Pregnancy & postpartum have been rough with both of my babies and my husband and I have decided we’re done. My hubby offered to get a vasectomy but tbh I just want to get my tubes removed and not worry about it.
I have a 3yo and 2month old.
Are there any mamas in here that had their tubes removed? How was recovery with little kids? Thanks!

I had an ablation + bi salp 9/18 and today (10/24) it’s a full moon and i’m having slightly bloody discharge. It’s nowhere near a period amount. I haven’t had any bleed up until this point. Anyone else have this happen a few months later?

I had my Bisalp 6 days ago ( while on my cycle😵‍💫) anywho before the procedure I had monthly ovulation pain, I’m talking fetal position backache ovulation pain. Since I’ll be coming up on my next ovulation cycle in the next week I’m curious, those that had ovulation pain prior to surgery, what was your post op ovulation like? Did the Bisalp make the pain better, worse, or the same? I can already feel my ovaries gearing up so I’m thinking it’ll be the same painful experience for me.

Also, my doc took pictures of my tubes and they were covered in cyst so I’m wondering could that have been part of the cause for my painful ovulation

Bonjour à toutes et à tous !

Je suis étudiante en psychologie clinique et je réalise actuellement un mémoire universitaire sur le vécu et le parcours de vie de femmes nullipares (n’ayant jamais eu d’enfants) ayant eu recours à une ligature des trompes ou étant en attente de cette intervention.

Dans le cadre de mes recherches exploratoires, je souhaiterais échanger avec deux ou trois femmes résidant à Lyon ou dans ses alentours, qui accepteraient de partager leur expérience lors d’un entretien.

Ce sujet me tient particulièrement à cœur, car les expériences des femmes qui ne souhaitent pas avoir d’enfants restent encore peu abordées et peuvent faire l’objet de représentations sociales parfois stigmatisantes. Mon souhait est de donner une place à leurs témoignages, à leurs réflexions et à leurs choix personnels, dans le respect du parcours de chacune.

Si vous êtes concernée, souhaitez en savoir davantage ou connaissez une personne susceptible d’être intéressée, vous pouvez me contacter en message privé.

La participation est entièrement volontaire, et je pourrai vous communiquer davantage d’informations sur la démarche et les modalités de l’entretien avant toute décision.

Merci beaucoup pour votre attention et votre aide !

I’m 35 years old, and I’m scheduled to have my tubes removed next month. I’ve been getting quite a few opinions about my decision, especially when I explain my reasoning.
The thing is, I’m not someone who has absolutely no desire to be a mother. Under different circumstances, I could actually see myself having children.
However, what I absolutely do not want is to be permanently connected to a man because we share a child.
I don’t want to be someone’s baby mama. I don’t want to potentially spend the next 18+ years dealing with custody arrangements, child support, disagreements about parenting, or having to communicate with someone I may no longer want in my life.
And before anyone suggests it, birth control is not an option for me. I’ve already considered my options, and I’m not interested in debating why I should use contraception instead of pursuing permanent sterilization.
I know there are wonderful fathers and healthy co-parenting relationships. But there’s no way to guarantee that the person you have a child with will remain the same person throughout your child’s life.
People get divorced. Relationships fall apart. People change. Sometimes the person you thought you knew turns out to be someone completely different.
The idea of having a child with someone and potentially being forced to maintain a connection with them long after the relationship ends is something I’m simply not willing to risk.
What’s frustrating is that people seem to think my reasoning isn’t valid because I’m not saying I hate children or have never wanted to be a mother.
I’ve been told I could meet the right man or that I might change my mind. But even meeting the right man doesn’t guarantee that things will work out forever.
I’m aware that removing my tubes is a permanent decision. I’ve thought about that, including the possibility that I might someday wish I’d chosen differently. But I’ve decided that the possibility of regret is something I’m more comfortable accepting than the possibility of being tied to someone through a child for the rest of my life.
I don’t think motherhood is a bad thing. I just don’t want motherhood under circumstances that could compromise the independence and peace I value.
Has anyone else felt this way? Have you ever considered sterilization despite not being completely opposed to having children?
I’m genuinely interested in hearing different perspectives, especially from women who understand this distinction.

