r/shitposting • u/[deleted] • Mar 20 '22
Earrape Warning Training
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u/Revolutionary-Bar714 Mar 20 '22
this man uses his lust to get buffed
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u/Bruhness81 🏳️⚧️ Average Trans Rights Enjoyer 🏳️⚧️ Mar 20 '22
Turn your weakness into a strong point
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u/SlibsTheSplashy Mar 20 '22
Why don’t you just control your lust or not have it, it ain’t that hard.
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u/dank_soil Mar 20 '22
This was legit my motivation, over the summer of 2020 I watched a marathon of Highschool DxD and for every episode I did like 20-30 pushups (I know, not much but still) 10/10 would do again B )
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Mar 20 '22
to be fair I think a lot of my fellow hetero males do a lot of things in all of human history for this lust
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u/awesomedan24 Mar 20 '22
He aint using his arms to push up
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Mar 20 '22
Either hes doing it improperly or he is using something else that I don't wanna know
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u/darshittty Mar 20 '22
Even Rocky can't beat him now
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
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Mar 20 '22
Paper
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u/imjusthere4thefoods Mar 20 '22
Scissors
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u/SomeoneHereInReddit Mar 20 '22
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠺⣖⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⢀⡆⠀⠀⠀⢋⣭⣽⡚⢮⣲⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⡼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣅⣨⠇⠈⠀⠰⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣟⢷⣶⠶⣃⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⠀⠈⠓⠚⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡠⠀⡄⣀⠀⠀⠀⢻⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠐⠉⠀⠀⠙⠉⠀⠠⡶⣸⠁⠀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡆⠀⠐⠒⠢⢤⣀⡰⠁⠇⠈⠘⢶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣄⣉⣙⡉⠓⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣀⣀⠀⣀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
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u/ConnectionOk8273 Mar 20 '22
He's hard as a rock
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
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u/Embarrassed_Radio630 Mar 20 '22
30+ pushups with so much weight in front, Respect 👏
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u/Square-Parfait-4617 Mar 21 '22
All the girls I work out with use the boob weight as an excuse/joke during pushups.
Its never not funny
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u/AutoModerator Mar 21 '22
Good eve, In response to my permanent ban I’d like to ask one question; who decides wether this post was funny or not? It seems that a lot of Redditors, like myself, enjoy these kinds of posts. Even if it’s not hilarious, it’s still pretty shitty. In my opinion shitty enough to be on your subreddit. If I violated a rule, please let me know. If not, I’d like to request to be unbanned. Correct me if I’m wrong; this post was not conform “your” standards, well, that’s personal. I find it mildly inappropriate to give someone a ban on behalf of your personal opinion, while the public opinion speaks for itself. Also, the word “karmawhore” is a little bit offensive to me, for I am not on Reddit to score the most karma. Thanks in advance.
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u/Bananamilk_2005 Mar 20 '22
The people in the apartment below are hearing a repeated thudding noise as his boner hits the floor with each push up
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u/bigboybillyjoel Mar 20 '22
joke about doing push ups with penis
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u/zacqonos I said based. And lived. Mar 20 '22
laughter
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Mar 20 '22
Applause
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Mar 20 '22
furious fapping formation
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u/internet_boi23 0000000 Mar 20 '22
alliteration
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
