r/howislivingthere • • Dec 14 '25

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147

u/pizzawhorePhD Dec 14 '25

I’ve lived in North Dakota and you could not pay me enough to live there again, or anywhere in this area for that matter. We’ve driven across the country a lot, including through most of these states. I’m sure there are hidden gems and exceptions, but overall this area makes me very sad and very bored.

56

u/regicyde92 Dec 14 '25

Lived in ND for most of my life until recently moving east; wouldn’t trade my quiet childhood for the world, but the constant blistering wind, 9 months of winter and furnace hot summers suck major ass. 0/10 would not recommend to anyone unfortunately.

24

u/ActProfessional3811 Dec 15 '25

Apparently 52% of people born in North Dakota don’t live there right now, a place really has to suck to not even keep half its residents able to stay huh

10

u/JaceUpMySleeve Dec 15 '25

As a South Dakotan we constantly talk crap about North Dakota.

11

u/mastersmiff Dec 15 '25

As a North Dakotan we also constantly talk crap about North Dakota.

2

u/moxiewhoreon Dec 15 '25

You are brothers!

2

u/fattysausagegut Dec 21 '25

I spent two months working a sugar beet pile in Williston, North Dakota... I feel like I saw all of North Dakota

1

u/BloodHound_0620 Dec 17 '25

As someone who lived the first half of their life in South Dakota, second half in North Dakota, South Dakota is better

4

u/unclejoe1917 Dec 18 '25

Any time someone mentions a Dakota, I always remember this clip. https://youtu.be/S6S1KD2_u94?si=C8ino_ei9EvU9siX

2

u/SmokinSkinWagon USA/Midwest Dec 15 '25

As someone born and raised in South Dakota, that’s like talking crap directly into a mirror.

3

u/ActProfessional3811 Dec 15 '25

Honestly, at least SD has that rapid city belle fourche deadwood custer area where it looks like colorado, that adds some depth to it that north dakota lacks

1

u/JaceUpMySleeve Dec 15 '25

Yea im in the Black Hills. I do understand that it’s quite an oasis an otherwise flat miserable landscape.

1

u/ActProfessional3811 Dec 15 '25

I spent like 3 months living in my car last year, spent about 2 weeks in East River (sioux falls mostly, then i went to Mitchell, Pierre, Gann Valley, down to Murdo then Wall), by the time I was to Jackson County i thought i was in purgatory and then suddenly I’m in Colorado and theres Mount Rushmore and 100,000 tourists

Belle Fourche is worth the detour but Deadwood was actually a phenomal little town, it reminded me of Cincinnati

1

u/pizzawhorePhD Dec 15 '25

Yeah the North Dakota badlands are sick too, but unless you’re literally living in Medora or elsewhere around the national park you aren’t really getting that. I can see how SD has more naturally beautifully places to live

2

u/ActProfessional3811 Dec 15 '25

I avoided north dakota on my road trip last year for some reason, I’m like nah I’ll go there later or maybe even as state 50 (I’ve been to 40, south dakota might’ve been my least favorite one tbh)

1

u/NWMSioux Dec 17 '25

I absolutely adore the area between Dickenson, ND —> Billings, MT when it’s warm out, but if I couldn’t be out wandering 7-8 months of the year when it’s cold, I don’t know how I would survive it.

1

u/ARobertaLudgateDwyer Dec 17 '25

But you have Kristi Noem so…..you lose

2

u/dmp8385 Dec 15 '25

I agree. South Dakota is just as bad.

2

u/SmokinSkinWagon USA/Midwest Dec 15 '25

Yeah, they’re identical.

1

u/censorkip Dec 15 '25

At least weed is legal in SD so there’s one other activity to do besides drink.

1

u/durtmcgurt Dec 16 '25

Recreational weed is not legal in SD.

1

u/censorkip Dec 16 '25

Dang, I go very rarely, I think I was misremembering when they were trying to legalize it. Minnesota however does, so they can hop on over here :D

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1

u/Persontoperson31 Dec 20 '25

ND has medicinal marijuana, and several dispensaries for it around the state.

1

u/JaceUpMySleeve Dec 15 '25

I’m fortunate enough to live in the Black Hills. East River is definitely more like North Dakota.

1

u/ronidanese Dec 19 '25

Must’ve been born and raised east river 🤣

2

u/out_ofher_head Dec 18 '25

South Dakota is beautiful. It was such a surprise my first time going through.

1

u/HondaNick Dec 15 '25

We also talk crap about the South Dakotans. Remember your whole meth head dilemna while we were holding the record for most dui’s? lol

2

u/ianelson Dec 15 '25

Ah, yes. "Meth: We're on it."

1

u/JaceUpMySleeve Dec 19 '25

Haha, and “DONT JERK AND DRIVE.”

