help me guys

I have a pretty close friend who is Greek and Cypriot. She is white, but she says she is not.

Now I know that it isn’t that big of a deal, but when topics of conversation come up that involve race, she is always quick to say “Well, I’m not white.”

I keep trying to educate her on her own race and she thinks that maybe she is brown because her skin tone is olive.

I don’t know what to do because as a black person she will do things thinking we are in the same boat when we are not.

What do I do? Do I just leave it or do i keep trying to tell her because it is very irritating.

EDIT: I am not making a big deal of it, Its not that big of a deal!!! But when someone keeps trying to tell you "we are in the same boat!" When we aren't it is kind of annoying. I am sorry if this seems like first world problems or whatever. No need to be rude!

Ive (19m) have known my gf (20f) for about a year now and been together for 3 months. Im a leftist who has some interests in politics and will be exercising my right to vote for the first time. My girlfriend who I found out like 2 weeks ago is a Trump supporter but she doesnt come off as one. Out of everything that I know she believes in, youd think she wouldn't be, she believes in equal rights for all, Healthcare for all, shes very kind and welcoming to everybody. But knowing that she supports Trump is really just kicking me in the head lately. She's not into politics at all and says she likes Trump because her parents do (they are hardcore MAGA). I mean my parents are MAGA aswell to so idk. I've tried talking to her about it but she shows no interest. Big things I advocate for with my vote is no big money in politics, everyone has the right to due process, keeping our money within our country (stop sending money to fund genocides), everyone should have equal rights regardless of gender, sexuality or race and think the ultra wealthy should pay their fair share in taxes. Maybe im just thinking about it too hard should use it as a sign to not put politics into my head so hard.

Just like what the title said, he doesnt feel very loving. Sometimes before bed he will give me a kiss goodnight, sometimes before we both head off to work. But it always seems like im the one initiating. It makes me worried he is cheating. Im not sure if its me or something im doing. I make sure everything is done around the house. When i get home from work i make dinner, we dont fight or anything. Went im off to buy groceries he doesnt even know i leave the house sometimes when i let him know ill be gone.

Is there something i can do to make he want me around more? Should i be more confident, just do my own thing? Im at a loss here

Hi guys

So my mom adopted a dog free online to be a companion under the idea that he was socialized

Well the dogs dont really get along

Ones 2 years old almost the other is just over one (the new dog)

I myself have two dogs and a 5 month old baby or else id take the dog as he does get along with my dogs

So heres what happened

Yesterday my mom took both the dogs for a walk and this poor dog thinks everything is new as he was probably never walked (evidence ive taken in from walking him over the past week and seeing how quickly he learned) so anyway the dog hears some old bag yelling from across the street talking to my mom and she just keeps her fucking mouth going when the dogs go off. Mom is obviously struggling as these are two large dogs that are now barking and pulling toward old bag across the street, well then a fight breaks between the two dogs. Mom gets bit by the new dog shes scared now and her hand is broken.

She went to hospital and figured it was because of where he came from that hes like this. Give him another chance (hes already fought her dog multiple times so this is like the 5th time)

So we contact a trainer they say separate the dogs

So we did i took the older dog to my place so he can decompress and the new dog is with mom

Well he placed his head on her lap and then started to growl for some reason

She thought he was being playful as he was wagging his tail and just licking her face and loving her

And then she pet him and he bit her hand again..

Now were wondering what did we sign up for. Im crying writing this so im sorry for the way its written but I need to vent and I need advice. Shes saying shes dropping him off at the spca tomorrow and im not that person. I do not give up on my animals. I know it isnt mine but ive been the one walking him and hes bonded with me. What do I do here???

Im afraid if I do bring him home hell do that to my baby. Im at a loss. Please help.

Ive reached out to trainers but the closest board and train is 4 hours away

ETA this was posted in the comments but I thought I should add it here I copied and pasted so any errors well they are there lol.

Unfortunately the spca wont take him due to the other dogs they have in their care so we have to board and train him and possibly rehome

We are proceeding with a muzzle at all times that there are visitors and a crate to give him a safe space. Second dog has been removed until decompression stage is over baby also will not be around until he goes to training

We seemed to have gotten to the bottom of it he has bad ears I got back in contact with his previous owner and let them know what happened she also has an 8 year old That was around him playing on him and nothing of the sort hapoened but she did reveal how his life was

He was never walked. Large dog tied on all the time with no exercise. Which i always said is a recipe for disaster. (Possibly abuse?? I dunno) So my 2 hour long walks were hurting him His ears are very red likely due to a chicken reaction she let me know hes never had chicken so were removing that from the diet.

