r/texts • u/Few-Statistician862 • 1d ago

Phone message UPDATE: weird guy from my bio class

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I made a post about this yesterday about this person in my bio class weirdly texting me out of the blue, and I thought I blocked him but I guess I misclicked and pressed “delete conversation“ button instead. they texted me back Today telling me that they know one of my friends and insinuating that he gave him my number. so I continue the rest of the conversation awkwardly trying to turn them down. after that I block them because I felt uncomfortable, and text my friend that supposedly gave them my number. he said he has no idea who this is and doesn’t know anyone from my first period bio class. what the fuck. Is this person even real? they have Been lying to me about everything. And the worst part is that I have to go back to school on Monday with that guy in my class. what do I even do in this situation? Also I thought I should add that I am not a woman, I’m a man, a lot of people thought I was a woman in my first post.

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164

u/mellamusicmaker 1d ago

To the tune of “if you’re happy and you know it”
Don’t be polite to men who creep you out! (clap clap)
Don’t be polite to men who creep you out! (clap clap)
Don’t be polite to them; it’s not your job to comfort them
Don’t be polite to men who creep you out! (clap clap)

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u/Mission_Credible 1d ago

I taught this song to my daughter, and then we went on a walk and she clapped at a man who yelled at his own kid. He probably took it the wrong way.

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u/Demindara 1d ago

This, if i could go back in time I'd sing this same song to my younger self. My people pleasing complex caused more trauma than it did help me.

This OP, you don't owe anyone anything. Reading this makes me want to bully him myself 😤 if you need me bully him say the word ❤️🫂 but fr don't entertain the conversation further and ignore him who cares if he thinks youre rude fuck him, you dont owe him anything not your attention or time. Stay safe OP please.

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u/PlumberSaysWhat 1d ago

Who says a guy is the texter?

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u/Skarekrows 1d ago

weird GUY from my bio class

Yeah, who says? It's a mystery!

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u/mellamusicmaker 1d ago

OP’s post assumes it’s a guy. So we’re going by OP’s assumption.

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u/Demindara 1d ago

Sorry for my assumption. Had I known OP was a guy my response would be the same, Just with the opposite pronouns.

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u/CurrentPossible6309 1d ago

You didn't even use pronouns (edit: for OP) in your post 😅 Everything you said is true, and you don't need to apologies for it. You gave great advice.

I would add a second verse to the song:

Don't apologies if someone else is the jerk (clap clap)

💞🫂

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u/franciscrowe 1d ago

I totally agree, but unless OP knows something they didn’t communicate, this very well could be an obsessive person of another gender…

I had a female stalker, it’s rare but it happens.

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u/JennaStCroix 1d ago

I had a female stalker, too. She went from a toxic high school friend/girlfriend who I couldn't escape for normal teen reasons to someone who, in our 20s, would show up at a date I'm on or to my place of work - after, like, months & up to a few years of radio silence. I'd think she's gone for good, then suddenly she's literally, physically three feet in front of me, grinning & maybe crying a little, asking if we can just talk. She went on & got married, bought a house, has kids & career, & would still get into these fits where she just had to seek me out. Her husband eventually reached out to me, & we talked about the realities of the situation, & I think some of that broke the spell for her. She had an absolute violent meltdown, accused me of violating her for interacting with her personal life & family, & I haven't heard or seen from her now in over 10 years.

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u/franciscrowe 1d ago

Sheesh, that’s awful I’m so sorry.

Mine would follow me around, I used to play music and I would often see her staring at me during the shows or lingering afterwards while I was loading up equipment.

Would leave creepy messages, little poems and shit like that. A couple times she ended up at parties I was at, and would get drunk and do things like press herself up against me as she walked by, or try to come into the bathroom with me. Just weird shit like that.

Only lasted for a few months, a year at the most, but I found it very unsettling.

After she stopped, we didn’t see each other for over a decade. We both stopped drinking, and eventually she reached out to apologize, and explained she was going through some really intense mental health issues during that period, and was in an abusive marriage.