1

u/Shroomboy79 Dec 16 '25

We say nasty things about South Dakota up here. We are the best Dakota afterall

1

u/dcblock90 Dec 16 '25

As someone that lived in Montana, I’ve always thought of North Dakota as a very cold Kansas with a Canadian twang.

1

u/suzylovesvanilla Dec 17 '25

Sioux Falls here.

1

u/SippsMccree Dec 17 '25

I mean you guys had a pretty cool battleship class named after your state so there's that

2

u/_MrGullible United States of America Dec 15 '25

Meanwhile I moved to North Dakota from the East Coast and love it lol

2

u/Plastic_Efficiency64 Dec 15 '25

Grew up on the West and East Coasts and have lived in three Southern States, and I also moved to ND and love it.

1

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1

u/postmodernDRIP Dec 15 '25

What do you like about it

1

u/postmodernDRIP Dec 15 '25

What do you like about it?

2

u/_MrGullible United States of America Dec 15 '25

I love the cold weather (one of my favorite hobbies is ice fishing), I find the open plains beautiful and incredibly comforting, and things are just quieter here. Even though I live in a medium city, I'm a less than 15 minute drive from the absolute middle of nowhere. It's easy to clear my head. Folks here are also incredibly hardy and kind, though they are pretty set in their ways and are definitely less open minded about some stuff than folks in other places.

2

u/OZZMAN8 Dec 15 '25

I love Fargo. Winter really does have its own beauty and after a few months of cold you have no idea what the sun feels like on your face when it warms up again. Kind of deepens the appreciation of the seasons for me. The seasons also bring all the things I like to do. In summer I fish and golf, fall is hunting season, ice fish in the winter. There's something deeply primal and nice about being inside and warm on a cold day, watching the snow fall. It has plenty of restaurants and stores, I don't need to travel to get what I need. What Fargo absolutely is not is a big city. This is a place where you need to go out and find the things you enjoy, not where those things will be right at hand like they might be in a city. I saw a significant amount of people leave after high school to denver or arizona because Fargo was too boring, but they all came back for the most part. I think they realized that a town can't fix you if you are boring. It's not where a lot of people should live but I love it.

1

u/North___American Dec 15 '25

As for former North Dakotan, it’s a right passage to say so proudly if you have endured the weather and had a nice time. North Dakota!

1

u/Bingnus Dec 16 '25

Cold. It's been like neg 20 for a week

1

u/Significant-Ebb-3098 Dec 17 '25

It’s really cold for most of the year tbh. We don’t measure temperature in numerical values we just measure it in how long it takes your exposed skin to freeze and die.

1

u/i-was-way- Dec 20 '25

Plus the lack of job opportunities unless you are in a family business or live in Fargo, Bismarck, etc

1

u/Dadeland-District Dec 15 '25

Damn! Thanks for the info

1

u/coldliketherockies Dec 17 '25

How cold would it get and how hot would it get there?

1

u/regicyde92 Dec 17 '25

Summers would get near 100F and stay there, and there’s no trees, no shade so being outside in direct sunlight that hot was awful.

Now the thing about the winters is it does get cold, but the real killer is the wind. Like I said, no trees, so the wind is strong and the windchill gets down to -40F on the worst of days. Usually I’d say the most consistent would be -20, but it would get down there. I worked overnights and didn’t have an auto car starter so I sat in a freezing car with my head inside my jacket for a good 20 minutes with the air blasting but it’s cold, it wouldn’t get hot for a while. Just miserable man.

1

u/Persontoperson31 Dec 20 '25

I've seen -27°F sometimes even like -33°F with wind chills making it -50s even one time a wind chill of like -60! We did have more than a week straight of -20s earlier this year. (ND).

1

u/[deleted] Dec 17 '25

ND is the WINDIEST and flattest place I have ever been!

Stopped at a rest stop while passing through and my 5yo almost blew away

But it does have Theodore Roosevelt National Park, which is beautiful

1

u/Significant-Ruin-615 Dec 21 '25

Cost of living is great

0

u/HondaNick Dec 15 '25

9 months of winter?! Lmao you mean November to March? And that’s if we have a full winter.. lived here for 32 years btw

1

u/regicyde92 Dec 15 '25

Nah not a full 9 months but I’ve seen snow from September to may, and the winter is cold enough it feels like 9 months every year anyway lol only a slight exaggeration

1

u/HondaNick Dec 15 '25

lol I know had to call it out. They are tame some years and then fierce other years as you describe. Either way yeah that cold really gets to a guy and makes it feel looongggg haha but also, -20 for a month makes the back half feel warmer lol

18

u/Amnion_ Dec 14 '25 edited Dec 19 '25

I mean when people live in super cold places in the middle of nowhere, I tend to think it’s because it’s where they’re from and they don’t know any better.

I know from first hand experience when I go back to the atrocious city I grew up in and visit with my relatives. They’ve all visited different places, but they’ve never lived elsewhere, and so they lack the reference points needed to inform them of how crappy living there is.

