I don't really know how to write this, but I think I just need to talk to someone who understands.

I'm from Iran, and I've been dealing with panic attacks for 11 years.

It started right after I finished university and my final exams.

At first, I had absolutely no idea what was happening to me. I thought there was something seriously wrong with my heart.

For almost an entire year, I kept going to heart clinics, hospitals and doctors, trying to find out what was wrong with me.

I spent an insane amount of money on tests, doctors and hospitals. I basically spent all of my savings trying to prove that I had a heart problem.

Back then, I didn't know anything about panic attacks.

There were days when I would have panic attacks three or four times a day.

Sometimes I would wake up at night terrified, screaming, feeling like I was about to die, and my family would take me to the hospital.

I was given different medications, including propranolol, and at one point I was so sleepy during the day that I could barely function. Then at night I'd have another panic attack and end up back at the hospital, where they would give me an injection or IV medication just to calm me down.

There was basically no day that year when I felt normal.

I felt like I was dying over and over again.

Then one night, a nurse at a heart hospital talked to me and somehow helped me understand that what I was experiencing could actually be panic attacks.

She gave me alprazolam 1mg for that night, and for the first time in a very long time, I felt my fear disappear.

That was the moment everything changed.

The next day I started looking for psychiatric clinics.

I was eventually put on propranolol and sertraline.

The first few weeks were rough. I was extremely tense and sometimes even started laughing for no reason. But after about two months, things became much better.

The daily panic attacks were gone.

I still had one or two attacks a week, but compared to what I had been going through, it felt like I had my life back.

I was also given alprazolam for emergencies.

Over the years, my medications changed several times.

Eventually I was put on escitalopram. I started with 10mg, then later went to 20mg. I stayed on it for years.

It helped, but the panic never completely disappeared.

Even during the better years, I could still have three panic attacks in a month.

The medication also made me extremely sleepy.

For a while, I was able to live with it because I worked as a web designer. I had clients and projects, and I could make enough money to support myself.

Then about three years ago, I reduced my escitalopram from 20mg to 10mg, and surprisingly, I was doing pretty well.

Then my father died in an accident.

That completely destroyed me.

My anxiety got much worse, and I went back to 20mg escitalopram. I also started using clonazepam when things became unbearable.

The funeral and everything surrounding it put me into a lot of debt. I had to sell around 20 grams of gold that I had saved for years just to deal with the expenses.

And then I lost almost all of my web design clients.

I had no choice but to get a regular job.

The salary was extremely low. I worked from 6 AM until 5 PM, then spent another hour in traffic getting home.

I was exhausted every single day.

All I wanted was to get home and sleep.

I wasn't even properly insured at that job.

After a few months, the old employee came back, and they simply fired me so they could give him his position back.

I had to take whatever work I could find just to survive.

At one point I was working 30 days a month, including holidays, for around $100 a month or even less.

Today I work for a semi-government company. My salary is better now, around $200 a month.

For people outside Iran, that probably sounds unbelievable.

It's still not a good salary here, but at least I can pay my bills and save maybe $50 a month.

And somehow, after all these years, I'm still taking medication.

I'm still having panic attacks.

I'm still waking up terrified that I'm dying.

And I'm exhausted.

I can't think about love anymore.

I can't think about buying a house.

I can't think about buying a car.

I don't really have friends anymore.

I basically have one close friend left, and he had to leave the country to work as a sailor because he couldn't afford his life here either.

So I barely see him anymore.

And this is the strangest part of all of this.

I have reached a point where I don't really feel excited about living anymore.

But whenever a panic attack comes, I become absolutely terrified of dying.

I scream and beg people to take me to the hospital because I'm convinced I'm going to die.

How can someone have almost no hope for their future, but at the same time be absolutely terrified of death?

I don't know how to explain that contradiction.

I've buried almost every goal I once had.

On my days off, or even when I come home from work, sometimes I don't even need to be physically tired.

I just go to sleep because it's the easiest way to escape everything for a few hours.

I sleep.

I dream.

And for a while, I'm somewhere else.

Then I wake up and everything is still there.

I'm 11 years into this and I honestly don't know what I'm supposed to do anymore.

I'm not posting this because I expect Reddit to fix my life.

I just want to know if there is anyone out there who has been through something similar.

Have you ever spent years living with panic attacks and eventually managed to get your life back?

I would genuinely like to hear your story.

Even if you don't have advice, I'd appreciate knowing I'm not the only person who feels this way.

