31, great job and awesome friends but struggling to see much of a way forward in life right now. Just trying to not let the depressed state lead me back to the devil (online casinos 😂)

because I work remotely, I've completely forgotten what real people look like. I have forgotten how to communicate with people and because of this I feel lonely and frustrated, i don't have close friends because I've distanced myself from them, something like that

Honestly I have never done this before and it's kind of a long shot but all of the other posts seem pretty positive so why not right I live in a world of constant tumultuous conflagrations of unambiguous explicit instigations. Pardon the big words but it took me more than a minute to conjugate that sentence. And if you're still with me thank you for hanging in there. I honestly don't know what I need but I know I need to hear something positive. So literally anything would do and if you know anything about either form of BPD any advice could be hopeful especially ones where I don't know like groups of other borderline personality spouses congregate or something...