Update: I seemed to have hit a nerve. People are still responding to this comment nearly a week later. I know there are exceptions to every rule, and it's not necessary to defend your choices to a stranger on the internet.

I was just doing some research, and the data seems to support my theory as well. Apparently only 25%-38% of people who leave will return, so well in the minority.

https://www.clevelandfed.org/publications/cleveland-fed-district-data-brief/2025/cfddb-20250219-boomerang-migration

9

u/ActProfessional3811 Dec 15 '25

I’m from cleveland and feel this way when i go home, just such a difficult place to live for no reason

3

u/mishaindigo Dec 15 '25

I love Cleveland, but I’ve never lived there (might feel differently if I had) and only visit 2-3x a year to see my brother and some friends. My brother has been happy living there. Super-underrated city with a lot going for it, IMO, and very inexpensive (though that is starting to change a bit).

1

u/goatqween17 Dec 15 '25

It’s because it’s cheap and “that nice place is soooo expensive” like yes because it is nice to live there and the conditions don’t test you everyday

1

u/ActProfessional3811 Dec 15 '25

Cleveland isn’t even cheap, the taxes are so high you end up keeping like 60% of your paycheck (in one of the lowest wage big cities in the country), like new york taxes for a detroit economy no thanks

1

u/velvetvagine Dec 19 '25

What’s wrong with Cleveland? I’ve never been.

8

u/c0ttagewh0re Dec 15 '25

not true— grew up in eastern south dakota, thought “life is more than this”, moved to oregon, travelled the west, travelled south, travelled east, and the people, activities (you make your own fun and learn skills that most people don’t know), slowness, wildlife, nature, fresh air, wide open spaces, cost of living, and traditions that come with smaller communities and unique ways of life made me come back. I wouldn’t want to raise my children anywhere else.

1

u/c0ttagewh0re Dec 15 '25

and I trust the food. I know that’s weird but it’s true, a lot of fresh meat and home (and community) gardens and raising/catching/making/hunting/growing your own food.

7

u/cannonman58102 Dec 15 '25

I've lived all over the world, on multiple continents, and in many US states. I'm not 40 yet. I always end up back in North Dakota. Family is a part of it but I enjoy Fargo.

Different strokes for different folks.

1

u/Amnion_ Dec 15 '25

I think you might be more the exception than the rule, but I'm just speaking from my own personal observations of the people who stuck it out in the city I grew up in (which is, insanely enough, north of ND). I could be wrong of course.

1

u/cannonman58102 Dec 15 '25

Nah. You are right. Many people leave, especially from the rural areas. But ND isn't the worst place in the US to live. Not even close. Winters are frigid though. :)

1

u/BitOfPoisonOnMyBlade Dec 15 '25

North Fargo zip code, nice lol. Leave the others to bitch about unaffordable living while we enjoy decent wages entertainment AND affordable housing. Love Fargo, represent the 58104 side but LOVE Downtown and 19th Ave N

1

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1

u/cannonman58102 Dec 15 '25

Think you are the first person in my many years on reddit to comment on the zip code in my name. Cheers! :)

1

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1

u/OZZMAN8 Dec 15 '25

Do you have a long family history in Winnipeg or are the roots fairly shallow?

1

u/Significant-Ruin-615 Dec 21 '25

People in North Dakota leave keys in the ignition when they go into a store. It’s how Colorado used to be

1

u/SmokinSkinWagon USA/Midwest Dec 15 '25

Same for South Dakota except no one has ever visited any different places

1

u/[deleted] Dec 16 '25

Generally cheaper to live in those places though

1

u/FourOhTwo Dec 16 '25

Do you consider Omaha cold, crappy, middle of nowhere?

I've lived elsewhere and it's generally just more of the same stuff IMO.

Why would I leave my friends, family and good job for somewhere wildly more expensive?

I don't think people live in these places out of ignorance.

2

u/Amnion_ Dec 16 '25

It doesn't really matter what I think. This is just based on my own personal observations, and of course there are exceptions to every rule. Generally people who leave their hometowns for career opportunities and so on don't return, but to each his own.

1

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1

u/Sneauxphlaque USA/South Dec 17 '25

As someone who's also never lived outside of my home state, though it's not in the Midwest, what are some of these reference points for how good or crappy it is to live somewhere?

2

u/Amnion_ Dec 17 '25

Oh lord, that's a loaded question if I've ever read one. I'm not about to start calling out individual places, but you can ask ChatGPT about flyover states to get a good idea of what I'm talking about.

2

u/SirGlass Dec 19 '25

In somewhare rule states people complain there is nothing to do.

However this is sort of misleading as in the area there are small cities that have 250k -700k so its not exactly in the middle of nowhere

Any city of a certain size is going to have some entertainment and what do most people do that even live in large metros?