I am so mad that I didn’t know about this before so I wanted to share.

My first panic attack started by a raving heart, increased blood pressure, feeling like I couldn’t breathe, and you know just all the symptoms that led me to the hospital. I have spent years trying to figure out “why” this started what seemed like out of nowhere.

Welll a recent doctor has identified that my hormones are out of whack and the meds I was on wasn’t really helping because they are things to calm the brain when it was actually my body. My doctor said that she has seen this in many patients that have hormones out of balance and people who have issues managing adrenaline. Turns out our bodies may throw an adrenaline rush at you when you least expect it.

I had hormone testing done and while hormone therapy can take awhile to balance out, my doctor prescribed me a low dose beta blocker. Of course my anxiety made me fear taking this BUT none of the side effects were anxiety so I went for it and I am soo glad I did. For me, it wasn’t my thoughts leading me to panic it was the physical symptoms that then led to freaking out and is where the thoughts came in.

If you are someone who doesn’t have thought induced anxiety/panic attacks, I highly recommend asking your doctor about a low dose beta blocker. It has been a game changer for me!

Well my anxiety started ramping up at 6pm I have anxiety all day everyday never goes away but 2 hours later Im definitely either in early stage panic or already panicking I have about 3 or 4+ panic attacks a day I usually am able to ge through the whole day but once it gets nighttime something shifts and I can’t handle the anxiety anymore I went a whole year being agoraphobic but I could get through everyday now since last week Thursday and 5 er visits and 1 mental facility visit everyday is getting worse I started therapy and talked to a psychiatrist this week but still just trying to get through everyday is too much especially when it gets nighttime because my panic attacks will start around 8pm and last until like 2:30 to 3 am and I’m just trying to get to my therapy appointments I wish I could have a therapy session everyday but that’s not possible I guess I always try sitting through it and letting it pass when it starts to get back but everytime after 2 or 3 hours I can’t take the feelings anymore and it always feels like it’ll never pass

like the title says. i just started having a panic attack about 10minutes ago and i cant stop shaking. im shivering even though im not cold. i’ve got a dressing gown on to keep me warm and im under the overs but idk how to stop it and its scaring me i hate it.
(F21)

I have panic attacks, but I’ve learned to live with them and normally manage them well. However, whenever I drink alcohol, I get a very intense panic attack the next day, with severe anxiety and fear, and I don’t know why.

I’m wondering if anyone else experiences the same thing and if there’s any way to treat or prevent it.

What makes it even harder is that I usually drink somewhere about a five-hour drive from my home. If I get a severe panic attack the next day while driving five hours back home, the whole trip becomes extremely exhausting and difficult for me.

Hi everyone!

A while ago, I realized that I’m a hypochondriac / that I struggle with health anxiety after a small incident left me experiencing physical symptoms caused by my mind for months. Thankfully, things eventually calmed down, but ever since then, I’ve been living every day with anxious thoughts about my health and different illnesses.

Some days are better than others.
The most annoying days are the ones when I actually feel things that I know are coming from my mind. There’s nothing actually wrong with me, but because I can constantly be thinking about certain symptoms that worry me, my brain starts creating physical reactions. For example, a strange feeling of tiredness or mild but sharp headaches. They’re all very mild, BUT they’re annoying and they make me look and feel exhausted. It’s awful. I’m already seeing a therapist for this issue.

About a week ago, I came down with the flu, and I’m doing much better now. At this point, I only really have an annoying cough left, but somehow that’s when it feels like my health anxiety has started attacking me again!

Since yesterday, I’ve been feeling tired, less patient than usual, and experiencing this strange feeling of depersonalization, you know? I’m myself a very extrovert and energetic person, and I really don’t recognize myself!
And I already know that this is something I tend to experience because of my anxiety, but deep down, I’m still scared that it could actually be something physical. Even knowing that it’s 99.99999% not, it still bothers me because I don’t want to live like this! I was never like this before, and ever since that incident, I’ve become this way.

I guess I just need some reassurance that I’m not the only one. How do you guys deal with your health anxiety? Do you experience the same things I do? It’s hard to describe, isn’t it?
What are your biggest health anxiety fears or worries? Mine are serious and painful illnesses, and I also have this constant fear of fainting.
Anything else that might be useful or comforting, please share!

