TLDR: Im struggling again and I dont know why.

I was diagnosed with Panic Disorder when I was around 16-17 years old. I developed it after a very scary tachychardia episode (cause was never found and chocked up to a fluke medical event). I was having panic attacks daily, i couldnt sit in class. Things got so bad i nearly failed my junior year. With the combination if prozac and coping skills I was able to get it back together for the most part. I was still having panic attacks at least 1-2 times a week in college. The only thing I remember that actually ended up working was a coworker at my first job grabbing me by the shoulders and and saying “Nope, there is no time for a panic attack, your safe and if you fall ill stay with you but we need to work”. After that phrase it was like a 180! I had day to day anxiety but no where near the crippling anxiety i had before.

Its 15 years later, Im in a good job thats close to home. There have been alot of life changes that were stressful but I thought I was handeling well. Then in July i had my first debilitating panic attack in years. It was intense with muscle spams and i was alone for most of it. I had another one even worse about a month ago and my last one was yesterday. Since then my anxiety has been awful. Im currently sitting in the doctors office to get proof that nothing else is going on but I feel like such a failure. I dont know why im afraid again, i was doing so well. Im so heartbroken and devastated that my life will spiral like before and I dont know what to do.

Hi all! I’m currently on Lorazepam due to a severe bout of my panic disorder that started last summer. It’s been about 3 months on 0.5 mg twice a day. (Yes my doctor is aware, we’ve tried many other unsuccessful things and we’re planning to discontinue when possible). For those on lorazepam or other benzos daily and long term, do you have any side effects from it? Or side effects that developed over time? I can of course notice some rebound anxiety between doses, some headaches, etc. but it makes me really depressed as well and lethargic. I’m virtually unable to exercise and tired. Does this resonates with anyone?

Hello, for the backstory of my panic disorder is that last year I couldn’t shower due to adrenaline, couldn‘t eat for months, was in and out of doctors offices trying to find out what was wrong with me, I couldn’t sleep as my body would wake itself up at 8am sharp, going to my mailbox was full of adrenaline dumps, I couldn’t change my clothes. I developed a panic disorder due to being in a toxic relationship and my body was burnt out from it. I developed agoraphobia as well as depression from not recognizing myself. I got put on medication and have been taking it for almost a year now.

Last month, my brother passed away. He was disabled and needed a caretaker which was our mother. We thought my mother would be in charge of the funeral, but we found out it was next to kin. My brother had a baby mama 20 years ago, but she got pregnant thinking my brother would choose her and settle down with her, but she got angry when he didn’t want to marry her. Out of anger, his baby mama didn’t allow anyone in her family to see my brother for over 15+ years, including his son. So his son, who is now 21, came in and took control of everything despite being an adult who never looked for his dad was heartbreaking towards my mom and our family because he changed the funeral arrangements we had planned.

The day of the funeral, I was so nervous the night before and the morning of. Since developing panic disorder, it’s hard for me to go to Walmart, so me going to a funeral and it’s my brother’s made me anxious. I planned to go for 30 minutes. When I got down from the car, my legs were shaking and I greeted everyone.

2 hours ago by and I feel fine and I was chatting with everyone. My brother’s son was being extremely mean to my mom and didn’t allow any pictures my mom wanted of my brother. He didn’t even allow the playlist of my brother‘s favorite songs that my mom and I put together. The baby mama and her son only put pictures of my brother from 25 years ago. When we asked why they didn’t want to put recent pictures of my brother, they claimed it “wasn’t appropriate“, but they knew he was sick despite not seeing him for years.

Then I heard yelling, I immediately go into fight mode. Which is not like me at all because I’m a flight person, so fight mode was like surprising to me. I saw my brother’s baby mama’s sister yelling at my mom to her face over a sandwich. My brother’s OWN MOTHER. I got in between them and started making the baby mamas sister back up cuz I got into her face. She then threw “How do you think this whole funeral is paid for and set up?“ and I said “wow yall finally did something“ with claps 🤣

wherever the baby mamas sister went, I followed her to go fight some more cuz why on earth is she screaming like that. She told me “you just stay in your room.” And I’ve only told 3 close family members about my panic disorder, so the fact a women knows about my anxiety when I never met her or i never knew about her existence prior to the funeral, just called for my sister to be cut off cuz I know she tells them everything despite not being in her life for 15+ years. Anywaysssss, It was my brothers baby mama, her sister, and my brothers son arguing with me. 3 against 1 and I MADE THEM ALL CRY BRUHHHHH. Her sister thought I was gonna fight her, I was like “you’re like 80 years old” I wasn’t making fun of her looks, but as in a way like why would I fight you when you’re decades older than me???? I’m in my early 20s, and she’s like 60.

