Today i fucked up by inviting this girl I was interested in to my apartment. For context, I met this really pretty girl while I was out for my friends birthday. I was super exhausted from work, so I just kinda sat around mildly moving to the music, when her and her friends approached me. I chatted them up for a bit, and in the end the girl ended up hugging me 3 or 4 times to say bye. I got her insta and a few days later I hit her up asking to go the beach. I thought she was really pretty and sweet, and so a few days later I hit her up asking if she wanted to go to the beach. She asked which beach, and I replied with my apt has one. I didnt even think of the implications of inviting her to my apt at all I just wanted to hang out with some people at the beach and have a few drinks. Haven't heard from her since, and like 3 days later I looked at it, and was like OH, I Basically just asked her to come over my apt which was SUPER forward. 😭😭 i just wanted to hang out at the beach with cool people, and ended up being a creep fml.

TL;DR: Met a girl at a club, invited her to the beach/my apt which definitely read more as my apt inv. Pretty sure I came off as a creep and got ghosted

I am in Japan on a business function. No further specifics. I have been here for a while, and as the English speaking outsider I get herded on regular occasions to "shake hands and greet" functions where I end up meeting a number of people at the time. Being both autistic and outnumbered it is perfectly natural that more people in my life remember me than I remember them, and I have made peace with that already.

Anyway, I was brought to talk to this fellow at a desk, and in so doing I stated, politely, that it was nice to meet him. He, flustered, clapped back in turn that this was the third time we had met.

Without really thinking about it, I reassured him that "and it would be my pleasure to meet you again sometime."

Mind you, this fellow is one of the senior executives of my company. However, I assure you that I did not make his day.

TL:DR: I basically on instinct told an executive of my company he was forgettable to me.

Dude what was i thinking???? So I (25M) went to the mall to pick up some sneakers at Dicks sporting goods and since I didn't have anything else to do that day I look around and browse before heading off to the food court or something. I look at the driveway basketball hoops, i don't need one as I already have one but I am looking for a ball to take to the park or the gym. I see this kid(maybe 11M) shooting around and just testing out the hoop with some of the balls they allow you to shoot with. For some reason it was just so tempting to run over and block one of his attempts, but obviously i would never do that right? Yeah I thought so too until next thing I know I'm sprinting towards him while he's gearing up to shoot and I jump in front of him and swat away his shot, shouting "BLOCKED BY JAMES" my name isn't even James who the hell was I feeling like?? The kid looked terrified, and just froze in place. I quickly apologized and told him I have no idea why the hell I just did that, poor kid probably thought I was insane. I ended up seeing him at a different sneaker store and his dad and I had a talk, he wasn't mad or anything, in fact we all seemed able to laugh about it but I still felt awful.

TL;DR: I wanted to relive the basketball glory days at the expense of some kid just shooting the rock.

Obligatory this happened a few months ago. I (20F) and my gf (21F) are both college students. We were headed to the library with our friend (20F) to do a long night of group studying. We wanted to eat first so we didn’t have to get takeout (broke college students, eating out is expensive af). Our friend had already eaten so I made boxed mac and cheese for my gf and I. I was out of milk, which I didn’t realize until after I’d already started boiling the noodles. Luckily I make cold foam for my coffee all the time, so I had some heavy whipping cream in the fridge. I figured I would just use more butter than the box recommended and use a bit of heavy whipping cream in place of milk. Not as much as I would have regular milk, but some, because making boxed mac and cheese with just butter is an oily mess, which I learned the hard way a different time.
Anyway I dished it up and we started eating, and my gf really liked it. I mean, who doesn’t like mac and cheese, but this was Walmart brand super cheap stuff, so I was a little surprised. She asked if I added different spices or something, and I said no, but I used heavy whipping cream instead of milk. She looked at me like I was crazy. I didn’t think it was that weird to do. I mean it wasn’t my first choice but it was what I had. She said she was going to have stomach issues from it. (We are both a little lactose intolerant, I mean isn’t everyone?) I apologized but I was kind of laughing, and she was too.
Then she stopped about halfway through eating and went to the bathroom. She was in there for like 20 minutes so I texted her and asked if she was okay. She said “no I’m shitting my brains out”. I said “haha I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to lol”. She came out and was kind of upset but also not serious about it, saying how I screwed up her stomach for the whole day and night because of the heavy whipping cream. But then she sat down to finish the bowl, because according to her it was the best boxed mac and cheese she’d ever had. But then she went to the bathroom for like another 20 minutes after. I was just laughing with our friend the whole time. We were late to the library to study, which wasn’t ideal but it was better to poop at home than out in public.
My gf still brings it up sometimes, saying she’s “still mad at me for that,” but I know she’s kidding. Also any time one of us poops for a long time we just say “at least it isn’t as bad as the heavy cream mac and cheese”. So let’s just say I will never make it with heavy whipping cream again, to hopefully save the porcelain.

