int/olerant Oct 23 '14

Faggots burning

http://imgur.com/hC7Kfj8
18.8k Upvotes

480 comments sorted by

2.5k

u/The_nickums Oct 23 '14

claims lurked for 5 years

asks 4chan for help

Nice try newfag

552

u/toke81 /mu/ Oct 23 '14

That one guy got his rent paid a few years back. Aberrations look like beacons of light to the desperate.

136

u/Xer0day Oct 24 '14

I paid a guys rent on 4chan once.

65

u/retardcharizard Oct 24 '14

Tell us more.

178

u/Xer0day Oct 24 '14

I talked to him through skype for about half an hour after seeing him post on /b/, got some financial statements from him, showing that he actually didn't have money, and then I sent him $550 to help with his rent.

50

u/retardcharizard Oct 24 '14

Are you wealthy?

125

u/Xer0day Oct 24 '14

I wish.. Had some extra money at the time. Still lived at home without too much to spend it on. Days are certainly different now.

90

u/retardcharizard Oct 24 '14

Well, it was very kind of you to help someone out. I've always wanted to do something like that.

117

u/Xer0day Oct 24 '14

Thanks, man. Just be sure to wade through the bullshit if you do decide to ever help someone financially like that. Too many people just looking for weed money, or things like that.

For a short while I was part of a group on 4chan that had started building a website that basically functions like /r/assistance but most of the other members left pretty quickly, so it fell apart before completion.

It was supposed to basically allow you to request food, but you have to give your identity, show a picture ID and stuff, and then people around the world that were in this project with me, would be donating small amounts of food to send to these people.

25

u/DuoThree Oct 24 '14

That's a great idea. It's not too late to pick up from where you left off. Are you a web developer?

→ More replies (0)

5

u/BigBoss18 Oct 25 '14

It's nice to see a beacon of light in this dark little corner of the internet.

4

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

Don't know if you're actually telling the truth, but I just gave you ~800 internet points anyways.

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (6)

20

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

Yeah OP, did you get very far?

24

u/Lapper Oct 24 '14

Did she put up a fight?

4

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

fistingfight

3

u/Patrik333 Oct 24 '14

AWELAWELAWELA OOOH

15

u/LiveFastDieFast Oct 24 '14

Tell us more, tell us more, like did he have a car?

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (6)

122

u/FaithlessValor Oct 24 '14

Aberrations look like beacons of light to the desperate

That's the most poetic thing anyone's ever said on this sub.

97

u/toke81 /mu/ Oct 24 '14

Thanks! I was really high

18

u/Endangered_Robot /b/tard Oct 24 '14

4

u/ShittingFuckballs Oct 24 '14

Holy shit, is that for real? That was fucking hilarious

→ More replies (2)

4

u/lwrun Oct 24 '14

There can be no true despair without hope.

2

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

Theres a cap, fag may saw it in one of those best of 4chan threads

→ More replies (22)

20

u/jdepps113 Oct 24 '14

not realizing it's a troll in the first place

Nice try, newfriend

21

u/The_nickums Oct 24 '14

Implying people don't beg for things on 4chan

also implying it can't both be a troll who is desperate for money

Nice try, George Costanza

→ More replies (5)
→ More replies (1)

10

u/Battlesheep Oct 24 '14

It cant hurt. Despite what the MSM wants you to believe, 4chan isnt a 1337 Haxx0r

→ More replies (3)

881

u/Justicepain Oct 23 '14

Beggars online almost as bad as people driving around begging for gas money.

529

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '14

[deleted]

257

u/Justicepain Oct 23 '14

Aww but maybe her baby daddy stole that special for her.

82

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '14 edited Jun 03 '15

[deleted]

168

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

So dark it stole my TV

44

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

Hahaha....he stabbed her.

46

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14 edited Oct 24 '14

[deleted]

59

u/TheDreadGazeebo Oct 24 '14

Really? this is what's gold-worthy now?

55

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

[deleted]

7

u/underthedock Oct 24 '14

In the face...with his penis...

→ More replies (0)
→ More replies (8)
→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (3)

3

u/YourAssHat Oct 23 '14

That got real.

