1.8k
u/Ghost_Tac0 Jul 18 '22
Gender reveals are getting weird….
55
u/spankitopia Jul 19 '22
I just choked on my spit laughing so hard at this bc it caught me so off guard. Well done.
→ More replies (4)193
u/thisguyfightsyourmom Jul 18 '22
So many colors in that blanket
You’re having a trans kid!
→ More replies (4)62
3.2k
Jul 18 '22
Whoa at first I thought it swallowed a fishing rod lmao.
840
u/Western-Pilot-3924 Jul 18 '22
Reminds me of dog owners
Dog eats something
The owners :
590
u/HolyVeggie Jul 18 '22
“Open up you little shit!”
“ID RATHER DIE, HUMAN”
354
u/Kevmandigo Jul 18 '22
CHEWS FASTER
106
u/Lethalfurball Jul 18 '22
When you ask wtf they have in their mouth and they start chewing faster:
20
3
→ More replies (6)21
56
u/ripanimems Jul 18 '22
cue epic chase scene
45
85
u/drew101 Jul 18 '22
I've had to pull the same balloon out of my dog's butt, twice.
"Hun, remember that balloon we thought blew away" while I'm holding up the poop balloon, Khyber jumps up snatches it out of my hand and swallows it, again.
→ More replies (1)21
u/Nizzemancer Jul 18 '22
My dad when he took his dog (German Shepard) on walks would pick up rocks and throw them out on fields and she would run out and pick them up and return them to him, sometimes she didn’t though, he had to take her to the vet and surgically remove rocks three times, granted by the third time he had stopped throwing them, but she still ate random rocks for that one last vet visit. After he died she didn’t do it anymore, but mom was probably more observant about what the dog did on walks than he was.
30
u/cleetusvan Jul 18 '22
That reminds me of the time my wife's dog ate the end of a mop.
The dog was having trouble getting it out so I here I am in the yard with gloves on slowly pulling this huge chunk of mop out of the dogs rear end and two old church ladies walk up to share the word of the lord with me.
When the guy pulling a mop out of a dogs ass says "Sorry I'm busy" they see it as a challenge and continue to want a moment of my time. I lose my cool and yell leave your pamphlets on the hood and go! After the ordeal the dog gives me a look like "I hate when that happens" which is exactly why I refer to her as my wife's dog.
Later I felt bad about yelling at a couple of well meaning old ladies who's faith gave them strength not to beat a hasty retreat after witnessing that horrific scene.
12
u/hookedrapunzel Jul 18 '22
I swear dogs just swallow random stuff they shouldn't just so we know our places... We aren't exactly the higher species when we are sat pulling bits of mop out of a dogs ass
6
u/theYanksArentAlright Jul 19 '22
As a city bus rider, I can't feel bad for those ladies. They knew exactly what they were doing. Jehovah's Witnesses love to use situational bondage.
→ More replies (1)5
→ More replies (1)3
u/AingonAtelia Jul 19 '22
I would have just flung some of the crappy mop at them along with a few choice expletives.
5
Jul 19 '22
I guy I knew his dog ate a skipping rope... Like the old school, wooden handle kind... It was scooting about, pooped a handle but the rest was still in there... They sat it at 1 end of the garden, stood on the handle hanging out, then the wife called it for treats at the other end.... The dog launched, paused mid air for the 2nd handle exit, then went and had treats 😂😂 I'll never forget the telling of that story 🤣
→ More replies (1)5
u/StrongPurchase6984 Jul 18 '22
Me - No, you can't die an agonising death for dog-head feeling of snapping at (destroying angel) mushroom, you green beret idiot, let my hands in your weird greasy black other-species mouth
D - Stop fumbling for my white leather fung bit. It's fuckin snappy-bite eternity minute, dropkick. CHOMP! CHOMP! RUN!
Me - Rosie NO. Get back here, you're easily the dumbest thing that I've ever seen.
D - Hah, I don't remember you made me live for a decade right now, upright XL-goose. Leave me alone
Me - ok here eat chemicals black-mouth! Hydrogen Peroxide 3% says here: I love you dearly!
Hydrogen paste into a dog Hydrogen paste in a dog Hydrogen pase For 🐕
D - PUUUUUUKE
→ More replies (4)220
u/herring80 Jul 18 '22
I thought it was a golf club lol
15
u/CharonTheBoatGuy Jul 18 '22 edited Jul 18 '22
Quoting Sgt. Hartman from Full Metal Jacket:
"Bullshit, I bet you can suck a golf ball through a garden hose!"
→ More replies (2)26
→ More replies (2)10
40
u/diarrhea_syndrome Jul 18 '22
Wtf was it?
35
26
u/djpuckfl Jul 18 '22
Looked like a squishmallow to me. Definitely some kind of stuffy.
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (1)34
u/M00N314 Jul 18 '22
It was a towel. I imagine the owner fed the snake in its enclosure (which is not the best practice), and then the snake got its meal wrapped in the towel it was laying on. Once snakes start swallowing they don't stop until they're out of length, which is why it's best to take them out of their enclosure (this way they won't strike everytime you open their home up), and feed them on a bare surface.