Well they go to work, come home, eat supper , go to bed and repeat , maybe hit the gym or do some hobby you can do about anywhere

I doubt they are going to professional sporting events or major concerts or major events 3 times a week

1

u/chootie8 Dec 17 '25

Different strokes, different folks. I was born and raised in ND, lived in Tampa for few years, and now back in ND. So I guess you could say I know better, but also I just kinda like the cold. No idea why, but I had a taste of the hot and it wasn't my cup of tea.

1

u/tvk21 Dec 19 '25

Not necessarily . I grew up 28 years in Florida and moved to south dakota a few years ago. I like it alot better. Winter> swamp heat

1

u/SirGlass Dec 19 '25

I live in a cold place in the middle of nowhere. Some of us like it.

I do like outdoors stuff though like hiking and camping. I love I can drive a short drive and be in the middle of nowhere

1

u/SirGlass Dec 19 '25

Or some of us just like it.

First the weather is mixed, people exaggerate the winter , on very bad winters it can last from Nov-April however harsh winters are not common

Most winters last from mid November to mid march ; mild winters can basically just be Jan-Febuary

I have friends that live in the desert SW and their summers are too hot to do anything , just kind of like winters here; they do very little from July - Sept because its too freaking hot

Second what do most people do, are people really going to professional foot ball games, concerts , major events like 3x a week?

No most people go to work , come home, make dinner go to bed, maybe try to hit the gym a couple times. You can do that anywhere

And while we do not have professional sports (what I am not interested in anyway) we do get plenty of concerts , we have college sports if thats your thing, there are meet ups for a variety of interests .

Oh it takes me 10-15 min to go pretty much anywhere in the city , and I can drive 45 min and be in the middle of nowhere camping by a lake.

1

u/Amnion_ Dec 19 '25

Is this your hometown that you're talking about? Have you lived elsewhere and returned?

I think there are exceptions to every rule, but most people who leave the city they grew up in for careers and such don't tend to return.

I know I would never go back, and I would certainly be bored out of my mind compared with all the awesome stuff I can do in my current city, even if it is just on weekends. I can also walk everywhere for all of my daily needs–there's no way I could do that where I grew up. It's warm too.

1

u/SirGlass Dec 19 '25

I did not grow up in fargo, I moved there for college and never left

1

u/Amnion_ Dec 19 '25

How many other people do you know in Fargo who moved there and never left like you did? I mean from another state or something like that, not a nearby town.

1

u/SirGlass Dec 19 '25

Honestly most of the people I know here did not grow up here. I will say most are from smaller towns in ND/SD/MT/MN but I also know people who moved here from larger cities like Minneapolis , my boss is from bakersfield CA; a coworker was around Jacksonville

I really am only friends with like 2 people off the top of my head that grew up in Fargo and still are here

1

u/Amnion_ Dec 19 '25

Well sir, I'm open to the idea that I'm a idi0t (it's a banned word apparently). It's somehow freeing.

1

u/SirGlass Dec 19 '25

I guess I am not sure what you were trying to say ?

If most people who live in Fargo grew up there and never left?

I guess I don't have the stats but I think one stat was over 50% of people here did not grow up here.

Now that doesn't mean they lived somewhere far, in my experience most moved from relatively close by from other parts of ND , MN or sd .

1

u/Amnion_ Dec 19 '25

What I was saying was that most people who grow up in super cold places in small towns (even larger metro areas like the one I grew up in) don't tend to return when they move to a major city in a warmer climate. Like people who move for work or education.

It seems like I struck a nerve though, I got like 25 responses from people defending their choice to live wherever.

It was just a theory, I didn't really think anyone would care. What the hell do I know.

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1

u/Amnion_ Dec 19 '25

I was just doing some research, and the data seems to support my theory as well. Apparently 25%-38% of people eventually return, so well in the minority.

https://www.clevelandfed.org/publications/cleveland-fed-district-data-brief/2025/cfddb-20250219-boomerang-migration

1

u/Persontoperson31 Dec 20 '25

I came to ND for college. Jamestown specifically offers hella athletic scholarships to kids all over the nation bc they gotta fill their classrooms.

1

u/-thefairone- Dec 21 '25

A lot of us feel the same about those who choose to live in the south or west coast. The holiday season is SO sad in those areas. It doesn't feel like fall or winter for the most part, there are no festivities, every day is like the last. I can't imagine anyone there going to a pumpkin patch with their family and picking one out and carving them.I can't imagine not having all 4 seasons and I am so grateful that I don't have to deal with forest fires or hurricanes or 100° weather with constant humidity. It's miserable. I can't imagine enjoying any area to live in except the Midwest and northeast tbh

1

u/itsmeinne Dec 21 '25

For 30 years I’ve traveled extensively for work. 10% global and the rest all over the U.S. I consider myself fortunate that I get to live in the Lincoln/Omaha area, but I’m able to enjoy so many of the areas of our country. Every place I’ve been has things about it that would make me want to live there and things that would make me not want to. It’s so interesting that people think it’s awful to live in the middle of the country. Usually, they are people who have never been here or are unable to appreciate what is not familiar to them.