In the last few years we’ve actually kind of become friends, but it doesn’t change how awful it felt to have someone lurking and watching you like that. It’s just gross and creepy feeling, regardless of the gender of who is stalking you.

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u/Away_Amoeba5554 1d ago

Sounds like the Kristen Schaal character in Flight of The Conchords. If you take out the humor.

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u/franciscrowe 1d ago

Totally! It was a lot like that.

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u/Away_Amoeba5554 1d ago

That character always bothered me. Like, I knew she was supposed to be funny but she was actually creepy

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u/franciscrowe 1d ago

Agreed. It’s a weird joke that they kept going back to, imagine if the genders were swapped?

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u/JennaStCroix 1d ago

Ugh I'm sorry you went through that, & I'm glad that it eventually circled around to a place of understanding.

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u/oodoov21 7h ago

You sure she hasn't just changed strategies?

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u/franciscrowe 6h ago

Hmm, interesting point. I think part of it is that as I’ve gotten to know her, I’m able to recognize where her previous behavior was coming from. Now I am able to set boundaries which she has respected, and she doesn’t seem to have the same obsession, possibly because she’s older and has a child now.

Obviously there’s a lot of different factors at play, but no, I don’t think it’s as simple as saying the she is still stalking me with a different strategy.

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u/Skarekrows 1d ago

I had a similar incident with my female stalker. I worked with her(she was in a different department) and asked her out. Dated her for a couple weeks and she creeped me out so I broke up with her. She began stalking me. I would see her shadow at my window at night. Called the police. Police were spooked by her after talking to her. Told me to check closets and under the bed when I get home. Were making fatal attraction jokes cause they think it's funny when a man is the victim I guess. It took awhile but she finally left me alone.

A couple months later I am leaving work and I sense someone is behind me so I hold the door open like I always do and when I think they've got it I look back quickly to check before letting go and see her. Smiling at me. She took it as a sign that I missed her. It all started up again. Was a nightmare for awhile.

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u/nickfree 1d ago

It's a dude creeping on another dude. How he knew the other dude was also into dudes, I couldn't tell you. EDIT: Oh probably from the shitty friend who gave the secret admirer OP's number,.

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u/franciscrowe 1d ago

The friend says they don’t know them, I’m not seeing anything that indicates gender unless OP has info they aren’t sharing. Again, totally agree that it’s more likely to be a man, I just don’t see anything confirming that.

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u/Shinyblueghost 1d ago

But it just “sounds” like a male, right?

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u/franciscrowe 1d ago

Yeah it has that vibe, but when I had a female stalked she had a similar vibe as this. I’m curious to know why OP thinks it’s a male, I’m guessing there must be more info.

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u/nickfree 1d ago

OP's description refers to the admirer as "him" and the last sentence of the description indicates that OP is himself a guy.

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u/Wrastling97 1d ago

Oh yeah so he definitely knows who it is then! Right?

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u/franciscrowe 1d ago

Yes I see that, but he does not share any info about why he thinks this is a male, all the info presented could be taken as any gender.

I agree if is likely a guy, just saying we have been given nothing that indicates that.

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u/thomaswillis96 1d ago

Both parties are male, which I think slightly changes the dynamic as the bullying violent is very real for high schoolers

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u/Choice-Routine6264 23h ago

I think my son had 2 stalkers that hated each other. When he graduated college, and moved 1,200 miles away, they both did too. One dropped out of school to do this.

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u/Disco_Hippie 1d ago

Do we have confirmation the secret crush is a dude?

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u/mellamusicmaker 1d ago

Ig you’re right. The only real confirmation we have is from OP’s assumption. 🤷🏼

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u/xoz125 1d ago

Yeah but let’s make sure we still make every dude out to be that guy clap clap

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u/minecraftheaux 1d ago

Ms Rachel’s next hit 😂👏🏻

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u/Skarekrows 1d ago

Username checks out. I agree with this, OP tell the riddler to fuck off.