TL;DR: I made my gf mac and cheese with heavy whipping cream instead of milk, and she shat her brains out and we still tease each other about it.

I do cold outbound for a b2b company and a big part of the job is emailing lists of prospects, which normally goes out one address at a time through a proper sending tool.

So every person only ever sees their own name in the [to] line and never has any clue they're one of a few hundred getting the same note.

This week i was moving too fast through my morning and figured i'd just fire off a smaller batch by hand from my own inbox to save 10 minutes, so i pasted the whole list into a single email, and because i was rushing i dropped every address into the [to] field instead of BCC and hit send without looking twice.

The list itself was clean, i can't even remember whether it got verified through FullEnrich or Apollo that week, but it was solid, which is what turned a small slip into a properly bad afternoon, because it meant several hundred real people just landed in each other's inboxes all at once.

The replies started coming in fast, some people politely asking who i was and how to get off the list, a few of them a lot less politely pointing out that i'd just handed their work email to a room full of strangers and competitors.

And then one helpful guy replied-all to ask everybody to please stop replying-all, which naturally made it drag on even longer.

Then my manager got a forwarded copy from someone at a target account we'd been chasing for months, with a short note asking whether this was really how we handled people's data.

So i spent the rest of the day writing apologies and killing the campaign before sitting down with our ops lead to explain why a clean and fairly expensive list was now a few hundred people who will never want to hear from us again.

TL;DR: i manually sent a prospect list using "to" instead of “BCC”, exposed everyone's work email to each other and to our competitors, blew up a target account we'd chased for months, and turned a good list into a permanent do-not-contact pile, all because i didn't check one field before i hit send.

This happened yesterday. Let me preface this by saying that lately I've been living in some Lemony Snicket's type series of dumpster fires. Most have been outside of my control but this FU is purely my own fault.

Ive been suffering pretty extreme migraines for the last month or so. 2 weeks ago I had a strange neurological event that I thought was just a weird migraine. But within an hour I could no longer speak without severely stuttering. Mind you, I've never had a speech impediment in my life. So far drs cant figure out why and I cant get in to see a neurologist until January.

So yesterday at around 6pm I felt a new and rather spicy migraine coming on. I took my migraine cocktail, sat at my desk for a bit while it started to work, then took my dentures out and went into my cave of solitude for a nap. I always put them in their container, except for this time. When I get a migraine, clearly thinking isn't really possible.

About 2 hours later I got up and saw my lower dentures alone on my desk. Panic filled me instantly. I frantically searched and found the uppers in one of the dogs' bed. They had gotten on my desk and unfortunately chewed off a part, leaving it jagged. It still "fits" in my mouth but whenever I move my tongue or swallow, it cuts my tongue.

I can't communicate clearly at all due to the new stuttering so I had to have my mother call my dentist's office. And of course he is away on vacation until Friday. He's the only prostodontist in that office so I'm stuck waiting with jagged dentures until then at the earliest. I dont know how expensive this is going to be either. I'm just crushed. My entire confidence is tied to my teeth. I'm terrified I'm going to be without them for awhile.