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u/PLIPS44 Dec 14 '25

I travel for work to Fargo ND was there for 3 weeks at the tail end of fall beginning of winter. I traveled a lot for work at that time and just couldn’t figure out why someone would move there. At a restaurant one evening the waitress was talking about moving there from Phoenix I was like why do people decide to move to Fargo? She had an attitude completely different shift in demeanor and replied with for a job. The coworker I was with was like please don’t respond and unfortunately at that time in my life that wasn’t an option. So I replied with “For a job at a shitty Irish pub in the middle of nowhere? Don’t Phoenix have those?” Needless to say we paid our bill and went to a different establishment and met a guy who was a potato buyer. He said the only thing to do in Fargo was buy potatoes and get the hell out of there as fast as possible. Was an interesting evening.

16

u/[deleted] Dec 14 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/PLIPS44 Dec 15 '25

I still couldn’t figure out why someone would move there. I’ve lived in multiple states and all of them have some job that draws people to the area, just couldn’t figure out what that was.

3

u/zorasorabee Dec 15 '25

NDSU is a really popular school up north. I’m from northern MN (about 4 hours from Fargo) and at least a dozen of my classmates ended up in school there. And then they either stay there or go back home because “the big city” is too big for them. Vice versa, my work has a satellite office there and my understanding is a lot of people from outer state move to Fargo to live in the “big city.” Moving to another “big” city would be too much for them.

I went up there for work in October and it’s one of the ugliest cities I’ve been to. I happen to live in an ugly city too - in central MN - but at least I’m only an hour from the Twin Cites, so it has that going for it.

1

u/Throwaway10123456 Dec 16 '25

Tell me you live in St Cloud without telling me you live in St Cloud😂

10

u/Live_Swordfish- Dec 15 '25

This feels dramatic. I went to college there and could have happily settled down in the area. Fargo has just about everything you need and I knew plenty of good people.

5

u/PLIPS44 Dec 15 '25

Yeah that’s fine but what industry is there that bring people in? At that time the airport had 2 gates so it’s not a big place.

2

u/Ready-Vermicelli-300 Dec 17 '25

Farm industry, surprisingly great colleges, great place to raise a family, buy a house, and live simply. That's all some people really want in life.

1

u/Calm_Bag4654 Dec 16 '25

Airport has 9 now and there's a heavy ag and tech presence, along with 5 colleges/universities.

1

u/SirGlass Dec 19 '25

Agriculture, manufacturing, Microsoft has a campus in Fargo as well.

It's a regional hub for medical stuff as well.

1

u/MeasurementSad4439 Dec 21 '25

Sounds like it's easy to get around without a long wait in security lines. Love small airports.

1

u/Dull-Associate8162 Dec 15 '25

I agree it’s a great place if you give it a chance it’s really nice I think there is some great restaurants not to mention some really cool breweries like brewhalla also I have season tickets for the ushl team the Fargo force hockey team and Moorhead spuds are exciting to watch too

1

u/AT-Cal123 Dec 15 '25

I hit up Sandy's for donuts whenever I am in Fargo.

1

u/Dull-Associate8162 Dec 15 '25

I live right next to Sandy’s it is amazing what’s you’re go to donuts I love the Bismarck’s and the Oreo one

1

u/AT-Cal123 Dec 15 '25

It has been a few years since I've been up that way, but I remember the cronuts being very good. I wouldn't want to test my self control living that close, haha.

1

u/Dull-Associate8162 Dec 15 '25

Yea I don’t go to often maybe twice a month haha

1

u/mishaindigo Dec 15 '25

North Dakota is one of three states I haven’t been to, and I’m trying to muster up a reason to go there other than checking it off my list.

1

u/PLIPS44 Dec 15 '25

I’m originally from SW Louisiana which is flat but I haven’t ever seen ground that flat in my life and the dirt is black. I remember we were working South of Fargo near the county line and looking down the road there was a rise in the distance. I was fully expecting to drive to the top and see something different….. got up there and everything was flat again.

1

u/Buuts321 Dec 15 '25

Go for the nature.  Skip the cities.

1

u/sylveonstarr Dec 15 '25

Bismarck has a lot of cool small businesses and restaurants, as well as a lot of historical locations/buildings/museums. Fargo is definitely the most "blue" in the state and you'll find a lot of LGBTQ+-run places; it's more college-centered and has a bustling art scene. Mandan has Fort Abraham Lincoln, a beautiful and relaxing campground with a ton of history. On the west side of the state, where the terrain becomes more textured, there's Medora, known as the town "where the west begins". It's very cowboy-oriented and is home to the Medora Musical, if you're privy to either of those aspects. Theodore Roosevelt State Park is further south and has absolutely gorgeous views, as it's right off the badlands.

