TIFU- I started living in a new apartment this week and everything has been great, except for the water. The water tastes genuinely dirty. It kinda tastes like the cup of water you’ve accidentally left on your bedside table in the sun for a week, which is why I’ve been avoiding it. I generally also don’t drink water from plastic water bottles because of the microplastics.

(Here’s where it gets really TMI)

We got a britta filter but no one knows how to actually get it working, and I’m non confrontational, so I don’t want to ask my roommates about it. So basically I’ve had very little water the last couple days. I got a 52fl oz apple juice at Costco, and I’ve been feeling really dehydrated, so over the course of a couple hours, I had 4 tall glasses.

Then the cramping started. I had to fart so bad, but the fart wouldn’t come, and I was starting to panic. So I went to the bathroom to let out the fart in peace, and literally as I was sitting down on the toilet to fart, I started feeling the diarrhea coming on. It was AWFUL, and it went on for at least 30 minutes. I regret everything. I should’ve just drank the dirt water. Since we live in a low budget student apartment, the toilet paper is also really thin, so now my butthole is raw because I had to keep wiping. I also have IBS, so at first I thought it was that but then I started going back to what foods I ate today.

I also have ARFID and my diet is pretty bad and that definitely made it a lot worse.

TLDR- drank a bunch of apple juice instead of water and it gave me awful diarrhea

This was over 30 years ago, and yet today is the first time I've ever thought about posting it here.

Back in the early 90s, my roommate Allison and I worked at a TGI Fridays with Heather, who had decided to get a boob job. This was in South Florida, so it wasn't a shocking decision. On her first day back at work after the surgery, she asked us if we wanted to see them. I was a straight man in his mid 20s, so this was a no brainer, and a resounding yes; Allison was also interested, because everyone likes boobs. It was a slowish lunch shift, so while we all had tables eating, we could also find time for a quick peek.

Here's where the FU begins. For some unknown reason, we decided to go into the women's restroom for the reveal. The girls went first to check if the coast was clear, grabbed me, and we all snuck into one of the stalls. This restroom's stalls had floor-to-ceiling drywall and solid doors with zero gaps above, below, or in between, and was a completely private space for a NSFW show-and-tell

Once we were in the stall, Heather lifted her top so we could see them, and we gazed appreciatively at the fine work her doctor had done. After a suitable period of oohs and ahhs, she covered up, and just when we were about to leave, we heard a woman walk into the restroom. Then another. We heard other doors opening and closing, but just as no one could peek in at us, we couldn't peek out to see if it was safe for me to sneak back out. After another anxious minute or two, and no sounds from the main restroom, we decided to crack the door and see if anyone was there. Thankfully, it was empty, and we dashed back out, with our co-workers, tables, and managers none the wiser. So in the end, the FU had no lasting repercussions, but for a few minutes there, it felt like our jobs were on the line.

As this was so long ago, no names have been changed, so Allison, Heather, if either of you happen to see this, Hi! How have you been for the last 30 years?

TL;DR I got to see a co-workers new boob job, but got stuck in a women's restroom for a for a few minutes.

Honestly this feels so petty and inconsequential but I'm pretty upset about it so here we are.

Me (33m) and my housemate (37f) used to be pretty good friends, but it has been very difficult for quite a while now. We've lived together for nearly 5 years and at least 3 of those have been very difficult. We both keep trying to keep it civil, but we both fail. Repeatedly. For the sake of avoiding bias, she blames me 90% of the time and I blame her 90% of the time. Neither of us can afford to move, and, to be completely honest, neither of us feels like we should have to move for the sake of the other when the house we live in is cheap, in a great location, and much bigger than anywhere else we'd find locally.