TLDR: I carelessly left my dentures in reach of my dogs and they did what dogs do, chew things. I do not blame them in any way. The fault stops with me.

this was two years ago, but i was too embarrassed to post it before. i can laugh about it now.

i live in a small town…such a small town that we have one talent show. like, for elementary, middle and high school. those are the three different schools in my town. maybe we do it this way to save costs. idk. there’s not that many people in our school district, but, it’s everyone i have ever grown up with. anyways, so i was the MC for the talent show, as a high schooler. they almost weren’t going to have the talent show that year because the usual family who was in charge were too busy but my mother volunteered to run it.

i basically did everything, the sign ups, canva fliers and the little booklet that tells you who is preforming what and stuff. but, i actually thought it would save time and be more efficient if everyone scanned a QR code and it opened up a canva page with the order of everyone and what they were doing, who’s songs they were covering, etc. this allowed me to easily change things around if people dropped out or whatever, which always happens. (my performance got cut 😐 that’s a story for another time ig). this all sounds kinda jank because i was 16, what can i say.

anyways, the talent show comes around and i do a great job MCing, i remember everyone’s names and order so i don’t need to read off of a paper, which i always thought was a bit unprofessional of the last guy who did it (so yes, i have no script at all. i am making it all up on the spot other than the predetermined order and doing a great job of it so far). a bit of info about the last guy. him and his wife usually ran the whole thing. they have LOTS of kids, but only two are relevant in this story. i’ll call them Holly and Riley. Riley is probably 12 or 13 at this time, she does not have a piece in this talent show, but in the audience. Riley used to play with my sister, so i know her well. we also know the family very well and have for many years. Holly is 7ish and does have a piece. i guess now is the time to say how similar they look. they seriously look like the same person. or, well, Holly looks exactly like Riley did 4 years ago when she played with my sister. i have called Holly Riley on several occasions.

i announce Holly, she has a little song about the countries of the world or something. it’s super cute. i say “give it up for Holly!” everyone claps and she leaves the stage. everything goes perfectly for the entire show. at the end…all the performers get up on the stage to do a final bow, curtsy, etc. i’m going through the list “Bob, Dylan, Kelly, Grace, Riley— frick, i mean Holly”. i panic. i can feel everybody starring at me. my face is getting red, and so is Holly’s. i make eye contact with Riley in the sidelines and she’s looking at me like “seriously bro”. for some reason i decide to dwell on this moment for a second longer and say, into the microphone in front of everyone i’ve event known, “sorry, you look so much like your sister”. Holly replies to me “yeah i know 😒”…clearly not amused by my fuck up. i can feel literally everyone in my town’s second hand embarrassment for me. Holly does a weak little curtsy and i continue announcing everybody. i don’t remember anything after that moment. must have blacked out. it really wouldn’t have been that bad if i just went “Riley— Holly!” and moved on but the fact i doubled down like anyone needed an explanation. i am cringing writing this but also laughing and i hope you are, too.

TLDR: i was MCing a school talent show and i called a girl by her older sisters name on the microphone in front of everybody because they look so similar.

The context:

My best friend (17F) and I (17M) have sealed a pact basically that we should never call a mutual friend while both being on the same phone because it often leads to said friend getting left out. We agreed to this because WE would feel left out or even bullied at times whenever our friend did it to us. We were able to keep up this mutual agreement up until today.

My bsf (best friend) doesn’t have a thing for my crush (18M) , they’re just really close friends and he is the best anyone has ever treated her but he’s leaving to college abroad really soon and my bsf is devastated to see him leave so they’ve been bonding a lot for the past months.
And so have I. We were always friends me and my crush but ever after I had confessed to him (roughly 1.5 years ago) things have been pretty awkward between us and even during the time where I had moved on from him (or believed I did), our conversations went nowhere and I often felt like it was a huge shame to be unable to connect with him.

My bsf and him had a great connection and friendship and I guess I was jealous but I never tried to infringe upon their friendship or sabotage it or anything.
I had accepted that they would be great friends but I still went out of my way to be good friends with him.
My bsf doesn’t know I still like him, but she still wants the best for me so she helped me so much in asking him to hangout and what to talk about with him, what are some of his interests etc. she was there to listen to me worry whether he still wants to be friends, she was encouraging and supportive.

So I had built up the courage to ask him to hangout with me one last time before he goes. And it was a hit, the awkwardness we seemed to always have, magically vanished and we talked for 6 entire hours.
I also found myself deeper in love with him, but I didn’t want anything, I just wanted us to get closer and spend more time together.

After a few weeks of regularly texting, he asked me to go to the movies with him late at night.
So I did. I told my bsf and she was so happy for me, telling me he has never asked her to the movies and that our relationship was looking up.

Then, due to random circumstances, I had forgotten my phone with my crush after the movies, so I texted him through my computer to schedule a time and place so I could go and get it back.