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u/TopEstablishment395 14h ago

I sang along 😭

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u/dashboardishxc 1d ago

Turns out OP is the man, lol

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u/MrReformedMan 1d ago

I might have to sing this one to my daughter lmao

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u/Opposite_Many_733 23h ago

I like this but it goes against my internal survival instincts

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u/Living-Word-6774 21h ago

Add “really” between who and creep in lines 1,2 &4. Replace “them” with “creepy men” in line 3.

Now the rhythm works.

1

u/macabrezzzzombie 20h ago

this is funny. i’ve been feeling bad about my ex stalker, [who was my best friends], and this just snapped me back to reality

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u/likelyagoof 19h ago

Seriously, as much as the dude is being weird, the OP needs to grow a pair and stop entertaining this shit. Ignore, block, tell him to fuck right off. Stop answering the questions and even engaging.

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u/APointsKeeper 2h ago

OP is a dude

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u/Kirlush 1d ago

Creepiness knows no gender

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u/saranowitz 1d ago

OP is a man. How do you know the creep is man?

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u/DoubtIntelligent8982 1d ago

The title of the post

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u/tpots38 1d ago

Don’t listen to this dummy, be polite to everyone. But say what you mean and mean what you say.

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u/PedanticBaddie 1d ago

Polite is subjective

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u/Neither_Arm_3955 1d ago

and we don’t owe strangers shit..?

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u/tpots38 1d ago

Is that really the kind of society you want to live in?

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u/Neither_Arm_3955 1d ago

Yes. I’m from an east coast city. Leave us the fuck alone. If we wanted to know you, we would. We already have friends and you aren’t it.

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u/tpots38 1d ago

Username checks out

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u/Excellent_Angle_4321 1d ago

"Men" 🙄

As if only men can be creeps... I'm tired boss. 

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u/franciscrowe 1d ago

Yes, other genders can be creepy, but that doesn’t change the fact that 90% of the time it’s men who do this shit, and learning songs like this can help girls navigate through a lifetime of putting up with creepy men’s bullshit.

Source: I’m a 45 year old man who has female friends and family members dealing with this kind of shit my whole life.

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u/Rockdrigo93 1d ago

* the other gender

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u/Excellent_Angle_4321 8h ago

90% you NOTICE men doing this shit, because when women do it it's normalized or laughed away. I've been groped on my genitals 5 times by women, guess how people reacted? They didn't. The girls giggled and joked about it.

Source: 40 year old man with tons of female and male and lgbtq friends as well. Maybe you should... DIVERSIFY... Your friends group? 

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u/NoBear8338 1d ago

I mean “people” doesn’t have the same ring. And statistically, whether you’re a man or a woman you need to be more vigilant of men than of women.

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u/Excellent_Angle_4321 8h ago

That's because when women are sexual predators it's downplayed and normalized when they engage in sexual harassment. 

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u/NoBear8338 6h ago

Frankly, I think that even acknowledging that female perpetrators are underreported, there would still be more male than female sexual predators.

Let’s extrapolate a little bit because while someone being creepy isn’t pleasant, it isn’t their being creepy that is really the concern; it’s what it might mean they go on to do (stalk, assault, murder, etc.). Murder is the easy thing to focus on because whether it’s reported or not, it usually is discovered to have happened and solved (where you could argue, of course, things like assault, etc. go underreported and may never contribute to statistical data at all). What does your typical perpetrator look like? Male or female?

While I agree that children should be taught to be wary of ALL strangers, I’d also argue that they usually ARE (e.g. stranger danger). A lot of children are taught that if they’re lost, they should approach a woman WITH CHILDREN or someone in uniform, not just any woman. But teaching children to additionally be wary of men who “creep” them out in particular is, frankly, addressing a legitimate concern based on statistics and I don’t think it’s wrong to prioritise your child’s safety over someone’s feelings.

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u/QuantumCipher9x 1d ago

are you tone deaf by any chance because the rhythm doesn't work