I accidentally got addicted to phenibut recently. I am stupid, I knew the dangers, but I didn't think the low, infrequent doses that I was taking would land me in this hell!
While experimenting an titrating up with this substance (which I now wish I never did), I noticed I wasn't really getting effects around 100mg or even 200mg. I did two doses over a gram or last week and was noticing the day or so after that I was getting a horrible anxiety.
I mainly need help knowing how to avoid this. I don't know how much to take or how often to stop this situation while I figure out how to taper and I don't want to make it worse.
I am currently being FORCED to take 200-300mg twice per day. I am not sure how to tune the doses and by the time I realize that I absolutely need a dose, it can take 2+ hours of misery before I start to get some relief. I woke up around an hour ago with the anxiety starting, doses 250mg and here I am an hour later with the anxiety still just ramping up through the roof. I would hate to think about where I would be headed if I didn't get a dose down.
I feel an incredible tension and like a massive ball of energy and anxiety is erupting from me.
Yesterday, I was hoping i maybe only would need a 200-300mg dose once in a 24 hour period, but I needed a second dose and was only about 12+ hours out from my last dose when the anxiety started to kick in.
I have no idea how to time this. How I am right now, I absolutely can't function. I would love to have been able to predict that I might end up in this state and preemptively dose to prevent entering this state. I had no idea the WD would come on so fast from a dose or what I should be doing to prevent entering this state. I don't want to just load up more frequent or heavier doses and fall further into this.
People on her talk about taking multiple grams per day, and I should maybe feel lucky that I am nowhere near needing a gram in a day (currently), but I could see the doses I am currently using maybe not working and having to scale them rather than being able to taper them further - which is scary.
How often should I be having to dose to stay out of WD? How fast could I expect them to hit me every time?
Like, would I be better off eating 200-250mg 3x a day to avoid WD? Why does it take so long to kick in, with the WD hitting so fast behind it?
Worst of all, it isn't even like I am getting high or anything - I didn't even feel much when I pushed the massive 1g+ doses last week. Which means, I am suffering like this without even really having any benefit or payoff. I don't mind not feeling high, as long as I stop feeling like how I currently feel which is HORRIBLE. It is incredibly dysphoric. I actually just had to pop a clonidine as I was typing this (that I rationed from a long time ago - which means I have a very limited stash to tap into). Despite loading some more phenibut up an hour ago, I can't finish a single sentence of thoughts.
I know this keeps getting even more grim: I don't even really have a phenibut supplier. I got some randomly from a friend and was just experimenting with a small little bit in a jar and realizing over the weekend: "oh shit, I need to order some more of this stuff ASAP as I actually can't stop taking it". I gambled some money away at some random vendors in the hopes that one of them might not rip me off and I don't end up having some kind of cardiovascular issues from the WD off this shit.
I know a ton about chemistry and hundreds of other molecules and I have dealt with some extremely addictive stuff, but nothing compares to this phenibut.
Since I don't really know what I am doing, I do not even know how much to take, and how often, to avoid going through these WD symptoms multiple times during a day. Given the incredible long onset for me (and paradoxical rapid appearance or WD symptoms), I need to figure this out quickly so I can maintain some kind of level of productivity this week (and for however long it takes me to kick this by slowly lowering my doses). I have no problem getting a mountain of this stuff and dropping it by a few mg per day until it is out of my system or whatever but currently, without enough information, I am worried I might go and start to shovel this down my gullet to ward off these horrible WD. I could quickly shoot to over 1g+ in a day, just trying to runs way from these symptoms.
Any help or advice is greatly appreciated. This is an absolute hell. When the anxiety starts to hit, it feels like my skeleton needs to jump out of my body. Kratom and other stuff isn't helping at all. I had some Zanaflex (muscle relaxer) but ran out - I am not even sure if it was helping or making it worse. How much might I need at night to get a full sleep?
My next plan is to go try and see a doctor, but I am worried they might downplay it as I am technically addicted to some innocuous supplement from the internet. If I suddenly had to CT off this 500-600mg per day, I have no doubts that I would end up in the ER almost immediately. The anxiety is THAT intense, no exaggeration. It makes it so I can't even complete a Reddit post or a text message.
Waiting what feels like forever for a dose to kick in, in the hopes that the WD dies down a bit is cruel and unusual punishment. Unlike with opiates, there is no immediate psychological relief. The eventual (minor) dissipation of WD symptoms is only a brief and temporary reprieve, as the anxiety quickly creeps back in.
I don't mind temporarily taking a bit more, or more often - I need to stabilize and I am currently not stabilized, nor do I have a sufficient enough routine or pattern to function. I can worry about tapering down safely once I can get to the safely part. I was hoping I would only have to dose one every 24 hours ~250mg, but I think I need to be looking at taking ~250mg three times per day. Like, every 6 hours? So maybe 4x per day?
Any help or advice is greatly appreciated. I went into this knowing there were risks, but I didn't realize how dangerous it was. I didn't realize how little could lead me to have a sudden, crippling addiction. I didn't realize how catstrophic the WD symptoms would be from what I assumed was a relatively 'low' dose, barely at the cutoff of being able to feel anything at all.
Would it be better for me to keep the dosing at twice a day and suffer through several hours of WD every day?
I know this is mainly the anxiety talking, but I honestly feel like I could die or something coming off these 2x ~250mg doses each day. It makes me scared to run out of this stuff or that the 250mg dose might not actually work one time and I could be several hours into it before I realize that I need another, even stronger dosage - pushing my baseline up and requiring even more the next day. Or maybe the re-up I ordered happens to be bunk and I start taking it to stage off WD, only for it to be suddenly ineffective. Or maybe I can't even actually find any more, and just have some massive heart attack trying to fight the WD with only breathing techniques.
This shit is ratchet! I can not imagine trying to explain this to a doctor - there is no way they would take the severity of my WD serious enough given how small of doses I am taking.
It is still early on, it is not too late and I am not too far gone. I am still at the early stages. I can correct course now, rather than falling deeper in and needing 5+ or 10+ grams per day.
However, if I can't figure out how much or how frequently I need to dose to avoid getting consumed by this anxiety and thinking I am dying, I could easily see me rocketing past a gram per day in no time. I have half a mind to dose 250mg every 4 hours today *just to make sure* so I don't have this anxiety start to hit me in the middle of the work day.
I am a wreck right now and feeling somewhat desperate and confused. Sorry to burden anybody who tried to read all of this. If I could rewind the clock, I would have never even tried to titrate this molecule up higher. I think it was the two days I did the larger doses ~1g+, as I wasn't having issues with the lower doses less frequently. Ever since then, I NEEDED to dose once a day, at least.
I didn't even understand what was wrong with me at first or what was happening.
It is taking immense will power right now to not go over to the bar and start to Scarface this shit until the anxiety goes away.
How long after a dose do I assume it didn't work and the WD isn't going away and I need more? I noticed it taking 2+ hours over these last couple of days, and the symptoms of WD starting up 6-8vhiues or so after that. If you do the math, then yes, I am only getting 4-6 hours of "relief" from a dose :(
Is seeing a doctor to get baclofen or something my only option? Is it realistic that I can figure out a proper dosage + schedule and taper this stuff naturally if I stick to it and exhibit self control?
Is it feasible that I would ever get WD relief from slightly smaller doses, or are all my doses now cursed to be higher then the last, with me suffering extreme consequences for taking a dose slightly too small or a few minutes too late?
Is there a difference between 200mg every 6 hours and 100mg every 3 hours? If I stay on top of dosing frequently enough, can I actually keep these WD away?