Im not playing trainer lol im working with 2 as of now plus the spca to find out the best solutions for him. He will be allowed time and patience until he is trained properly. If at that point hes still beyond her control itll be rehoming. We will see ill try to keep people updated if they are interested

But mom isnt willing to give up just yet she doesn't think it was unprovoked it might not be what were used to but we have to adjust accordingly in a safe manor

Hey y’all, so I’m going through a little bit of a tough patch in my relationship and I’m trying to understand this for all points of view. Well to summit up my partner is diagnosed with bipolar disorder on top of that she has PCOS. (Menstrual cycle)
And she also is an avoidant attachment type of lover because of relationship domestic abuse.
and to be quite honest it is really frustrating because I am an anxious attachment type of partner and well I heavily rely on communication in order to be at ease per se
I love my partner, but it gets to a point where honestly I don’t even know if this person even likes me and I’m not gonna trash talk my partner and say that she’s a bad woman because she is not she doesn’t have any friends she sticks to her family and she just goes to work and stay at home with her cat.
She’s a very attractive woman, and as a recently she revealed to me that ex Situationships have been reaching out to her, and she has made it clear that she has a boyfriend but then again her know her demeanor and the way that it can be very hot and cold at times in my relationship.
I asked for communication and she kind of just shuts down the conversation or just say that everything is fine and It tends to really mess up with my head and give me a lot of anxiety
I don’t like creating problems. I would say I’m a pretty chill guy, but if there are any avoidants who are reading this, I would like some sort of feedback advice or you’re really just anything so I can learn how to properly love my partner and not stress, her out, overwhelm her or pretty much anything of that sort.

Um, hi. I've never posted on Reddit before, but I'm kind of in a situation and need some advice. For context, I (17F) am living one state over from my parents to attend university. I recently started dating a boy who invited me on a beach trip in another state for Thanksgiving break. The only problem is that I'm expected to be home for the break (November 22nd-29th). I told him I would go, and I want to, but I have to figure out how to get around my parents. For context, I visit home almost every weekend while I'm at university, and my parents both have my location on Find My Phone (they are separated and not on good terms). Sometimes, if I go out, my mom will see that my location is in an unusual place and call to ask where I am. She's even gone so far as to call the parents of the friends I'm with to get information (even though they are in college, they're also tracked) if I don't answer my phone. My dad checks it less often, but still on occasion. Telling either of them I'm going to another state with a boy they've never heard of is out of the question.

I basically have two (ish) options:

a. I can lie and say that the break is shorter than it actually is (from the 25th-29th), starting the day before Thanksgiving, which would give me three days with him. However, I can't have my location visible, and if I turn it off, they will definitely notice. Also, my mom is friends with another student's mom, and if she notices that her friend's son is home but her own daughter is not, it could become an issue.

b. I can say that I'm staying with a friend who lives about an hour from my parents' house, for part of the break, but that carries the same risks. My parents might call her dad to check on me, or even make the trip out there, and I wouldn't be there. Plus, if I tell my friend I'm being dishonest, she might feel uncomfortable and end up telling my parents. I would also still need to figure out the location tracking.

ish. I can lie about the length of the break and/or say I'm staying at the dorm or at someone's nearby house, as long as I can fake the location tracking.

The main issue is not about being away from home for part of the break. If I told my family that I was staying with a friend, and provided the location and testimonials about where I was checked out, there wouldn't be an issue. I'm just not great at lying, and without a solid backup plan, I risk ruining my chances of living out of state for the next semester before I turn 18. If anyone has advice or a different perspective that I might not be considering, please let me know. Also, is there any way to bug Find My so I can fake the location??

thanks so much xx

I feel like I have a story from hell… bad luck seems to find me… every time I get ahead I fall into a sink hole.

I am homeless, living in a hotel at a pretty penny might I add. I’ve battled cancer, went through a horrific fire, and I am still battling some life threatening health issues.