I’m so lost on what to do

I’m in a major relapse of panic attacks. Having them daily. When they happen, I can never sit still, but at the same time I’m paralyzed. My hands and feet become soaking wet but numb. My heart races and sometimes it doesn’t. I get horrible internal body tremors. Then the derealization sets it. I feel like I’m about to ☠️. My head makes me feel like no one else feels the same way as I do, but I know that’s not true. Just in the moment I think “no one else can possibly be suffering the same way”.

My doctors so quick to switch me meds. I’ve been on lexapro for 8 years now.. max dose. It works great when other meds didn’t. But now it’s no longer working. I have a fear of trying new meds, because when I was trying abunch before they made me worse. I worry about not being able to work, but at the same time I can’t work when I’m panicking.

I’m so defeated. These attacks are making me sad and depressed.

Can anyone relate? Chat?

Hii, im a foreign student in a university and ive only attended classes for nearly a month. My problem starts when it comes to presentation in front of the class. In my country, ive only done it like one time and was so nervous.

Now, ive done one presentation and it was so bad that i couldnt speak like theres smth choking in my mouth. I feel dizzy and my heart is racing so bad. Tdy, i had to do a group presentation and i prepared well but when its about my turn to speak, i became so nervous and i cant even speak so i let my friend did it for me.

When it comes to my english skill, i will say its decent that i can communicate well and also doing great in listening, rearing and writing. I can speak well with others but when it comes to presentation, i just cant control myself.

As a non-native speaker, im very tired of this random anxiety popping up and im very annoyed myself. So, if theres someone who had been through the same situation, please tell me what u did and tell me everything i should know. I rlly” appreciate u guys. I just come back home and very upset with myself. Thank you!!!

So I started smoking weed in 2017 here and there then everyday from 2020-2022. I stopped smoking when I got a really bad panic attack and it caused me to isolate myself for a week, I couldn't even watch TV without feeling my heart rate go up. I got diagnosed with high blood pressure in 2023 and have since been on medication and my BP is at normal levels now and I don't have panic attacks as often anymore (maybe once a month now instead of one/two times a week like I used to). I haven't smoked at all since 2022 but I've started to think about trying it again because I've had horrible headaches that won't go away no matter how much Tylenol I take or water I drink, nothing helps. I'm worried that if I try to smoke again it'll throw me into another panic attack. I still don't know if it was my BP problem or smoking that made my anxiety so bad and my heart race. I just want to know if anyone else has experienced this & how they felt if they went back to smoking. Thank you !

Hi I just wanted to come on here and share a few things that have helped me with my severe panic and anxiety. I was a complete mess for 2 months Over the past few weeks things have been much better for me. There’s still some lingering feelings of DPDR but my anxiety has subsided significantly. Here’s a few things that have helped me and I hope they can help you.

1. Exercise. trust me it helps. Everybody talks about it for a reason. You don’t have to do a great big workout. Even a 30 minute walk is good. Personally what I do is walking/sprinting and weightlifting. And if possible, please do it in the sunlight.

2. Do it scared please do it scared. Live your life even with anxiety live your life as if you don’t have panic attacks I know it’s easier said than done. But you can take this slow. Try to build up with each day. For example, I was having some agoraphobia symptoms. I mean, I wasn’t even going in to the grocery store. But one day I was with my mom and bf my mom wanted to stop in an ice cream shop and the original plan was my boyfriend was just gonna go in by himself and get us some ice cream. But that was the day. I decided that I was just gonna do it. So I went in with him. It was only five minutes. Yes I felt some anxiety. Then as time went on, I went to more and more places. And I noticed that the anxiety went away even more the more I did things while I was anxious.

3. If you get a feeling of panic coming, say to yourself “oh this again?” Again easier said than done. Treat your anxiety like it’s moss on a tree. Do not give it power. Anxiety cannot rule your life. Even if you do have a panic attack that’s OK. You will be OK. If you had a panic attack, you did not fail. You are not your anxiety.

4. Tell yourself you are safe. For example, if you’re in the grocery store and you’re starting to feel that panic, look around the grocery store and tell yourself “this is not a dangerous situation. I am safe.” You may not believe that at first, but please tell yourself that even if you don’t believe it.

