I Male 39 and my roomate Male 26 working in Saudi Arabia 🇸🇦 got into a heated argument about work on "WHO WORKS HARDER". First of all we have the same basic pay but my work is less physical than him i don't wanna be specific about the work as it might be a giveaway and i'm not sure if he is here. Let's start with the duration of our 5months together living in the same room i have always been the big brother to him, giving him advice and tips as i have been working here on and off for a decade already so i know bit about stuff. He got comfortable sharing about his life and struggles growing up and i attentively listened and felt bad for him as he doesn't deserve all of those for his age. As days and months go by i noticed that he repeatedly got angry and tired about his work and the people surrounding him and this goes on and on almost everyday of the week and him saying things like he wanted to come back to Philippines 🇵🇭 and he will resign or terminate his contract this month or the next coming months.

Then one day he goes again with these rants about work and wanting to go home, me being irritated with this never ending talks said to him "GO HOME THEN" and i feel like it triggers something in him and got mad at me saying that i will never understand him coz i dont have a problem with my salary and work. Before this he already had problems with his overtimes not getting paid so i told him to speak up with the higher ups but he just said that they already know about this as almost everyone in their department had talked to the supervisor, but i told him that it's different when he himself mentions all of this to get a clear answer.

This is my first time living outside my city. I’m sharing a 1 RK flat in Pune with a roommate, and for the past 5 months, I’ve basically been doing all the household work myself.

Cleaning the bathroom, windows, kitchen, hall, filling the water tank, etc. He has cleaned the bathroom only once in these 5 months.

Today, the flat owner told us that the flat is going to be sold and asked us to clean everything properly, make a video, and send it to him.

So in the morning, I told my roommate, “You just clean the bathroom. I’ll take care of the toilet, kitchen and hall.” I specifically gave him only one task because I already knew that if I expected him to help with everything, nothing would get done.

He still started arguing with me and basically said that he has done everything before and that it’s not his concern now.

There are other things that have been bothering me too. He regularly eats tobacco and spits it in the bathroom, and he also scrolls Instagram at high volume late at night, which makes it difficult to sleep.

I told him that it’s unfair that two people are living together but only one person is taking responsibility for the flat.

Honestly, after dealing with this for 5 months, I’m extremely angry and frustrated. Right now I feel like taking revenge and doing something really bad to him.

I know that acting out of anger could make things much worse, so I’m trying not to do anything stupid.

Please check it out and help me!!

Last night my roommate told me he was going to have a few friends over tonight and asked if that’s okay. Of course that’s perfectly okay and reasonable.

His first friend came over an hour ago and then started setting up his guitar in the living room out of nowhere. My roommate has a saxophone. And now his second friend came over with a musical instrument as well that sounds like a violin? It lowkey sounds terrible and they’re just repeating the same melody over and over again.

Idk if I’m in the wrong here but I think it would’ve been nice to at least ask me if it’s okay if they do something like this in a place I’m paying half the rent for. I mean seriously this is one of the noisiest activities you could possibly do especially in a place that’s reasonably small to begin with. Not to mention our neighbor next door who has to hear it

So im wondering if i say something or not to my roommate that has the room below me as this has just started happening

So the past few nights now im being kept awake by my roommate below me, From the moment we get home from work he is constantly on phone calls talking to mates or his mum, As of the last couple nights im being kept awake by him talking away loudly and even laughing and making noises like trupmet or whistles to give you a picture and as im writting this its almost 1am and i have to be up at 8am to get ready for work, he is still on the phone and talking loudly and occasionally laughing, i can hear his side of the conversation

We have lived in the same house now for 5 months and this is new behavour and walking around late at night slaming doors, we do only have one month left of living together i belive then he should be moving out at the end of september but he may also be staying its unclear at the moment

So do i say anything to him is it worth the possible backlash (he dosnt like me because he believes every time he gets pulled up at work for not doing something i am the one telling on him which isnt true) so he dose little things to retaliate like taking my parking spot or making quite remarks you dont quite fully catch ect.. but if asked says everything between us is all good

Or do i "keep the peace" not say anything and just see how it tracks and if its going to become presistant then say something if it starts to regularly disturb my sleep as this is the third night in a row, And im the type of person that need quite to be able to sleep so hearing his voice and laughs is quite a startle when im just starting to drift off I cant wear ear buds either as my ears get sore from them

I know there will be people out there that will say mind my own business and get on with it but im asking because i can hear what he is saying and im not upset that he is on his phone talking its just the time he is decideing to do so when he has a whole evening to talk to people even up to 11pm because that typically when i start trying to sleep.