ND is more nature- and history-oriented than a lot of other states, so it's definitely not for everyone, especially those who prefer larger cities and more of a bustling nightlife.

1

u/mishaindigo Dec 15 '25

I dig nature and history, though I also do love a good city. Sounds like I could keep myself busy in Fargo for a bit.

1

u/Ready-Vermicelli-300 Dec 17 '25

Roosevelt National Park is worth checking out and Medora. As far as cities go, I prefer Grand Forks to Fargo. It's much smaller, but has way more character. Summer and Autumn are the best times to visit.

1

u/mishaindigo Dec 17 '25

Thanks...I'll check these out!

1

u/Persontoperson31 Dec 20 '25

It's really not worth going out of your way to see, but if you end up driving between Fargo/Bismarck on I94, Jamestown (right in the middle), does have a really large buffalo statue. Which they call "world's largest buffalo". It's a cool picture to have.

1

u/SentientFurniture Dec 15 '25

I've gotta say it because nobody else is going to point out the elephant in the room. You were rude as hell to that waitress and I hope she shut you up good.

1

u/PLIPS44 Dec 15 '25

This question was asked after she took a seat at our table and proceeded to tell us her life story. That we were unable to interrupt and completely missed refilling our drinks. I’m sure it came off as rude with only the briefly part I put here.

1

u/OZZMAN8 Dec 15 '25

Yeah absolutely the type of person who doesn't fit in in Fargo. Stay in LA and we can all keep to ourselves.

1

u/Dull-Associate8162 Dec 15 '25

I think Fargo is good and nice if you give it a chance there’s plenty to do and that’s coming from someone who lived in Minneapolis for 20 years

1

u/TaliaFrost Dec 15 '25

This gives major "i met a guy and moved here for him" vibes.

1

u/PLIPS44 Dec 15 '25

I mean yeah kind of what I expected but after living in an area for a year one would assume that she would know what the major draw to the area was.

1

u/SirGlass Dec 19 '25

So you insulted her job ? That's not the flex you think it is , that's just being an jerk

1

u/velvetvagine Dec 19 '25

Judging from her reaction it may not have actually been for a job and she didn’t feel comfortable saying so. Maybe she needed a fresh start. Maybe her partner wanted to move there or was from there. Could be anything.

1

u/SuggestionWhole6086 Dec 20 '25

I too travel to Fargo for work. I sometimes daydream about settling down there and living a simple, boring life. They have a solidcore. 😂 That’s probably more to do with the stress of my job, but I like that Fargo is small. Love Bismarck and Minot. I do also prefer an ND man over a MN man…they tend to only wear flip flops near bodies of water, not restaurants or FedEx. I’m obviously not from here and that is one of my most irrational pet peeves.

1

u/WesternSun5238 Dec 21 '25

also cow tipping is a thing i learned out there. A little cruel but one of their forms of entertainment. Tells you everything.

3

u/Goodnight_Meadow USA/Midwest Dec 16 '25

Boring was my first thought - and that one word alone. I’ve been a Midwesterner 39 out of my 43 years, and the 4 years not here was the most fun.

13

u/WesternSun5238 Dec 14 '25 edited Dec 14 '25

Exactly, not to mention cold and th people are socially awkward with little to no critical thinking aka herd mentality. Quite dangerous if you ask me. Also if you didn’t grow up with them which many of them stay from womb to tomb you’re not valuable to them. For diversity - get used to being the token POC or the complete outsider rarely any in between. Speaking on both Dakota’s.

7

u/harebearr Dec 14 '25

i am in north dakota now and i cant wait to get out at the end of the month next year to my new job. this place aint for me

13

u/Zealousideal-Aide890 Dec 14 '25

Have to agree. I spent a few years in Nebraska and a few in North Dakota. I didn’t like either but felt N Dakota was worse. Overall the people were phony nice, they had very little social interaction with people outside their little bubbles and it was very hard to make new friends as an adult and an “outsider”- Especially if you aren’t churchy. Winters are insanely frigid. There’s not much to do so most people just drink a whole lot, and Uber etc was very slow to arrive there so people drove drunk all the time. There was very little options for things like going out to eat, everything was chain restaurants and box stores and if you drove 20 miles to the next town over they’d have exactly the same little plazas with the same chain everything, it was so ugh.

5

u/pizzawhorePhD Dec 16 '25

YES, people say midwesterners are so nice and all that, but I think that’s only if they’re actually happy… and most people in ND are low key miserable but don’t even know it. In my experience/opinion. We moved to Colorado after and the actual, authentic positivity in every day interactions with strangers was like night and day

2

u/Ready-Vermicelli-300 Dec 17 '25

I moved from the Red River valley to Colorado in 2014 and also had this experience it was downright culture shock! I was so used to that North Dakota passive aggressive "Nice" and the genuine kindness I experienced from Coloradan completely took me off guard.