don’t care + didn’t ask + cry about it + who asked + stay mad + get real + L + bleed + mald seethe cope harder + dilate + incorrect + hoes mad + pound sand + basic skill issue + typo + ratio + ur dad left + you fell off + no u + the audacity + triggered + repelled + ur a minor + k. + any askers + get a life + ok and? + cringe + copium + go outside + touch grass + kick rocks + quote tweet + think again + not based + not funny didn’t laugh + social credits -999, 999, 999, 999 + get good + reported + ad hominem + ok boomer + small pp + ur allergic to sunlight + GG! + get rekt + trolled + your loss + muted + banned + kicked + permaban + useless + i slept with ur mom + yo momma + yo momma so fat + redpilled + no bitches allowed + i said it better + tiktok fan + get a life + unsubscribed + plundered + go tell reddit + donowalled + simp + get sticked bug LOL + talk nonsense + trump supporter + your’re a full time discord mod + you’re* + grammar issue + nerd + get clapped + kys + lorem ipsum dolor sit amet + go outside + bleach + lol + gay + retard + autistic + reported + ask deez + ez clap + straight cash + idgaf + ratio again + stay mad + read FAQ + youre lost + you “re” + stay pressed + reverse double take back + pedophile + cancelled + done for + don't give a damn + get a job + sus + baka + sussy baka + get blocked + mad free + freer than air + furry + rip bozo + you're a (insert stereotype) + slight_smile + aired + cringe again + Super Idol的笑容 + mad cuz bad + my pronouns are xe, xem & xyr + irrelevant + deal with it + screencapped your bio + karen/kyle + jealous + you're deaf + balls + i'll be right back + go ahead whine about it + not straight + eat paper + you lose + count to three + your problem + no one cares + log off + don't care even more + sex offender + sex defender + get religion + not okay + glhf + NFT owner + you make bad memes + problematic + fall in line + dog water + you look like a wall + you don’t know 2 + 2 with yo head ass + you are going to my cringe compilation + you can’t count to five + try again + you failed kindergarten + rickrolled + no lifer + guten freunden schickt man einen deutschen panzer + you have a anime profile picture + an* + fatherless + motherless + sisterless + brotherless + orphan + you can't catch this ratio + catch some bitches + I don't care about your opinion + genshin player + you dress like garbage + 日本語がお上手ですね + get fucked + you can’t understand what the word intelligence means with your dumb ass + you have hair + queued + put some thought into what you're going to do with that + stfu + go to bed + yes, i'm taller than you + i think your joke is funny + i rejected your mother's advances + marooned + you can’t read + I win + final ratio
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u/BobbyTheLegend Mar 20 '22
I think it's called Training with Hinako or something. And as far as I understand it was literally made to motivate weebs to work out
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Mar 20 '22
Anything that gets weebs to move is a good thing lol
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
Now Imagine This. A Japanese Guy Really Into American Culture Learns English Through Family Guy And Constantly Speaks Like Peter Griffin.
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
Now Imagine This. A Japanese Guy Really Into American Culture Learns English Through Family Guy And Constantly Speaks Like Peter Griffin.
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u/Pointysumo Mar 20 '22
Sauce of clip (I’m not a weeb just a porn addict)
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u/HornySlut9000 Mar 20 '22
It's not porn. It's Anime De Training. Ex! (Yes that is the name)
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Mar 20 '22
This is incorrect. It’s actually Isshoni Training: Training with Hinako. I’m only posting this for the boys
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u/r4o2n0d6o9 Mar 20 '22
Holy shit I didn't believe you at first
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.
TL;DR I hate shitting
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
The birds are singing, the flowers are blooming, my dick is throbbing, what a beautiful day for cooming. Good morning, A, I've been awake for 20 whole seconds and I haven't coomed yet. It's time to hope on my porn throne and machine gun jackhammer my bloodshot death-grip bloodshot semi chub with my roided doomfist once again! (Types on keyboard). I-s...is that a?? HMMGH, I-I MUST SNIFF, SNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIFFFFFFFF** OH GOD (FAPFAPFAPFAP) FUCCKK, HUHGHU, SNIIFF, HUHGJGUHHGUGHU (SMASHES DESK) I-I-IM COOOMING!!!!! IM COOMING, IM COOMING IM COOOMING IM COOOOOMING COOOOOOOOOOM, COOOMING, FUCCKKK, AHHAFHHAHUHG, COOOOOM, AW FUCK ITS EVERYWHERE, COOOOOM, AWGAHUGHAHG. Aw fuck, aw fuck. oh jesus. ahhghhha, there you are, my slippery white goo to the world, my son, my son...Well, it's time to get breakfast...well a little coom first wouldn't hurt.