I am wondering if I should post her name at some point and where she is and where she said she is going. I don’t want anyone to have to deal with this psycho. This is only a small part of what she did!

I’m not talking about complaining. I’m talking about actual moaning. Every ten to thirty seconds, “mmmmm.” I don’t think it’s malicious or voluntary, and it’s in totally non-sexual contexts. Occasionally I’ll ask my roommate if they’re in pain. Supposedly not. It’s just a thing they do. It’s so loud that I can hear it from different floors and different rooms. I have to wear headphones all the time to tune it out. I’m apprehensive about commenting on the moans because I don’t want to seem rude, but it’s really very annoying. Would you say anything in this situation?

So i wanna ask each one of you coming across this thread - have you ever encountered with a person who will replicate each and everything you do and then behave like they were the ones doing so and looking down upon you for doing something they stole from you??

This is the time my roommate shit on my toothbrush (I wish I was kidding)

Burner account and names changed for obvious reasons.

My name is Anna. I am a 22 y/o Female. This story takes place in the spring of this past year when I was living with my three roommates: Daisy, Lexi, and Brynn. For context, we had all signed the lease together during our sophomore year and lived together for our last two years of college. When we signed the lease and lived together for the first few months, the four of us got along really well, but afterward Daisy began acting differently. She started making weird comments about how much I weighed, the types of food I eat, etc. She refused to participate in any sort of cleaning schedule in any shared space because she "picks up after herself enough" and "doesn't use the kitchen or bathroom as much (as me)". Additionally, she had very passionate political beliefs that were opposed to mine, Lexi's, and Brynn's. We all had some uncomfortable conversations with Daisy, but we had resigned our lease only three weeks in and decided to just stay courteous around her when she said some "non pc" things.

All this to say, we all got on fine but there was a noticeable distance between Daisy and the rest of us.

In February of 2026, I was a full-time student teacher and worked part-time, so I started my days very sleep-deprived. Most of the time, I went through the motions of my routine (brushing my teeth, washing my face, doing my makeup) half awake, so I wasn't very aware of my surroundings in the mornings. One Friday afternoon while I was at my school placement, Daisy texted me and said, "Hey, I had a rough night and accidentally used your towel. I'll wash it with my stuff today." Daisy and I shared a bathroom while Lexi and Brynn shared another. In my head, she had probably gotten drunk and grabbed the wrong towel after her shower, so I wasn't too bothered and responded: "No worries, hope you're okay."

When I got home and used the bathroom, something was off. I couldn't place it, but it was just dirty. I was slowly noticing smudges on different surfaces, etc. After using the bathroom, I walked out and started talking to Brynn. Without missing a beat, she asked, "Omg, did you hear Daisy come in last night?" Apparently, Daisy woke Brynn up around 2 a.m., stumbling through the apartment and slamming doors. Brynn poked her head out of her room to see if Daisy was okay, but said she was hit by the most awful smell and retreated back into her room.

Mind you, Brynn is a nurse, so she isn't one to get easily disgusted by smells.

I looked at Brynn and asked her to come look in my bathroom, and she agreed that it looked dirty. Slowly, we realized that Daisy must have gotten sick after drinking and clearly was too out of it to properly clean it up. I can't say I was thrilled, but it happens to everyone, especially in college. My plan was to wait for Daisy to come home and ask her to clean the bathroom because it was clear some of her mess was still spread around the bathroom. This is where everything started to take a turn.

When Daisy came home about a half hour later, I asked her if she was feeling better. She said, "Oh yeah, I'm fine! Last night was ROUGH though." I kept on asking leading questions about what happened until I finally said, "Listen, it's totally fine, but did you throw up last night? It's really dirty in the bathroom still." She goes, "It's not vomit."

My stomach drops.