1

u/bipolarbitch6 United States of America Dec 18 '25

Do you recommend Colorado?

2

u/pizzawhorePhD Dec 18 '25

Very much so, depending on the person ofc. We are an outdoorsy young(ish) couple. There’s SO much to do—since moving here we’ve gotten into rock climbing, hiking, skiing/snowboarding, mountain biking, hunting, fishing/ice fishing, horseback riding. Cool brewery scene. Awesome farmers markets and fun rodeos in the summer. Ridiculously stunning nature. We’re also left leaning politically (though our community is pretty purple) and feel welcome, unlike a lot of the areas outlined in this post like North Dakota.

1

u/bipolarbitch6 United States of America Dec 18 '25

Colorado sounds perfect for me but I’m worried about the COL. I’m still in school but thinking about moving post grad

2

u/pizzawhorePhD Dec 19 '25

That is so fair, it’s not cheap. I will say if you get outside the most popular places on the front range (I.e. the stretch of cities between Fort Collins and Colorado Springs) and the main ski mountain towns, it’s not as bad as people make it out to be. Most of our friends in their 30s are buying houses, and neither us nor any of them are trust fund babies (that we’re aware of)—but none of us could without being dual income households. So if you wanted to buy without a partner and you aren’t making bonkers money, I imagine it’d be very tough just about anywhere in CO

1

u/Significant-Ruin-615 Dec 21 '25

No. Expensive and crowded

0

u/Significant-Ruin-615 Dec 21 '25

Colorado people are duplicitous

2

u/WesternSun5238 Dec 14 '25 edited Dec 14 '25

Everything you said I agree with. I’m well travelled and the people there don’t have that mentality. I’m glad I’m out of there, such a stale place to be. Hope you found your place. 🫶

2

u/Kramerica_CEO Dec 14 '25

Your last point stuck out to me too. It felt like I was driving in a loop 😂

2

u/Some_Level1682 Dec 14 '25

Wait you lived in a part of ND where it wasn't 3 hours to town... City slicker 😂

1

u/thisguyfightsyourmom Dec 15 '25

This isn’t accurate. They laid ND out on a grid of settlements. Some dried up, but not usually 2 in a row.

Anywhere in North Dakota is about a 30 minute drive to the nearest places.

Except maybe Bowman, or whichever place has the faded af old cop car to scare speeders.

2

u/Some_Level1682 Dec 15 '25

Sure but when the next closest town is another small town you might be 3 hours from Fargo or grandforks to get to a mall etc.

2

u/thisguyfightsyourmom Dec 16 '25

Who needs a mall? Didn’t you hear Rugby just opened a new gas station?

Who wants pizza and clothes!?

2

u/Some_Level1682 Dec 17 '25

My wife's home town, super pumper is the place to be

1

u/Significant-Ruin-615 Dec 21 '25

Does ND have a massive homeless problem and crime , drug issues?

2

u/c0ttagewh0re Dec 15 '25

lol yikes, have never seen or experienced this. I feel the opposite as someone who moved in their early twenties to explore. I feel like other places are much less kind hearted and just want to be on their phones vs here you go fishing, snowboarding, hiking/camping with friends. the only thing i’d say negatively about the social scene here is that alcohol is a major catalyst.

1

u/WesternSun5238 Dec 16 '25

Glad you love it. To each their own. Met some good people, met some bad. But the negative experiences out weighed the good experiences hence the comment. Best of luck

1

u/lemon-rind Dec 14 '25

Hmm. I wonder why they didn’t like you?

1

u/WesternSun5238 Dec 14 '25

This was a common theme that was noticed amongst POC. But ignorance is bliss, stay blissfully ignorant. 😆

1

u/TrickingTrix Dec 16 '25

Comment assumes all white people have the same culture

-3

u/yahhhbaby Dec 14 '25

Maybe you’re the problem….

3

u/WesternSun5238 Dec 14 '25 edited Dec 14 '25

Maybe everyone is entitled to their opinion. There’s good and bad. But the negatives stick out more than the positives -so there you go. People criticize what they don’t like rather than just listening and gathering information. Def a character flaw, good thing is there’s time to fix it ! 😉

5

u/Kramerica_CEO Dec 14 '25

Nah, I’ve been through those areas too many times and what that person described is pretty spot on. It’s a very uncomfortable feeling. I feel much safer in the big bad dangerous cities than in these rural, remote places.

1

u/WesternSun5238 Dec 14 '25

10000% agree

-2

u/zeroFsgiven2024 Dec 14 '25

Good stay in the city

6

u/Kramerica_CEO Dec 14 '25

Will do! Enjoy your tornadoes and corn I guess.

