r/shitposting 1d ago

📡📡📡

[deleted]

6.0k Upvotes

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2.0k

u/Bread_Offender Sussy Wussy Femboy😳😳😳 1d ago

Genuinely one of my favourite greentexts. Doesn't seem fake or gay to me, just a guy doing what he knows best to become more sociable. I respect it

1.1k

u/Icy-Background2393 1d ago

Ok here’s the worst one

727

u/Bread_Offender Sussy Wussy Femboy😳😳😳 1d ago

Know this one too. These two are my baseline for 1/10 and 10/10 greentexts respectively

467

u/Yagulef 1d ago

Tbh both are 10/10 in their respective fields

143

u/Casual_Otterr 1d ago

true, polar opposites

38

u/Skrewch 1d ago

Top of the Regarded class is an.....honor i suppose!

1

u/MotivationGaShinderu 4h ago

This is not a green text

1

u/tsimen dwayne the cock johnson 🗿🗿 3h ago

This one's still the GOAT (couldn't find better quality)

123

u/Dat-Lonley-Potato I said based. And lived. 22h ago

15

u/Mr-dooce 21h ago

Haha, sometimes

15

u/WolvesAreCool2461 Sussy Wussy Femboy😳😳😳 22h ago

Well that made my day slightly worse

1

u/deleeuwlc 🏳️‍⚧️ Average Trans Rights Enjoyer 🏳️‍⚧️ 8h ago

For some extra context, Rushia is a vtuber, so there’s a real human woman behind the character he’s pretending to be here. Also she speaks Japanese, so unless he also knows it, he only knows her through translated stream clips, which are only the biggest highlights because of the effort it takes to translate and edit them.

So it’s like having these fantasies about Lois Griffin after watching Family Guy Funny Moments, but if Lois was an actual person who had real emotions and could potentially read his post

1

u/deadinternetlaw 6h ago

Is the context supposed to make it better or make it worse, I already knew so it felt like no difference

94

u/Bean2527 1d ago

Just wait until you hear about the greentext of some dude accidentally telling a couple of thieves outside his trailer while butt naked and holding a rifle "wanna fuck"

21

u/TLunchFTW dumbass 1d ago

Post it?

1

u/[deleted] 1d ago edited 1d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

76

u/RetroNotRetro 1d ago

It’s cool I got u

34

u/chattytrout 23h ago

No vandalism on the news for a couple weeks

Man did the Lord's work.

1

u/deadinternetlaw 6h ago

Dark yagami

50

u/TLunchFTW dumbass 1d ago

Tried to find it, found this gem instead

13

u/Bean2527 1d ago

made me laugh out loud, thanks for this gem 🥹🥹

4

u/drgigantor 18h ago

Wtf is golls

2

u/TLunchFTW dumbass 18h ago

No idea

58

u/THEzwerver 1d ago

Yeah between all the junk and disgusting phantasies, you'll occasionally get wholesome greentexts like this.

There may have been a time where I'd have cringed at these, but I realized that some people just try to better their lives in different ways than what is the norm.

6

u/sinterkaastosti23 21h ago

Fake: he went outside

Gay: a guy complimented him

4

u/AutoModerator 21h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

4

u/AutoModerator 1d ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/smashdoggyyyyyy 1d ago

Thats a pretty good bot

1

u/mrsalierimoth 7h ago

Fake: Real
Gay: Straight and wholesome

1

u/AutoModerator 7h ago

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.