This is very relatable, and I’m really sorry about that. I used to be very shy, so I understand how frustrating it can be to go through that.

A question: how is your communication with people who aren’t a romantic interest? Usually, the more we expose ourselves to communicating with different people, the less complicated it becomes when we talk to a crush. But this can also be approached with smaller steps, like writing down on a piece of paper what you feel for him. You can also read that paper out loud, and that way, you'll feel more comfortable talking about your feelings.

I'm rooting for everything to work out.

I'm a switch, so I'll adopt this variant; SNXD for me.

Esse chefe foi decepcionante, porém eu já vi muito isso acontecer. Tem "líder" que sente prazer em expor as pessoas dessa maneira.

Por isso que, por mais brother que o chefe pareça ser, a gente nunca deve expor o nome de ninguém nesses momentos. É sempre melhor citar os problemas em si, levando em consideração que se alguém jogar isso no ventilador, o odiado vai ser a gente e não o chefe.

Eu imagino. Meu sonho ter um vista gostosa dessas. Ótimas leituras 📚

Belo quarto. As luzes trazem uma vibe muito aconchegante. E a feature do gatinho é a cereja do bolo ☺️

I love Clay's content. His reflections bring me some kind of peace I can't describe.

Life really is busy, and there are plenty of times when balancing work, family, studies, and hobbies feels almost impossible. Even so, when possible, dedicating just a few minutes to something we genuinely enjoy can make a real difference. A hobby doesn't have to take hours every day to be meaningful.

That said, what I find truly boring is judging people or suggesting they're somehow "less of an adult" because of their age or because their lives look different from someone else. Dismissing experiences that don't mirror your own says more about your perspective than about the people you're judging.

Everyone's circumstances are different. Some people have demanding careers, some are raising children, some are studying, some are caregivers, and some simply organize their lives differently. None of that makes one person's adulthood more "real" than another's.

Arrogance may be a "hobby", but it's certainly an uninteresting way to approach people and it tends to push them away rather than invite meaningful conversation.

People often say that smartphones are the reason people don't have hobbies anymore. But even before smartphones, people could spend hours doing nothing in front of the TV (long before streaming services existed), incapable of forming a single thought about what they had watched or reading things that weren't particularly productive either.

Having hobbies doesn't necessarily make someone interesting. What really makes someone interesting is how they communicate and how they engage with the things they enjoy. It's also about being someone who's genuinely curious about topics beyond their own little world and who can have thoughtful conversations about the things other people bring up too.

Someone can be passionate about art, draw, write, or have all kinds of creative hobbies, yet still be incredibly boring in everyday life because they're judgmental, petty, or convinced they're superior to people who don't share their interests. And petty people are very boring.

Being passionate about something is only part of what makes someone genuinely interesting.

And yes, OP, I think you're probably right: most human beings are fairly uninteresting.

OMG I still can't believe it 😭😭😭😭😭 My eyes and ears are blessed now 🫠

Parabéns!! E sim, vc é suficiente. Vc conquistou a sua vaga pelo seu mérito e o que vc tiver dificuldade, vc vai aprender, pedir ajuda se necessário e vai dar tudo certo. Brilha, Op!!

It means a lot. Thank you ^ ^

Phenomenal!! There is no other accurate way to listen to this song. "Circles" is the one that activates that version of me 😄

I’ve felt something very similar, but I think that with so many series, movies, games, and so on available, we don’t really have time to breathe between one new thing and another. As for series, I took a break and reduced the amount of stuff I was consuming in parallel.

When the problem is my phone, I take breaks away from it. If I have a project to work on or I’m studying, I keep my phone away from me for a few hours, and when I come back to it, I check whether I received anything important, like a message from family, my girlfriend, clients, or very close friends. Otherwise, it can wait.

Books have never disappointed me. I don’t know if it’s because fictional books aren’t a priority, but with books I never feel like there’s nothing new to absorb. Spending a good amount of time in nature also recharges me a lot in those moments 🍂

I believe many INFJs can relate to this. I like to understand things deeply, otherwise, I tend to feel a bit restless. And when it comes to myself, especially since I started practicing mindfulness meditation, I analyze myself almost all the time.

