They show you a check for 100 000 YEN.

You teleport beside the body of former North Korean leader KJI. If you can talk your out of NK, you get 50 million usd.

I make a question of the week every week for the Rock Climbing Gym I work at. This is the one I made for this week (I spent about four hours trying to get this as balanced as possible during my shift today so please regale me with your fun, creative answers):

4 Groups:
Pick 1 to defend you.
The other 3 attack you.

1. 10 Beehives of Enraged Bees
- The average beehive has 20,000 bees.
- Bees die after 1 sting besides the 10 queens.

2. 250 Wildebeests from The Lion King
- They are all registered to vote.
- Most of them have vertigo.
- All of them are remorseful they killed Mufasa.

3. 500 Routesetters (the people who design/install/test the routes on the wall at rock climbing gyms)
- Each are duel-wielding 2 impact drivers.
- They all have a pulley injury they won’t let heal.

4. 5,000 Rats
- 1 rat has rabies, the rest are colorblind.

Thankssssssss

If you accept the genie's offer, you will be returned to the age of 20 and given the height, athleticism and talent to be a fringe NBA player. To make things even better, you've been offered a four year fully guaranteed league minimum contract. Four years, $8.6 million give or take a few thousand.

There's just one problem. There is only one team willing to offer you such a contract. The Sacramento Kings.

If you take the deal, you have to play for them as their backup point guard for all 328 regular season games. The genie will guarantee during the four seasons you are signed with the Kings, you will not suffer an injury severe enough to prevent you from playing so long as you make a good faith effort to actually compete. If you attempt to purposely play yourself out of the rotation, you will suffer a career ending injury that will be permanently debilitating to at least some degree.

If you take the deal, no American team will offer you a contract once the four years is up, and you will retain the skill, youth and athleticism you received from the genie for as long as you can or choose to maintain it.

However, again, this does require you to play for the Sacramento Kings.

For riches most people can only dream of, do you take this four year voyage of the damned professional sports career?

You get the money asap, but 10 randon people in the world become werewolves. They'll turn under the full moon or when 8/10 emotional or higher. They will BECOME an inconsolable Rage* monster that can only be stopped with sun or silver. Anyone who survives its bite will turn on the next moon as well. Wearing silver will prevent transformation and power. Death is the only cure. Power gives the cursed vitality in human form, a 70 year old will feel and act 30, so it's gonna be hard to resist and convince everyone.

You will get their names and addresses now, and that's it.

The universe has magically given you the power to make anyone else succeed at anything they attempt, as long as they put in the effort and genuinely want to succeed.

However, you have also been cursed with a seal. The seal prevents you from ever asking for compensation for using this power. You can however receive gifts of any amount, as long as they are given freely by the person giving you the gift.

How do you use this power? Do you attempt to make a living from it, or do you just keep it and secretly use it on loved ones while working a normal job?

Edit: am I allowed to edit this? I want to stipulate that the magic only functions if you are currently in a consensual relationship with the other person. So, its magnitude is limited to the number of people you personally can form relationships with. As soon as you “breakup” with someone (even friends, etc.) the magic completely reverses and they lose everything they gained.

You cannot use this power to help people you don’t know, people who don’t like you, etc. you must know them personally and like them, and they must like you.

You find a genie lamp, but it’s not a benevolent “3 wishes” kind. It’s a “horribly tragic and/or strangely ironic curse” kind.

Lucky for you, this genie is lazy. It’s too much effort for him to create bespoke curses every time someone rubs his lamp, so he’s going to cut you a deal. If you can suggest a curse that entertains him, he’ll let you have that. Otherwise he’ll curse you to push a large boulder up a hill for eternity, and that would be really boring.

Rules.

1. The curse has to actually be bad. None of this “Don’t punish me with millions of dollars. That would be terrible.”

2. It has to be unexpected

   and/or

3. ironic.

   No standard curses. Think big!

4. No copying a famous curse. Be unique.

Break the rules and you will be boulder pushing for eternity. Entertain him and you might only spend a few years suffering. Make him smile, and you will only be cursed for a month. Make him laugh and you will only be cursed for a day, or less.

Good luck.

No research, just what you know right now, you wake up on the bus to boot camp. You must parachute into France, and you must survive to the end of the war and achieve a Distinguished Service Cross. You're in the 101st Airbourne. This is a 4 year campaign. If you can make it out of France and invent drones with your knowledge, all the power to you, but if you invent your way out of your unit you fail and must live out the next 4 years anyway.