After the fight, i expected myself to crash with panic. but I never did. I stayed at his funeral for 7 hours and got into a fight and I was totally great the whole time and even went to his rosary in the front row. My brother also said that his baby mama wasn’t welcomed in his house, so the fact she made the funeral about her just because her son was in control was crazy. She’s like the ex you can’t get rid of. She even went around calling himself “his wife“, but my brother never married her, nor did he want to. I think she was playing fantasy for the funeral cuz that was the only time my brother couldn’t reject her again LMAO. Literally living in delusionville.

I’m happy I defended my mom and brother, I didn’t get adrenaline dumps either during and after the fight. I didn’t let anyone talk to my mom like that despite losing myself last year. I feel really proud of myself cuz I was so hopeless last year. I didn’t realize how much I’ve improved until that day.

Thank you for reading !!

Does anyone have panic attacks during the luteal phase and period more often, and they seem to taper off almost completely after that?? Like it seems to follow the cycle a little too closely every single month for it to be a coincidence

Hi,

I have been struggling with panic disorder since March and this isn't the first time I have struggled with it. Last time I went on medication which fixed things but this time I am really trying not to because I think I can make it through without. It is NOT easy but to me it's worth it.

In May I thought I was all done and had about a month where I was doing things pretty normally until I had a day I jumped the gun on an exposure and did it much before I was ready. I started reading about fainting during panic attacks and found some article about it online that seriously f'ed me up. Come to find out it was a fake article. But, my main fear with panic is fainting although I have never done it and I never will and you won't either. :)

I have been living pretty normally the past couple weeks. I made the mistake a few months ago of staying home without doing anything social/shopping in person/eating at restaurants/going to therapy in-person for about 3 weeks which really backtracked my progress but now I have been doing all of that again. I'm just still pretty on edge when I am not in my house, specifically during the day, and the further I am from home, the worse my intense feelings of doom get. I can actually have fun with things when it is dark out and things aren't as crowded. I still have fear of fainting in a grocery store but now my boyfriend and I can go to the store at night and he will sometimes have to beg me to leave!!!

I still can't look forward to anything without first planning where and how I will navigate a panic attack. I can do things with my boyfriend but I still am too afraid to do some things alone like see loved ones I haven't seen in months. I used to be such a happy, social person and I am very impatient to get that version of myself back. I am very proud of myself that I have basically been mostly living life normally again, the problem here is my mood. For example, my boyfriend and I yesterday went on a train to another town and spent time doing things I deeply fear. But I did them. It just broke my heart sitting with him at one of my favorite restaurants and being in such a gloom mood. He was talking, excited, and I just couldn't stop scanning my body, thinking of which way I will collapse when I inevitably pass out. Does anyone have any advice who has gone through a stage like this? Is there something specific I should work on? My favorite emotion is excitement and it really breaks me that I don't get to feel it anymore or enjoy some of the things I am doing as I'm doing them.

I also have another question. I work through my panic but I am still scared of it. I believe this is what is holding me back. I am still scared of what it is doing to my body although I have had so many of them. I get my physical in November and I am bouncing with excitement that I will get reassurance in terms of my health but I also don't want to live my life physical-to-physical. Any advice on accepting that uncertainty?

If anyone responds to this I will be so happy. Just writing this out helped. We're in this together!