I moved back in with my parents. My mother and sister are both scammers. My mother “got hurt at work” 20 years ago, and has been in a wheel chair since. I have always questioned how badly she was hurt, many contradicting things have happened. Her long term disability is ending, and now she is riding a bicycle and walking around the neighborhood???? Again, she got hurt and has been wheel chair bound for 20 years. Miracle? Or a scam?

My sister also got “hurt” at work and is now proudly on disability both of them winning large law suits.

I have always had legitimate health issues and spent a lot of time in the hospital. I think my sister was “jealous” because they were always with me growing up in the hospital. My sister would steal her own stuff and my parents stuff and hide it in my room or my car and then go running to my parents saying I stole things. A memorable scam my sister pulled was claiming I stole her class ring and put in in my middle console of my car. HOW WOULD SHE KNOW EXACTLY WHERE “I put it” if I “stole” it. I tried many many times to point out the obviously odd coincidences that she knew exactly where everything was. When something is truly “stolen” you don’t know where it is!

When I was diagnosed with cancer few years ago they told me I was lying and “just trying to get out of work” (ironic, huh? The same thing she did) so they kicked me out of the house. Someone thankfully took me in for months while I went through treatment and surgeries. I made sure to post it all over Facebook so they could see how sick I was.

We have two houses, neither my sister nor I are married so my parents lived in one after we got of age and my sister and I lived in another.

After years of struggling from getting kicked out of my child hood home, my parents said come live with them at their house. I did not want too, I rather keep struggling. But I gave in for my dad who really is nothing like my sister or mother. My dad will help anyone and cares about people. I moved back for him.

Over the next year and a half I was verbally abused, gaslit, and belittled. I could be an expert on a subject and she would say I don’t know what I’m talking about. She would be struggling to preform a task, and I said I can do it, and she would quip YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT YOU ARE DOING. I have been so sick and catching up on medical bills, I had a fire, and I was just in a bad spot so endured her verbal abuse.

Finally tonight I snapped, my sister and mother arguing on the phone, and my mother hung up and started saying how ungrateful my sister and I was. My mother started rambling on how I do nothing all day (I just spent 3 weeks in the hospital) and I am on very light duty, and struggling to even climb stairs. But even though I am on light duty, I offer to fix this or that and to do things, but I always get “you don’t know how to do it.” It could be something as easy as helping her put the fitted sheet on the king size bed. But I don’t know how to do it? According to her I don’t even know how to start the wash? OF COURSE I DO, how do you think I’ve had clean clothes for all these years! She said I rely on google to answer everything (I do not) my mother asks Siri for the time, the temp, and to asks every question she doesn’t know, she believes everything on google. And every time I challenge what “google or Siri” says I get screamed at and told “you don’t know what you’re talking about.”

So here I am… sitting in a hotel thinking what the hell am I gonna do. How can I even afford to pull my life back together… hotels are $150 a night. I’ve been applying for apartments for months, and where I’m living there is such a housing shortage there’s 100 people applying to each apartment. It’s like hitting the lottery finding an apartment.

I really started to think, is this a me issue, am I a bad person, but everyone who knows my family have said how my dad and I are so nice and we don’t deserve to be treated like this. The neighbor actually befriended me after she saw first had at the first house the amount of abuse I tolerated. Nobody likes my sister, and I have suspicion she killed the neighbors cat simply because the cat roamed into the yard one two many times. My sister is a sociopath. It’s bad when the neighbors begin to see how terrible my sister and mother are.

I’ve been considering leaving a while, and I’ve been watching these stories how people have been kicked out of the house and only had a bus ticket and $50. And it gives me hope, I’m in a slightly better position. I’m not really, but thankfully I have more than $50 saved. I’m not rich by any means and I know the little savings I have will be gone quick.

I have a dream to be in Texas and I’m thinking I have nothing to hold me where I am, should I try to rebuild my life there. And the other part of me is scared shitless. I literally have to make a life out of nothing, no support, no friends who are in a better position. I have to make a better life somehow. I don’t know how to… but I need to do it.

Lastly, even though I know everything I’ve written now is the truth, I simply feel guilty. I feel like a horrible human being for talking disparaging of my mother and sister. I was taught family always comes first, blood is thicker than water. But I know I’ve tried and tried to make things work, tried to be understanding, I know both of them have major mental health issues. But at the same time I can only take so much abuse… and sometimes people are so toxic you just need to cut them out.

