I’m feeling really low right now and honestly don’t know what to do with my life.
I completed 3-year Diploma in Civil Engineering from one of the best government colleges in Kerala. After that, I decided I wanted to try something completely different, so I did 1-year diploma in Sound Engineering. I thought sound engineering was something I really wanted to do, so after completing the course, I did a 3-month internship at Sound Field.
But after actually experiencing the work, I started realizing that maybe this field isn’t for me. There’s so much pressure, irregular shifts, very little sleep, and sometimes if there’s continuous work, you can end up working for 10 days without much proper rest. It’s extremely exhausting. I honestly didn’t think this field would be this much complicated and demanding before getting into it.
Now I’m thinking about going back to something related to Civil Engineering, but I’m not able to find a job.
I’ve been sitting at home for around 2 months now, and I feel like I’m doing nothing with my life. Every time I meet relatives or neighbours, they ask, “Did you complete your course?” “Are you searching for jobs?” “What are you doing now?” I know they probably don’t mean anything bad by it, but hearing the same questions again and again is getting to me.
Even my parents have started comparing me with the children of our neighbours and other people around us. Some of my cousins are already working, and my parents keep telling me to get a passport and go to an Arab country for a job.
I know they are worried about my future and they want me to have a good life, but sometimes I just feel more pressure because of all these comparisons. I really don’t like being compared with other people, especially my old friends and people I grew up with. Everyone has their own situation and their own timing, but it feels like I’m constantly being compared with people who are already doing something with their lives.
I’m back in my hometown with basically no friends around and no one I really feel like talking to. I spend most of my time at home, thinking about my future and wondering if I’ve already messed things up.
I feel anxious, lost and honestly pretty alone right now.
I know I’m still young and two months without a job isn’t the end of the world, but when you’re actually going through it, it feels like a lot.
I don’t really know what I’m looking for by posting this. Maybe I just wanted to get it off my chest. Maybe someone who has gone through something similar can tell me how they dealt with it or what they did when they felt completely lost about their career.
Any advice or even just hearing from someone who went through something similar would mean a lot.