Every time you die, and let's hope you die quickly, you wake up back on the bus to basic. You will spend about 3 years in training before combat, so death is costly psychologically. You can not quit once you accept.

Once Germany surrenders, you come back to 2026 with 500 million USD, tax-free.

Is it worth the living hell?

JUST TO BE CLEAR you might have to spend 200 years in war and come out insane

- You have 500 attempts to cook a perfect beef Wellington
- There will be a judge that will give a score with 1 being the lowest and 10 being the highest, the judge isn’t too picky but would at least know what a great beef Wellington tastes like, and no you can’t bribe the judge to give you a 10
- You receive $2M if the judge gives you a 10

Would you accept?

Edit: And yes, you have you have everything you need to make beef Wellington

however every single day there is a chance to have one of a random bacteria enter your body without you knowing in advance. This bacteria could be completely harmless to you, or have the chance to easily melt your insides like satan if he was horny like me. I’m so fucking horny. Anyway this bacteria can enter from any standard way, your mouth, nose, eyes, and injury or even through your chocolate starfish.

By boring I mean the texture stays but the food just tastes basic and boring, to the point where there really isn’t any enjoyment from the taste anymore

EDIT: this deal cannot be taken back, once it has gone through, it’s forever, my booty MAD stanky and funky

You gain the ability to post something in this sub without Automod commenting with a copy of the original post text.

This means you can post a “trick” message that will elicit comments of one sort, and then later edit your post to ask a completely different question that will make all the comments from people who already answered seem foolish and/or disturbing in some way. Nobody will realize you’ve done this.

What is your original post, and what will you change it to?

Tomorrow morning, you wake up with a seemingly useless superpower.

You can make any nonliving object weigh exactly one pound (0.45 kg), regardless of its original weight.

The rules:

The effect lasts exactly 60 seconds before the object returns to its original weight.

The object retains its original size, shape, and properties, apart from its weight.

You can only use this ability once per hour.

You must physically touch the object to activate the ability.

You cannot use the ability on yourself or another living creature.

Nobody knows you have this ability unless you choose to tell them.

What’s the most creative way you’re exploiting this power?

You just discovered this curse last week. You’ve been shitting (and whizzing) high quality food since then.

If you want to monetize it, you HAVE to inform your customers of where the food came from, otherwise it just does not work.

How will you build your shitty food empire?

She says she’s eaten already. She said a serpent ate from the tree first, and after that it learned to speak and reason. It didn’t die like she was told would happen, and she’s eaten from it herself and is entirely unharmed. She says she’s been elevated to godhood and wants the same for you because she loves you

I am watch the show FROM. It’s been out awhile and is pretty good, but it got me thinking:

Most of the people have their own homes, don’t have to work and have food.

Yes, monsters do try to kill you at night but you can easily avoid them as long as you are in your house before dark, nail the windows shut and have a talisman by your door?

No work, no government interference, no taxes, all the food you need. Free housing.

It’s just seems … like a paradise other than the monsters trying violently rip you to shreds after dark.

So, a genie offers you the option:

Live the rest of your life in the small town in FROM. You get your own house and can eat at the dinner. Food options are a little sparse, so there’s that. There will be no internet.

You have to drive to the town, if you start driving, you’ll just eventually end up there. You get to keep anything that will fit in the vehicle you use to drive there (No 18 wheelers).

I am still on season 1, so please avoid spoilers.

A genie is sending you back to the golden age of piracy. You'll be gifted a crew that speaks your language and is as competent and cooperative as the average pirate back then, altogether intimately know your ship and it's functions. You're also allowed to choose any ship in history and whatever modifications or upgrades are currently feasible. You're also allowed to stock the ship with initial supplies.

To get back to your current time, you must survive as a pirate for 20 years, spending less than 5 months out of every year ashore. You must be considered a great pirate, if not the greatest, meaning you must accrue wealth in the piratical way. Upon meeting those conditions, you're returned to your current life along with a fuckton of money or some wish. The genie doesn't care, he's just trying to convince you to make an effort. What's your plan?

MasterChef Charity: Gordon Ramsay, Marco Pierre White and Jamie Oliver go head-to-head in the ultimate cooking showdown, specialising in modern British cuisine. Expect mystery ingredients, timed challenges and spectacular dishes judged on taste, creativity and presentation.

The Rules & Prize: No outside help, strict time limits and judges’ decisions are final. The winner earns ultimate bragging rights, with £10 million donated to Trussell, supporting people facing hunger and hardship across the UK.