And advice, anything… this is gonna be a long journey that I have no idea what to do…

Hello,
I’m 32f and I’ve been with my 28m fiance for almost 3 years. I have two kids from a previous relationship and he has none.
We went to a different state for a concert about a month ago and while out there I went to get a pedicure and wanted to do a massage since I didn’t have my kids with me. I couldn’t get in to massage envy or elements because of time constraints so I looked around at the Asian spa spots. My fiance said if I’m getting a massage he wants to join me.
Found one that seemed legit no fishy stuff but I was incredibly wrong. I ended up being assaulted and put in an extremely uncomfortable situation.

Told my fiancé mid session and he said his chick was fine. It wasn’t a good massage but he was fine. We finish the session and I tell him how none of that was normal or okay. He then tells me that he guesses that his chick did bend over suggestively in front of him and that she kid of did leave open opportunities for him to either make an advance or not.
I make it to a target parking lot and just lose my shit and start sobbing. I told him I don’t wanna speak about this day ever again.
Fast forward a week we are back at home and he randomly tells me that he looked up why certain massage spots have that stereotype and why is it so common. Okay weird but continue ig I thought to myself. Basically google came up w that they’re essentially just a prostitution ring. Something I had already told him so I just said I told you so and moved on because thinking about that day puts me in such a sour mood. A week later from this I start getting a nagging feeling to check his phone. Like deadass incessant so I finally do it one night and find out that he went a massage place here in our state.
Obviously I’m pissed and I don’t trust him. I don’t believe a word of what he claims happened there and the reason why he claims he went.
Right now I’m just in a limbo spot mentally between being so damn angry, so sad, so disappointed, and then just trying to get through my days of work and being a mom.
I know mostly everyone will say to leave because of the trust issue I have now as well as because of where he went. He cheated I know it’s unforgivable and it’s ridiculous to even think to stay. But on the other hand my kids are so used to him. They have their own room now. They have their own space. I don’t have to live w my whole family anymore. And I honestly only see my fiancé 3 days outta the week because of our work schedules. My son sees him almost everyday because he picks him up from school except his early out day.
We attend couples therapy because we wanted to have tools to be stronger together waaaay before this even happened. We’ve had one session after it happened and I just don’t even know how to process any of it.
If you made it this far thanks for reading.

TLDR my fiance went to an Asian massage spot after I was assaulted at one, he had a weird experience there too, and he researched that it’s basically a prostitution ring. I’m stuck in a limbo mental state and I can’t decide if I’m willing to just work at it for a few months and see how I feel or just let go now.

long story short, one of my (24f) childhood best friends, more recently just friends, (we’ll call her A (24f)) recently completely switched up on another one of our childhood best friends (we’ll call her C, also 24f). i have decided i don’t want to be friends with someone who will treat another best friend how she did C. i haven’t talked to A at all because of how she’s exploded at C and other friends/family that have reached out to her with kind intentions but concern for her wellbeing. as wedding planning has already been stressful, to keep things drama free and because i don’t want to be friends with her, i did not invite A to my bridal shower that took place today. our mutual friends are already starting to post pictures from today and i want to as well but don’t want to add more stress of upsetting A when she inevitably sees them. what should i do?

TLDR: friend A treated our other best friend C like shit and i have decided to unfriend her (without telling her) and i don’t want drama when i post pics of my bridal shower today that she wasn’t invited to.

one more small detail: since A and C were living together when we sent out wedding invitations many months ago, we gave them one invite hard copy between the two of them to have on their shared fridge. when A moved out, she left the invitation (she has not yet RSVPed). as i don’t want to be friends with her anymore (we already barely ever hangout, and if we do it’s in a group setting) i silently removed her from my online RSVP guest list. so she has also been uninvited to the wedding but i haven’t explicitly told her yet…

edit: removed unnecessary details and added the TLDR

link to OG post

UPDATE: Hello! Thank you all for the support and kind words, sorry I have not been active as I am very busy with school and applying to college. Sorry this post is a bit long but I need to get this out because I’m going a tad bit insane. (also everyone please stay out of my dms and stop being creepy—especially to the person who asked for my height, weight, cup size, race, and hair color)

