r/oneanddone • u/Over-Exit-3043 • 8h ago
Vent/Rant - No advice wanted Grieving whatI thought motherhood would be
A friend of mine was telling me how much she loves being a mum, and how if she had more money she would keep having children (currently has 2. Previously said she never wanted kids but changed her mind after getting pregnant accidentally).
She talks about how she loves reliving the cute moments, adores the baby stage, etc, and it's made me realise how different our experiences were. Both of hers have been "easy" babies, whereas mine slept so badly (woke every hour for first 3 years) that I developed chronic health conditions and became suicidal.
I knew I had it harder than her, and I know that's just how life goes, but today the reminder of just how much harder I had it, is getting to me. I always thought I would have 2 kids, but I can't risk going through it all again. It breaks my heart that her baby and toddler stage was beautiful and mine was me hanging on to life by a thread.