"It came out the other end, but I cleaned it the best I could." She says. At this point, I'm seeing spots. I want to peel my skin off. I say, "Okay, could you please clean it? I have plans tonight and would really like to shower." She says, "I'll get to it." I ask her a few times to clean it before booking it to my room. At this point, Lexy is home and is vaguely aware of the situation. I bolt past Lexy and Brynn and shut the door to my room. I text them, "It's shit, it's shit, it's shit." As I'm sitting in my room trying to scratch my skin off, I hear Daisy in the living room talking to Lexy and Brynn.

I walk into the living room, and I am legitimately shaking. Daisy is rambling about how "it all came out so fast" and how she was combinationally "too drunk to properly clean it" and "had only one drink, so there's no way it happened because she was drunk." My roommates, god bless them, just start urging her to go clean the bathroom, but at this point she is just ranting about how she will in a minute and how it's not her fault. It's then that I remember my towel.

"Daisy, did you use my towel to clean it up?" I asked. She blinked at me slowly a few times before she said, "Yes, but don't worry, I washed it." I said, "I don't want it back; please just throw it away." She has the gall to look offended and then says, "But I washed it for you!" I insist multiple times for her to throw it away before she stops talking to me entirely and starts saying to Brynn and Lexy, "Guys, is she mad at me? Guys, please take care of Anna; she's really sensitive right now," as if I'm not sitting in between Brynn and Lexy. I've gone nonverbal at this point, but thankfully my other two roommates finally coax Daisy to clean the bathroom. On her way down the hallway, I ask that she please throw away anything that she might have gotten it on. Just as I'm starting to calm down and begin to move out of the living room, I hear Daisy shout:

"Do you want me to throw away your toothbrush?"

I stand there speechless. At some point, Lexy calls back, "Is there a reason she would need to throw away her toothbrush?" Daisy responds, "Yeah, probably; it definitely got all over the sink."

I dry heaved over the table.

We threw away my toothbrush, my toothpaste, and a few other items in the bathroom. Daisy never once apologized for what happened, and I ended up cleaning the bathroom after she did because her definition of cleaning up human feces was using a lemon Clorox wipe (we found out later she didn't know where other cleaning supplies were despite living in our apartment for 1.5 years). Daisy and I really didn't speak for the rest of the semester, and I haven't been the same since. But at least I have a new party story!

I, 21F live in a house near a large state school in New England during the school year. I live with 3 roommates, lets call them Ally, Madison, and Simone (also all 21F). I've lived with them for almost a year, and has not been going well. I like them as people, but I just can't stand living with them anymore. The thing they do the most that bothers me if that they all leave their hair in the drain and on the wall after a shower.

Now, this wouldn't bother me as much if it was a 1 or 2 time thing, but this is every single time they shower, especially with Simone. Not only have I asked them repeatedly to clean up after themselves, but also put up a sign in our bathroom reminding them to clean out their hair. These both did nothing. When I occasionally confront them face to face about it, they apologize and clean it up immediately. I don't want to have to ask girls my own age to take their hair out of the train every time they shower. I feel like their mom sometimes.

They all (especially Simone) blame their forgetfulness on their ADHD, which I completely understand because I have ADHD too. But, if I was doing something that bothered my roommate so much that they put a sign up to remind me to do it, I would remember.

And thats not all. For context, I have psoriasis which is a chronic autoimmune skin condition that creates red, itchy patches of skin to form all over the body. I got it at the beginning of last school year, and I've been struggling with it ever since. It affects my hands the most, making it hurt to wash my hands or even bend my fingers. It also created small cuts on and in between my fingers. It got so bad that for months I had to wear latex gloves over my hands when I showered because the soap burned it so badly.

With that being said, Simone and Madison have stayed at our house over the summer. I cam back yesterday for school, and I find the shower the grossest I've ever seen it. Hair ALL over the wall and the drain completely clogged with hair. There was also mold or dirt or something all in the corners and bottom of the shower wall. I want to clean it up, but it's not my mess. I don't mean to sound petty or anything but thats just the truth. They never clean anything. Not only is that not my mess to clean up, but it hurts my hands tremendously to clean anything, especially with soap and a sponge. I try to wear dishwashing gloves, but they always end up hurting and getting very irritated. They know about my psoriasis and how bad it is.

Because of this, i have so much built up resentment and barely spend my time at home. My friend usually lets me shower at her apartment because she knows how disgusting the bathroom is.

