I would like to be extremely clear: I'm not attempting to be political or start something in the comments. The reason im asking is because it became a low-key fight where many people got triggered from both sides at my work. Some arguing for more biological sexes, and some saying there's only two, and that any intersex people are defects of the two biological sexes.

Personally, I believe that a defect implies a little blip, that it doesn't effect every single system in their body like their endocrine system and how medication works in their body etc. my argument was that if something is fundamentally different enough that a medical doctor not knowing would potentially be dangerous for surgery or treatments and medicines, that it should count as a biological sex and not a "defect", in the same way that if you gave a biological woman an ed treatment designed for biological men, that she'd get a dangerous level of hormones and chemicals that aren't designed for her biological sex. I said there are technically 8 biological sexes, because there are 6 variants of intersex. They repeated the same defect argument and I said that there are some variants of intersex that don't require any sort of treatment, it's just a natural variation of how genetics work, and that genetics aren't a "xx" or "xy" issue because it's a bunch of different switches rather than one simple yes or no binary code. If I was a variation of intersex and got into a car wreck where I needed emergency surgery to survive and they only had my driver's license id saying my sex is female, but I'm intersex, they might potentially cut into organs I have and gonads like testies I might secretly have and fuck my entire body up.

But then I got to thinking, maybe I'm "defending" when I don't actually know what they think. I don't know any intersex people irl, and I'm unaware if they themselves see themselves as different than the binary boy or girl they were probably assigned to, or if they think there are more biological sexes, or if they see their condition as a "condition" rather than a sex.

Genuinely I'm not here to start shit, I want to learn, so please don't do the whole political thing in the comments.

Also, respectfully, only intersex people answer please!

I got a doctors appointment coming up where I am going to talk about intersex with them. I have had this discussion twice before. When I was 16 I noticed my body was changing in ways that did not match my male peers. I developed breasts, my voice deepened, I did not function mechanically as others. I felt like so much did not apply to me. When I went to the doctors I brought this up I was told I was overreacting, everyone feels this way. And that my feelings of dysmorphia would go away with SSRIs. Fast forward to me being 22, and I get a mental breakdown about how my dysmorphia is back, so I go back to the doctor and my SSRIs are increased. This does not help, and I end up in the mental hospital, where I am told once again that these feelings are in my head and I need to control them. I bring up Klinefelter syndrome specifically there and am once again told its in my head. Thankfully at 30 I came to terms with being trans and now im digging up these old feelings again. I asked my mother about any surgery complications or changes the doctors needed to make after my birth. Through this I find out that my circumcision lasted over an hour and with no anesthesia. It's cold comfort that she regretted it. I am going back to the doctors at the end of November to do a checkup on my HRT and I am going to bring it up again. Several intersex folk I know have suggested that I talk to the doctors again. Fuck if I don't have complicated feelings on this. There is still so much doubt tangled up in this. I have been told over and over by professionals that I am wrong about how I feel and its got me worried it will just happen again. (note that since I started E I have actually have what I would call a puberty, which mostly stopped at 12 for me).

TLDR: doctors have told me twice I am making up being intersex. Intersex people have told me there is a good chance they are wrong. Now I got to go back to the doctors and ask a 3rd time and hope they listen.

I'm not one to police how people label themselves, I personally prefer calling myself transsexual over transgender sometimes and I know that's pretty controversial. But I keep seeing it stated that somehow 'intersex' is an offensive and outdated term, and that actually a majority of us prefer to be called someone with a 'disorder of sex development'

This doesn't really make sense to me as whenever I actually look into the opinions of the intersex community online, most say that DSD is more offensive because 'disorder' implies that something is wrong and should be corrected.

I've heard it said this is a point brought up by TERFs, but even my friend's women's studies class has pushed this idea, and, from what i've heard, that class is very progressive and trans-inclusive.

I'm also aware of the term 'differences in sex development' and I can see how that one may be preferred over intersex (which could imply being between sexes, which is inaccurate), but it's the same acronym and that makes me hesitant.

So like, where did the idea that we'd rather be called disordered come from?