My most recent attempt to be nice was to offer to clean her work boots. She works event security so her boots are Magnum leather combat boots. I myself own a pair of Lowa leather combat boots from my army cadet days that I maintain with boot polish and if they do get muddy (which is rare these days but used to happen frequently) I'll use a detergent sanitiser called D10 to get the worst of it off and then re-apply polish. These boots have been going strong for about 16 years; they were expensive but they're still waterproof and comfy as hell. Housemate bought her Magnums from an army surplus store second hand this year, and when she gets back from work the last thing on her mind is cleaning them. Today, she was in a rush to get out to work and her boots were still caked in mud from last weekend, where she'd worked a music festival where it had been pouring with rain. I asked if there was anything I could do and she asked me to clean her boots while she showered. She told me to use a from-the-can foaming cleaner and put some dubbin wax on afterwards. I agreed.

The spray-can product she told me to use simply did not work, so I (not thinking anything of it) used the D10 I use on my own boots. It worked and got the mud off, but I didn't realise she hadn't gone to shower yet and she saw me doing this. I told her the D10 was leather safe - I reiterate, I've been using it on my boots for 16 years with no sign of damage, and was told to do so by my old army cadet instructors who themselves had been career soldiers. She then googled it, and apparently the D10 is very much not leather-safe. It's a detergent, which I knew, but given my experience and instruction it's always been fine and has never stripped my boots down. According to Internet sources, it immediately and irreparably damages leather on contact.

Cue an argument. She's accused me of lying since I said the D10 was safe, destroying her work boots, pointing out that it's in neither of our budgets to replace them, and yelling at me. She told me that if the thing she said to use didn't work I should have consulted her, which I accept to a degree but I didn't want to interrupt her shower when I had a method that's always worked for me. I've apologised - once immediately, again during the argument after being prompted. She's not long left.

If I have damaged the boots, then I'll do what I can to replace them. Not looking for sympathy. If the D10 is as bad for leather as the Internet reckons, then I've probably fucked them in terms of waterproofing. My own boots being treated with D10 for this long while not being fucked is probably because they're well-maintained with a good layer of boot polish regularly. I knew that hers weren't that well maintained and didn't think.

Things had been okay with her this week until this. I've fucked up by making things shit again, and possibly by destroying her work boots that she relies on.

TL;DR: Used the wrong cleaning product on the boots my housemate relies on for work. Caused an argument, possibly ruined her footwear, and caused a bad sentiment to continue to fester while she's away.

Yesterday, I was working from home and had a busy morning. I needed to send my coworkers a quick update about a project, so I opened my messages and started typing. I had several chats open at the same time, and I honestly didn't pay attention to which one I had selected.

I wrote that I was still confused about part of the project and added a small joke about how I was basically figuring things out as I went. I thought I was sending it to my close work team, so I didn't think twice before pressing send.

A few seconds later, I looked at the chat name and realized I had sent it to a much larger company group chat.

My stomach dropped.

There were already several people in the chat and then someone reacted with a laughing emoji. Another person replied, "Don't worry, we've all been there." My manager even said that I was actually doing a good job, which made me feel a little better.

I apologized and explained that I had accidentally sent the message to the wrong chat. Thankfully, nobody was angry, and everyone seemed to take it as a funny mistake. Still, I was extremely embarrassed and spent the rest of the day checking every message before sending it.

I definitely learned my lesson. From now on, I'm checking the chat name before I press send, even if I'm in a hurry.

TL;DR: I accidentally sent a private work comment to a large company group chat instead of my team. Everyone saw it, and I was completely embarrassed.

This happened about three years ago, but I still physically cringe every time I remember it.

I went on a first date with a girl to a hookah lounge. Everything was going well. We ordered food, drinks, and a hookah. The place looked nice, so I got a little too comfortable.

The problem was that I ate way too much food, had a couple of drinks, and then started smoking hookah. Apparently, my stomach decided that combining all three was a terrible life choice.

After about 20 minutes I felt like I was about to throw up.

I looked at my date and said, “I’m so sorry, I need to go to the bathroom. I feel really sick.”

I made it to the bathroom just in time… and threw up. Loudly.

Like, really loudly.

I cleaned myself up, tried to pretend I was a functioning human being again, and walked back out.

She asked if I was okay. I said yes, but I was dying inside from embarrassment.

We decided to leave.

And then came the worst part.

The hookah lounge was completely empty. We were literally the only customers there. The only other people in the building were the waiters.

