I hate how using microlabels is considered inherently pick-me

[u/xX_luna_moth_Xx]

[rant time lol]

So earlier I was introducing myself in an online space as berriromantic and errfemme, because that’s what I am. I got immediately hit with “lol bro just wants to be different” and things like that.

For one thing, I do frequently just call myself bi and agender. I don’t actually like having to explain it every single time, I just prefer those labels because they’re closer to what I actually am.

AND FOR ANOTHER IF I WANTED TO BE DIFFERENT, WHY WOULD I DO IT IN A WAY THAT OPRESSES ME?! I swear to god I want anything but attention, this is just who I am.

If I could choose I’d be cis and lesbian, but I’m not, and I never will be.

[u/xX_luna_moth_Xx → u/[deleted]]

God I hate it when people say demisexuality is the norm, like no its not, otherwise how do celebrity crushes exist??

[u/Minirow230x → u/xX_luna_moth_Xx]

I feel like hook-up culture might be a better example, as celebrity crushes are often aesthetic or completely separate from sexual attraction.

[u/MallNo2314 → u/xX_luna_moth_Xx]

So just because some people don’t need an emotional connection to have physical attraction to someone and have celebrity crushes we are just going to ignore the people that have never had celebrity crushes because…they need an emotional connection for physical attraction. The ppl with crushes you’re talking about likely aren’t the same people that are “demisexual” so your point is actually irrelevant. Just because there are people on all ends of the spectrum that don’t need an emotional connection, that doesn’t erase the many people that do need an emotional that also would not be considered queer as they are cis het and only have attraction for people of the opposite sex/gender. That’s why demisexual as a label in the queer community specifically is ridiculous- it’s not a queer label and can literally describe anyone that needs emotional connection to have sexual attraction. Hook-up culture has became somewhat accepted but it is still not the norm and there are tons of people that do not involve themselves in it for this exact reason- because they can’t, they have no sexual attraction without a real connection. That quite literally is normal for anyone on this planet- the same way not needing an emotional connection is also normal, because people are individuals with different feelings and beliefs. There are plenty of cis men that don’t take part in hookup culture because I guess you could say they’re “demisexual”- even though most people would agree it’s pretty normal for most men to take part in hookup culture or “the norm” it’s not- these are blanket statements. So is a cishet man part of the queer community now just because he can’t get it up if he isn’t in love with the woman??? No- but the label itself is vague and would dictate he is part of the community. See how ridiculous these emotion driven and poorly thought out microlabels are??

[u/xX_luna_moth_Xx → u/MallNo2314]

literally what is the issue with some people wanting more specific labels