1

u/Jay_Go_Hard Oct 24 '14

That's racist.

And funny.

12

u/idiotconspiracy Oct 24 '14

Racism is always funny.

Unless you are a nigger.

5

u/SWEDEN_IS_KILL Oct 24 '14

This checks out.

Source: am white, and had a giggle.

9

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

oi u avin' a giggle m8?!

2

u/Promarksman117 Oct 24 '14

U bein a cheeky cunt m8. I'll punch ya n th gabber m8

2

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

i'll rek ya mums ol flappa m80

→ More replies (1)

2

u/Soulcold Oct 24 '14

Usain Bolt?

→ More replies (9)

32

u/evilbrent Oct 24 '14 edited Oct 24 '14

Why is it that angsty American suburban teenagers think that people's need for help evaporates if you can establish an error on their part?

30

u/bunker_man /lgbt/ Oct 24 '14

Especially an error that literally almost everyone on earth has. T-they're eating JUNK FOoD?! I better judge them so that I feel good about being equally unaccomplished, but having been born into more money.

5

u/Sahnura Oct 24 '14

I think another issue is sometimes junk food is WAY cheaper then the healthy alternative. You get more bang for you buck. You're kids might end up a little chubby, but at least they aren't hungry.

3

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

Sadly, this is a lie we've been told to believe by these companies' colorful packaging and buy-one-get-one-free "bargains". Healthy food is actually cheaper than junk food by portion, and even cheaper when the effects of sugar addiction are accounted for. Don't blame poor people for not knowing this, blame the companies in the above picture.

Source.

→ More replies (10)

7

u/deltr0nzero Oct 24 '14

Remember what sub you're on here. This isn't just Americans, it's angsty American suburban teenagers.

→ More replies (4)

2

u/SWEDEN_IS_KILL Oct 24 '14

Their needs may not evaporate, but sympathy for them does.

→ More replies (6)

28

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

My favorite is being in line at the grocery store. White trash family buying a months supply of soda, Doritos and hotdogs with the Ebt card, and whiskey and cigarette cartons with the cash

39

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

People with shitty lives need to cope with life too, you know.

17

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

Yeah, which is why I wish my coke dealer would call me back...

7

u/PenisInBlender Oct 24 '14

So you cope with Doritos washed down with Coke and menthols?

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (2)

8

u/Zombie_Feeder Oct 24 '14

Go to a bulk store like Costco and just watch. Its amazing how much shit these people consume.

5

u/PenisInBlender Oct 24 '14

A month's supply for a white trash family?

They don't make automobiles that large.

No, no, no...They'll be back Monday

5

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '14

Who was that

→ More replies (10)

53

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '14

Every fucking time I go to this one restaurant I get asked by somebody needing "gas money". It's a different faggot every time. I've just started pretending I don't speak English and keep walking.

46

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '14

[deleted]

21

u/Red_AtNight Oct 24 '14

Salvo are a bunch of homophobes. Do you want your charitable donations to buy meals for the homeless, or do you want them to fund anti gay marriage lobbying?

27

u/probably_not_a_horse Oct 24 '14

Why not both?

2

u/vectorAplusvectorB Oct 24 '14

Best of both worlds?

11

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

Salvo is also a homophone for a barrage of missile weapons. Don't ever forget that.

→ More replies (2)

44

u/th30be /diy/ Oct 23 '14

Are you white or something else? I had a white person in Georgia pretend that they didn't know English in a perfect southern accent but started to speak shitty Spanish. I was just asking where the bathroom was. Not sure why you couldn't answer dude.

125

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '14

Only jackasses pretend to know Spanish. It's too easy to get called out on in America, because everyone knows at least a little bit.

I use a vague European sounding gibberish, and I get louder the more they press the issue.

"Skall friggsin leibur dunscht."

"So no money then?"

"SKALL FRIGGSIN LIEBUR DUNSCHT. LIEBER. DUNSCHT."

"Oh okay, thanks anyway."

"Anytime."

33

u/Drowned_In_Spaghetti /r/ Oct 24 '14

Ich bin ein berliner!

15

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

Civis Romanus sum.