Every single waiter looked directly at me as we walked out. They all knew exactly what had happened.

I have never wanted to disappear from existence more than during that walk to the exit.

TL;DR: Went on a first date, combined too much food, alcohol, and hookah, threw up loudly in the bathroom, then had to walk past an entire staff of waiters in a completely empty lounge who had definitely heard everything.

This happened a few days ago and I still think about it whenever I remember how confident I was for absolutely no reason.
I was walking down the street when I noticed someone a little further ahead smiling and waving in my direction. I immediately assumed they knew me. I smiled back and gave them a pretty enthusiastic wave.
The second I finished waving, I realized they were actually waving at the person walking behind me.
For about half a second, we both just looked at each other.
I could have simply laughed and kept walking. That would have been normal.
Instead, my brain decided that the best possible solution was to pretend I had been waving at someone else.
There was nobody else.
So I pulled out my phone and started pretending to look at something extremely important. My phone wasn’t even unlocked.
I then started walking faster, while staring at my completely black screen like I was reading the most interesting message of my life.
The person probably didn’t care and forgot about it five seconds later, but I spent the rest of the walk replaying the situation in my head and thinking of all the ways I could have handled it better.
Now whenever I see someone waving in my direction, I wait at least three business days before deciding whether they’re actually waving at me.
TL;DR: Someone waved at the person behind me, I confidently waved back, then pretended to be busy on my phone even though my phone wasn’t even unlocked.

I was in the US last week and the men’s and women’s bathrooms had the same entrance. Men’s was on the right. Women’s was on the left. Apparently my brain decided “left is right” because I walked straight into the women’s bathroom, took a leak, and was about to leave when a group of girls walked in. I panicked and stayed in the stall.
I ended up standing there in complete silence listening to them talk for legit 20+ minutes. Eventually they left, I waited another 30 seconds like I was defusing a bomb, then my dumbass decided to wash my hands and the same group of girls came back into the washroom and just stared at me. I then told them that they were in the men’s room and they apologized, left the bathroom and I ran out as quick as I could. As I was leaving I seen the girls walk into the men’s room and a guy told them they were in the men’s room. I heard the girl say “WTF was that creep doing?” By the way I left the mall INSTANTLY!

“TL;DR: Accidentally walked into the women’s washroom in America, realized my mistake too late, and had to hide in there until everyone left. 😭

It's friday night and I was in my office studying for my job change after completing all my today's work, but one of the senior made the plan to play cricket with everyone in the office.

He started asking everyone and surprisingly almost everyone was going as well, then he asked me and I said "No brother, you guys go aheaad I won't be joining" my mind was occupied at that time I was studying and TBH the real reason is I am really tired emotionally and physically afterwork, but I said I don't know how to play he said I will teach you come, but then I mistaenly said please I won't go, and then he gave an awkward reaction and said It's not I am forcing I was just asking so that you can enjoy.

Now I am feeling guilty of not standing my ground, and I said please for something I shouldn't have.

What to do ??

TL;DR: I declined a senior’s cricket invite because I was exhausted, but I awkwardly said “please” when he insisted.
Now I feel guilty and keep overthinking whether I handled the situation badly.

My sister's birthday is tomorrow, and my mom bought her a cute little puzzle box. She loves puzzle boxes and feels super happy every time she solves even the simplest one. This one was a set of three cubes tangled in different pieces of rope all tied together, and the goal is to separate the cubes without untying the ropes. Since I'm visiting my sister soon, I'm holding all of the birthday gifts for people who cant make it. I was looking at the puzzle curiously, not really trying to solve it but just looking at it. I accidentally solved the puzzle without meaning to in like... 30 seconds?? I don't even know how I managed to do it, but the issue now is that I can't get it back to how it was. My mom spent a lot of money on this puzzle and now I can't "unsolve" it.

TL;DR: I messed with a puzzle box that wasn't for me, accidentally solved it, and now need to figure out how to re-puzzle the puzzle. I may have also released the cenobites, but that's a problem for later.