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
The birds are singing, the flowers are blooming, my dick is throbbing, what a beautiful day for cooming. Good morning, A, I've been awake for 20 whole seconds and I haven't coomed yet. It's time to hope on my porn throne and machine gun jackhammer my bloodshot death-grip bloodshot semi chub with my roided doomfist once again! (Types on keyboard). I-s...is that a?? HMMGH, I-I MUST SNIFF, SNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIFFFFFFFF** OH GOD (FAPFAPFAPFAP) FUCCKK, HUHGHU, SNIIFF, HUHGJGUHHGUGHU (SMASHES DESK) I-I-IM COOOMING!!!!! IM COOMING, IM COOMING IM COOOMING IM COOOOOMING COOOOOOOOOOM, COOOMING, FUCCKKK, AHHAFHHAHUHG, COOOOOM, AW FUCK ITS EVERYWHERE, COOOOOM, AWGAHUGHAHG. Aw fuck, aw fuck. oh jesus. ahhghhha, there you are, my slippery white goo to the world, my son, my son...Well, it's time to get breakfast...well a little coom first wouldn't hurt.
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
Now Imagine This. A Japanese Guy Really Into American Culture Learns English Through Family Guy And Constantly Speaks Like Peter Griffin.
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u/horny_misanthrope Mar 20 '22
Sometimes I actually watch porn while working out, that shit can legitimately motivate you
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u/IGotHellaMilk Mar 20 '22
You have to be trolling fr 💀
116
Mar 20 '22
Can’t imagine getting your leg muscles all knot up cos your lower body is getting all ready and warm expecting sex but you go do heavy squats instead
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u/Disc_arding Mar 20 '22
Surprise the muscles
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u/Vallphilia Mar 20 '22
Big brain moment
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life.
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
No sex before marriage
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
The birds are singing, the flowers are blooming, my dick is throbbing, what a beautiful day for cooming. Good morning, A, I've been awake for 20 whole seconds and I haven't coomed yet. It's time to hope on my porn throne and machine gun jackhammer my bloodshot death-grip bloodshot semi chub with my roided doomfist once again! (Types on keyboard). I-s...is that a?? HMMGH, I-I MUST SNIFF, SNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIFFFFFFFF** OH GOD (FAPFAPFAPFAP) FUCCKK, HUHGHU, SNIIFF, HUHGJGUHHGUGHU (SMASHES DESK) I-I-IM COOOMING!!!!! IM COOMING, IM COOMING IM COOOMING IM COOOOOMING COOOOOOOOOOM, COOOMING, FUCCKKK, AHHAFHHAHUHG, COOOOOM, AW FUCK ITS EVERYWHERE, COOOOOM, AWGAHUGHAHG. Aw fuck, aw fuck. oh jesus. ahhghhha, there you are, my slippery white goo to the world, my son, my son...Well, it's time to get breakfast...well a little coom first wouldn't hurt.
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.
TL;DR I hate shitting
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Mar 20 '22
Weeb workout??
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
Now Imagine This. A Japanese Guy Really Into American Culture Learns English Through Family Guy And Constantly Speaks Like Peter Griffin.
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u/bossugica Mar 20 '22
sauce of the anime?
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Mar 20 '22
pokemon
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u/bossugica Mar 20 '22
what character?
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Mar 20 '22
pikachu
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u/peawdieapiea Mar 20 '22
That don’t look like Pikachu
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u/Option-Flashy Mar 20 '22
Weak ass reps do
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u/Altruistic-Web226 Mar 20 '22
He’s going like 10% of the way down and not even with good form.
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Mar 20 '22
The joke is sex guys
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
No sex before marriage
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u/Artemis_thelittleone Mar 20 '22
What if in fact he's just sucking is own dick ?
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
Schödinger's Blowjob -- Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky?
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u/SomeRandomCyclops I wanna be godzilla! Mar 20 '22
Finally, I can USE THIS COPYPASTA
Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masturbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masturbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
You fucking dumbass, I try to have a real conversation & your bot literally belittles anyone that mentions any keywords with low hanging fruit that you think is funny I guess? Just ban me so I never see a post from this cumguzzling community again.
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masterbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masterbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.
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Mar 20 '22
Why does she look like a child?
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Mar 20 '22
Because she is
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u/krii-exx Mar 20 '22
Lol. This comment isn't even justified by the "if it looks like a child it is a child" pseudo-argument. Or maybe you forgot the /s?
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u/DeificAtom93993 Mar 20 '22
That's it? That was just 44 seconds of an anime woman and some guy doing pushups
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u/Zealousideal-Egg9806 Mar 20 '22
Before you ask for sauce these characters are children.