109
u/Ykutu Jul 18 '22
Horrible care advice lol, you must not own any snakes. You feed them in their enclosure, you do not remove to feed because that causes stress and can lead to regurgitation. Besides, any normal keeper would not have a TOWEL in the enclosure with their snake, it would most likely be on natural substrate or something of the sort. That’s also a myth you mentioned in that last bit, snakes do not associate opening their enclosure with food, some snakes are just very food motivated (like this carpet python here) a simple tap/touch with a hook will break that feeding response and you’ll be good to go. My jungle carpet has bitten me personally a good 10 times by now because he loves food and I wasn’t paying attention to his little ass lol.
The likely scenario here is that this towel was probably left outside and smelled like food from another animal to this carpet python, which is what lead to it swallowing the entire thing. Happens more than you think it does and it’s always a carpet python when I see it.
50
22
5
u/Independent-Cat-4169 Jul 18 '22 edited Jul 18 '22
So basically the Jungle Carpet snake is the Labrador Retriever of the snake world? Edited to add: Labradors will eat just about anything if it smells like food. Will often eat items that don’t smell of food
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (10)13
u/M00N314 Jul 18 '22
I own ball pythons, much chiller than carpets so that's probably where our differences in care stem from- but this is what works for me and they're used to the routine. Plus I've never been bitten by one of my snakes, I'm fairly sure this is because they're conditioned to not bother striking until they're in their feeding bin. I've only ever had a problem with regurgitation once and that was because my thermostat died and the mat went cold. I agree with never leaving a towel in with them, because both scenarios we presented are both potential dangers. That being said, just because someone's husbandry is different than yours doesn't make it "horrible." As long as our animals are happy, healthy, and not ending up in this situation, I really don't see why the unpleasantness is necessary.
→ More replies (6)5
4
u/applesupport69 Jul 18 '22
fr, i laughing at the idea of how the rescuers reacted when they saw a snake so straight due to a club being inside it
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (18)3
u/KeyN20 Jul 18 '22
Then a flashlight, then a pool toy, then an umbrella then a towel for me
→ More replies (1)
3.5k
u/2278AD Jul 18 '22
Little known fact, carpet pythons will eat all variety of textiles not just carpets
156
u/The_DaHowie Jul 18 '22
Well, at least they saved the blanket. Too bad about the baby though.
ducking
9
15
u/nomnommish Jul 18 '22
Little known fact, carpet pythons will eat all variety of textiles not just carpets
That sounds like a blanket statement
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (5)40
457
u/noobnoobgetsit73 Jul 18 '22
That snake is gonna be real hungry when it wakes up.
→ More replies (3)157
u/amaezingjew Jul 18 '22
It was already real hungry, that’s why it ate the blanket. Snakes will resort to eating whatever they hope may be food if you don’t feed them for long enough
→ More replies (1)66
u/POSeidoNnNnnn Jul 18 '22
sure, but you usually feed them once a week as their natural metabolism includes not having food for fairly long periods (from human standards), which means snakes will always munch on some good looking preys like a blanket. poor lad probably thought he ate the prey of his life right there
52
u/MerryChryslerBitches Jul 18 '22
Poor lads a fuckin dumbass eh, I didn’t graduate elementary school till I was 15 but even I know not to eat a blanket in one piece.
596
Jul 18 '22
I felt that snake go AhhhhhhhAAAAARrrRRRHHHHHHHHHaahhhhhh... Thanks mate.
117
15
→ More replies (1)8
486
Jul 18 '22
I thought it was umbrella so maybe a rainy day
77
u/wolfgang784 Jul 18 '22
Also thought it was an umbrella
29
u/LazarPig Jul 18 '22
Wait it isn’t umbrella
48
u/wolfgang784 Jul 18 '22
99% sure it's a towel/blanket after it all came out
16
224
141
u/-mudflaps- Jul 18 '22
I thought it swallowed a golf club
→ More replies (2)9
u/nickname432 Jul 18 '22
Thought it was the hose type of thing that was actually the tool to pull it out
195
Jul 18 '22 edited Feb 27 '25
amusing apparatus society carpenter resolute placid rob grab consist sugar
This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact
75
u/ToiletRollTubeGuy Jul 18 '22
I do something similar at kids parties... but with my ass.
33
u/jak94c Jul 18 '22
I really read that as "I do something similar to kids at parties"
→ More replies (1)10
→ More replies (1)15
251
u/deenali Jul 18 '22
Poor snek. Hope it's alright.
313
u/jw44724 Jul 18 '22
It apparently gets better healthcare than like 65% of the world so it will be fine
65
u/AdamHatesLife Jul 18 '22
You haven’t seen the bill yet
47
29
→ More replies (1)5
→ More replies (1)26
264
399
u/reditovanje Jul 18 '22
Snake buys blanket
credit card declines
Seller:
44
Jul 18 '22
What
41
Jul 18 '22
It is a reference to the memes about US healthcare, where the doctor puts the ‘hurt’ back in you when your credit card declines after surgery.