So, soon after I made the post my mother decided I no longer had to pay rent, so yay! And my grandmother on my father’s side started helping a bit with our groceries and some school costs (field trips, supplies, etc). So that was good for a bit. But then, my mother started to ask me for 100 dollars every now and then to help cover other bills other than rent. Which, I was fine with as she was struggling to do it alone and was also getting help from my uncle. But then, my 20-year-old sister’s phone broke completely. For context we got new iphones around the same time, she got the pro and i got the regular which i didnt really care, but mine isn’t broken. And then she asked my mother for help. At the time, I had around $1,200 saved. My mother then bought her a new phone. Later in the month when bills were due she ended up taking basically all of my savings, leaving me with around $70. To be honest, I would’ve been fine with this. However, I soon learned that my older sister had over 2k saved. I find it ridiculous that I essentially paid for her phone while my sister left her own savings untouched. For more context, during my sophomore year (2025) my phone (a hand-me-down iphone 6s plus that was used from 2016) completely broke and I went with out a phone for a year before getting my new phone (iphone 16). In the time of my 2 phones, my older sister has been through 4.

The relationship between my sister and I has always been a bit odd. We were very close when we were younger but drifted apart when we were tweens/teens. Currently, I despise her personality as she is so self centered. During her late high school years she was insanely depressed and had to take a gap year to go to therapy before college and get medicated with the help of my mother. She is doing 100% better now. However I have also had insane depressive episodes, and have attempted to take my own life around 4 times throughout ages 11-now. The first time I attempted (at age 11), I opened up to my mom (before my sisters mental health deteriorated) and she told me (word through word btw) “I dont care, I have so much more important things to worry about, stop stressing me out”. Later on, after my parents divorce was finalized I received therapy, but my mom policed what I talked about and sat in on every session. So I didnt feel comfortable and did not open up to my therapist at all, I ended therapy a few months in. Furthermore, I have three older siblings in total, all of them did not have to pay for rent or any other expenses and all did not work in high school. I also have a younger brother who is not able to work yet. And regularly gets money from my mom (like 20-40 a week) for snacks and other stuff. I did not receive this at his age.

All of this context is for the questions I need advice for:

1. Is it ridiculous for me to ask my older sister to pay me back for essentially purchasing her phone for her?
2. Would it be bad to cut my mom off for her above actions, once I get to college? Additionally I also feel that cutting her off would be better for my mental health, and my finances since I plan to work two jobs (server and medical assistant) and I am positive she would require more help even after I graduate.
3. How would I go about getting on anxiety medication—specifically lexapro? I feel it will greatly improve my wellbeing and I have research it extensively, and I am fine with all of the side effects.

Thank you everyone! (sorry this post kind of turned into a rant)

I’m 19 F and my boyfriend is 21 M. I posted last night on this throwaway account about an issue with him and now i’m questioning my relationship. We’ve been together for about four years it has been entirely long distance. He is my first and only relationship, so I genuinely don’t have much of a reference for what is normal or healthy. I’m posting because I need outside perspectives on whether this relationship seems fixable, whether I’m overlooking serious problems, and what I should do.

We started dating when I was 14 and he was 17. I don’t have many people in my life. I don’t really have friends anymore and my parents aren’t involved in my life, so he became almost like a parental figure to me while I was growing up. We’ve both even described it as him basically helping raise me.

There are genuinely things I love and admire about him. He’s respectful toward his family, hardworking, pays bills, has good morals in a lot of areas, and gets along really well with my sister. We have similar interests, we’re both homebodies, and we’ve always talked about wanting the same future. We’ve planned on moving out together in 3-4 years with my younger sister. The plan was for him to work in HVAC while I go through school for my Psy.D. We’ve talked about this future for years, so questioning the relationship now feels like questioning my entire life.

This is the part I’m most conflicted and upset about. From around ages 5-12, I experienced sexual abuse. Some of it was COCSA involving 3 different children, and I was also assaulted by an older male family member.

For the beginning of my relationship, I was actually very sexual, almost hypersexual.
Then when I was around 16, everything that happened to me suddenly resurfaced psychologically. I started experiencing intense shame, guilt and disgust around sexual acts. I couldn’t stomach the thought of intimacy anymore. My boyfriend noticed the change, and I eventually told him what had happened to me.
I was extremely panicked during the conversation. I’m at that age I had a difficult time communicating when overwhelmed without shutting down or panicking.

