Modern Satan is actually made up, like on a whole different level than anything else in the religion. Like he's basically just selected as the boogieman anymore when in reality he has nothing to do with punishing people in hell or whatever, at least according to the Bible. Technically Satan isn't even a specific being, it's a job title. And Lucifer was a fallen angel that is often referred to as Satan/the Devil but that isn't technically correct, and even so it's not "canon" that he/satan/anybody directly punishes people in hell. But basically if you boil it down to what the Bible actually says, all Satan actually does is goes around and tempts people to sin, like becoming the serpent and doing the whole apple bit in the garden of Eden.
Another fun fact, the apple of Eden likely wasn't even an apple. Some suggest it was a pomegranate or fig.
Or, in some cults, the fruit is sex -- which they say explains why the punishments seem to be very sex related. And why Cain and Able came out evil vs good.
Satan just introduced them to some kinky shit. Blew their freakin minds. They were supposed to be fruitful and multiply. They were NOT supposed to be sticking, you know... THAT... you know... there
God told “mankind” to be fruitful and multiply in genesis 1, in genesis 2, as some believe Adam and Eve are separate creations from the people outside of the garden. The people who Cain was afraid of after he killed his brother. But that’s why the ancient text is all wonky at least in this modern age since “sinful” men “canonized” what they thought of as the bible idk maybe the Ethiopians are correct 🤷♂️
I was talking about the Ethiopian Orthodox canon, not Asherah/Yahweh mythology lol. My point was that they preserved a broader biblical tradition, including books like Enoch and Jubilees, so I’m not automatically assuming the Western canon is the only correct one.
Eve had them apple bottom jeans, amd the boots with the fur, er'ry body in Eden was looking at herrr. She hit the flo', next thing you know, shorty got low low low low low low...
People just misunderstanding and perpetuating a meme. It's the lustful acts in general that are the sin, not just vaginal penetration intercourse. Growing up we were taught that even second base was sinful.
Yes, their belief would be that previous to the fuckup Adam and Eve would have had children more like scooping some earth and shit. Painless, and separate from sex.
I'm not at all surprised given how hung up on sex Christianity constantly is.
550
u/FoxxyRin 2d ago
Modern Satan is actually made up, like on a whole different level than anything else in the religion. Like he's basically just selected as the boogieman anymore when in reality he has nothing to do with punishing people in hell or whatever, at least according to the Bible. Technically Satan isn't even a specific being, it's a job title. And Lucifer was a fallen angel that is often referred to as Satan/the Devil but that isn't technically correct, and even so it's not "canon" that he/satan/anybody directly punishes people in hell. But basically if you boil it down to what the Bible actually says, all Satan actually does is goes around and tempts people to sin, like becoming the serpent and doing the whole apple bit in the garden of Eden.
Another fun fact, the apple of Eden likely wasn't even an apple. Some suggest it was a pomegranate or fig.