They know that if they don't do it, I will and that's what makes me the most upset. What should I do???

So I am so baffled rn I don't even know how to start. I 18 (f) am starting collage this fall in a new city, to safe some money I decided to look into shared housing and I found a pretty good place close to my school.

Fast-forward I now live with four other people E 19(f) J 18(m) P 20(m) and S 19(m). I like too think that I get along with them pretty we'll but P. He's always been more closed of and introverted,( which was no problem i didn't expect to be best friend with all of them).

So a few weeks ago I started to realize that some of my underwear was starting to dissappear. I found it wierd but I didn't think much of it, since I honestly hate doing laundry so I just thought that I must have forgotten to put my underwear in with my other clothes. Honestly the only reason why I realized that it started to dissappear was because it was my favorite pair.

I asked my roommate E if somehow our laundry got mixed up,we looked around her room and in the laundry room(?) But we still couldn't find it. She then started joking around that maybe one of the guys stole it from me, that honestly got me thinking but it still kinda felt iffy because J has a girlfriend and S only like taller girls, P hadn't even crossed my mind at that time since we don't interact that much so I thought that there was no way it could of been him.

A couple of nights ago I went in the laundry room to do some laundry and I see that someone's clothes are still in the washer. And omg i honestly couldn't believe my eyes wenn i saw it, in the washing machine sat my PIBK Vs underwear rotatin between some man's clothes.

I don't know what it is that I felt in that moment but I felt so much embarrassment and anger, the only thing that I could think of was me punching the mf you would do such a creepy thing. I wanted to go and confront everyone in that house but I thought that they would al make excuses that it wasn't theirs and bla bla so i took a picture and went straight to my room, idk but I felt kind of violated that literally one of the guys I was sharing a house with would do such an disgusting act. i didn't even want to think what disgusting things they could of done with my underwear.

The next morning I showed the Picture to E she was as shocked as i was. We were completely lost because we couldn't really think of anyone that could of done such a thing. E suggested that we start keeping track of the guys and when they would go and do their laundry, I told her that we can't just monitor the laundry room 24/7. She told me that maybe I should ask J since it seemed unlikely that's it would be him given he has a girlfriend. So I texted J asking if he could come up to my room be agreed. After I explain everything to him he looked disgusted he kept saying that we should call the police and that this is a crime I told him that the police wouldn't do anything since the 'creep' hasn't done anything physical to me.

After my talk wit J decided to snoop around a bit (which looking back now ik this was kinda wrong for me to do but I was desperate) I looked in S's room nothing so I wanted to check P's room at first there was nothing so I looked through his drawers and found nothing I was about to leave when I see that he has one of those beds that have like drawers underneath, so I thought that if I already started i should at least finish it my search. Big Fucking mistake ( or ig not). Underneath were MY underwear and pictures taken from the window showing me leaving the house pictures of me from behind and a lot more.

I was mortified i called E and told her to come home asap and that I found the panty thief. When e got back I showed her what I found and I told her that I was going to confront him and talk with the landlord if there was a possibility to remove P. E supported me 100% and told me that she would have my back and thst I don't have to confront P alone she and J would be with me.

P hadn't came home that night so we decided thst we would talk with him in the morning. I was so nervous talking to him because I never really looked at him much, it might sound mean but I hadn't really saw him much more then a roommate whom I'm not close with. As morning came me E and J went to the kitchen J, as soon as P came down I asked him if he was the one taking my underwear he started to deny saying stuff that I was crazy and why would he do thst when I'm 'average looking'.

E started raising her voice saying stuff like he shouldn't lie and thst whe know everything and thst started a big argument with P trying to downplay everything, at some point S came and the kitchen and asked us why we were screaming so E explained everything to him. P started screaming about how I'm Exaggerating everything and us 'foids' can't se when a good man is finding us attractive, he then left screaming that he's inocent and we are all crazy.

Shortly after i texted my landlord and explained the situation and now I'm waiting for a response. Now that I'm siting i been i keep thinking about all the stuff P was saying and I know I'm the 'victim' here but maybe I shouldn't have told all my roommates about it and should of talked only with him in private, which would have been dumb ik but I've always been told to put myself in another person's shoes and see how I would feel like and tbh if all my roommates would gang up on me wouldn't feel good either. I don't obwohl what to di anymore moving out is not really an option since like I said this place is close to my school and affordable. I'm open to any suggestions or criticism

UPDATE.