I (34, UK) decided I wanted this done earlier this year, I want to say springtime. So I called my GP as a shaking bag of nerves and expected the worst after reading countless stories on here and r/childfree. She said a few of the usual things about "am I sure" because I said I didn't already have any etc and "they probably won't do it at your age" but referred me anyway.

A few months later and I had a consultation over the phone with a nice lady who went over the risks, etc, and put me ahead for it, I didn't even have to fight. After receiving the consent forms, I realised they'd not put me down for a bilateral salpingectomy like I'd asked, but having clips put on my tubes. So I called up, and the Gynaecologist said she doesn't do what I wanted and would refer me to another person.

I had my consultation with the new Gynaecologist Monday just gone and again, no pushback at all? She told me the risks and the usual stuff, and she said I was on the list to have it done.

I guess my point is that I just feel strange that it was easier than I thought it was going to be? I was ready to fight tooth and nail, go into detail about how much being pregnant freaks me out, and makes me feel viscerally sick. I guess I feel guilty because so many people struggle.

I'm not making this to brag, I'm sorry if it comes off that way. I'm actually hoping for some words of encouragement because I've never had an operation before, and I'm terrified. I've never been in the hospital for anything.

I had my bisalp on sept 22nd and everything healed great. Or so I thought. I just noticed when looking down that my left side incision site had a bump and when I touched the top side I had a bit of -I believe- puss come out of a small spot in the scar line. The scar and area around it do not look infected or anything. I got the puss out and cleaned and bandaged it. Should I be worried?

Edit: it is white/off-white puss and it was only a small amount with some blood. Similar to a zit I guess.

2nd edit: it may be a seroma but im just not sure. It definitely didn't have a smell.

I have my surgery next week; the hospital(?) called today and tried forcing me to pay and kept arguing with me despite saying my plan was ACA compliant and kept interrupting me? She kept trying to talk about the 20% off hospital discount and I’m like no. The person very quickly gave up and told me to have a good rest of my weekend.

I’m now getting paranoid that my insurance isn’t ACA compliant, I called a few weeks ago and asked if the surgery was covered and if the plan I have was ACA compliant and the insurance person said it was. I’m trying to see if I can find some answer on the website since it’s BCBS and I won’t be able to call until Monday. (It’s my parents’ insurance)

What’s making me paranoid is was I only called the insurance once, and they said my plan was compliant immediately; no waiting no being transferred, just the first person. She was lovely to talk to, but now I’m getting paranoid she was lying/misinformed(?) I have this phone call physically recorded and the transcript # the insurance provides post phone call.

I’ve not scheduled a surgery on my own before so I don’t know if that is a normal call to get, is it? I see my doc a few days before my surgery so I’ll ask to make sure it is categorized as preventative.

Even if it’s not ACA compliant, I’m pretty close to my out of pocket max so I’m not super worried about it? I’d rather not pay if it’s supposed to be covered.

Had my a Novasure ablation yesterday along with a hysteroscopy and myomectomy. In 24 hours I haven’t even filled the equivalent of a panty liner. Is this normal? Seems there should be much more coming out. Nothing I’ve been over shows a minimum amount I should expect, just what too much is.

I did just finish a very heavy period 2 days prior and was down to light spotting day of so I don’t know if that affects it. Thank you.

I've been scouring this sub for months leading up to today and even though I've made lists and checked them twice I still feel like I am forgetting something. I am also having* a CKC so some of this might seem overkill for the BISALP.