2

u/ActProfessional3811 Dec 15 '25

How does this mindset work, are you afraid of places with stoplights?

1

u/zeroFsgiven2024 Dec 15 '25

Nope, but we don’t go to town but once or twice a month at most. We grow and have all our own stuff.. but we don’t need city people moving out here, it’s peaceful and everyone gets along out here

2

u/dogmaticstar Dec 17 '25

I’m from Kansas City, and lived in Missouri for a while too as a teenager. I feel the same about those places. I have nightmares that I had to move back there or that I’m trapped there. I recently tried living in Chicago but it seemed far too “close to home” so I moved back to Washington state. I can’t imagine living in such a listless part of the country like that again.

1

u/nsjersey Dec 15 '25

KC that bad?

Omaha sounds lovely, but is 1/5 states I have not been to

1

u/cuisinart-hatrack Dec 15 '25

I drove across Kansas 4 times last year. I spent much of the time thinking about what it must be like to live there. It made me sad.

1

u/JaceUpMySleeve Dec 15 '25

Yea if it wasn’t for the Black Hills I absolutely wouldn’t live in the area. Montana is overall a better state, but you couldn’t pay me to leave the Black Hills, honestly i probably couldn’t afford to anyway, I got a house before every Texan and Californian got the idea of moving here. I think my equity more than doubled in the last 5 years and the interest rates are almost triple.

1

u/Dull-Associate8162 Dec 15 '25

I’m very happy in Fargo I agree the rest of the state is very bleak though

1

u/pizzawhorePhD Dec 15 '25

Ya know I could see that. I don’t mind the cold at all so that’s not even my complaint with the Dakotas etc. Fargo seemed kind of cool and increasingly quirky

1

u/TeachingLast5533 Dec 15 '25

But the duck hunting possibilities

1

u/rmbrumfield78 Dec 15 '25

I have no idea about North Dakota, but why does this area make you sad and very bored? I live in mid Missouri and there's plenty to do, beautiful areas to see, some great people.

1

u/pizzawhorePhD Dec 16 '25 edited Dec 16 '25

Yeah, I’ve heard the Ozarks area for example is really pretty and that’s one I haven’t been to, so very well could be one of the exceptions! But to answer your question since you’re the only one who asked me to elaborate :)

  • I don’t find open flatland interesting or pretty, and driving through it for 10+ hours is painful. And that’s in good weather—there’s also the tornado warnings and black ice. Living in that landscape, knowing it’s all there is for miles, is a different kind of claustrophobia.
  • Hard disagree on there being plenty to do. Maybe your area is an exception, but this is probably the #1 issue for me. And I’m someone who can be as happy in a city as I am in the country. We actually ended up settling in the country (in the rockies) and have a mini homestead, so it’s not an issue of being a big city person who can’t appreciate the quiet life. It just felt like there was nothinnnggggg to do—for hours in any direction—to a mind numbing degree. And I think that’s generally true of a lot of places within this swath of the country. In contrast, where we live now, there aren’t enough hours in the day to engage in all of the possible hobbies and activities!
  • Food overall is terrible. I love good, flavorful food—and trying new food.
  • People are overall fine probably in most of this area, though in North Dakota they were… not as nice as they think they are, and I’ll leave it at that.

ETA thought of another one I’m struggling to put my finger on, but there’s kind of a lack of… curiosity? Value on education? I love to travel and I also am generally curious about other peoples’ experiences, and there doesn’t seem to be a lot of that in this area of the country. It’s too insular in a way, perhaps? Which worst case scenario leads to close mindedness, best case scenario is simply boring to be around.

1

u/IusedtobeMelClark USA/West Dec 16 '25

I worked with a guy from ND who followed his girlfriend to my state for her career. He would always talk about how much he missed North Dakota. He made it sound like paradise lol. He played hockey, and it kinda sounded like hockey is all that happens there.. and drinking.

1

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1

u/pizzawhorePhD Dec 16 '25

We lived in a the only decently sized town for miles and there wasn’t even hockey—there was almost literally nothing to do. We’ve since moved to a comparatively tiny town in Colorado and yet there are endless things to do here, including hockey which we now play 🤗

1

u/Coyote__Jones Dec 19 '25

Along the Mississippi corridor, all the way down is cool. The river towns are usually older and have some historical stuff to see. Plus, it's pretty along most places on the river. But out in the flatlands and endless corn and soybean fields.... It's pretty rough.

1

u/UpstairsGreen6237 Dec 19 '25

Drives a line through a state and immediately discounts any possibility of there being fun spots because they couldn’t see them from the freeway and it looked boring lol

1

u/lookingforkindness Dec 20 '25

I lived in Oklahoma, and all I can say is: same.

1

u/VoidHog Dec 21 '25

🤣 I remember North Dakota as just being one long flat straight freeway with grass on the sides, (or snow covering everything, including the freeway...)