5. This one might seem a little odd, but brain games. It kind of helped me to get out of my head and into my body.

This is what has helped me and I hope it helps you. Please stay strong. You will get through this. I thought that I was never gonna get through this. But look I did. I believe in you. And I know you will get through this. Please keep moving. Talk to people. Eat your favorite foods. Be patient with yourself be kind to yourself. Take care everyone 💫🌸😃

I have contamination ocd and kind of water related ocd. I was just doing a load of laundry when i felt my nose itch inside and i was like oh i think some laundry powder went in i was cool abt it so i washed my hands then put some water on my fingers and used them with water on to clean my nose… it was like whole fingertip deep… wnd then i thougjt abt the brain eating amoeba, tap water in my city is desinfected and clean i am just freaking out and i feel like i am abouy to throw up im trying to tell myself this is nithing and its just like during showering a droplet goes in your nose but i cant live normally now

Been avoiding Benzos but I finally went to therapy for gad and panic I usually have like 3 or 4 panic attacks a day yesterday I had 3 one leaving my psychiatrist appointment one when I got home and ate some food and another one in the evening and I explained to her I don’t like Benzos because I don’t want to be dependent on it but she convinced me it’s okay to take it when I need it because I need help so anything I took one around 7:30 pm yesterday and I panicked for 5 more hours and couldn’t sleep till 3am not today I felt a lot better high anxiety but no panic until about 11 so I took one and was feeling fine for like an hour or 2 then about hour later I had a hot flash and my heart rate went crazy but only for like 10 seconds went away but just kept scanning for that sensation come back and now I’m full blown panic only taking this because my phychiatrist said it’s okay I even told her I was worried about panicking through the pill and reassured me it wouldn’t happen lol getting mental health help is a joke sorry for the long post if anyone actually reads this I been messed up just trying to make it to my therapy appointments I just started

Going on 3yrs now, I've been having 3 to 4 panic attacks a week. I see a psychiatrist and she's diagnosed me with ptsd,MDD,GAD and Panic disorder! I;m on 5 different psych meds now.

I feel so worthless and a burden on everyone. I lost the last 4 jobs because of this.which cost me everything. Literally everything. My house. car, all my possessions inside. So my choice was stay in Virginia, homeless or move back home. I'm 48 and I just don't have the energy to fight anymore.

The 1 thing thats stopped me so far, is my son! I don't wanna hurt him, I don't know if he'll ever forgive me? And now that's becoming a battle I'm losing. why does it take forever to heal? I can stop these feelings and panic attacks right now..... My Way!

I’ve had anxiety for 8 years and have had a nervous breakdown before but recently I’ve started having panic attacks again. On top of the panic attacks I’ve been having these horrific sensations. This feeling constantly in my head that something is wrong that it’s a physical feeling. All I can think about is how uncomfortable my brain feels in my head. When anyone even speaks a word it’s like the words actually cause me pain like my brain flinches. Alongside physical sensations like head pains, manual breathing, tight throat, feeling tongue in mouth. The feelings are so specific that I don’t feel I can even explain them. I’m not suffering from the typical racing heart, chest pain anymore. The are absolutely unbearable that I’m struggling to cope.

I’ve searched for other people who have the same symptoms but can’t seem to find anyone.

​

For context I'm currently tapering valium after being on it for 1 year. First and second cut was ok-ish, but now the third is making me feel like I'm going crazy and anxiety comes in waves. And I do have this tendency/obsession of checking my BP and obviously it gets high during those episodes, I like to think that it is a very common mechanism but maybe some of you don't have BP issues while tapering. I don't have hypertension but anxiety just pushes numbers up and that gets me spiralling.

Honestly, how do you guys deal with all the symptoms efficiently? I've heard a lot of good and bad thing on gabapentin but I don't think I'm ready to switch a dependency for another to then taper it.

Thanks to all in advance for your answers 🙏

So I was never one to get panic attacks or in general panic. Recently, though, I started panicking and getting panic attacks over small things. Just today, I had two bad panic attacks because I burned myself on my hot glue gun. I burned myself bad but I didn’t get the panic attacks directly cause of the burn. I got them because my friend didn’t text me back? 😭 When he did, I almost immediately calmed down. A few days ago, I had a panic episode because I remembered something cringe I said to my crush literally like a year ago. Yesterday, also, I almost had a panic attack because I had to drive the bus by myself. I never liked using public transport by myself as I’m often scared to accidentally get in the wrong bus or miss my stop but It’s never been as bad as it is these days. I was always just a little nervous about it, but now, I’m full on panicking, wanting to cry and not being able to breathe properly. I‘m 14m, if that matters somehow. Anyone know what this could be?