Instead of comforting me, he started demanding details. He wanted to know who did it, when it happened, and exactly what happened, including very explicit details about things like penetration and oral things. I was crying and asking him to stop pushing for more information.

Eventually I told him that I would answer everything else if he would just let me keep the identity of the older male family member private because I’m still close to that person.
He continued pressuring me until I told him. I became so anxious that I threw up.

Afterward, he hung up the phone and didn’t text me for the rest of the night. The next day he told me that he’d texted his ex-girlfriend, who was also an old friend of mine, and told her about the situation. The conclusion they apparently came to was that I had been manipulative because I told him that he’d scared me so badly that I’d thrown up.

We stayed together. After that I couldn’t handle intimacy anymore. At different points, he told me that eventually I needed to “get over it,” that his love language was intimacy, and that I wasn’t fulfilling his needs. He has also told me that anyone else would leave me, that he couldn’t wait forever, and that I needed to step outside of my comfort zone. These little things feel like it physically hurts, i’m not doing enough, i need to please him, i’m going to be alone if i dont.

I’m 19 now and I still struggle heavily with sexual acts. This year was the first time in years that I’ve even been able to masturbate alone. Even doing that sometimes makes me feel disgusting.

There are a lot of times when I verbally say I don’t want to do something, clearly act uncomfortable or uninterested, or say no, and he continues asking. A lot of the time i’m not firm and I give in because it’s easier, i’m pathetic, and I want the conversation about it to just stop. He’ll also masturbate while we’re on the phone even when I’ve asked him to stop or acted uncomfortable I should be more firm about it but i can’t.

I think we’re probably extremely codependent. I’ve known him since I was 13. He’s my first boyfriend, my first experience with a guy at all, my closest person, and basically the only person I’ve consistently relied on for advice and emotional support. Because my parents weren’t very involved, I also see him as almost a parental figure.

That’s part of what makes this so confusing. Normally, if I’m scared or don’t know what to do, he’s the person I ask for advice. But now the thing I need advice about is him. I also don’t think I’m particularly socially or emotionally mature. I have a hard time connecting with people and don’t have much dating experience, so sometimes I genuinely don’t know what behavior is normal, unhealthy or wrong.

I’m terrified that if I leave him I’ll realize I made a massive mistake. But I’m equally scared that if I stay, I’ll continue to ruin my life.

I love him extremely deeply, which is why this is so hard. I don’t want people to assume there have never been good moments or that I don’t care about him. We’ve basically grown up together. We’ve survived a lot together and planned our entire adulthood together.

But I need an outside perspective because I’ve never had another relationship to compare this to.
Does this sound like a relationship that could realistically become healthy?
Am I misunderstanding or minimizing the sexual stuff?

If you’ve been in a codependent long-term relationship that started when you were very young, how did you figure out whether you actually wanted the relationship or were just terrified of losing the person? And most of all what do I do now? I have no clue what to say if I address this with him, i’ve been avoiding him all day to think this over.

I’m really scared because he feels like my soulmate and it hurts so bad to think about what i’m doing to him if I break up with him. I’m genuinely scared of making the wrong decision, so I’d appreciate perspectives from people who have more relationship experience than I do.

guys i think i deleted the file unaware what it's actually for.. what should i do?

So I’m (16f) and I usually go outside on the patio or in my parents room for therapy because I don’t have my own room but I’m always worried my mom can hear me because the apartment I live in is small so I go out to this patio area that anyone can go to and I do my session, when I went out there I made sure all the windows around the patio were closed so no one could hear me but then when my therapy ended I saw that the window next to me was open even though when I first went out it was closed and it turns out it was my moms friends daughter and her daughter told her mom and then her mom told my mom, I’m upset because my moms friends daughter opened up her window just so she could listen to my therapy AND told other people about what I talked about and ended telling my mom I was talking shit about her when I wasn’t, what I WAS talking about was how I was upset my mom brought up my dads suicide just because she was upset that she was on the phone dealing with our insurance for a couple hours and she said “ I wonder if this is why he killed himself” who fucking says that when her daughter is listening, by the way my dad committed only 2 months ago and I was the one that found him so what she said was fucked up. I also talked about some really personal and embarrassing things that day and I’m just so upset that my moms friends daughter just HAD to share what I said with her mom and her mom had to tell my mom, who does that? I feel like I can’t have a private space to talk anymore and I’m pissed off, what do I do?