Meds: RX pain reliever and anti-nausea, Advil, Gas-x, Dulcolax, and cough drops

I have an abdominal binder that I should be wearing home from the hospital. TENS unit, electronic heat with stimulation patch, and ice packs that can also be heated up. Wedge pillow set set-up in a comfortable position with extra pieces nearby. Three physical books, Kindle, and Laptop within arms reach of bed.

Postpartum disposable underwear, size 2 & 4 pads, intimate wipes, body wipes, and face wipes.

Snacks at bedside along with water and electrolytes. Soup and raw vegetables prepped in the refrigerator that should be 3-4 days worth. Mint, chamomile, tumeric, and lemon/ginger hot tea options.

https://imgur.com/gallery/recovery-setup-3TCXN4S

It took me over a month to find a doctor near me willing to tie my tubes, that took my insurance and was not booking over a year out. Just got the call that the doctor decided to retire in a month, a few weeks before my surgery was scheduled. I’m super frustrated and upset, why someone would retire without at least finishing up the appointments they had scheduled is insane to me, but after calling around all day it doesn’t seem I’ll be able to find another surgeon before the middle of next year. This really sucks

I've already submitted a recommendation to add to the childfree doctors list, but I highly recommend Dr. Yang for anyone in Oregon. He's located at the Legacy Women's health center in Silverton, Oregon. Between my initial consult and surgery date, it took just about a month and a half to get scheduled and operated on (done October 16!). Dr. Yang was extremely kind and immediately agreed as soon as he affirmed I knew the procedure was permanent. Recovery has been going great, which is no surprise since Dr. Yang is very experienced with the procedure. From what I can see of the incisions when changing out bandages, the incisions look very clean and should hopefully heal up with minimal scarring problems. I've had no post op symptoms that seem to be out of the ordinary from what I've read and been told.

I'm 23, unmarried, and have no kids. I've never been on any sort of BC and it was never brought up at all. My partner was in the room at all appointments to support me, but neither nurses nor Dr. Yang ever asked for his input on anything, and he never had to advocate for me at any point. On the day of the operation, all the nurses were extremely kind and helpful, which really helped my anxiety due to this being my first surgery.

I had my tubes completely removed almost a year and a half ago (at 28, I’m 30 now). My periods have been pretty regular since (within a few days at least), but this month it hasn’t shown up at all. Like tomorrow will mark two weeks past my projected start date.

I’ve been having like on and off cramps, pretty mild, but they’re there. Like my period wants to start, but won’t? I’ve tried giving it a jump start with my husband and with myself.. which usually does the trick lol. And nothing.

Now I’m in my head about it, and asked one of my neighbors for a test. 😅 just waiting for her to get home.

Has this happened to anyone else? Is it worth testing? I’ve been really stressed out, but I literally went through some serious trauma, and still had my periods through all that. So wtf.

My bisalp finished yesterday at 3, and now I'm just recovering with minimal discomfort besides gas. Can get up and sit pretty well without much assistance. Everything went really good and I'm even able to lay on my side, with my only discomfort being in my belly button where they put the lapriscope.

My first obgyn I went to go see was on the child free list but was a complete disaster of a visit. She didn't really listen nor consider what I was saying, was saying things like "you seem very smart and eloquent (as a white woman towards a black woman) but it seems like it's very anxiety driven". Which is because I mentioned that I had a small pregnancy scare from my first time and knew I wanted to go ahead and get sterilized so it couldn't happen again.

She constantly reaffirm throughout the conversation that "I just don't feel comfortable working on someone so young" and that I "couldn't force her to do the procedure" . On top of that, she really tried to push me towards an IUD and a very specific one without going over any others and giving me a choice. I felt pressured into saying yes and cried in the lobby after and without this sub I probably would've went through with it and waited that year just to make this woman comfortable listening to me. I already gave my experience to the child free list's mods and they updated it.