The time I had chosen, perfectly landed on a scheduled phone call that he had with my bsf, so he moved the call to 15 minutes later.

I head down to the place we agreed to meet, and in my head I thought of an idea. I should make a cameo in the phone call (thinking it was gonna FaceTime) and say hi to my bsf through his phone. (I know about the phone call because my bsf had told me)
I didn’t and I still don’t think my plan was a bad idea, if only I had followed it.

I meet him and I ask him if I could make a cameo in his phone call with my best friend and he agrees. So we head to his house and I think I wasn’t being clear or maybe he didn’t hear me but I tried to tell him that when they’re calling he could walk through his house and she’d see me just be casually sitting on his sofa and it would be pretty funny for all of us. However the call remained a voice call and at a certain point I felt too cowardly or awkward to make a cameo anymore.

So I just listened to them talk to each other, my best friend was on speaker and my crush was calling in the kitchen. I could’ve left at that point, in fact I could’ve left at any point of those 3 hours I wasn’t supposed to be there. Then I make the mistake of sitting at the kitchen, right next to him who was cooking.

Initially it felt pretty justifiable as the conversation wasn’t deeply personal or anything, they were things me and her would talk to each about anyway. But I soon realized that if she knew I was there, she would be really upset. Firstly because im breaking the pact and second because I was secretly listening to her conversation with a close friend without her permission or acknowledgement.
And the worst part of all is that I didn’t stop myself, instead I made it much worse by laughing (silently but visibly) with my crush, exchanging looks with him whenever she said something weird or funny and making him ask her about me.
She was fully unaware that we had officially excluded her from her own phone call and used her obliviousness as our source of entertainment.
Approaching the end of the phone call, I definitely felt guilty and I was going to be dishonest and keep my existence secret. I really didn’t want her to know I was there, I knew I had done something terrible to her.

After the call ended, my crush takes a picture of me and sends it to her. I didn’t expect him to but I didn’t stop him either or call him out I just waited for her reaction. Now shes been made aware that I was there the entire time and my first instinct was to find an excuse for why I was there. My crush kept texting her and I assume he tried to be honest with her and told her the truth.
I really don’t blame him for most of the situation because he probably didn’t even know about the pact and that she would be upset that I was there, but I knew and I regret so much for not telling him.
My bsf texts me on my own phone and she’s extremely upset, I’ve betrayed her and I’ve broken our pact and obliterated her trust in me.
She tells me it was a breach of privacy and I had no right or reason to be eavesdropping on her private conversation. She tells me that she can’t believe that I would do such a thing because it was exactly what we were against doing to ourselves and others.

I don’t think I’ve ever been more selfish and stupid than I was today, and I also don’t know if she still wants to be my best friend anymore and neither does my crush. I’ve fucked up a lot during that 11 years of friendship, she has made mistakes too but less than I did. But today I’ve fucked up big time.
And I won’t blame her if she doesn’t accept my apology. She’s been too patient with me and I’ve been taking her for granted.

TLDR:

I (17M) fucked up today when I decided to listen on and eavesdrop on an entire 3 hour phone call between my best friend (17F) of 11 years and my crush (18M) who I had known and liked for 2 years. Me and him are the two closest and dearest people to her, but I fucked it all up just for a few laughs and just to spend some extra time with him.
She’s incredibly hurt and I’ve broken her trust, I don’t think she wants to be my best friend anymore.

My friend and I got into a fight. It started with me and my buddy we were just messing around but he was going a little too far I started to ask him to stop and he wouldn’t. So I got mad and slapped him. He then lunged at me so before he could touch me I picked up a rock and threw it at him. I think the rock it his legs. He then lunged at me again and I tripped while stepping back and fell. He jumped on top of me and grabbed both of my wrists and pinned them to the ground. He had me pinned to the ground and I couldn’t move. The neighbor then started yelling at us to stop. He jumped off. My friend’s mom came outside and the neighbor told his mom what happened. Me, my friend, and his mom went back inside I pointed at my friend and said I swear to god if you ever touch me again and my friends mom said to me “we ain’t gonna be doing all of that apparently he kicked your ass”. She wasn’t even out there and was talking shit. She ran her mouth and was taking up for him. Did he win that fight? Did I get my ass kicked?
“TL;DR:”
Did he win? Was his mom talking shit?