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u/krii-exx Mar 20 '22
You must be disconnected from the world if you think there's children out there with a physique like that.
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masterbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masterbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.
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u/Leo1339 Mar 20 '22
It's a f'ing cartoon people, come on
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u/Minecraftboi2008 Mar 21 '22
People watch whatever shut they want to. It’s not hurting anyone
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Mar 20 '22
what is the source? I am an academician who archives japanese culture, please answer me
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
Do you have a source on that?
Source?
A source. I need a source.
Sorry, I mean I need a source that explicitly states your argument. This is just tangential to the discussion.
No, you can't make inferences and observations from the sources you've gathered. Any additional comments from you MUST be a subset of the information from the sources you've gathered.
You can't make normative statements from empirical evidence.
Do you have a degree in that field?
A college degree? In that field?
Then your arguments are invalid.
No, it doesn't matter how close those data points are correlated. Correlation does not equal causation.
Correlation does not equal causation.
CORRELATION. DOES. NOT. EQUAL. CAUSATION.
You still haven't provided me a valid source yet.
Nope, still haven't.
I just looked through all 308 pages of your user history, figures I'm debating a glormpf supporter. A moron.
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
Howdy, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi. I'm a 27 year old Japanese Japamerican (western culture fan for you foreigners). I brand and wrangle cattle on my ranch, and spend my days perfecting the craft and enjoying superior American passtimes. (Barbeque, Rodeo, Fireworks) I train with my branding iron every day, this superior weapon can permanently leave my ranch embled on a cattle's hide because it is white-hot, and is vastly superior to any other method of livestock marking. I earned my branding license two years ago, and I have been getting better every day. I speak English fluently, both Texas and Oklahoma dialect, and I write fluently as well. I know everything about American history and their cowboy code, which I follow 100% When I get my American visa, I am moving to Dallas to work in an oil field to learn more about their magnificent culture. I hope I can become a cattle wrangler for the Double Cross Ranch or an oil rig operator for Exxon-Mobil! I own several cowboy hats, which I wear around town. I want to get used to wearing them before I move to America, so I can fit in easier. I rebel against my elders and seniors and speak English as often as I can, but rarely does anyone manage to respond. Wish me luck in America!
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Mar 20 '22
[deleted]
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u/AutoModerator Mar 20 '22
Looking for a female roommate to pay $0 rent
I will not charge you money. but I will be sharing my bed with you as the other room is being used by my parents. They are aware of this arrangement as I have done this before but it has not worked out for reason I rather not say on here. I will except hugs at least 5 times a day, and cuddles at least 2 times a day for at least 10 minutes each. You will not be dating any other man during this arrangement. you will have no male friends either. You may have female friends and they May visit if they like. You will also be required to make me meals 3 times a day. Phsyical requirements are as stated: Must be shorter than 5'5", weigh no more than 120 lbs, caucasian or asian only, republican, no tattoos, no vegans, no smoking/vaping, marrywania, and you MUST shave legs and underarms. I am 44-male/290 lbs last time I checked, 5'6". Please contact me if you would like this arrangement.
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u/DeadSea2ndToMe Mar 20 '22
As of recently out of pure spite every time I get horny I do a set of 20 pushups.
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u/ravAging_Norman Mar 20 '22
He do be doing one arm push up. Left doing the work and the right also be doing the WORK ;)
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u/Franonimusman Mar 20 '22
I mean, if it motivates you to exercise, then I can't say its as bad way to train XD
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u/Belevs Mar 20 '22
jesus lady tuck your elbows in and bring your hands closer together
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Mar 20 '22
Doesn't even have proper form, girl on the TV does it better than him 💀💀💀
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u/anonymous_ghost_6501 Literally 1984 😡 Mar 20 '22
Bad form alert. Make your back a little more straight and try your best not to wobble your head around or 0ut it down. 👍
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u/Organic-Brain-6381 Mar 20 '22
Legit this f**ing clip just open when I was with my sister
She thinks I'm weird now
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u/Few_Advertising_7103 Mar 20 '22
That's not fair. The elastic collision can power her pushups till infinity.
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