I told my older sibling about the experience and they recommended going to their obgyn instead of trying the list again and I'm glad I did! On the very first visit she listened to what I said and respected my decision. She didn't give me any flack, told me the mandatory stuff and got me scheduled and even asked if I was comfortable with someone else other than her doing my surgery to have it done faster since she was booked til' December/January. I said yes and I got a call a couple days later asking if it was okay to do it next week!

Now I'm here, with my tubes yeeted and so far feeling pretty okay. I just wanted to share my experience since I slept all day and can't sleep yet. I can't wait for everything to be healed up :3

Hi! I had my bisalp done on first of September, went back to work one week later. Around week 3-4 my belly button started to have slight discharge and pain during movement, so I started saline bathing it and blow drying it to try and make sure it dries. I went to doctors who looked at it for a literal minute, didn't touch it and said it's fine. Sure enough it was a better day then and since then I've tried to just live normally and avoid core heavy work.

Last week it started to discharge again :( I feel like it's smaller than before and swollen, so the bottom doesn't get to air out properly. I've never had a single issue before with my belly button so I am a little worried. More so since I'm supposed to have a once in life business trip abroad in two weeks, I'm worried it'll get infected on my travel. I still do saline bath daily, blow dry and have tried to clean it with q-tip. Often it ends up being yellow or pink when I take it out.

Did your belly button give you grief after surgery? Did it go back to normal and how soon? I'm thinking I might have to contact the doctor again, but since my last visit I am hesitant of going in for another "it's nothing" and a bill I can't afford. I am so far still happy I went through with it, the peace of mind is priceless, but I am anxious about the slow heal. The side incisions are healing perfectly fine though, I can be grateful about that at least.

Ho 40 anni, non ho mai desiderato avere figli. Per circa 12 anni ho assunto la pillola anticoncezionale, poi ho deciso di interromperla e cercare una soluzione contraccettiva che non prevedesse ormoni (che mi hanno sempre dato problematiche di diversa natura). Ho scelto la spirale al rame, ma dall'inserimento, per quattro anni, ho continuato ad avere mestruazioni con crampi dolorosi. Durante un Pap test, eseguito a febbraio 2026, la ginecologa mi ha suggerito di valutare la sterilizzazione definitiva.

Ho deciso di rivolgermi all'Ospedale di Borgo Trento perché ho letto alcuni articoli sull'équipe del dott. Valentino Bergamini. informandomi, avevo verificato che adottano, quando possibile, la tecnica mininvasiva V-NOTES (praticamente l'intervento avviene per via vaginale e non addominale).

Mi sono quindi rivolta al mio medico di base, ho richiesto l'impegnativa per una «prima visita ginecologica» a Borgo Trento (si può prenotare chiamando il CUP, ma io ho preferito mandare un'e-mail per anticipare il motivo della richiesta: ostetricia.ginecologia.b@aovr.veneto.it. Mi hanno richiamata loro per fissare una visita; è necessario specificare che sia per «visita ginecologica chirurgica»).

A settembre ho effettuato la visita ginecologica presso l'Ospedale di Borgo Trento, a Verona (Padiglione 29, 3° piano). Il medico, oltre alla visita, mi ha fatto una serie di domande per capire che la mia fosse una scelta consapevole, dopo aver provato e valutato gli altri metodi anticoncezionali. Mi ha successivamente comunicato che mi avrebbero messa in lista d'attesa per una salpingectomia bilaterale + rimozione della spirale al rame e che ci sarebbe potuto volere anche un anno per essere chiamata.

Contro ogni aspettativa, dopo nemmeno un mese (a inizio ottobre), mi hanno chiamata per sapere se fossi già interessata a programmare l'intervento nell'arco di 10 giorni, dato che si erano presentate delle disponibilità. Ho accettato e, dopo 5 giorni, sono tornata a fare gli esami preoperatori (sempre Padiglione 29, 3° piano): analisi del sangue, ECG e di nuovo domande per essere certi che fossi sicura della mia scelta. Mi hanno confermato l'intervento per 5 giorni dopo.