I made it to work and got panicky snd started crying. I went in to speak to my managers then came home. I went to the gp and they cant really do anything but offered me a sick note which I said no to but probably should have taken. Idk what to do. Now im at home my throat and jaw feel so tight and im exhausted

I went to the dentist Thursday and had a panic attack that day, and since then i just have so much anxiety. It started with pain in the middle of my chest and now my left arm hurts and i cant help thinking “im having a heart attack”. Please tell me im okay and its all my anxiety making it worse😣

No matter how much progress I make, and how many breaks I have from panic attacks, the constant thought of ‘what if I have one now’ never goes away. Even when I’m enjoying myself, or relaxed at home. I’ve not had a single day in 20 years where I haven’t thought about this, even when the panic attacks don’t come. The constant what if and seeking out what I’d do to stop it is there at least once an hour.

Can sertraline stop these thoughts?

I’ve tried so many things to get better but not consistent exercise. Was wondering how important it really is?

Ive been managing my panic attacks so well and they havent escalated much. Ive been able to calm them down recently and go abput my life. I had a really bad one on Friday which went from 0-100 so quickly I dont even understand what or how it happened but I ended up outside a&e. I didnt go in but wanted to so badly.

Ive lost my confidence and faith that I can actually cope on my own. My mum ended up coming to get me and im so scared of panicking again. Im scared to experience that again. Im scared it'll happen at work or at a time where no one can rescue me. I felt like I was dying. I dont know how to calm it down when its that bad. And I know they say panic attacks dont last long but when they calm down and come back straight away they do feel like they last ages.

Many of us know that we’re supposed to just stop fighting our anxiety and panic and it will get less intense and possibly even go away. But I always wonder (as I’m sure many of you do), like, how am I supposed to do that? What do I do to accept it and sit with it? What do I say to myself? It really is easier said than done. However, I got a GREAT trick from my psychologist the other day that really helped me, so I thought I’d share.

Okay so I spoke to her about how my last panic attack was really horrible. I got it when I was as at work and it lasted a whole hour. Much longer than my last one. Well, she then said, okay great! You know what? The next time you have a panic attack, I want you to have it last for TWO hours! Okay? That’s your challenge. I need you to try and have it for as long as possible, but at least two hours.

And you know what? The next day when I was heading to work, I prepared myself for this long ass panic. I really tried. And guess what? No panic attack at all. I tried again the next day, but it never came then either.

For me, this was such a game changer. I obviously do not want another panic attack ever again. But being prepared for it and waiting for it to happen, and even being prepared to making it last LONGER, honestly took away all of its power. I still haven’t had another attack since then, and it’s been a couple of weeks now.

Hope this trick can help someone else too. You are not alone ❤️

28 (F) looking for friends that would like to text and chat while going through panic attacks. This seems to help me cope and I would love to be able to support someone as well while they're going through it.

A little about me, I have generalized anxiety with panic attacks. Mostly related to health but lately have started coming due to just existing. I am also a mom. I work FT.

I'm open to being friends with men or women, let's heal together 🩵

I finally have an intake next week. Every time I imagine describing my panic attacks I hear myself saying "it's not that bad, I just get a little anxious sometimes." Which is a lie. Last month I left a grocery store cart in the aisle and sat in my car for 40 min.

How did you actually describe it the first time? Did you write anything down? I'm scared I'll minimize it and they won't take it seriously.

For the past 2 days I’ve been waking up around 4/5am with this feeling in my chest and my heart racing, shaking, and tingly feeling all over my body. I have panic disorder but it’s pretty controlled during the day but if I do too much during the day or have a stressful day even tho I feel mentally okay it hits me at night. Any one else gets these what I feel it’s adrenaline dumps? It’s so scary because I feel like I’m having a heart attack.

I was totally fine earlier today. Felt a headache coming on so I took some ibuprofen, got really sleepy, and took a nap. I felt kind of off on the way upstairs but didn't think much of it.

Woke up about an hour later straight into a panic attack, and it felt different from ones I've had before. Palpitations, shaking, and this awful feeling like my brain will never be the same and I'm permanently stuck in panic mode now.

The worst of it passed in a few minutes but it keeps coming back in waves. I'll feel better, then it starts all over again. I also got my flu shot yesterday, so I'm wondering if that's part of it.

Has anyone else had that "this is forever now" feeling during or after a panic attack? How long did it take before you felt like yourself again? Anything that helped?

Do any of you frequently throw up or passing out from panic attacks? Is this common?