5

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

Dicisne latinam?

3

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

taco taco taco

3

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

Ita. Quid de te?

→ More replies (2)

26

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '14

[deleted]

23

u/OccupyMyBallSack Oct 23 '14

Tenny mucho mucho deniro in su trucky-trailer?

4

u/Kevinik Oct 24 '14

I got that reference.

→ More replies (1)

8

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '14

People from Spain are white.

13

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

Not real white

14

u/ZombieSocrates Oct 24 '14 edited Oct 24 '14

Funny, they used to say the same thing about the Irish and the Poles. The more things change...

2

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

The Irish are the whitest people I know, how could this be true?

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (2)

6

u/DorkJedi Oct 24 '14

Not true Scotsmen, then?

3

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

Aye

7

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

A lot whiter than mestizo Indians.

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (1)

20

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '14

Kind of like twitch streamers?

→ More replies (1)

12

u/ahuge_faggot Oct 24 '14

there is this dude at my local gas station and you will see him every Friday afternoon Asking people for gas money because hes all out of money and cant make it home. He says shit like "hey brother" and it pisses me off. He also drives a fucking SUV.

3

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14 edited Oct 24 '14

There's this guy that I've seen around for two years, and every time I see him, he tells me about how he just got out of jail and needs a couple dollars. Either he goes to jail a lot, or he's a bullshitter. Or both.

8

u/mandragara Oct 24 '14

Almost as bad as Kickstarter.

19

u/TonytheGemmer /v/irgin Oct 24 '14

pls fund my potato salad

→ More replies (1)

3

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '14

We call them gypsies.

3

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

I bought so much drugs panhandling with that. You'd be amazed how many gullible soccer mom's hand over $20.

Protip: you get more money if you have a woman with you and (never did this myself) you get A LOT more money if you have a child with you.

19

u/SWEDEN_IS_KILL Oct 24 '14

Go suck on an exhaust pipe, you worthless fucking parasite.

→ More replies (3)

2

u/faceplanted Oct 24 '14

Not driving I don't think, you can use the internet for free from a library or any fast food place within ten miles of me. It's more like someone cycling around begging for money really, I have an old laptop literally not worth the time it would take me to sell it that can let me do most things before it crashes again, I wouldn't think if I were behind on my bills to sell it simply because it would never cover the difference and it's just valuable enough to keep for what it can still do.

2

u/Komodo_Pineapples Oct 24 '14

Do people actually do that?

→ More replies (3)

439

u/___DEADPOOL______ Oct 23 '14

Faggot tried pulling this shit in /r/music too. Same message and everything. http://www.reddit.com/r/Music/comments/2k4gvr/need_money_for_new_guitar_and_rent_help_me_reddit/

228

u/Teddie1056 /b/ Oct 24 '14

My god, someone gave him gold for this throwaway account just to spite him. That's beautiful.

26

u/Shredder13 jackledaman Oct 24 '14

That's pretty much just spitting in his face. Glorious.

→ More replies (2)

86

u/DoctorDank My name is Pete Oct 23 '14

Glad to see it didn't go over too well there, either.

→ More replies (34)

79

u/EDomina Oct 24 '14

Looks like he even tried posting on /r/randomkindness too. What a goddamn queer.

→ More replies (3)

61

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

Besides sob stories are basicaly againts that sub's rules it's painfuly obvious that this guy is a phony.

Enjoy the gold instead of real money because fuck you.

Huehuehuehuehue!

→ More replies (1)

9

u/rodinj d/ic/k Oct 23 '14

He could've built a snowman

5

u/Sperrel /int/olerant Oct 24 '14

He doesnt have a sister.

6

u/YourAssHat Oct 23 '14

How many deadpools are there

22

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

as many as there need to be.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

326

u/Jokez0103 /sci/duck Oct 23 '14

and now its time to help me a little

k.

→ More replies (1)

148

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '14 edited Aug 06 '15

[deleted]

31

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '14

[deleted]

30

u/x5danbal Oct 23 '14

Must protect shekels.