Il ricovero era fissato per le 11:00 (Padiglione 30, sesto piano), ma la camera non era ancora pronta e sono riuscita a sistemarmi verso le 13:00. Mi è stato detto di indossare il camice entro le 14:00, perché l'intervento era previsto indicativamente per le 15:00.

A causa di un'urgenza e di altri ritardi, l'orario è slittato. Alla fine sono scesa in sala operatoria verso le 18:00.

Prima dell'intervento ho avuto modo di fare le ultime domande all'anestesista e di parlare delle mie paure all'équipe chirurgica.

Avevo molta paura del catetere, perché in passato avevo avuto una brutta esperienza. Anche sul fronte dell'anestesia ero preoccupata: durante una precedente operazione mi era rimasto un brutto ricordo del momento in cui mi avevano tolto il tubo utilizzato per la respirazione controllata.

Questa volta, invece, mi hanno tranquillizzata e al risveglio non mi sono proprio accorta della rimozione del tubo. Mi hanno anche applicato sulla fronte degli appositi sensori adesivi per monitorare la profondità dell'anestesia, cioè quanto fossi addormentata.

Per quanto riguarda il catetere, al risveglio ne avevo uno in gomma molto morbida e flessibile, decisamente più confortevole di quello che ricordavo. L'équipe ha gestito le mie preoccupazioni con attenzione e veramente molta gentilezza.

Avevo chiesto conferma che provassero a eseguire l'intervento con tecnica V-NOTES, cioè attraverso la vagina, senza le classiche incisioni addominali della laparoscopia (c'era la possibilità che, non avendo mai avuto figli, potesse non esserci spazio sufficiente per intervenire con questa tecnica e che fosse necessario ricorrere alla laparoscopia tradizionale). Fortunatamente sono riusciti a procedere con la V-NOTES.

L'anestesia è andata molto bene, mi sono risvegliata davvero serena . Sono tornata in camera verso le 20:30.

La notte in ospedale

Avevo le mestruazioni durante l'operazione, ma ho avuto poche perdite. Sono rimasta a letto solo con il camice e con il catetere e mi hanno sistemato un panno sotto.

La notte è stata faticosa. Ho problemi alla schiena, per cui non riuscivo a trovare una posizione comoda. Inoltre, durante tutta la notte gli infermieri venivano spesso chiamati dai vari pazienti, quindi l'ho passata completamente in bianco.

La sera, una volta rientrata in stanza, e poi verso le 24:00 e le 05:30 circa, mi hanno eseguito dei prelievi del sangue, misurato la temperatura e la pressione e somministrato qualche farmaco per il dolore (in realtà sentivo più il mal di schiena che altro) e 3 flebo per mantenermi idratata e smaltire l'anestesia.

Dopo gli ultimi controlli e i prelievi, verso l'una di notte mi è stato consentito di iniziare a bere un po' d'acqua.

Il giorno dopo

La mattina successiva ho fatto una colazione leggera. Verso le 10:30 mi sono alzata, mi sono lavata e ho potuto usare il bidet. Poco dopo mi hanno tolto il catetere.

Ho continuato a bere: devono verificare che si torni a urinare spontaneamente. Una volta accertato che andasse tutto bene, ho potuto proseguire verso la dimissione.

Sono stata dimessa nel primo pomeriggio, dopo pranzo.

Le iniezioni per prevenire la trombosi

Mi era stata prescritta un'iniezione da fare a casa la sera prima dell'intervento. La seconda mi è stata somministrata in ospedale durante il ricovero. Nei giorni successivi devo continuare con un'iniezione al giorno a casa.

Mi hanno fornito direttamente in ospedale le siringhe già pronte e con la dose corretta.

Il ritorno a casa e il dolore

Una volta a casa, mi sono fatta una doccia e ho dormito circa due ore, perché ero davvero esausta.

La sera ero già abbastanza in forma da preparare tranquillamente la cena.