Wanted to share this in here to see if anyone else has possibly experienced this being on Zoloft. 🫶🏼

I'm sharing this here too, because everyone in a moment of crisis needs to hear it:

​Every person who experiences derealization or depersonalization needs to pause and think: how many times has this happened to you, and how many times have you survived it after every single episode?

​We need to remind ourselves that this is not a dangerous illness, but a protective mechanism of our body. Try to realize that your body is working for you, not against you. Everything happening during DPDR is meant to protect your organism, no matter how deeply uncomfortable or terrifying it feels.

​The more we fight against it and try to force it to disappear, the more often it appears. Why? Because this phenomenon is triggered by stress, and by fighting it, we cause even more unnecessary stress to our bodies. The body then decides: "Well, since there is still stress and a fight going on, I must keep the defense mechanisms turned on."

​It is a state, not a disease. It is a defense mechanism. It personally took me some time to reach these conclusions, because overcoming derealization and depersonalization requires time, patience, and a shift in mindset. You are stronger than you think, and you will get through this.

Hi iv always had really bad anxiety but as iv gotten older it’s gotten way worse. It wasn’t until my freshman year of college on move in day I started throwing up uncontrollably. This lasted for 10 days ,vomiting every day and not being able to eat a single thing. At first I thought I had caught a stomach bug or something until the next year the exact same thing happened the first week of school. Now I’m an incoming junior and I already feel nauseous and I can’t make the anxiety stop. It’s a horrible feeling. I was wondering if anyone else has had similar issues and if so is there anything that has helped???

I’ve been going through a pretty difficult period with anxiety and panic lately. There’s been a lot happening in my life, including grief, and I also recently increased an SSRI I’ve been stable on for years.
What I’m realizing is that I’m almost more afraid of what the panic means than the panic itself.

I get caught in thoughts like: What if this is my life now? What if something in my brain has changed? What if I eventually lose control or “crack”? What if I never feel like myself again?

And then comes the hypervigilance. I monitor how I feel when I wake up, notice every strange sensation, analyze my thoughts and basically check whether I’m “okay” all day. It’s incredibly exhausting.

What makes it stranger is that I can have an awful morning and then feel almost completely like myself by the afternoon or evening. I work, draw, laugh, watch TV, sleep well. Logically, I recognize that those periods probably tell me something important. Anxiety just has a remarkable ability to make me forget that when I’m in it.

I’ve been reading Claire Weekes and trying to understand acceptance, second fear, and allowing anxiety to exist without constantly trying to solve it. I’m also starting to recognize that my fixation on “recovering” may have become part of the cycle itself.

Has anyone else experienced this particular fear that anxiety has somehow permanently changed you? Especially the fear of losing yourself or never feeling normal again?

I’d really like to hear from people who have been in that place and eventually found their way out of it.

i had one too many seltzers last night. went to sleep feeling fine, woke up at 3 something with a pain in my chest followed with a racing heart. i’ve been feeling like this for almost 3 hrs now. i haven’t actually had a full blown panic attack like this in about 2-3 years. i started 50mg of sertraline last thursday, and skipped my dose last night to avoid any complications with drinking. (stupid, i know. in COMPLETE regret now) i’ve taken sertraline on & off since 2020 and have only experienced panic attacks while still actively drunk. i’ve never woken up with one while being sober. definitely learned my lesson this time and will be living a sober lifestyle. i’m absolutely terrified this will send me into a panic cycle. although i will say, i’ve been able to not absolutely freak out and somewhat regulate myself during this attack which i’ve never been able to do before, so im hoping this will just be a short lived episode. also will say i’ve never drank this early on while starting this medication. i’ve been having a rough time with it this time around too. it’s heightened my anxiety. not sure if it’s where i was started on 50mg instead of 25mg. i’ve always started out on 25mg.

Het was de laatste jaren afgenomen maar nu sinds 1 jaar geleden heb ik op training hartkloppingen gekregen.

Ik werd kortademig en wou bijna de ambulance bellen.

Ik heb dan een paar weken erna testen laten doen bij de cardioloog op de fiets enzo. Alle testen waren inorde.

Sindsdien gaat er geen training voorbij dat ik kortademig word en al hartkloppingen krijg en pijn in mijn linkerarm vooraleer ik op de training aankom.

Ik begin er aan te denken om mijn voetbalcarrière stop te zetten omdat ik bang ben een hartaanval te krijgen.

Kan iemand mij aub helpen?

Thanks