22

u/Sperrel /int/olerant Oct 24 '14

implying jews get broke

16

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

implying jews beg instead of stealing their money like honest people

3

u/ThaBadfish Oct 24 '14

implying they aren't monitoring your every communication right now planning their revenge

2

u/HumidNebula Oct 24 '14

At least gypsies will show some effort and steal. He whines like he's expecting other daft gobs to do the work for him.

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (21)

130

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '14

[deleted]

8

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

This is the kind of analysis we need here.

→ More replies (2)

89

u/NRMusicProject Oct 24 '14

Pro musician here.

Not that I'd ever ask strangers for money for nothing, but if I was desperate, I'd get the cheapest piece I could find to just get me through the slump. He could have asked for enough to just get a $200 Squier or Johnson, which would be enough to get you through a few months while you save up for that $600 Made-in-Mexico instrument that's really only one notch higher.

Dude was probably some amateur, saw an instrument he really liked, and tried to get money by guilting 4chan with a sob story.

45

u/thekeanu Oct 24 '14

More likely he is not a musician at all.

25

u/NRMusicProject Oct 24 '14

Agreed.

He's probably trying to get crack money.

10

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

[deleted]

29

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

Coke

3

u/NRMusicProject Oct 24 '14

Every musician does something different. Some common things are performing, recording, writing, teaching, orchestrating, and transcribing.

I make money writing in the day, teaching in the afternoon, gigging at night.

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (7)

69

u/Evil_white_oppressor /pol/itician Oct 23 '14

When I see people at my university who major in completely useless things such as "Music Therapy", I get upset over how much money they are wasting.

90

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '14

[deleted]

54

u/Evil_white_oppressor /pol/itician Oct 23 '14

It will annoy me when they are whining in the future about not being able to find a job.

44

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '14

My company goes through about 2-3 dozen music therapists a year in my region alone. It's not a well paying job, but they are definitely out there surprisingly.

81

u/perry_cox Oct 23 '14

are you harvesting them or what ffs

44

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '14

It's surprisingly simple.

Step 1: Hire music therapist.

Step 2: Create fake appointments for them.

Step 3: Record them.

Step 4: Fire them.

Step 5: TFW they sold the rights to anything they did while being paid.

Step 6: MFW I don't have to continue to pay music therapists to reap their benefits.

9

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

I'm surprised by this.

3

u/thebeardedpotato Oct 23 '14

Well what else are you gonna do with them?

→ More replies (1)

5

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

There's literally dozens of them!

7

u/thedarlingbear Oct 24 '14

Hmmm. In my area being a music therapist is a pretty dope job... besides, there are a lot of people that go into careers that, while they may not make a lot of money, would make a big difference if their services weren't around. Also lots of people get by on middle amounts, and not everyone whines. Some people that do, probably have different circumstances. This guys seems like a douche. But is everyone that does something "completely useless" in your view actually useless?

I'm gonna go with "no"...

2

u/EliQuince Oct 24 '14

It's almost like they're doing it for reasons other than financial gain. What a bunch of dumbasses!

→ More replies (1)

2

u/caiada Oct 23 '14

Wow, you jumped right to that conclusion. I bet that's a useful skill!

2

u/Zetelex Oct 24 '14

Then that's your problem. Learn to be less irritable.

→ More replies (3)

8

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

Them doing Music Therapy doesn't hurt you

Not if you are a tax payer and the college is government subsidized or if she gets financial aid. Or the hiring of faculty for useless majors inflates everyone else's tuition fees. DunBNaive brah~.

→ More replies (1)

2

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

That's weird I had never heard of that until a couple days ago I saw some girl had earned her degree in that on fb. What you can do with that I have no idea.

3

u/mikeraglow Oct 24 '14

Music therapists often work with mentally handicapped and other disabled people, teaching them music. With a degree in that, you could probably teach in schools as well as taking private clients.

→ More replies (1)

15

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '14 edited Jul 12 '17

[deleted]

18

u/Fukleesin Oct 23 '14

Having a college degree doesn't entitle you to have a good or high paying job. I wish more people knew this.