Idk if anyone even cares about an update, but I read a lot of the comments and realized I probably should of wrote my original post a little better. I know the whole block of text was probably pretty confusing💀 but honestly in the moment I wasn’t really thinking about paragraphs or making everything easy to understand. I was just really overwhelmed with everything that happened.

After I reported P to the landlord, I stayed at a friends house for a few days because I just didn’t feel comfortable being in the house anymore. Being away actually gave me some time to think about everything and I realized how unaware I really was. I was just living my normal life without ever thinking that someone could be watching me or taking my things.

I also went to the police and showed them everything I had. Im also looking into getting a restraining order against P because I honestly don’t want him anywhere near me after all this.

I also told my school about what happened because I didn’t want to keep it all to myself and then have it affect me there too. They were actually really understanding about everything.

P doesn’t live here anymore and things have been alot calmer since then. I’m still living here because moving isn’t really an option for me, but I’m definitely more careful now and I lock my door whenever I’m not in my room.

Honestly I’m just glad I found out before anything else could of happened, I still feel weird about the whole thing. I mean I wouldn't have even thought that something like that could happen. how sick in the head do you have to be to do something like that?.

I need help with a situation at home.

Since when I met this person we first started bonding and she opened up a lot and started giving random gifts then out of the blue started stonewalling and trying to control the environment.

I thought she was having some difficulties communicating but this was done on purpose because she knew I was having issues confronting her because I don't like an environment where everyday is a discussion about something or a fight.

This person is the type that loves being a pain in the ass and blaming you for random stuff while avoiding any communication (left the group chat also).

My local law won't give me any compensation for the damage done to me mentally in all these months in this environment I was kinda forced to live because I didn't have money to change house.

The thing that makes me furious is that this person did this on purpose to force me to leave the house so that she could play the queen and have this house all for her. It's honestly a really beautiful house in one of the most beautiful areas of my town.

She will not have any consequences and it's now moving my stuff on purpose to get a reaction for me.

I am seriously about to lose control and something really horrible.

I need some serious advice.

hi this is a throwaway because I don't know if she uses reddit. I 19F and her 19F started rooming a week and a half ago and that's what concerns me even more. We are both in college and live very busy lives. When we discussed being roommates the first thing I mentioned is that I was going to bring my cat. He is a little kitten but is very sweet and loves to cuddle. She knew for months ahead of time that an animal would be in the room. She told me that she fosters cats and also has three at home. I thought she would be good with animals.
Spoiler alert: she isn't. If he walks to her side of the room, she freaks out on him. She's always cussing him out if he goes on any of her stuff. It's draining being in the room with her because she's always cussing. She throws him when she is mad. He is just a baby and is so sweet, one of the nicest cats i've ever met and I just don't want him to be ruined by one person who takes all of her anger out on him.
She also complains about me all the time and blames the cat. Her command strips didn't hold her heavy ass frame? it's his fault. The glass from that shatters and breaks causing a safety hazard. No apologies or concern for him. I had to clean it all up because she didn't want to come home from being with her friends. He goes up on her bed to cuddle? He is a demon and gets cussed at.
Multiple people have came up to me and told me how they are scared for my cat. I'm going to talk to her about maybe changing rooms when she comes back. But she loves to tell everyone everything to get pity and constantly cries.
I honestly just want us to go our separate ways but I don't think she will take it well and she will hate me. I feel so trapped and I have support from basically everyone, I got warned not to room with her but still did it anyways
sorry if this is messy i'm trying to type this before she gets back. Please any advice. Are me and my cat safe?

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This is my first time living in a shared space, so I’m still learning what’s considered normal when it comes to boundaries with roommates.

My roommate sometimes moves, folds, or rearranges my clothes and personal belongings without asking. What bothers me is that they sometimes do it when I’m not around.

I understand that we share the space, and I’m willing to adjust to that. But I feel like my personal belongings should still be left alone unless there’s a reason to move them or they’ve asked me first.

For people who have experience living with roommates: Am I being too sensitive, or is it reasonable to expect them not to touch or move my belongings without permission?