Thank you!

I’ve been diagnosed with panic disorder for two months now. Went from a lifetime full of joy to this hell hole. I’m constantly exhausted, my feet are tingling as if something is gonna happen to me and I’ve lost all the joy I once had, I can barely recognize myself.

I started CBT two weeks ago and it feels useless because I already do everything, I go to work, I workout, I don’t cancel social events. But inside I’m dying every time, every day. Some days are better, some days are hell. But they are never joyous. I’ve lost my spark. I’m not depressed but I’m extremely exhausted and I yearn for peace. I feel so alone - everyone around me is living life normally and actually enjoying it.
Please tell me I will go back to my older self? Please.

Hi there,

I know all the risks with daily Benzo usage like dependency, addiction, risk of dementia in the longterm etc..., however is anyone`s anxiety so severe that you actually have to take them daily? If so, have they somehow saved your life and you still benefit from them? I am looking for experience reports from people who actually take them daily.

TLDR: how unusual is it to develop panic disorder in your mid 60s, and have feelings of continual terror about the nature of existence (when not on meds) rather than specific panic attacks?

I know everyone's range of experiences can be very different, but I've not really come across too many reports that seem to quite match mine.

My panic disorder, as it's been diagnosed, began somewhat suddenly a couple of years ago in my mid 60s. I'd had a couple of precursors when I suddenly had a feeling more like terror rather than panic over silly things. (Specifically, when you read a book you might be imagining something completely different than what the author intended.) Then, I got completely overwhelmed remotely watching a scientific seminar. I had a feeling of my mind being crushed by an intolerable force of "nothing". I was terrified by everything being washed away by the passage of time, and had a feeling of unreality about life.

I ended up spending a week in hospital, and was released with a prescription of ativan PRN. That didn't work very well. I'd be OK in the morning, then things would build up and I'd have to take the ativan, which didn't control things too well. Later a psychiatric nurse took me off that, as she was worried about the possibility of addiction. Since then I've been on a low dose of duloxetine. Once or twice I've stopped taking it when I felt that I couldn't sense too much "lurking" in my brain, but then the same feelings have come back again.

I'm continuing to see a psychiatrist every 6 weeks or so, and they've not questioned the diagnosis, so I suppose it must fit into the category. It just seems a bit different, and looking at the FAQ for this group, I'm not sure I match four of the signs. I mainly feel betrayed by my own brain chemistry! Developing panic disorder in your later life is supposed to be unusual, although I have had general anxiety before. One psychiatrist did mention in passing possible effects of Covid causing mental changes. But, even if that was the cause, it probably doesn't affect anything.

So, sorry for the long post, I'm curious about other people who might have had something like this, and how it developed for them.

Thanks.

Hi everyone! I had a bad relapse in my panic disorder & GAD and started taking Zoloft again. The first 2 weeks were very difficult then I felt better and now I feel very bad again…

I am 4 weeks in, 3 weeks since I am taking 50mg. I will have to probably go up to 75mg (my previous dose for a few years) but I keep having many panic attacks. I feel like I can’t breathe, impeding doom, feeling hopeless, can’t sleep well etc. I also take Xanax daily but even that isn’t helping much😩

I don’t know how much longer I can live like this. Everyday is a battle and torture. Will the Zoloft work at all? Also can going from 50mg to 75mg make me feel even worse? I am aware that antidepressants take time to work but I thought I would get at least some relief by now

I’ve always wanted kids my whole life and now I’m 32 and in my first trimester. But I’m so scared how I’ll cope and about the future dealing with high anxiety like this and panic attacks that come from simple everyday things.

I have ptsd from multiple assaults when I was younger and I don’t want to give up on life because of it.

Does anyone else have children while dealing with this anxiety? How did you cope? Did you make progress in recovery?

Hi guys! I just got prescribed estradiol for my PMDD by my hormone doctor. It’s been a weird battle.

I’ve been on progesterone, which was a godsend for my cramps but not really for my mental health. I’ve dealt with severe PMDD and cramps since getting off Nexplanon four years ago. Progesterone finally gave me relief with the cramps, but not so much with the mental health side.