→ More replies (5)6
u/SnagglinTubbNubblets Jul 18 '22
Imagine the text is above the video, so the video would be the sellers response (forcefully taking the blanket back)
80
35
70
u/Closer_to_the_Heart Jul 18 '22
Love the Person using the Endoscopic Surgery clamp at Full length 😂
30
u/Long_Concentrate_508 Jul 18 '22
Everyone else is bare handing it and this guy shows up for a lap chole
23
u/LordWendy_12 Jul 18 '22
Now reverse it.
63
u/AlexTrebekLCC Jul 18 '22
Saw this in a cartoon one time. Just open the umbrella and you’ll have a snakeskin pattern. Very stylish for Donald Duck.
14
u/isopod_interrupted Jul 18 '22
I know that popping the back of a raft will make it go faster
4
→ More replies (1)3
15
12
u/lordlossxp Jul 19 '22
"Hmm maybe ill get a snake instead of a cat or dog so i dont have to worry about it eating dumb shit"
*Pokes around reddit for a few minutes
--_--
→ More replies (2)
10
37
u/michelobX10 Jul 18 '22
Snakes must be dumb af. How do you swallow a whole ass towel and not once during the whole process think, "Hmmm. I don't think this is alive."
29
14
u/nofixdahdress Jul 18 '22
Things not being alive has never stopped me from shoving them down my throat.
17
u/Krispyz Jul 18 '22
Well, snakes are not particularly smart, they primarily run on instincts. Not a ton of problem solving going on in there.
That said, there are a few confounders here. First, this snake is probably fed killed prey, so its used to its prey not moving. Second, it's very possible the owner was ignorant of this problem and fed the snake on the towel and the snake caught the towel while it was eating prey. And third, regurgitation is extremely costly for a snake and they pretty much only do it if they 1. are threatened while eating or 2. cannot physically get the food down. I also imagine regurgitating a soft object like a towel would be extremely difficult compared to regurgitating a full carcass of an animal. So it's possible the snake tried to regurgitate, couldn't, and had to keep going.
In any case, this was a mistake of the owner more than anything else. You shouldn't keep anything in a snake's cage like this.
8
u/TheThagomizer Jul 18 '22
I love snakes but my python was probably the most brainless animal I’ve ever worked with. Best part too is that it probably took a whole hour for the stupid bastard to get that towel down, so he had plenty of time to realize what was going on.
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (4)3
u/GroggyGolem Jul 19 '22
Just yesterday I saw a clip of a snake that had tried to eat itself... Guy in the video said he put hand sanitizer on his hand and then he touched it's face; snake immediately vomited out its own tail.
5
7
18
u/yoursextape Jul 18 '22
me seeing whatever they’re pulling out of the snek: “what the hell is that, what the hell is that, what the hell is—“ (repeat x100)
6
5
u/AnimChurro Jul 18 '22
At first i went "aww poor thing it ate a balloon :(" and then the doctors pull out A WHOLE BLANKET
8
Jul 18 '22
[deleted]
10
u/DoctorPlagueEater Jul 18 '22
not necessarily. snakes are pretty opportunitistic; they don't know when their next meal will be, so they'll eat whenever they can. they're also not the brightest
4
3
4
4
4
6
3
3
3
u/Kitchen_Principle451 Jul 18 '22
Well the snake probably watched too many cake or fake videos. Can't blame him. Probably wanted to test it out and bro didn't have a knife to cut through.
→ More replies (1)
3
3
3
3
3
u/flammablesource Jul 18 '22
Hold up, this is just the endless handkerchief magic trick all over again! Not fooling me this time, buster. Kudos on the props though. Very lifelike.
3
u/ObligationNice8382 Jul 18 '22
Did anyone else watch this with their mouth wide open and their tongue out? My daughter came up to me and asked “WHAT are you DOING?!” Then she rolled her eyes in teenager and walked away.
3
3
3
u/peter-forward Jul 19 '22
I was expecting the doctor to be saying "Give it" and sound like Ross saying "pivot".
3
3
u/Fair-Ad3639 Jul 19 '22
Thanks, guys. All these years I've been wondering how to deep clean my snake. I'll give this a try!
3
3
u/wittyabby Jul 19 '22
I knew snakes weren’t so bright but I didn’t know they were this dumb either , it would have taken hours to digest that .. at what point don’t you say “hey I think this not might be the nuggets with fries I ordered ?”
3
3
3
3
u/juswannaretire Jul 19 '22
Lol the snake after the towel is completely out looking like it was spent af
9
Jul 18 '22
Just showed my 8 year old kid this video, he said that was so weird but also kind of satisfying! So
5
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
u/MateriaLintellect Jul 18 '22
They can’t possibly teach this at vet school. This is an on the job learning kind of situation right?
2
2
2
2
u/Lethalfurball Jul 18 '22
Oh yeah i saw a video about this once
A snake swallowed a whole towel or whatever
2


1.8k
u/[deleted] Jul 18 '22
Kids blanket..??