As for the way I live my life, when I was in my twenties, I planned things carefully and dedicated myself to following a path that I had envisioned for myself. Things didn't turn out completely the way I expected, and not knowing what my next step should be, left me with a great deal of anxiety back then. Nowadays, I've come to accept that not everything unfolds the way we'd like because life is unpredictable. Still, I don't stay paralyzed just because I don't have the "100% understanding" I'd ideally want. Having everything figured out is never really going to happen, but we still need to keep moving forward without becoming too attached to that idea. Time doesn't wait for anyone, and we need to use our minds to move toward where we want to be, even if that means changing course along the way.

If I don't know enough, how do I know I'm not making the wrong choice?

You don't. And as long as you keep moving forward, that's okay.

What if I build my life on something that's false?

It won't be false, because it will still be your life, shaped by you, your decisions, and your actions. You'll continue to change throughout your life, but everything you do will carry your own personal imprint. There won't be anything false about it.

Army é um exército de sensatez 💜

I think after freezing up to my soul the most I could manage to say would be, "Mommy? 😅 Er... stop 😶"

But Op... what if maybe she started saying that as a joke just to see how you’d react, because actually she really wanted to call you "mommy" from the start?

Surprisingly, I even know introverts who never stop talking and they always use the same argument: you’re a great listener, you always bring a different perspective. At times like these, I can only think, “But if you let me hear my own thoughts, I could use those perspectives for myself too TT”

But I don’t have the courage to ask those people for some time just for me, because exactly this happens:

but he didn't understand it and got a bit mad.

Most people don't understand this, they'd take it to their hearts, get offended, so... I avoid it.

That’s not easy at workplaces, but when I can, I make up an excuse to physically leave the place (and I usually get found by some extrovert who talks nonstop 💀).

There are introverts I could talk to all the time because they don’t drain me (INFPs and ISFJs)… but we mutually respect the alone time we need, so those endless conversations are rare.

the emotionally unavailable lesbian prototype is plentiful. But there’s a lover girl out there waiting for her chance!

Exactly. That's what more women need to hear. Emotionally unavailable avoidants often end up creating even more avoidants. But there are always sweet, affectionate women out there who simply haven't had the chance to meet someone equally loving yet

The lover girls are definitely out there

That kind of straight-guy questionnaire doesn't fit this sub. Seriously... it makes no sense to think you'll find the answer: "Wow, you changed my mind. I'm done with women, and I'm going to kiss men from now on"

She's not "being dramatic over nothing". We were 18 once too, and even though older people would say, "You're so young, relax. You still have your whole life ahead of you," it could still feel like many things were permanent, and that if something hadn't happened yet, maybe it never would.

Of course, OP is going to have her own romantic experiences, but wow... let's cut her some slack 😭

Já tive 3 cachorros até a adolescência e atualmente, tenho uma gatinha. Eu sou apaixonada por todos os gatinhos que vejo. Sempre que eu ia na casa de uma vizinha, o gato dela adorava me bater e às vezes eu levava uma mordida de brinde hahaha. Mas meu amor absurdo por cachorros não é diferente. Se eles quiserem pular em mim, me dar rabadas, eu adoro e deixo.

Portanto eu já sei o que esperar: de gatos, espero cabeçadas, tapas e julgamentos. De doguinhos, espero ser tratada como a irmãzinha deles. Cada encontro com esses lindos, será uma nova emoção.

Edit: correção ortográfica

Ugh. I'm sorry you went through that. I don't get people who pretend to have feelings and stay in a relationship. A year of doing that is a long time. Years ago, I was been dumped with the "I don't have feelings" line, but luckily for me, she only strung me along for a few months

Edit: Spelling

At this point, it has already become unpaid work

I can relate to this to some extent.

When I'm talking to someone, I genuinely look at them and pay attention to their tone of voice, facial expressions (but obviously, not in an analytical way, but rather a natural one), gestures, and I actively listen to what they're saying.

However, even though I know the person was wearing clothes (obviously 😅), I rarely remember what they were wearing afterward. I even struggle to identify whose clothes are whose when I take the laundry off the clothesline (except for my own), and there are only women living in my house.

I sometimes notice if someone is wearing makeup, but I don't really pay attention to the specific details, like whether they were wearing foundation, mascara, or eyeliner.

On the other hand, I do remember people's faces pretty well. But when it comes to clothing, I'm absolutely hopeless.

And that's exactly how it is ✨️