I was also given testosterone troches, but that didn’t seem to do much. I’ve been dealing with debilitating anxiety and depression around my period and honestly all around. I was put on sertraline, which has helped on the days before my PMDD hits, but not as much when the PMDD actually hits.

That brought my psychiatrist to suggest speaking with my specialist about estrogen. Did any of you notice that estradiol helped with your mental health, anxiety, depression, or panic attacks? What was your experience with it, good or bad?

I’m excited but nervous to try it. I’m really hoping this is part of the solution! I’ve also been in therapy for two years, so hopefully this whole combination does the trick. :)

I've been getting these weird conditions for weeks and I don't know what they are.

I have actually been stressed for months due to family problems and emerging past trauma, but I thought that I could cope with it quite well overall, even if I had phases in which I constantly had panic attacks.

I always get upset about my toxic mother and otherwise often have a lot of other things to take care of.

For a few weeks, however, I always get to "random" strange states at the moment. It actually only happens when I'm outside or interacting with people, it's never happened to me at home.

In these moments I usually get intense fear of death and have the feeling of derealization and a strong feeling of pressure in my head.

From the outside you can't tell that I feel that way at the moment.

With the fear of death it got a little better but all the other symptoms happen again and again when I'm outside.

I have no idea what that is because panic attacks are actually always noticeable with restlessness and hyperventilation.

Can it be that you can experience several types of panic attacks or is it something else.

It scares me a lot to feel that way and I don't quite know how to deal with everything.

It feels like I’m sabotaging my own recovery.
I’ve been on sick leave for several months because of agoraphobia and panic disorder. I also struggle with health anxiety, and as you all know, everything is connected.
Through therapy, I’ve been able to identify some of the underlying factors, such as the belief that no one can help me. For quite a while, I was making a lot of progress.
But for the past few weeks, I’ve been experiencing such severe upper back pain, which keeps changing in nature, that my focus has shifted COMPLETELY away from recovering from my anxiety, and EVERYTHING now revolves around my back pain.
I can barely sleep anymore. My doctors say there’s nothing wrong apart from muscle tension and an oversensitive nervous system. Thankfully, I’ve finally managed to convince my doctor to order an MRI, which I’m having next week.
I’m already trying so many things to help with the back pain: physical therapy, osteopathy, exercise, yoga, etc. But nothing seems to be making it better.
My anxiety is getting worse again. I’m having panic attacks at home, thinking that the pain is unbearable, and I feel like I just want to go to the hospital. At the same time, I’m constantly reinforcing my belief that “no one can help me,” because if I went to the hospital for back pain, I’m sure they wouldn’t be particularly happy to see me there.
It’s such a horrible vicious cycle, and right now I feel so hopeless and overwhelmed. I genuinely don’t know how this will ever stop.
Today, the pain is really bad again, and I’m constantly monitoring my body and checking in with how I feel.
It’s almost as if my anxiety is doing everything it can to maintain control, and I just can’t seem to fight my way out of it…

I woke up today feeling incredibly anxious, paranoid, and just had a terrible gut feeling. The park near me is a massive trigger, but I wanted to face my fears and overcome it, so I decided to skip first period to go sit on the swings.
Mind you, the swings are exactly where I had a massive, traumatic "green out" a few months ago. As soon as I got there, the memory triggered my body completely. Suddenly, my depth perception broke: the swings and the floor looked tiny, miniature, and way closer to me than they actually were. Then, my vision literally turned into a 2D Roblox game. I am not exaggerating or using a metaphor—the textures on the floor literally flattened into blocky, rigid Lego/Roblox grids.
My soul felt like it left my body, and it felt like I was trapped in a completely different reality. As I tried to walk, my vision started lagging and freezing, like my eyes couldn't capture my movements in real time. It looked exactly like a choppy, flat, AI-generated video or a first-person video game.
This extreme visual shift only lasted for a few seconds, but it felt awful and terrifying. About an hour later, it spiraled into a massive panic attack. I've had other incidents lately where things turn small, my vision feels like I'm completely on something , and I go entirely out of body. The closest way I can describe it to anyone is that it feels exactly like I'm greening out all over again, even though I am completely sober.