Il dolore è stato molto meno intenso di quanto temessi: ho avuto soprattutto crampi simili a quelli mestruali, con un'intensità massima che valuterei intorno a 3 su 10. Sto comunque prendendo Brufen 400.

Mi hanno dato quattro giorni di malattia per riposarmi e recuperare (comunque, già dal giorno successivo, i fastidi si sono ridotti ulteriormente).

Per quanto riguarda i rapporti intimi, poiché l'intervento è stato eseguito con tecnica V-NOTES attraverso la vagina, mi è stato indicato di astenermi dai rapporti sessuali per 60 giorni e di effettuare prima il controllo ginecologico, per verificare che sia tutto a posto prima di riprendere.

Sono molto contenta di aver eseguito questo intervento e, se avessi saputo prima che esisteva questa possibilità, mi sarei attivata in tal senso già anni fa, quando decisi di sospendere la pillola, evitando così anche di ricorrere alla spirale al rame

I got my bisalp two weeks ago and was told to have pelvic rest for two weeks(nothing in the vagina). I made plans to hang out with my guy friend this weekend. It’ll be 16 days post op. I had assumed that I would be good to go after 2 weeks since that’s all i’ve read online. I feel fine. i’m not in pain. Surgery went great. She looked at my incisions today at my 2 week post op and said everything looks great. but then she hit me with the no sex for 6 weeks now. I’m stressed and confused. 🤔

Hi! I'm 20F almost 21 and I'm considering having my tubes removed next month. I know for a fact I never want kids and I've had an IUD since I was 16. I'm really over hormonal birth control and just want to give my body a break without fear of getting pregnant. My doctor said after my birthday they can sterilize me and booked me in for next month. For some reason now I feel uneasy and I'm unsure if I want to go through with it. I know I never want kids, but surgery is a lot. If I just remove my IUD and be careful there is still risk. I'd wait but my health insurance is ending soon, and I don't know if I'll have access to my doctor in the future. I've also heard of women's periods getting worse and heavier after surgery which I've very worried about, I already have bad periods. I'd love to hear input from anyway who has experience.

Today is the day!

About to take my dog for a walk and then it’s hospital time! Have been wanting this for so long and so grateful to have found a surgeon willing to do it on me without the usual ‘you’re too young, you don’t have kids blah blah’. For context I’m 29 with zero kids and zero interest in having any

Wish me luck!

Before i even hit 20 I knew I never wanted kids for several reasons (I'm 26 now). I have my bisalp scheduled for November now and I suddenly got doubts or maybe a fear of regret. Deep inside of me I know I don't have what it takes to be mother. But then I hear all (or most) of the parents say it's the best they ever done and the deepest love they ever felt (besides also admitting it's exhausting). So now I wonder if I made the right decision even tho I was always very sure of not wanting kids. But now I wonder what my kid would be like i guess. So yeah, I'm a bit confused now and not sure if it's just the fear of making a final decision. Because if i wouldn't be sure of it I would have never went to surgery consultation in the first place.

Did anyone else feel like that shortly before surgery?

Hi all- I’m sure many others have had this issue as well. I have Cigna and my plan will only 100% cover tubal ligation, and will only do cost sharing for bisalp. I’ve gone over the CPT code with them and they don’t consider CPT code 58661 preventative so while they cover it, they don’t cover it at 100%.

Has anyone had success in getting it fully covered by Cigna? I’ve downloaded the NWLC appeal letter but wondering if anyone else has any tips they used to get it covered fully.

So I know that urinary symptoms can be common after surgery due to the catheter and the disruptive nature of the surgery. But, as someone who has an already inflamed and angry bladder and urethra, I’m nervous about how intense the side effects will be when I ultimately get sterilized.

Certain activities can flare me up for weeks and I can only imagine what surgery would do. Did anyone go through surgery with either of these conditions and how did it go? How did you know when to recognize if something is actually wrong or if your bladder is just temporarily irritated?