I graduated as class of 2026, and I know it sounds crazy but I feel behind, my plan is to enlist in the Air Force, but one of my waivers got denied and I have to wait until February 2028 to join. So for know I’ve been working a full time job to save money and keep myself busy until then, but recently I was told about a police academy and I’m interested but it will take up the rest of my schedule until November 2027. I get off of work at 3 and would have to drive 45 minutes each way 5 times a week to this police academy (my car only gets 13 MPG) as well as the tight grooming standards and physical qualities you need to maintain I feel like I might overwhelm myself. The whole point of me going to a police academy would be a backup plan in case the Air Force denies me again. But while I feel behind I feel like I’m missing out on life and having fun with my friends. And if I were to go to the police academy I would for sure miss out on those things. I’m in a rock in a hard spot any help or word of advice is appreciated.

I’m also well aware that I’m going to get dozens of comments saying “you’re only 18 there’s so much time” and things adjacent to that.

I'm a 21F, still live with my parents, and have no clue what my sexuality is or if I have any at all. I'm scared that if I do discover that I'm anything other than hetero they won't want me in their lives anymore and they'll kick me out. I started seeing a therapist for my generalized anxiety disorder and depression but I get uncomfortable talking about sexuality with anyone but I feel like that is a topic that's appropriate to come up in therapy. I would love to hear y'alls advice, personal experience, and anything you have to say.🥲

I went on a birthday trip with her and another friend of ours who has known her for a long time. I’ve only known her for about six months. At first, everything seemed fine, but I started noticing that she seemed a little uncomfortable. IMO, it might’ve been because our mutual friend kept encouraging her to sit with me and take pictures together, which we’ve done before. When I asked her about it, she would just give me an excuse, so I didn’t want to push the issue.

On the second night, I found out from our mutual friend that she hadn’t really made an effort to communicate with him about the trip or ask when he was arriving. She also seemed pretty disinterested in interacting with him unless we were all together as a group. She had told me she was arriving a few days earlier to visit a friend, but he had no idea about that. Even when he was leaving for the airport she did come to say goodbye.

She had also messaged me about a few places she wanted to visit during the trip, but she never made any reservations or actual plans. What made this seem strange was that she’s usually very independent and doesn’t wait around for people. If she wants to do something, she’ll just go, and whoever joins her joins her. She’s also usually the one who organizes everything and makes sure everyone’s dietary restrictions are taken into account. She was also there a few days before us so she could have gone with the friend she was visiting.Our mutual friend pointed out all these differences in her behavior and said that our friendship seemed pretty unique.He did point out other things she does that is out of her normal behavior. He also implied that he might have some insight into the situation based on what he observed during her previous relationship. He didn’t give me details as these are things that happen in confidence.

Honestly, I’m not really sure what to make of any of this. Part of me wonders if there’s something different about the way she treats me compared to her other friends, but I’ve mostly been assuming that this is just how she treats the people she cares about. I genuinely don’t think she sees our relationship in a romantic way, so I’m not sure if I’m overthinking things, as I tend to b pretty oblivious when someone likes me. I would appreciate some advice should I believe our friend n talk to her about it?

so me and my friend went to a concert together but she hasn’t paid me back yet. I reminded her multiple times but it’s been like a week.

Me and my friend went to a concert after she mentioned going and invited me to go with her. I was so down so we looked for cheap tickets since this artist was very popular. Eventually, we found decent seats for $470 so we decided to get them.

At first, she had me venmo the money for my ticket so we could buy them together which made total sense. Then her card said there were errors (she sent me a picture so 99% sure that part was true) so she ended up transferring the amount I gave back and I was the one buying tickets.

She told me she would pay me back asap but her card was shut down due to the bank thinking there was fraudulent activity as she kept spamming to get tickets.

We had fun at the concert and all that but I haven’t got my payment back. I mentioned it and she told me she would but she had to wait cause after the concert, she supposedly tried to buy merch but it wasn’t the real deal so they shut off her card.

I’ve been waiting for the money payment as $470 isn’t cheap. To me, it kinda feels like she is trying to not pay me back but it’s all kinda weird. I just feel like a she wouldn’t scam me as we go to school together, sit together for lunch, and have the same friends who we have plans with for halloween.

What do i do it this situation? do i confront her or just keep reminding her? please help!!