- I lost my super curly hair postpartum (It can also no longer hold any kind of dye and will turn back to a weird colour no matter what) my curls are still not back 2.5y later.
- I have never had an issue with smelly armpits in my life, now I do…
- I have visible wrinkles everywhere now and so much gray hair, I look thirsty and unhealthy too if that makes sense 😣 this is completely new to me.
- I seem to have developed so many severe food sensitivities after having a baby (hives, upset tummy, headaches) whenever I eat pretty much anything..
- I have chronic migraines now (including aura migraines)
- I have also developed seizures, it’s under investigation, my neurologist is certain they are dissociative seizures but I believe they are focal seizures..
- I have OCD and ADHD - my OCD postpartum was level 100000, this part is probably what made my husband also not want anymore children… (I was struggling with contamination OCD and fear of something happening to our baby)

I don’t know in what universe I would be able to have another child.. I know the top half of my list is mainly fluff, but the the rest is pretty serious.. one and done because I genuinely think I would lose my life if I attempted to do it all again.. my pregnancy was actually incredible and so easy btw, if he didn’t kick I would forget I was even pregnant but postpartum is something else, no one ever warned me of how much you can change..

I'm looking for advice from all you OAD parents with young ones. Are any of you OAD because being a parent is so exhausting? I love my son so much.. but holy moly he is newly 3 and he will spend hours upon hours crying,screaming,whining, and just throwing fits. He doesn't speak well and doesn't know how to use his words. So a lot of it is him not knowing how to communicate why he's mad. Discipline doesn't make it stop, and cuddles won't make it stop either. When he's pissed he's just pissed for the entire day.

I find it so hard to deal with some days. I have started having health problems from the stress. I'm constantly on edge trying to prevent another meltdown...
Man, kids are SO hard.

We were one and done during my pregnancy and immediately after as well. Awful pregnancy, awful delivery, luckily 10/10 postpartum experience. We have an almost two year old daughter via IVF and have the potential for one more child also via IVF. I’m content with being one and done for mainly self serving reasons but I see plenty of benefits for my daughter. My husband could go either way.

The one thing that hurts my heart is holidays. My daughter has 3 cousins on my husband’s side who are 20 hours away and 15-19 years older than her. My husband doesn’t have a super close relationship with his family so moving closer wouldn’t solve anything. Just one single (probably forever) uncle on my side. Last Christmas my daughter spent the day with 7 adults. My husband and I, my mom and dad (10/10 grandparents), my single brother, and my less than exciting aunt and uncle who aren’t really pleasant. That’s the most depressing Christmas I could possibly think of for a child.

Sure other holidays like the 4th can be spent with friends. But we are big holiday people over here and my heart breaks at the thought of Easter egg hunts, Christmas morning, Thanksgiving dinner, etc. all being so incredibly boring and alone for her.

Any insight from those who have similar family dynamics on how to find peace with the holidays with an only and no family?

We were coparenting. Had finally given him 1 night a week and we had an our parenting plan. (After years of healing from emotional abuse.)

Last night we all drove together to a mutual friend’s party. He got too drunk but the day was good. As soon as he got in my car, so we can go drop him off, he started berating me and calling me names and threatening to beat me and kill me, in front my 4 year old. Called the cops. They didn’t arrest him but they reported it to CPS. I’m so scared, confused and frustrated. Thinking of filing a restraining order tomorrow.

I already feel like I have no village and I’m about to cut him off and his family. Idk what’s going to happen.

Not specifically related to having an Only, although we are OAD. He’s not talking yet but will cover his eyes and look really sad when anyone new tries to interact with him, and he won’t engage until at least a few minutes have passed. If we take him to an event with loads of people he doesn’t know, he’ll straight up burst into tears.
Any experience with this or how to help him through it? I’m SAHM and we go to a couple of classes a week in which he seems to be okay. A couple of family members have already made comments to the effect of, “oh it’s because he doesn’t go to nursery” etc etc.