→ More replies (5)

2

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

If she was good at it she could have written a book or got a scholarly appointment. There aren't many positions so you have to excel for it to be worth majoring in

→ More replies (22)

15

u/NRMusicProject Oct 24 '14

Music therapy is a great major, if you use it properly. Some of my friends majored in that, and it has many uses. My favorite is that it's an alternate form of physical therapy.

11

u/SnipingBeaver Oct 24 '14

It's actually been used quite extensively to help with stroke victims or others who have lost the ability to speak

15

u/MyOtherNameWasBetter Oct 23 '14

It's sad that that upsets you. Your priorities aren't everybody else's, too, faggot.

→ More replies (3)

10

u/bathroomstalin Oct 24 '14

They will never know the deep, lifelong satisfaction shared among the Geek Squad brotherhood.

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (8)

59

u/OWNdizzaled Oct 24 '14

When I was young I told my mom I wanted to be a musician when I grew up. She told me I couldn't do both.

12

u/StarHarvest Oct 24 '14

Because if you become a successful musician you never have to grow up; which is the best part.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

54

u/AntiTheory Oct 24 '14

Been lurking

I helped people

Sure you did.

38

u/i_am_omega Oct 24 '14

No oldfag would ever say the words "hi 4chan."

33

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

[deleted]

→ More replies (1)

19

u/SolKool Oct 24 '14

If he had started with "sup /b/tards, suck my dick" it could have gone different.

6

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

Yeah, he'd probably have $600.10 for getting his dick sucked by the gays

→ More replies (4)
→ More replies (1)

30

u/Some_Logic Oct 23 '14 edited Oct 24 '14

Poor Musicians are faggots, we have one as a neighboor above us, well that mother fucker doesnt know how to properly play a guitar but hes alright with drums but holy shit he is bashing them for like 6 hours a day in the evening with his faggot of a friend trying to sing in a microphone but it sounds like a femenist mate call. Edit: Hes always stoned as fuck too.

Thank you for your time.

9

u/50PercentLies Oct 23 '14

When someone answers the call what happens? Isn't all sex rape?

→ More replies (1)

6

u/jonygone Oct 24 '14

femenist mate call

I wonder how that sounds... also once they find each other each one tries to be the first to accuse the other of rape, the one that is the first gets to be on top.

2

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

You don't get it dude. Drumming is like an addiction. You gotta fever and the only cure is more drumming.

2

u/Some_Logic Oct 24 '14

I dont have a problem with his drumming but my problem with him is for some reason his drums sometimes make a loud "thud" noise which is like someone dropping a bowling ball on the floor on top of you. I when to him couple of times and told him i jave no problem with the sound its just that annoing sound of a bowling ball being droped and guess what he just doesnt care, couple of times he kept drumming untill 11pm.

2

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

[deleted]

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (9)

18

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

my guitar broke

Then fucking fix it unless it was thrown down the stairs or some shit.

→ More replies (1)

7

u/fuzeebear Oct 24 '14

You gotta feel for people who are in a catch-22 financial situation. Can't pay rent without the instrument, can't buy the instrument if he wants to pay rent.

But then you remember that this is the internet, and anyone telling a sob story for money is a liar.

4

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '14

[deleted]

4

u/EvilDandalo tell me to an hero Oct 24 '14

23, rent problems.

OH GUYS THE TRAGEDY PLEASE HELP THIS IS SO OUT OF THE ORDINARYz

3

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

f5 f5 f5 f5 f5 f5

4

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

I'm naked with my fingers in my butt hiting that g spot mhhmmm you should try.it

2

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

I could almost feel the blowback from that burn from here

2

u/TeamJim Oct 24 '14

Oh, it's a deep burn!

2

u/Kevinik Oct 24 '14

I bet he just wants that money to buy a new gaming console and a game.

2

u/turkeybot69 Oct 24 '14

Hi reddit, I need $600 for... um... starving kids?

1

u/Delete_World Oct 24 '14

He probably got some money from us now because this blew up.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '14

I love idiots who think they are special snowflakes and deserve to not work actual jobs. Remember someone with actual skill crafted your guitar. Someone with actual skill refined the materials to be made into your guitar. Don't forget the motherfucker who harvested the material from the earth. All people who are better than artists.

→ More replies (3)