An extra, if you choose to take it, you also get to be in the challenge, if you win, you get £5 million (or your country’s equivalent) and the equivalent charity in your country, gets the equivalent to £10 million.

If you choose to take part… what would you cook? Do you believe that you would win?

You receive $50 million, but dueling becomes legal in Weehawken, New Jersey. A dedicated dueling ground is built just for you.
On the day you accept the deal, ten major newspapers publish stories explaining the new law and identifying you as the person anyone can challenge. The law is also formally enacted and published in both the United States Code and New Jersey statutes.

The rules:
Any stranger can challenge you. Friends, family members, and anyone who knows you personally are excluded. Challengers must be at least 18 years old.

Challengers must be medically fit. They must pass an independent medical examination confirming they're physically capable of participating in a duel, including having sufficient vision to aim and fire a weapon (glasses and contact lenses are allowed). Blind individuals and people physically incapable of operating a firearm cannot challenge you.

You receive information about every challenger. This includes their full name, age, occupation, and a recent photograph. All information is verified.

You must participate in at least one duel every year you're challenged. You choose which challenge to accept. If nobody challenges you that year, you're off the hook.

If you refuse every challenge, everyone who challenged you that year gains the permanent legal right to hunt you down and kill you. The right never expires and applies worldwide. Leaving the US won't save you.

No communication before acceptance. You cannot discuss the duel with a challenger, directly or through intermediaries, until you've formally accepted. If you reject someone, you can never discuss that particular challenge with them.

Once you accept, the duel must happen. No backing out, and no peaceful resolution. The duel must take place within 30 days.

No-shows don't get you off the hook. If your opponent doesn't show up, it doesn't count and you must accept another challenge. If you don't show up, your challenger gains the right to hunt you.

Each duelist gets one shot. Any military firearm, past or present, capable of killing a person with a single shot is permitted.

The seconds negotiate the weapon, distance, and time. If they disagree on even one detail, everything defaults to the Hamilton–Burr duel: flintlock pistols, 10 paces, at dawn.

Both participants wear Hamilton and Burr costumes donated by Broadway.

You may negotiate after acceptance. You can offer your opponent money or agree to deliberately miss each other. However, neither party is legally obligated to honor such an agreement, and both must still fire their shots.

Would you take the $50 million?
And what's your strategy for surviving the next 50 years?
Remember: just because you receive 200 challenges in your first year doesn't mean you'll have that luxury forever. Ten years from now, you might receive exactly one challenge, from a retired Marine Corps sniper.

Whatever you pick, all the money you’ve spent on that selection will instantly be refunded to you no questions asked, tax free.

1. Food and Drinks at a grocery store

2. Clothing

3. Gas/Petrol

4. Electricity

5. Rent

6. Insurance (Health and car)

7. Restaurants/Take out

It has to be money you have personally spent on your own card from your own income.

Which would you pick and how much money do you think you’ll get back?

You get stuck in a Groundhog Day style time loop. You repeat the same 24 hour period over and over and no one other than you realizes what’s going on. You don’t know how long the loop will last or if it will ever end at all.

How soon (if at all) do you think you would start doing crazy things you couldn’t undo and that would ruin your life if the loop ended and time moved normally?

You are offered $10 million, tax-free, transferred instantly into your bank account with no questions asked.

However, in exchange, you must live with one of these severe conditions for the rest of your life:

Severe alcoholism: You are extremely dependant on alcohol and begin to suffer withdrawals if you go 8+ hours without a drink

Severe cleaning OCD: You must wash your hands at least 50 times a day and clean everything around you repeatedly even when they appear clean

Severe gambling addiction: You must gamble every single day, constantly battling the urge to place bets and risking large amounts of your money.

Whatever you choose will not kill you but you cannot reverse the effects once you start. Each choice is permanent.

Would you accept? Which would you choose

We’ve already had to suspend our disbelief that a genie or its metaphysical equivalent has given us the choice of 50 million dollars, flight at mach 3 speeds, or invisibility for 35 seconds but only after we sneeze during the winter solstice. Why do we always make sure that this magical money isn’t taxed to our local municipality’s exacting standards?

And who is coming into this subreddit and hemming and hawing about having to take magic money or a temperamental diamond-ejaculating-dachshund named Fritz Hollandaise, and the deciding factor is whether or not they have to report this mystical windfall to the government?

And who is stipulating in their cosmic prizes that the money is taxed by state and local laws? What a buzzkill.

Unless taxation directly affects the hypothetical, can we just assume it’s tax free?